What many hearing people do not understand is that many Deaf people do not think of themselves as
"disabled" or "handicapped," but rather they view Deafness as a culture. A capital "D" indicates a
cultural affiliation, while a lowercase "d" simply refers to someone with a hearing loss, regardless
of whether or not they are involved in Deaf culture. On this page you will learn about what is
signed as "big 'D'" Deaf.
"HEY YOU! Oh yeah, she can't hear me."
(Or, how to get a Deaf person's attention)
There are several ways that are considered "appropriate" ways to get a Deaf person's
attention.
Waving your hand: Typically a slight flick of the wrist/hand will suffice, unless the person is
across a room. If that is the case, a bigger wave is appropriate.
Tapping: Touching someone's back or shoulder is something that is considering completely
appropriate and normal in Deaf culture, though it often makes hearing people uncomfortable. Do not
tap repeatedly or hard unless the situation is urgent.
Stomping/Banging: Stomping on the floor, or banging on an object such as a table or desk is
another good way to get a Deaf person's attention. The vibrations sent through the floor will alert
the Deaf person that someone is trying to get their attention, and they will look up. When this
happens, wave to let them know it's you.
Flickering lights: This method is typically only used in large rooms or classrooms. Simply
turning the lights on and off one or two times will alert all Deaf people that an announcement is
going to be made. Flickering the lights several times indicates urgency or an emergency.
Using another person: If none of the above methods works, you can always ask someone closer to
the Deaf person to get their attention.
Throwing things: This is probably the LAST resort for getting a Deaf person's attention, and
should only be used when necessary, or with people you know well, not with casual acquantinces.
Lightly toss a small, unharmful object (eraser, pillow, etc) towards the Deaf person, but try
to avoid hitting them. If someone is in front of you, toss it over their head if possible.
"Why do you care who my teacher is?"
(Interacting with Deaf people)
The way Deaf people interact with each other is often very different from the way hearing people
do. Here on some tips on what you might expect when conversing with or hanging out with Deaf
people.
Bluntness: Deaf people are far more blunt than hearing people. If your friend doesn't like your
new haircut, you will know. If a person walking past you is rather large, they are "fat," not
"overweight."
Connectedness: Deaf people will always try to find out how they are connected to you. If they
ask you where you're from, who your sign language teacher is, or what Deaf people you know, it's
because they're trying to bond with you through mutual friends/situations
Off-topic: Deaf people have a tendency to really elaborate their stories, and often go off
on tangents. These tangents lead to other tangents, and pretty soon your conversation about how much
you hate your boss becomes a conversation about shopping.
Hugging: As mentioned previous, touching is a common thing amongst Deaf people. Hugs are a big
part of Deaf culture- people may hug you after meeting you only one or two times!
"That's not how you sign that"
(A few more tips on interacting with Deaf people)
Eye Contact: Eye contact is crucial when having a conversation with someone who is Deaf.
If your eyes are constantly wandering, the person with whom you are talking will assume you are not
interested in what they have to say, and will probably end the conversation. Additionally, it is
hard to carry on a signed conversation when you aren't looking at the other person.
Interruptions: If you need to interrupt a conversation, do not just jump inbetween two signers.
Wait for an appropriate moment, then excuse yourself, explain briefly what you need, and wait for the
person to acknowledge that they are ready to talk to you.
Crossing conversations: If you need to get around people in the middle of a conversation, lightly
tap the person on the back to indicate you would like them to move forward a bit, and go on behind
them. But what do you do when two people are talking, and there isn't enough space to walk behind
either of them? In this case, walking right between the two signers (or group) is perfectly
acceptable. You don't need to get their permission or even say excuse me. Simply walk through.
Chances are the signers won't even notice that someone went through their conversation if it's done
properly.
Voicing: It is considered incredibly impolite to voice without signing while in the
presence of Deaf people. If you do not know enough sign, ask someone to interpret, but never leave
the Deaf person out of the conversation completely.
Correcting signs: Do not EVER tell a Deaf person they are signing something wrong.
If they are signing something that isn't what you learned, ask them to clarify the sign, and show
them the sign you learned. In many cases it may very well be a regional difference in the signs, or
perhaps there are just several signs for a word and you only learned one. Likewise, it is probably
advisable not to correct your teacher's signs either.
Joining a conversation: If you see two people signing that you know, it is okay to join in the
conversation. Wait until it seems like there is a break or lull, then ask if you may join the
conversation. If there are people signing and you don't know them, you probably don't want to
interrupt their conversation.
Over-"hearing" conversations: Unfortunately for Deaf people, it is almost impossible to have a
conversation in public without the chance of someone seeing what you're saying. It is considered
impolite to watch a signed conversation if the signers do not know there is someone else who signs in
their vicinity. When this happens, avoid watching the conversation, and, if a break occurs, you may
introduce yourself and explain that you are a sign language student. This will let the signers know
that they have to watch what they say, if they were having a private conversation.
