Reflections on
"Simple Abundance"
May ~ Days 24-31
MAY 24 ~ The Fullness of Nothing
"Since we cannot change reality, let us change the eyes which see reality." (Nikos Kazantzakis)
As we go thru life, we sometimes become blinded by such a profusion of THINGS, that little by little we become anxiety ridden and edgy by too many things tripping us and demanding our time to pay for them and to care for them. The Japanese culture is well aware of the 'space' between items being just as important in balance and design as the space that is occupied. In the western culture, we may think of an area that has nothing in it as "empty". In reality, our subconscious keeps track of the space it sees, and can become quite agitated by lack of any visible space. Strive to have some surface areas free for the eye to glide over easily when you enter a room, if possible.
One exercise to see if we really are enjoying the things around us, or if they are just stacking up and cluttering our lives, is to remove the decorations from a room, and live in it for a few days void of decorations. Only return those things that you find you miss seeing and are really important to you. Try to make sure that you have 'open' spaces in your home, as they send messages to your subconscious of not being closed in and a feeling of spaciousness.
Be selective: This is your home and you should not rush to 'get it done'.
Be kind: to your budget and to your authentic self by giving yourself time to create your home and time to fit it all in your budget.
Be cautious: about spending sprees where you buy 'things' that you see that all look so cute, rather than having an empty spot and seeing something that would be perfect 'right there in that spot'.
Be willing to wait: for the sales - as most items are permanent stock and will not disappear if you don't buy it right now.
MAY 25 ~ On Passion
What is passion? It is surely the becoming of a person" (John Boorman)
It's quite possible that some may have a miscoception about the word "passion/passionate". Thinking only of love trist and doing things without thinking, regardless of the consequences.
In fact, consider the many wonderful things that have come about by a passionate outlook that were not under the heading of love and recklessness. Albert Einstein once said, "I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious." Does that give you any lite bulb moments on how passion could work for any of us, if it were applied to our lives and our thinking about what we are doing in our homes?
I think the realness of life can only be fully appreciated if you are passionate about it. Being passionate about anything is to sincerely care enough about it, to invest your time and effort into it. It is the opposite of 'taking things for granted'. Knowing that life doesn't work like a fairy tale, and not giving up when things go wrong, but knowing that you are in it for the long run, and having an unshakeable belief that what you are doing is vital. Too many people are taking the things that make up their life under the context of 'the mundane', never realizing the oppotunities they are endowed with in setting moods and creating an atmosphere of peace in the home, and how that will in turn, affect the live/s of any living there, snowballing into attitudes, self confidence, affecting any relationship with school, job, community - showing that the act of nurturing your home is one of building the foundation from which our lives are actually grown.
To love your home, is to love yourself. Whether you are expressing yourself in your kitchen or one of the many other areas, or outside in the garden, let it be a passion with you to create your home with joy.
MAY 26 ~ Passion as your Decorator
In this reading Sarah makes a correlation between how creating your home is like writing a book. You cannot sit down in one day and write a book and neither can you expect to create your home in one day. It must be created over time with love and caring and as you grow your home will go thru much 'editing and revisions'. Don't look for the quick gratification of having your 'house all done' as that will soon enough pass as you change over time, requiring more 'editing'! So be willing to take your time as you do it. Look to be in tune with your life and the changes in it, and how your home will be used and reflect what goes on there.
We first begin to create our home with a vague notion perhaps, of here I am, so it must automatically be home. I will share a story from my high school days with you. I always was in love with the idea of one day having my own home and creating it. I signed up for all the home-ec classes and my counselor called me in and talked very sternly with me, "now you need to drop these and study typing and shorthand. Sure you will be just fine if your marriage and everything works out, but what if he leaves you or dies?!" I can't fault her for expanding my education. On the other hand, I found myself a newly wed and not understanding how to take care of my home and my new responsibilities.....and having the horrifying realization hit me, "Oh my Gawd! What if my husband LIVES! I'm only prepared for life if he should leave or die!" That was a shocking discovery, that I who had always wanted and longed for my home to love, was totally unprepared to create it! And that I who adored my husband was only prepared for how to live if he left me or died!
I had a lot of 'learning it the hardway' with no clear cut lesson or help. Now at age 49, and with my health problems, I still am creating it, loving it, and editing it.
"The famous interior decorator Elsie de Wolfe admitted, "I can't paint. I can't write. I can't sing. But I can decorate and run a house, and light it, and heat it, and have it like a LIVING thing..." "With passion as your authentic decorator, every room in your home can tell a riveting tale about the extraordinary woman who graces it with her presence."
*Please understand that I am not saying you must have a husband and/or kids to have a home. That is not the point at all. All of these insights will apply to your home that you are creating regardless of how many people live there. A home is a home to who lives there, I am only sharing my experiences in my own home and life, because they are my authentic experiences, the stories from my own life.
MAY 27 ~ Interior vision inventory
"We shape our dwellings, and afterwards our dwellings shape us". (Winston Churchill)
Consider yourself an artist, one of the greats! Your home is your blank canvas, your lump of clay, your empty score sheet, waiting for the notes that will create the song!.....and so are you.....
Think of all the great works of art that are known in the world, most of them took a very long time to complete...some a lifetime. I suggest to you that your life is that work of art and it will take your entire lifetime to complete it! It is like a mystery unfolding....first you are the painter, applying the colors and creating the art.....then you are the piece of art itself, pulling forth those colors and living thru them. Ladies, there is no doubt, it is a two way street. In more common everyday lingo...."what goes around comes around". What you create, will create you in the end.
Be passionate about your work, your play, and your love, don't let your life dribble away unnoticed by you, wrongly taking for granted the importance of homecaring and self-caring.
May 28 ~ By Love Possessed
Your home...your creation....your possessions.
Creating your home / living in your home....
and how to find the 'middle ground' ???
We love our home, we invest our time and effort in it....let's be of clear mind about what we are doing and what we are not doing. We are not gathering as many treasures as we can stack up so we can 'have the most' and 'beat the Jones'....are we? It may be hard when we get into homecrafting to not just be caught up in buying and obtaining for the sake of 'having'.
When we create a home, we are creating the atmosphere to live in, and it is important what the message is. We all want to convey peace, comfort, nurturing to those who enter. Certainly we are going to be purchasing new and old items to feather our nest and nothing's wrong with that. But, I will caution you against getting your house so made up that your own family cannot move without getting into hot water.
Some have homes for just one (themselves) or have older children -so don't have as many decorating restrictions. In that case, they may need to think a little if someone is dropping by with a child. Put Grandma's special vase away, don't rattle everyone's nerves by making the focus of their visit on watching the vase and glaring at the child. On the other hand, it is true that some people's kids will tear the walls down, -meet those people out for lunch, at the park, at the library, at THEIR house! Don't believe that your home is an open toy box to be smashed in a 'free for all' and if you don't go along, you are too concerned over your possessions.
I actually knew someone who would bring her children to my house and sit and watch them turn over my lamps and say "see what I have to put up with?" What I saw was someone not teaching their children respect. I do declare that the person who visited me actually emitted feelings of triumph when her children broke something of mine. I quit inviting them here, realizing it was a 'test' to see if I would say something, then she would gloatingly tell me I was a bad person because I put things before people. :(
There is a middle ground to be found. You should be willing to put away the obvious, but that does not translate into watching someone destroy your home while you say nothing. This has always been a confusing roll for many a person concerning behavior in the home....finding the middle ground between obsessiveness and rightly not going along with watching someone make shreds out of your home.
There are two sides to this coin, ladies. One is not putting possessions before people, the other is not allowing people to destroy your own work and home because they don't respect it. A person working in an office would certainly know how much effort and time had been wasted if someone walked into their office and dumped their paper files on the floor. When someone trashes your home, they have done the same, and shown the same lack of respect for your labor and effort.
You must take a lesson from each side of the coin if you will be a balanced individual. Put up what is doomed to be broken if you leave it there, and expect respect from those who enter your home by not agreeing to them 'running wild'. If they enter your home with an 'anthing goes' attitude, anything that's broken is not a mistake, it was the NATURAL course of their behavior. On the other hand, if a guest at your home should make a true mistake resulting in some breakage, they are going to feel badly and quite possibly humiliated. You should show graciousness, and remember to put that person before the item, replacing their embarrassment with reassurance and calmness.
Create your home with gladness and be thankful for the things around you that speak to you and cheer you. Respect your surroundings and expect the same from others. Do not imagine these items are your happiness, but an expression of it.
I will leave you with this poem that was found written on a tombstone:
"Write it down, when I have perished:
Here is everything I've cherished;
That these walls should glow with beauty
Spurred my lagging soul to duty;
That there should be gladness here
Kept me toiling, year by year...
Every thought and every act
Were to keep this home intact."
May 29 ~ Favorite things / Collections
What do you collect? I find the things I collect remind of some special time in my life....perhaps a special moment or special feeling. Things that help me see / smell / feel that moment again in a more clear way....as if to relive it.
When I look at the little millie & willie penguin salt and pepper shakers on my kitchen shelf, I remember visiting my maternal grandmother and often playing with a set just like them. The old pine cones with artificial snow and glitter, attached to red ribbon streamers, are just like the ones my mother put on our door at Christmas time when I was a child. Little things thru out my home, spark memories of warmth and joy when my eyes fall on them.
But, there are other memories ....memories not mine, memories I longed for. Items that when I look at them, I think of a lifestyle or time in history, or some golden moment that I didn't experience, but somehow is a part of me ....I suppose I'm borrowing someone's memories .....antique quilt tops, old blue and white dishes, 7 ladie's compacts with various compartments for powder, lipstick, and mad-money change, old floral hankies...
Sometimes it's not about trying to buy everyone you see, just a representation of something, some feeling in your mind that you are in tune with and want to feel its presence in your life in a stronger way.
If we spend money redecorating and look for whatever is "in", we may not feel a closeness to our own homes. Make sure any collecting you do fits your budget and speaks to your inner woman, and they will not become tiresome after a short time.
May 30 ~ The Fun of Foraging
Perhaps you feel a little in despair, because your finances are very tight, and you've never had the extra money to buy something for your home. Take heart! There is much to be found at auctions, yardsales, and thrift stores. You can find items for every need - clothes, kitchen glasses, holiday decorations, books, sweet nostalgic items (don't be too proud to buy something not perfect, as the lady on the program Shabby Chic spends all her time looking for things that are not perfect for her own home!). Check clothes for holes or stains. Depending on the cost and how I would be using it, I have knowingly bought clothes with minor problems. If electrical, check at a plug before purchasing.
My mother and I recently went on a trip to the local thrift store and I found several items to my liking and suiting my budget, which is very tight right now. Not only did I feel a satisfaction from finding bargains and saving money for my family, but I also felt a different kind of satisfaction when I turned the corner at the shop and saw something I had donated the week before!
Be willing to give what you can't use, as other's have already done for you, and the circle will continue!
May31 ~ A Touch of Whimsey
"Oh, the fun of arriving at a house and feeling the spark that tells you that you are going to have a good time." (Mark Hampton)
Do you add touches of whimsey to your surroundings? I know some of the pages you see in decorating books look so perfect....maybe too perfect....like a stage that was dressed for the occassion, instead of a place where people actually have spent the times of their lives. Don't be so convinced that everything has to stay completely in the same mode, that you are afraid to include things that give you pleasure, because they are not in the same style as the rest of the room. Sometimes it is the unexpected that we enjoy the most.
Many times in quilts, the pattern and colors will go along all the same, matching completely, and then they will pull out one they call a 'zinger' - it is a bright color that people would not have thought of, to add into the block in some small piece and the result is the difference between being a uniform quilt vs being spellbinding!
If you have some momento of your childhood or something you picked up, go ahead and put it out, just to enjoy it everyday. In my old kitchen cabinet, where I have many blue and white dishes, sitting in front of them are 3 little cups and saucers of no particular pattern....they are the ones I bought for 5 cents a piece and played with as a child. Please keep special momentos out of reach of children to save your nerves and theirs! I had a friend who once used an old wooden potty chair with a tray, and sat it in her bathroom with a big teddy bear sitting on it the tray helped keep him sitting on it straight, it was really darling to see, and everyone who saw it wanted one!
Anyway, point is - have fun decorating, don't be totally serious!
Read to June 1-7
*In order to understand the full context of these reflections, you will enjoy your own copy of the Sarah Ban Breathnach book:
"Simple Abundance ~ A Daybook of Comfort and joy"
Sarah's Website ~ ENJOY!: www.simpleabundance.com
Uploaded June 15, 2001
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED-COPYRIGHT 2001
This page hosted by 
Get your own Free Home Page
MAY 24 ~ The Fullness of Nothing
"Since we cannot change reality, let us change the eyes which see reality." (Nikos Kazantzakis)
As we go thru life, we sometimes become blinded by such a profusion of THINGS, that little by little we become anxiety ridden and edgy by too many things tripping us and demanding our time to pay for them and to care for them. The Japanese culture is well aware of the 'space' between items being just as important in balance and design as the space that is occupied. In the western culture, we may think of an area that has nothing in it as "empty". In reality, our subconscious keeps track of the space it sees, and can become quite agitated by lack of any visible space. Strive to have some surface areas free for the eye to glide over easily when you enter a room, if possible.
One exercise to see if we really are enjoying the things around us, or if they are just stacking up and cluttering our lives, is to remove the decorations from a room, and live in it for a few days void of decorations. Only return those things that you find you miss seeing and are really important to you. Try to make sure that you have 'open' spaces in your home, as they send messages to your subconscious of not being closed in and a feeling of spaciousness.
Be selective: This is your home and you should not rush to 'get it done'.
Be kind: to your budget and to your authentic self by giving yourself time to create your home and time to fit it all in your budget.
Be cautious: about spending sprees where you buy 'things' that you see that all look so cute, rather than having an empty spot and seeing something that would be perfect 'right there in that spot'.
Be willing to wait: for the sales - as most items are permanent stock and will not disappear if you don't buy it right now.
MAY 25 ~ On Passion
What is passion? It is surely the becoming of a person" (John Boorman)
It's quite possible that some may have a miscoception about the word "passion/passionate". Thinking only of love trist and doing things without thinking, regardless of the consequences.
In fact, consider the many wonderful things that have come about by a passionate outlook that were not under the heading of love and recklessness. Albert Einstein once said, "I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious." Does that give you any lite bulb moments on how passion could work for any of us, if it were applied to our lives and our thinking about what we are doing in our homes?
I think the realness of life can only be fully appreciated if you are passionate about it. Being passionate about anything is to sincerely care enough about it, to invest your time and effort into it. It is the opposite of 'taking things for granted'. Knowing that life doesn't work like a fairy tale, and not giving up when things go wrong, but knowing that you are in it for the long run, and having an unshakeable belief that what you are doing is vital. Too many people are taking the things that make up their life under the context of 'the mundane', never realizing the oppotunities they are endowed with in setting moods and creating an atmosphere of peace in the home, and how that will in turn, affect the live/s of any living there, snowballing into attitudes, self confidence, affecting any relationship with school, job, community - showing that the act of nurturing your home is one of building the foundation from which our lives are actually grown.
To love your home, is to love yourself. Whether you are expressing yourself in your kitchen or one of the many other areas, or outside in the garden, let it be a passion with you to create your home with joy.
MAY 26 ~ Passion as your Decorator
In this reading Sarah makes a correlation between how creating your home is like writing a book. You cannot sit down in one day and write a book and neither can you expect to create your home in one day. It must be created over time with love and caring and as you grow your home will go thru much 'editing and revisions'. Don't look for the quick gratification of having your 'house all done' as that will soon enough pass as you change over time, requiring more 'editing'! So be willing to take your time as you do it. Look to be in tune with your life and the changes in it, and how your home will be used and reflect what goes on there.
We first begin to create our home with a vague notion perhaps, of here I am, so it must automatically be home. I will share a story from my high school days with you. I always was in love with the idea of one day having my own home and creating it. I signed up for all the home-ec classes and my counselor called me in and talked very sternly with me, "now you need to drop these and study typing and shorthand. Sure you will be just fine if your marriage and everything works out, but what if he leaves you or dies?!" I can't fault her for expanding my education. On the other hand, I found myself a newly wed and not understanding how to take care of my home and my new responsibilities.....and having the horrifying realization hit me, "Oh my Gawd! What if my husband LIVES! I'm only prepared for life if he should leave or die!" That was a shocking discovery, that I who had always wanted and longed for my home to love, was totally unprepared to create it! And that I who adored my husband was only prepared for how to live if he left me or died!
I had a lot of 'learning it the hardway' with no clear cut lesson or help. Now at age 49, and with my health problems, I still am creating it, loving it, and editing it.
"The famous interior decorator Elsie de Wolfe admitted, "I can't paint. I can't write. I can't sing. But I can decorate and run a house, and light it, and heat it, and have it like a LIVING thing..." "With passion as your authentic decorator, every room in your home can tell a riveting tale about the extraordinary woman who graces it with her presence."
*Please understand that I am not saying you must have a husband and/or kids to have a home. That is not the point at all. All of these insights will apply to your home that you are creating regardless of how many people live there. A home is a home to who lives there, I am only sharing my experiences in my own home and life, because they are my authentic experiences, the stories from my own life.
MAY 27 ~ Interior vision inventory
"We shape our dwellings, and afterwards our dwellings shape us". (Winston Churchill)
Consider yourself an artist, one of the greats! Your home is your blank canvas, your lump of clay, your empty score sheet, waiting for the notes that will create the song!.....and so are you.....
Think of all the great works of art that are known in the world, most of them took a very long time to complete...some a lifetime. I suggest to you that your life is that work of art and it will take your entire lifetime to complete it! It is like a mystery unfolding....first you are the painter, applying the colors and creating the art.....then you are the piece of art itself, pulling forth those colors and living thru them. Ladies, there is no doubt, it is a two way street. In more common everyday lingo...."what goes around comes around". What you create, will create you in the end.
Be passionate about your work, your play, and your love, don't let your life dribble away unnoticed by you, wrongly taking for granted the importance of homecaring and self-caring.
May 28 ~ By Love Possessed
Your home...your creation....your possessions.
Creating your home / living in your home....
and how to find the 'middle ground' ???
We love our home, we invest our time and effort in it....let's be of clear mind about what we are doing and what we are not doing. We are not gathering as many treasures as we can stack up so we can 'have the most' and 'beat the Jones'....are we? It may be hard when we get into homecrafting to not just be caught up in buying and obtaining for the sake of 'having'.
When we create a home, we are creating the atmosphere to live in, and it is important what the message is. We all want to convey peace, comfort, nurturing to those who enter. Certainly we are going to be purchasing new and old items to feather our nest and nothing's wrong with that. But, I will caution you against getting your house so made up that your own family cannot move without getting into hot water.
Some have homes for just one (themselves) or have older children -so don't have as many decorating restrictions. In that case, they may need to think a little if someone is dropping by with a child. Put Grandma's special vase away, don't rattle everyone's nerves by making the focus of their visit on watching the vase and glaring at the child. On the other hand, it is true that some people's kids will tear the walls down, -meet those people out for lunch, at the park, at the library, at THEIR house! Don't believe that your home is an open toy box to be smashed in a 'free for all' and if you don't go along, you are too concerned over your possessions.
I actually knew someone who would bring her children to my house and sit and watch them turn over my lamps and say "see what I have to put up with?" What I saw was someone not teaching their children respect. I do declare that the person who visited me actually emitted feelings of triumph when her children broke something of mine. I quit inviting them here, realizing it was a 'test' to see if I would say something, then she would gloatingly tell me I was a bad person because I put things before people. :(
There is a middle ground to be found. You should be willing to put away the obvious, but that does not translate into watching someone destroy your home while you say nothing. This has always been a confusing roll for many a person concerning behavior in the home....finding the middle ground between obsessiveness and rightly not going along with watching someone make shreds out of your home.
There are two sides to this coin, ladies. One is not putting possessions before people, the other is not allowing people to destroy your own work and home because they don't respect it. A person working in an office would certainly know how much effort and time had been wasted if someone walked into their office and dumped their paper files on the floor. When someone trashes your home, they have done the same, and shown the same lack of respect for your labor and effort.
You must take a lesson from each side of the coin if you will be a balanced individual. Put up what is doomed to be broken if you leave it there, and expect respect from those who enter your home by not agreeing to them 'running wild'. If they enter your home with an 'anthing goes' attitude, anything that's broken is not a mistake, it was the NATURAL course of their behavior. On the other hand, if a guest at your home should make a true mistake resulting in some breakage, they are going to feel badly and quite possibly humiliated. You should show graciousness, and remember to put that person before the item, replacing their embarrassment with reassurance and calmness.
Create your home with gladness and be thankful for the things around you that speak to you and cheer you. Respect your surroundings and expect the same from others. Do not imagine these items are your happiness, but an expression of it.
I will leave you with this poem that was found written on a tombstone:
"Write it down, when I have perished:
Here is everything I've cherished;
That these walls should glow with beauty
Spurred my lagging soul to duty;
That there should be gladness here
Kept me toiling, year by year...
Every thought and every act
Were to keep this home intact."
May 29 ~ Favorite things / Collections
What do you collect? I find the things I collect remind of some special time in my life....perhaps a special moment or special feeling. Things that help me see / smell / feel that moment again in a more clear way....as if to relive it.
When I look at the little millie & willie penguin salt and pepper shakers on my kitchen shelf, I remember visiting my maternal grandmother and often playing with a set just like them. The old pine cones with artificial snow and glitter, attached to red ribbon streamers, are just like the ones my mother put on our door at Christmas time when I was a child. Little things thru out my home, spark memories of warmth and joy when my eyes fall on them.
But, there are other memories ....memories not mine, memories I longed for. Items that when I look at them, I think of a lifestyle or time in history, or some golden moment that I didn't experience, but somehow is a part of me ....I suppose I'm borrowing someone's memories .....antique quilt tops, old blue and white dishes, 7 ladie's compacts with various compartments for powder, lipstick, and mad-money change, old floral hankies...
Sometimes it's not about trying to buy everyone you see, just a representation of something, some feeling in your mind that you are in tune with and want to feel its presence in your life in a stronger way.
If we spend money redecorating and look for whatever is "in", we may not feel a closeness to our own homes. Make sure any collecting you do fits your budget and speaks to your inner woman, and they will not become tiresome after a short time.
May 30 ~ The Fun of Foraging
Perhaps you feel a little in despair, because your finances are very tight, and you've never had the extra money to buy something for your home. Take heart! There is much to be found at auctions, yardsales, and thrift stores. You can find items for every need - clothes, kitchen glasses, holiday decorations, books, sweet nostalgic items (don't be too proud to buy something not perfect, as the lady on the program Shabby Chic spends all her time looking for things that are not perfect for her own home!). Check clothes for holes or stains. Depending on the cost and how I would be using it, I have knowingly bought clothes with minor problems. If electrical, check at a plug before purchasing.
My mother and I recently went on a trip to the local thrift store and I found several items to my liking and suiting my budget, which is very tight right now. Not only did I feel a satisfaction from finding bargains and saving money for my family, but I also felt a different kind of satisfaction when I turned the corner at the shop and saw something I had donated the week before!
Be willing to give what you can't use, as other's have already done for you, and the circle will continue!
May31 ~ A Touch of Whimsey
"Oh, the fun of arriving at a house and feeling the spark that tells you that you are going to have a good time." (Mark Hampton)
Do you add touches of whimsey to your surroundings? I know some of the pages you see in decorating books look so perfect....maybe too perfect....like a stage that was dressed for the occassion, instead of a place where people actually have spent the times of their lives. Don't be so convinced that everything has to stay completely in the same mode, that you are afraid to include things that give you pleasure, because they are not in the same style as the rest of the room. Sometimes it is the unexpected that we enjoy the most.
Many times in quilts, the pattern and colors will go along all the same, matching completely, and then they will pull out one they call a 'zinger' - it is a bright color that people would not have thought of, to add into the block in some small piece and the result is the difference between being a uniform quilt vs being spellbinding!
If you have some momento of your childhood or something you picked up, go ahead and put it out, just to enjoy it everyday. In my old kitchen cabinet, where I have many blue and white dishes, sitting in front of them are 3 little cups and saucers of no particular pattern....they are the ones I bought for 5 cents a piece and played with as a child. Please keep special momentos out of reach of children to save your nerves and theirs! I had a friend who once used an old wooden potty chair with a tray, and sat it in her bathroom with a big teddy bear sitting on it the tray helped keep him sitting on it straight, it was really darling to see, and everyone who saw it wanted one!
Anyway, point is - have fun decorating, don't be totally serious!
Read to June 1-7
*In order to understand the full context of these reflections, you will enjoy your own copy of the Sarah Ban Breathnach book:
"Simple Abundance ~ A Daybook of Comfort and joy"
Sarah's Website ~ ENJOY!: www.simpleabundance.com
Uploaded June 15, 2001
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED-COPYRIGHT 2001
This page hosted by
Get your own Free Home Page
"Since we cannot change reality, let us change the eyes which see reality." (Nikos Kazantzakis)
As we go thru life, we sometimes become blinded by such a profusion of THINGS, that little by little we become anxiety ridden and edgy by too many things tripping us and demanding our time to pay for them and to care for them. The Japanese culture is well aware of the 'space' between items being just as important in balance and design as the space that is occupied. In the western culture, we may think of an area that has nothing in it as "empty". In reality, our subconscious keeps track of the space it sees, and can become quite agitated by lack of any visible space. Strive to have some surface areas free for the eye to glide over easily when you enter a room, if possible.
One exercise to see if we really are enjoying the things around us, or if they are just stacking up and cluttering our lives, is to remove the decorations from a room, and live in it for a few days void of decorations. Only return those things that you find you miss seeing and are really important to you. Try to make sure that you have 'open' spaces in your home, as they send messages to your subconscious of not being closed in and a feeling of spaciousness.
Be selective: This is your home and you should not rush to 'get it done'.
Be kind: to your budget and to your authentic self by giving yourself time to create your home and time to fit it all in your budget.
Be cautious: about spending sprees where you buy 'things' that you see that all look so cute, rather than having an empty spot and seeing something that would be perfect 'right there in that spot'.
Be willing to wait: for the sales - as most items are permanent stock and will not disappear if you don't buy it right now.
MAY 25 ~ On Passion
What is passion? It is surely the becoming of a person" (John Boorman)
It's quite possible that some may have a miscoception about the word "passion/passionate". Thinking only of love trist and doing things without thinking, regardless of the consequences. In fact, consider the many wonderful things that have come about by a passionate outlook that were not under the heading of love and recklessness. Albert Einstein once said, "I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious." Does that give you any lite bulb moments on how passion could work for any of us, if it were applied to our lives and our thinking about what we are doing in our homes?
I think the realness of life can only be fully appreciated if you are passionate about it. Being passionate about anything is to sincerely care enough about it, to invest your time and effort into it. It is the opposite of 'taking things for granted'. Knowing that life doesn't work like a fairy tale, and not giving up when things go wrong, but knowing that you are in it for the long run, and having an unshakeable belief that what you are doing is vital. Too many people are taking the things that make up their life under the context of 'the mundane', never realizing the oppotunities they are endowed with in setting moods and creating an atmosphere of peace in the home, and how that will in turn, affect the live/s of any living there, snowballing into attitudes, self confidence, affecting any relationship with school, job, community - showing that the act of nurturing your home is one of building the foundation from which our lives are actually grown.
To love your home, is to love yourself. Whether you are expressing yourself in your kitchen or one of the many other areas, or outside in the garden, let it be a passion with you to create your home with joy.
MAY 26 ~ Passion as your Decorator
In this reading Sarah makes a correlation between how creating your home is like writing a book. You cannot sit down in one day and write a book and neither can you expect to create your home in one day. It must be created over time with love and caring and as you grow your home will go thru much 'editing and revisions'. Don't look for the quick gratification of having your 'house all done' as that will soon enough pass as you change over time, requiring more 'editing'! So be willing to take your time as you do it. Look to be in tune with your life and the changes in it, and how your home will be used and reflect what goes on there.
We first begin to create our home with a vague notion perhaps, of here I am, so it must automatically be home. I will share a story from my high school days with you. I always was in love with the idea of one day having my own home and creating it. I signed up for all the home-ec classes and my counselor called me in and talked very sternly with me, "now you need to drop these and study typing and shorthand. Sure you will be just fine if your marriage and everything works out, but what if he leaves you or dies?!" I can't fault her for expanding my education. On the other hand, I found myself a newly wed and not understanding how to take care of my home and my new responsibilities.....and having the horrifying realization hit me, "Oh my Gawd! What if my husband LIVES! I'm only prepared for life if he should leave or die!" That was a shocking discovery, that I who had always wanted and longed for my home to love, was totally unprepared to create it! And that I who adored my husband was only prepared for how to live if he left me or died!
I had a lot of 'learning it the hardway' with no clear cut lesson or help. Now at age 49, and with my health problems, I still am creating it, loving it, and editing it.
"The famous interior decorator Elsie de Wolfe admitted, "I can't paint. I can't write. I can't sing. But I can decorate and run a house, and light it, and heat it, and have it like a LIVING thing..." "With passion as your authentic decorator, every room in your home can tell a riveting tale about the extraordinary woman who graces it with her presence."
*Please understand that I am not saying you must have a husband and/or kids to have a home. That is not the point at all. All of these insights will apply to your home that you are creating regardless of how many people live there. A home is a home to who lives there, I am only sharing my experiences in my own home and life, because they are my authentic experiences, the stories from my own life.
MAY 27 ~ Interior vision inventory
"We shape our dwellings, and afterwards our dwellings shape us". (Winston Churchill)
Consider yourself an artist, one of the greats! Your home is your blank canvas, your lump of clay, your empty score sheet, waiting for the notes that will create the song!.....and so are you.....
Think of all the great works of art that are known in the world, most of them took a very long time to complete...some a lifetime. I suggest to you that your life is that work of art and it will take your entire lifetime to complete it! It is like a mystery unfolding....first you are the painter, applying the colors and creating the art.....then you are the piece of art itself, pulling forth those colors and living thru them. Ladies, there is no doubt, it is a two way street. In more common everyday lingo...."what goes around comes around". What you create, will create you in the end.
Be passionate about your work, your play, and your love, don't let your life dribble away unnoticed by you, wrongly taking for granted the importance of homecaring and self-caring.
May 28 ~ By Love Possessed
Your home...your creation....your possessions.
Creating your home / living in your home....
and how to find the 'middle ground' ???
We love our home, we invest our time and effort in it....let's be of clear mind about what we are doing and what we are not doing. We are not gathering as many treasures as we can stack up so we can 'have the most' and 'beat the Jones'....are we? It may be hard when we get into homecrafting to not just be caught up in buying and obtaining for the sake of 'having'.
When we create a home, we are creating the atmosphere to live in, and it is important what the message is. We all want to convey peace, comfort, nurturing to those who enter. Certainly we are going to be purchasing new and old items to feather our nest and nothing's wrong with that. But, I will caution you against getting your house so made up that your own family cannot move without getting into hot water.
Some have homes for just one (themselves) or have older children -so don't have as many decorating restrictions. In that case, they may need to think a little if someone is dropping by with a child. Put Grandma's special vase away, don't rattle everyone's nerves by making the focus of their visit on watching the vase and glaring at the child. On the other hand, it is true that some people's kids will tear the walls down, -meet those people out for lunch, at the park, at the library, at THEIR house! Don't believe that your home is an open toy box to be smashed in a 'free for all' and if you don't go along, you are too concerned over your possessions.
I actually knew someone who would bring her children to my house and sit and watch them turn over my lamps and say "see what I have to put up with?" What I saw was someone not teaching their children respect. I do declare that the person who visited me actually emitted feelings of triumph when her children broke something of mine. I quit inviting them here, realizing it was a 'test' to see if I would say something, then she would gloatingly tell me I was a bad person because I put things before people. :(
There is a middle ground to be found. You should be willing to put away the obvious, but that does not translate into watching someone destroy your home while you say nothing. This has always been a confusing roll for many a person concerning behavior in the home....finding the middle ground between obsessiveness and rightly not going along with watching someone make shreds out of your home.
There are two sides to this coin, ladies. One is not putting possessions before people, the other is not allowing people to destroy your own work and home because they don't respect it. A person working in an office would certainly know how much effort and time had been wasted if someone walked into their office and dumped their paper files on the floor. When someone trashes your home, they have done the same, and shown the same lack of respect for your labor and effort.
You must take a lesson from each side of the coin if you will be a balanced individual. Put up what is doomed to be broken if you leave it there, and expect respect from those who enter your home by not agreeing to them 'running wild'. If they enter your home with an 'anthing goes' attitude, anything that's broken is not a mistake, it was the NATURAL course of their behavior. On the other hand, if a guest at your home should make a true mistake resulting in some breakage, they are going to feel badly and quite possibly humiliated. You should show graciousness, and remember to put that person before the item, replacing their embarrassment with reassurance and calmness.
Create your home with gladness and be thankful for the things around you that speak to you and cheer you. Respect your surroundings and expect the same from others. Do not imagine these items are your happiness, but an expression of it.
I will leave you with this poem that was found written on a tombstone:
"Write it down, when I have perished:
Here is everything I've cherished;
That these walls should glow with beauty
Spurred my lagging soul to duty;
That there should be gladness here
Kept me toiling, year by year...
Every thought and every act
Were to keep this home intact."
May 29 ~ Favorite things / Collections
What do you collect? I find the things I collect remind of some special time in my life....perhaps a special moment or special feeling. Things that help me see / smell / feel that moment again in a more clear way....as if to relive it.
When I look at the little millie & willie penguin salt and pepper shakers on my kitchen shelf, I remember visiting my maternal grandmother and often playing with a set just like them. The old pine cones with artificial snow and glitter, attached to red ribbon streamers, are just like the ones my mother put on our door at Christmas time when I was a child. Little things thru out my home, spark memories of warmth and joy when my eyes fall on them.
But, there are other memories ....memories not mine, memories I longed for. Items that when I look at them, I think of a lifestyle or time in history, or some golden moment that I didn't experience, but somehow is a part of me ....I suppose I'm borrowing someone's memories .....antique quilt tops, old blue and white dishes, 7 ladie's compacts with various compartments for powder, lipstick, and mad-money change, old floral hankies...
Sometimes it's not about trying to buy everyone you see, just a representation of something, some feeling in your mind that you are in tune with and want to feel its presence in your life in a stronger way.
If we spend money redecorating and look for whatever is "in", we may not feel a closeness to our own homes. Make sure any collecting you do fits your budget and speaks to your inner woman, and they will not become tiresome after a short time.
May 30 ~ The Fun of Foraging
Perhaps you feel a little in despair, because your finances are very tight, and you've never had the extra money to buy something for your home. Take heart! There is much to be found at auctions, yardsales, and thrift stores. You can find items for every need - clothes, kitchen glasses, holiday decorations, books, sweet nostalgic items (don't be too proud to buy something not perfect, as the lady on the program Shabby Chic spends all her time looking for things that are not perfect for her own home!). Check clothes for holes or stains. Depending on the cost and how I would be using it, I have knowingly bought clothes with minor problems. If electrical, check at a plug before purchasing.
My mother and I recently went on a trip to the local thrift store and I found several items to my liking and suiting my budget, which is very tight right now. Not only did I feel a satisfaction from finding bargains and saving money for my family, but I also felt a different kind of satisfaction when I turned the corner at the shop and saw something I had donated the week before!
Be willing to give what you can't use, as other's have already done for you, and the circle will continue!
May31 ~ A Touch of Whimsey
"Oh, the fun of arriving at a house and feeling the spark that tells you that you are going to have a good time." (Mark Hampton)
Do you add touches of whimsey to your surroundings? I know some of the pages you see in decorating books look so perfect....maybe too perfect....like a stage that was dressed for the occassion, instead of a place where people actually have spent the times of their lives. Don't be so convinced that everything has to stay completely in the same mode, that you are afraid to include things that give you pleasure, because they are not in the same style as the rest of the room. Sometimes it is the unexpected that we enjoy the most.
Many times in quilts, the pattern and colors will go along all the same, matching completely, and then they will pull out one they call a 'zinger' - it is a bright color that people would not have thought of, to add into the block in some small piece and the result is the difference between being a uniform quilt vs being spellbinding!
If you have some momento of your childhood or something you picked up, go ahead and put it out, just to enjoy it everyday. In my old kitchen cabinet, where I have many blue and white dishes, sitting in front of them are 3 little cups and saucers of no particular pattern....they are the ones I bought for 5 cents a piece and played with as a child. Please keep special momentos out of reach of children to save your nerves and theirs! I had a friend who once used an old wooden potty chair with a tray, and sat it in her bathroom with a big teddy bear sitting on it the tray helped keep him sitting on it straight, it was really darling to see, and everyone who saw it wanted one!
Anyway, point is - have fun decorating, don't be totally serious!
Read to June 1-7
*In order to understand the full context of these reflections, you will enjoy your own copy of the Sarah Ban Breathnach book:
"Simple Abundance ~ A Daybook of Comfort and joy"
Sarah's Website ~ ENJOY!: www.simpleabundance.com
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