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| **The scene opens to find "The Nitemare" arriving at a private resort in Tallahassee. He looks to be in the mood to just soak in a hot tub, smoke a bowl, and do some reflecting. After a day full of events he has fought crime along side SpyderKyle as his altar ego, BatMare. He has taken out a gang of teenage bikers....twice. And to top it all off he now has no clue to as to how he should prepare for, or, who he will face , in his AIW in ring debut Saturday at Inception. He slides his key card in the cabana door and tosses his briefcase and duffel bag on an awaiting foyer chair. He strips clothes as he heads to the shower. After about a span of twenty or so minutes he steps out of the bathroom clad in nothing but a towel. Suddenly there is a wrap of knuckles at the door and he answers it. In walks Ira Huffingpaint in a very bad, and very bright Hawaiian shirt, khaki shorts, and open toed sandles. He has one of those straw Panama Jack hats on, you know the kind, the ones that scream "LOOK AT MY FAT WHITE GUT! YES, I AM A TOURIST!!!" He pulls his immitation gas station Ray Bans off as he smiles and steps into the foyer of Osbourne's cabana.** |
| IRA: Hey there Nitemare Robbie Rob, enjoying the beautiful Florida weather this fine evening? NRO: What do you want Huffingpaint? I was getting out of the shower and headed to the rec room. If this is about that hooker I set you up with in Jacksonville, hey man, sorry, I didn't know the chick was really a dude...honestly. (Grins sarcastically) IRA: Oh no, I still used the hour if you know what I mean! (Huffingpaint makes a motion with his index finger going in and out of an imaginary butthole on his fist) NRO: Oh God man, have you no dignity? IRA: None what so ever!!! I am actually here to give you a message from Mz. Danky. She knew we were staying at the same resort, so she faxed me a little something for you. Have a nice day!!! |
| **Huffingpaint hands Osbourne a manilla envelope and then walks off whistling the theme to Magnum PI. NRO walks back into the bathroom. He leans against the wall and reads the "message" from Mz. D. As he reads, the words appear on the screen and the Nitemare's voice is heard reading aloud {Like on Oprah}** |
| "Rob, If you are reading this, then your taste is indeed as flawed as Mr. Huffingpaint's. I just wanted to let you know that I am REALLY looking forward to your big return bout at Inception. I'm sure you won't let the fans down. While I realize you have expressed rather adamant tones with my staff about not knowing the identity of your opponent, I'm sure with your flawless talent and impecable in ring presence that it really won't matter....or will it? Who's in control now mother fucker? See you at Inception Mr. Osbourne!!! Mz. Danky" |
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| **Osbourne grits his teeth making a nasty grimace as he wads the paper in a ball with one fist. He tosses it into the toilet and slips into his deep purple speedo's. He takes a seat on the bed and packs a bowl in his small pipe and tucks it in a fold of his towel as heads off to the rec room where the hot tub is located. As he settles down in the jacuzzi he fires up the bowl and takes three or four hits. He disappears under the water for a split second, coming up with his well tanned body glistening with hot water. He leans back and closes his eyes and recounts the last few months of his career since returning to the sport that made the women love him and the men love to hate him. Suddenly the jacuzzi around him disappears and he is "floating" on a cloud of smoke. He looks down through the cloud into some sort of portal between the here and now and the past. The scene changes to the Nitemare's first match in the IoA. It was his first match in two years, and he laced the boots back up for this one match, and nothing more....** |
| �Crazy Train� by Ozzy Osbourne comes on the loud speaker system and out from the long tunnel comes Rob Osbourne with Don Russo beside him. He walks slowly down to the ring and looks over the table and all the weapons in the ring. Don Russo whispers something in his ear and Rob slides into the ring. He picks up a Singapore cane and motions for Z-Pac to come down to the ring. Don Russo heads back up the ramp and through the entrance way� Stone: There goes the leader of the family, Don Russo Nelson: What a wimp! Get your Italian ass back here! Stone: Here comes the three month Anarchy Champion, Z-Pac! �Human Pony Girl� by Samhain blares over the P.A. system and out from the tunnel walks Z-Pac with the Anarchy Championship on his shoulder. He looks at the huge crowd and then to the ring where Osbourne stands waiting for the champion. Z comes to the ring, walks up the stairs making sure not to take his eyes off Osbourne. He gets in as Rob goes to swing at Z� Stone: Osbourne swinging that big Singapore can right at the head of Z-Pac! NO! Z ducks him! Z kicks him in the ribs and could we see the ZDT this early? NO! Robby pushes Z into the ropes and hits a clothesline on the king of hardcore Nelson: You know these two have a gigantic history with one another dating back to their days in the Classic Wrestling Federation when Rob actual defeated Z-Pac! Stone: I don�t believe that Osbourne could beat Z� Well he could tonight� Back to the action! Z gets up quickly from that clothesline and here comes Z with a clothesline of his own! NO! Rob grabs him and hits a sit out full nelson slam! Nelson: That was quite a move, but when are we going to see the hardcore action? AW! Rob is climbing the turnbuckle trying to get a hold of that piece of glass dangling from the roof Stone: Z-Pac is up!! Here he comes and he pushes Rob off the top rope and on to one of those tables!! MY GOD THE CARNAGE! Crowd: IOA! IOA! IOA! Nelson: The crowd really liked that one� Stone: Yes they did as Rob is on the outside clutching himself in pain, but he�s up pretty quickly to one knee as Z-Pac comes to the apron and hits a Van-Terminator (feet out on a chair to the face of Osbourne)!! Robby is taking a beating early on in this match! Nelson: Remember that thing for Nintendo? Robby the Robot? Stone: Yeah so? Nelson: Good times� Stone: Back to the match� Rob is on the floor holding his face, while Z-Pac is up and ready to dish out even more of a beating with that chair! Rob is up turns around and is met with a chair shot to the head! BUT HE WON�T GO DOWN! Two shots! HE�S NOT GOING DOWN! Nelson: What does he have steel fucking skull? What the hell is going on? Stone: Rob grabs the chair before yet another chair shot and tosses it aside! He jumps on Z and dishes out some viscous blows to the head! He�s pounding Z-Pac demanding retribution for those shots! Nelson: Rob Osbourne has come alive and Z-Pac is busted open! His face is covered in blood! Stone: Osbourne is now walking to the entrance ramp way where a ladder is set up ready to be used in this match, he grabs it, but Z-Pac executes a dropkick into the ladder sending Osbourne to the ground! Z will not be denied in this match� Nelson: Well he�s kicking the shit out of Osbourne, as Z grabs the ladder and begins to pound the end of it into the chest of Rob sending his legs flailing about! Stone: Z tosses the ladder into the ring, and picks up the head of Osbourne! He tosses the �Nitemare� into the ring and it�s ladder battling time� Nelson: NRO is looking pretty good in this match up, but he can�t allow Z to toss him around this entire night! Stone: Well I think NRO just heard you as Z turned around Robby hit him with a right fist to the head, then a left, and then another right! Nitemare backs Z into the ropes and whips him across the ring, Z bounces off the ropes and Rob hits a Samoan Drop! Nelson: Rob is pouring it on! Come on Old School! Stone: Rob gets right back up and he�s waving for Z-Pac to get up, he wants him! He�s looking around at the ground and picks up the Singapore Cane he had earlier! CRACK! Right across the head of Z! Nelson: The blood is pouring from Z�s skull! He falls back, but he�s still on his feet, and another from Rob! Stone: There he goes� Now Rob is setting up the ladder in one of the corners, and is trying to climb up and reach one of those glass panels! If he gets that glass it�s going to get ugly� Nelson: Ugly� In here oh, in here oh, in here, we�re talking ugly, ugly� I ain�t country don�t get the wrong idea, my ego�s getting bigger with every song I hear� Stone: What is with you? Rob has the glass! Z�s is to a knee, and here comes Rob with the glass! HE�S GOING TO BREAK THAT OVER Z!! NO Z DUCKS! KICK TO THE MIDSECTION! ZDT! ZDT! ZDT! Nelson: This crowd is going nuts for the Unholy Alliance and Z-Pac! All Z needs to do is cover Rob and he�ll finally get his revenge!! Stone: Wait a second who�s that?! Up on the entrance way a man appears and he comes walking down to the ring� Nelson: I know him� That�s� That�s� MANIAC! Stone: Z doesn�t know what to do! He�s staring at Maniac waiting for him to come to the ring! All he needs to do is cover Rob and this match is over! Wait another minute! Rob with a small package!! 1.. 2.. NOOO!!! Nelson: My god that was a close call! Stone: He barely kicked out of that one! Z-Pac is up and he�s going to work on Rob for rolling him up! He stomps away at the Nitemare who barely can get up, but wait it�s now becoming a two on one as Maniac jumps into the ring and starts fighting it out with Z! Nelson: Rob is up and they both are giving Z a beating! Does his mean Maniac is a part of the Russo gang? What is going on here! Stone: Maniac holding Z by the arms as Rob gives him a wack with that Singapore cane, and now Rob is setting up the ladder in the middle of the ring going for the barbed wire� Nelson: I don�t think he�s going to get it this time� �The River Dragon Has Come� hits the loud speaker set� Stone: HE�S HERE! THE RIVER DRAGON CHRIS REINHARDT! From the tunnel runs Chris Reinhardt down to the ring, Rob is half up the ladder and Maniac is taking it to Z who lies on the ring ground� Stone: Reinhardt right to the ring, and he tosses Maniac to the outside with a couple of viscous shots, and grabs Rob Osbourne on the ladder! POWERBOMB from the ladder! Nelson: The River Dragon is taking it to Maniac and Rob! What is going on?! Has Reinhardt decided on who he�s joining?! Is he with The Unholy Alliance!? Stone: I don�t know, but he�s leaving this match up to Z-Pac as he leaves the ring and heads to make sure Maniac can�t come back in Nelson: What a match this has become! Stone: Z-Pac is climbing the ladder! He�s at the top and he�s got the barbed wire! WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING?! HE�S WRAPPING THE BARBED WIRE AROUND HIM! Nelson: This guy is fucking insane! Stone: He�s on the very top of the ladder wrapped in that barbed wire! 450 SPLASH ONTO ROB OSBOURNE! That�s got to be it! Nelson: Here�s a cover! 1.. 2.. NOO!!! Stone: MY GOD WHAT�S IT GOING TO TAKE TO KEEP NRO DOWN! Nelson: Z-Pac is flipping out! He�s taking the barbed wire and wrapping it around his fist! Stone: Oh god this is ugly! Blood is flying all over the place! And I�m talking about the wrestler! Nelson: Good one� But seriously folks this is one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen� Stone: Z-Pac sets a chair up in the middle of the ring, and whips Rob to the ropes Drop Toe Hold on the steel chair! Osbourne�s head just bounced off that chair� Oh man this isn�t good� Nelson: Can Osbourne survive this match? Stone: Z-Pac came to pick up Rob, but Osbourne is battling back once again! An elbow to the sternum of Z and he bounces off the ropes to hit a bulldog! He�s got the momentum back again! Nelson: Let�s see what he can do now! Stone: Rob is taking it to Z as he gets back up Osbourne hits a quick snap suplex making Z grab his back in pain, but Z is back up again! Nelson: Jesus Christ these two won�t give it up! Stone: Rob with a whip to the ropes, NO! Reversed, NO! Z-Pac pulls him in! ZDT! ZDT! Nelson: Here�s another cover! 1.. 2.. 3!! |
| NRO: Ah, the great and powerful Z. You know it's funny, I owe that sorry sack of shman shit a lot. The only reason I started wrestling again was to get in the ring with that prick. And in retrospect, I guess a big thank you should go to Captain America himself, Pledge Allegiance. (Hey jackass, if you're reading this moron, THAT is how you spell Allegiance) Afterall, if Mr. Red White and Gay hadn't begged me to go after Z for him since he couldn't get the job done himself, then I never would have sought out the Fudge Pac, and in hindsight wouldn't have gotten that sweet taste of warm blood in my mouth again, then I would have headed back to Aruba and still been on the beach right now. Much to Mz. D's sugrin, that just wasn't in the cards now was it? You know what they always say "Behind every good man is an even better woman." Well, that is not entirely true in all respects. Well, to a degree Iguess it is viable, but not the hands down truth. Just like the fact that woman can do things better than men. Another myth. God wasn't refered to as Her, but as Him. Plain and simple. Eve was nothing more than a spare rib that God experimented with. My foxy hot new arch nemesis has gotten herself into quite a predicament. I have my hunches on what lamb she is going to throw to the wolf, but nothing definite. I do know it has to be someone I know, or the man eating wildebeast wouldn't be keeping it a secret, now would she? But behind this woman seems to be some msytery man. If he is the strong, silent, supportive type, then his best bet is to keep his pencil pushing pansy ass behind the desk where it belongs. And he needs to put his woman in check, and that's on the for real. Ah, where did I make the wrong turn to blow it with that little Jezebel? Maybe I was a little to indirect when i whispered in her ear in our initial talks that I thought her dress would look nice in a wrinkled heap next to my bed. I thought her odd look was suprise that i would be interested in a hose beast like herself. But when she slapped me after I aksed if she wanted to lick my balls, I knew she was going to take a little extra work. But now we all find out that she's married. Damn. Hottest bitch in the company nd she's taken. And to think all this time I just thought she had been playing hard to get. But I guess this weekend, I'll have to set her heart on fire for a real man. Maybe then she'll realize that whoever that assclown she wraps those hot legs around at night is half the man I am, she'll come to her senses at , as the great Tony Mullins used to say "Take a ride space mountain!!!!" |
| **Osbourne giggles and hits his hash pipe as the scene fades to a commercial break for this week's hot TV Guide Sunday Telegraph magazine cover that features an in depth with AIW CEO Mz. Danky, and AIW financial backer and superstar "The Nitemare" Rob Osbourne.** |
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