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| **The scene opens to Pledge Alligence�s home in Rochester, New York. Inside, the lighting at the apex of the vaulted ceiling creates a halo of light in the center of the wrestling ring Pledge has erected in the center of the room. Around it are several stations of free weights and training gear. As Osbourne finished up a few reps of bench presses, Pledge stands over him spotting. The two are in mid-discussion about their strategy for Saturday Night Showdown and their Four Corners Tornado Tag match.**
Pledge: 4��..5��..6�you know, if you go that slow when you�re in the ring you�re gonna be mince meat�. NRO: Shut�..the�.hell�..up�..I�..can�..beat��.all��3��of�..you� Pledge: 7��.8��.9�.one more�..10! Set. Listen Robbie you really have to be on you�re a game Saturday night. I am taking a HUGE risk trusting you�(rubs his head as if re-feeling the pain caused by Osbourne�s chair shot that left him thinking he was Teddy Turbuckle for over a week) and I�m still not sure that was the smartest thing I have done recently. NRO: Oh will you stop whining you big girls blouse? What other choice did either of us have? They give you lemons, you make lemonade�.in our case they gave us two heaping, festering piles of shit. Pledge: So we make poop-aide? NRO: Yes Mr. PG-13, we make poop-aide. What have you got better to do? Pledge: Well�.. NRO: Look man, it could be worse, you could be spending your time sitting in a hospital. Our Chumps seem to be doing a lot of hospital visits this week don�t they? Regular fucking Candy Stripers. You got Jimmy Jugs crying about some dirt bag from the ghetto that did the world a favor by dying. Then you have the CWF World Chump going and ruining what�s left of some little cancer-stricken kid�s life? Fucking clown shoes. Pledge: Listen man, we need to make sure we keep them neutralized. Can you stay sober and clear eyed for the next 72 hours on your own or do you need to stay here and be supervised? NRO: Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa�whoa! I don�t ask you when your gonna quit poppin� roids you don�t ask me about my herbal remedies or my acquired taste for the barley and hops of Holland. Capesche? **Osbourne and Pledge stretch and then climb in the practice ring. They both don sparring masks and begin circling around.** Pledge: You wanna ring the bell old man or should I? NRO: Who you callin� old man? Be my guest�. Pledge: (makes tapping motion with his hand) Ding Ding�. **The two estranged half-brothers spend the next hour going through move sets and drills. The action in the sparring ring is better than that of most Showdown Main Event matches. An hour and a half later Osbourne, winded and sweating profusely, sits don on the mat with a towel draped over his head. Pledge climbs back hrough the ropes and tosses him a Heinken. As he pops the top he speaks.** NRO: So much for staying sober huh? Hey man, I'm felling a little light headed...is it just stuffy in here or something? Pledge: Yeah, I thinkit must be, I'm a little dizzy myself. I did realize your best moments have been when you were inebriated. I figure if I want you at the top of your game Saturday I need to get you waxed like a candle first. NRO: Now yer talkin�! Hit the showers meat bag, we�re goin out to celebrate! Pledge: Celebrate what you imbecile? NRO: Our big win this Saturday�never too early to celebrate a win so huge. Pledge: Did I hit you on the head? I don�t remember dropping you on your thick noggin�. NRO: It�s 99% what you think in your mind Pledge. Henry Ford said it best �Whether you think you can, or you think you can�t�.you�re right.� Pledge: What gives with all the historical quotes little brother? NRO: Oh, I just know that HISTORY and the PAST are very important. Without them we wouldn�t know how to navigate the future. Pledge: Oh brother....here we go.... **As the two head towards the door Osbourne announces he is driving. They hop in his Maserati and head off. About fifteen minutes later as they exit the interstate to get gas they head down a deserted road towards the nearest station. Suddenly a crazy looking old man with bushy balding white hair with an orange trench coat and weird oversized mirrored sunglasses jumps out and Osbourne slams on the brakes and fishtails to a stop just as the man cringes for impact. Osbourne and Pledge hop out.....** NRO: What the fuck?!?! Man: Do you know where Marty is? Pledge: Who? Marty....I don't know a Marty....you Rob? NRO: Holy Shit! Pledge do you know who this is..... Man: Great Scott!! Do YOU know who I am? NRO: Doc Brown? Man: HA! Marty has been here! I knew it! It is imperative that I find him. He's got to back to 1985 and stop biff from molesting his sister! NRO: Whoa! That's heavy doc! Listen....I think Marty headed that way (points over his shoulder) look, you can't leave the delorean out in plain sight like that... . Man: I moved it....it's behind those trees....do you think it's safe? NRO: No way. Rochester is a shit hole. Bunch of card carrying commies if you ask me. I'll gladly hide the car over at my friend Pledge's house for you....here's the address...(Osbourne scribbles an address and hands it to him) Give me the keys, I'll keep the car safe and you go find Marty. Man: Friend...I will see you with young McFly in tow post haste! **Doc Brown tosses Rob the keys and runs off calling to Marty.....Osbourne quickly dials a number on his phone and tells Alex Romanov where his Maserati will be parked. Then he and Pledge get out of his car and into the Delorean.** Pledge: Rob, what on earth are you thinking??? NRO: Dude, we're going BACK to the FUTURE!!!! Pledge: Oh.....My....God. Are you serious? Do you really think this is THE Delorean and thats THE Doc Brown? Christina was right, you have smoked yourself retarded. NRO: Oh, and he just HAPPENS to be looking for Marty McFly? Hello? MCFLY? Pledge: Dually noted. So, what's the plan? NRO: Well, I say we punch in the date, shoot this sumbitch up to 88 miles per hour and change the past baby! Hell, Adams accuses me of living in it, let's visit his.... Pledge: Right...but when. I mean, it's not like there are that many high points to choose from in his less than stellar career. Hey, how about one of his many title wins, since he mocks you for never having CWF gold, although I did check little brother, and other than the 4 way macth that was Z, me, you, and Evil Andu...and I pinned Z for the win and the strap, you have never lost a match in the CWF have you? Son of a bitch! NRO: You know, I never lost a match in the MWWF for two years....until "The Fluke" Pledge: You mean Maniac, right? NRO: SHHHHHH!!!!!! We do not say his name. For is we speak of him of who we do not speak then he will show up. And honestly, I can't handle that right now. Pledge: Not to be a party pooper, but back to the task at hand. WHEN do we attack Adams. Name the CWF title run.... **Osbourne gets out his iPhone and goes to the CWF web site. He goes to the title histories from each era. He laughs out loud as Pledge inquires....** Pledge: What? What is so funny? **Osbourne hands Pledge his phone and Pledge starts chuckling as well.** NRO: Says here, the only record of a championship showing other than his current one, was a one week tag title reign in December of 1999....are you serious? Pledge: Sir, the web site must be wrong. Or is it??? so, are we gonna party like it's 1999??? NRO: Word son. **Osbourne pulls the car onto the road and floors it. As the speedometer hits 87 the indicator lights blink 12/22/1999 and the world around them for an instant is a bolt of blue energy engulfing the car and they crash back into reality on the same road. As they do the Delorean blows a tire and the roll on at a slow pace on the rim for a mile to the nearest gas station. Osbourne gets out and walks inside as Pledge surveys the damage and attempts to see if he can get a signal.** Clerk: Can I help you sir? NRO: Hmmmm......You don't look right. Clerk: WHAT?!?! NRO: No, I meant...well...can I ask you a question? Clerk: I'm a woman you asshole. NRO: Really? Wow. You had me. My bad. Listen dollface...ahem...can you answer a question for me? Clerk: Sure....what is it? NRO: When is it? Clerk: Are you serious? (she turns and sarcastically titls her head up to the huge neon sign flashing 1:15 a.m.) Well SUGAR it looks like its about a quarter after one. That's when. NRO: No, no, no.....you don't understand. I mean the date...is it....December 22nd, 1999? Clerk: Do I need to call the cops man? Your on crack or something right.? Meth? You on the tweeds? The toad? You are aren't you? you've been doing the toad? Did't you kids learn anything from Lando Griffin's death about doing toad? No you moron, it's April 9th, 2009. NRO: Really? Damn. Oh shit...Pledge... **As Osbourne runs out of the store Pledge is sitting on the hood of the Delorean laughing out loud. Only the delorean isn't a Delorean. It's Rob's Maserati. With a blown tire. Rob looks extremely confused.** Pledge: You bafoon. What did you have Chef Tony put in our food man? I feel aweful now and my hea dis killing me. I think you puked in your car. It reeks. NRO: Oh yeah....Chef Tony.....I gave him the code word for the "special" mushrooms that were smothering the steaks we had. Wow. So we didn't go back in time then? Pledge: No. But, ironically, you did have the info correct, I found it here on the phone again. One week. 10 years ago. That was hs last title reign and only other title reign in the CWF. NRO: And he mocks me? Piece of shit...oh snap... I wonder how Don Russo is doing.... Pledge: I called him. Apparently he was our Doc Brown. Trixie found him wandering around near the apartment shouting for Marty McFly! NRO: Well, don't get popped with any randoms, and if you do, I know a guy you can get clean piss from on the cheap. Filtered and everything. Pledge: TMI bro. Tow trucks on its way. What a night. What a night. **Scene fades as the tow truck pulls up. FTB** |
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