Title: Space Cowboys

Author: Countess Rachel

Fandom: Cowboy Bebop/Trigun

Rating: PG-13 (for now, ratings for different chaps may vary)

Warnings: Violence, Language, stuff we’re all pretty much used to and a bit of yaoi Legato/Knives

 

Vash sighed as he wiped the sweat from his glazed forehead. They all sat in the front seat of a topless jeep, bouncing along while Wolfwood steered. Wayshe City was only an hour away, and no one rarely ever visited that place.

 

“Why are we going to Wayshe city again?” Vash groaned tiredly.

 

“Because,” Wolfwood answered equally tired, “it’s far away from everything else. And besides, there’s no one there who’s crazy enough to go after your bounty. Everyone who lives in that town is wanted.” The priest’s answer didn’t settle the blond man’s stomach though. 

 

Milly, who sat next to Nicholas spoke up with her usual optimism. “I’ve heard they have great pastries there. You know how much you like donuts, right Mr. Vash?” A gust of smoke burst from one side of the truck as its hefty tires shattered a large rock on the ground.  Vash donned that classic faux smile and agreed. Deep down though, he felt him coming, as if there were a tracking device installed in his guts, and Mystery Man was attuned to the correct frequency. And what about Knives and Legato? The little sadistic picture was unfolding far too slowly for Vash’s tastes, though he had only encountered this character just today.

 

A thin black line appeared on the horizon as they chugged forward in the jeep. The darkened sunglasses burned with the two sun’s reflections and he glanced over at Milly who was humming sweetly. Meryl and Vash were partnered in the back along with the Punisher that took up eighty percent of the available space.

 

Geez, Wolfwood and his big-ass gun. You’d think just by looking at him, he was the one with the sixty-billion on his head. Meryl stretched her arms out, causing the heavy cross to fall over on Vash. “OW! Hey, watch it! There’s no room in here for that!” Vash whined, struggling to prevent the Punisher from crushing him.

 

Meryl, full of defiant energy, barked back. “Well ex-CUSE me for living! You expect me to just sit back here all cramped up with this huge chunk of metal, huh?!”

 

“Hey! It’s not my fault! Wolfwood’s the one who has to carry this stupid piece a junk around!”

 

“You take that back! The Punisher is NOT stupid! Unlike someone else I know...” The priest growled over his shoulder.

 

Milly waved her hands, “Now, now children. I know we’re not there yet but we will be soon. Honey, keep your eyes on the road.” Wolfwood’s brow twitched in agitation as he jerked the wheel from almost spinning out of his hands.

 

~~~~

 

Spike was rolling right behind them. He had no map, no navigation system, and no sense of direction at all. But the gut that had yet to steer him wrong told him ‘Yes this way! Go! Before someone else gets him!’ This was going to be better than all the bounty heads he ever tracked in history. And what an adventure this was turning out to be--more daring and more dangerous than ever.  There was definitely room for writing a book when he got back to Bebop.

 

Meanwhile Ed puffed in total exasperation. Her portable hacking computer was left somewhere in the desert with the Swordfish, and it was difficult to go without any sort of advanced cybernetic technology for too long. Gunsmoke’s desert was endless, and there was no telling how long it would take to reach the next town. With no computer to entertain herself with, Ed decided to talk. “So Spike-person...how’d you and Jet-person meet?”

 

God, not THAT question... “...Why do you want to know, Ed?”  Spike raised an eyebrow without looking at her.

 

“Because Ed doesn’t know.”  A small distant glitter way out on the horizon caught her eye for a moment. “Ed knows about Ein, and Faye-Faye. But nothing about Spike-person and Jet-person.”

 

“Ed, that’s...a long story. Are you sure you want to hear it?” He swallowed, unsure. She nodded, propping her bare feet on the dashboard. He gave a deep sigh and leaned a little in the driver’s, getting comfortable as well. “Well. Back when Jet was a cop and I was in the syndicate  ...”

 

Ed’s widened incredulously. “Hoo-woah! Spike-person was a bad guy?!”

 

He rolled his eyes, “Yes Ed, Spike-person was a bad guy--a long time ago. Anyway, it was a cold, pretty rainy day and I was outside of this, I guess you could say club...” 

 

Ed grinned mischievously, pulling her goggles over her bright, amber eyes. “Spike-person was at a chi-chi bar too, huh? Heh, naughty lunkhead...” Spike frowned, his face starting to burn a little and he adjusted his collar. 

 

However, he strained to continue.  “AND, I was supposed to be waiting for a new guy. A rookie who was offering to run some Red Eye for the syndicate. I had to check him out, make sure he was clean.” He reached in his pocket to retrieve a crumpled cigarette. “Then he walked up, looking just as cool as a cucumber--back when he had hair. You couldn’t tell just by looking at him that it was only a few years ago.” Spike smiled, a thin trail of sweat tumbling from his green bangs down the side of his face. “And he says, ‘I’m lost sir. Could you tell me where I can find the Wild Wolfe?’” He finally was able to fish out his lighter while handling the unstable vehicle. “Told him he was down by the creek, but I could show him the way so--”

 

Gritting his teeth, Spike buttoned his lip, squishing the cigarette firmly between his hardened lips. Yet he couldn’t stay mad at the girl long, looking so adorable as she slept sprawled on the leather seat. Not that he minded being postponed for the moment, he rather enjoyed the silence. Just the roar of the heavy-duty engine chugging along the dusty expanse soothed the bounty hunter as the scenery rolled by in a wicked blur. It was hot inside the truck, but not uncomfortably so since there was a small clip-on fan whizzing full speed on the dashboard

 

The desert looked same on all sides, the sky a water azul, and the odd two suns scorched whatever their mighty rays touched. The monotony of it all caused Spike’s mind to wander.

 

I know of Vash...

 

That mysterious guy sure was creepy as hell. The way he talked and walked sent off alarms in Spike’s mind-- freak. The hunter chuckled to himself. He didn’t even know the guy’s name so he was reduced to simply ‘freak.’  Those were the guys  you didn’t trust at all and he was mildly surprised that Freak didn’t have a bounty on his head as well. As shifty as he was, there was no reason why he shouldn’t have been worth something. And Vash, now that he really thought about it, wasn’t the type to carry a price at all. The most of what he did see at the bar, though it was about five whole seconds, was a loud goof  with mixed company. But he couldn’t let appearances fool his judgment.  Many times in the past had  Spike been bum rushed by a runt, or easily overthrown a goliath despite his own thin size.

 

Vash...

 

~~~~

 

“Hey, where’s Spike?” Faye swayed her hips as she walked in the living room. Jet sat on the couch  smoking a cigarette and flipping casually through a magazine. He didn’t respond, not caring. Ein sat at the foot of the sofa wearing an old, purple wig of Jet’s and gnawing on one of Spike’s blue shoes. “Come to think of it, Ed’s not here either. Maybe they went somewhere?”

 

“Maybe...” Jet turned a page looking bored.

 

God, well never mind. If Jet was going to be apathetic about people disappearing, she could be just as indifferent too. Sliding on to the sofa across from Jet, the purple-haired woman pulled out a smoke of her own and lit up. “Awfully quiet with the kids gone.”

 

The ex-cop took a long drag from his cigarette and let the smoke float out like thick fog. “E-yup.”

 

Faye kicked her legs up, her yellow shorts riding up high. “Kind of boring now.”

 

“E-yup,” Jet glanced over briefly to steal a peek.

 

Faye half smirked, half glared. “And I know a nice gentleman such as yourself wouldn’t be looking where his eyes don’t belong, now would he?”

 

Jet just shrugged.  He shifted his weight and stood, tossing the  magazine down on the table. “Hey, I’m a guy,” he replied calmly,  “my eyes are exactly where they belong. Besides...if your gonna show it off, expect people look. That’s all.” He smiled and looked the opposite direction of her, “And be thankful that Spike’s not here alone with you instead. He’d probably do a lot more than just look.”  Faye stared, confused, as he left.

 

Stepping into the control room, he tapped into his computer, checking, just out of curiosity, where Spike was. Strangely enough, he wasn’t in the local sector, or any sector for that matter. In fact, his ship wasn’t showing up at all. Either the man was way out near Uranus, or Spike had managed to single-handedly disappear from the living plane.

 

“Or his ship is broken.” Which was a hell of a lot more reasonable. And knowing that idiot, it probably was and he was probably stuck somewhere on some planet. Well, when he was ready to come back, he could just give the Bebop a call. Ed was probably with him too. Poor Ed. Spike had always been talking about letting the kid go out on a mission with either himself, or more preferably Faye since they were both females.

 

~~~~

“Are you kidding, and turn the kid into a hooch?”

 

Spike shrugged. “It’s not like she’s a bombshell or anything. Incase you haven’t noticed, Jet, Ed’s missing a few things that usually turn most men on.”

 

Jet sighed and fell back into his commander’s chair, staring out at the blackness of space. “I dunno, I’d think she’d be safer in the hands of a mafia boss than with Faye.” 

 

Spike laughed. “You do have a point. Fine then, you and me can make sure the kid gets a proper up bringing.” He laughed even harder as he reached for a cigarette. “Yeah, Faye wouldn’t make a very good mom, come to think of it.”

 

“Oh, and you two are the perfect father-figures am I correct?” Faye stood in the door way, hand on hip, pouting. 

 

Jet smirked, “But of course.” The two fellows laughed.

 

Faye rolled her eyes, “Nice to know Ed’s two dads get along SO well. Maybe I should go tell her...”

 

“Edward’s got two dads?!” Ed jumped up behind Faye with Ein in her arms. “Ein! Ed has two dads! Wonderful for Ed, yes?” Spike and Jet started up, trying to clarify things and draw lines before the situation grew out of hand.

 

Faye grinned evilly. “Why yes, Ed. And did I tell you your two daddies love each other very much? Now you’ve got one big, happy family.” She chuckled as she walked off lightly.

 

“Stupid bitch...” Jet mumbled to himself and Spike as Ed danced around them gaily, singing about family.

 

  Jet coughed, his lungs feeling a bit cramped. “Easy there grandpa.” Faye called from the other room.

 

~~~~

 

The jeep screeched to a halt and Vash was the first over board, stretching his gangly legs and arms. He popped his fingers, his back, his neck and any other set of bones that make a sickening ‘crick’ or ‘crack.’

Meryl glanced at the others.

 

“We’re here? Now what?”

 

Wolfwood adjusted his sunglasses and hauled his gun from the back seat in a single, fluid motion. “Now,” He patted Vash on the shoulder and began walking in towards the dusty neighborhood, “we spread the word about our new visitor.”

 

Wolfwood swept up the keys and thanked the hotel manager. “Oh and by the way, just a little rumor I heard, but has any one told you of  ‘Green-haired Gus?’” The manager shook his head listlessly. “Well, I heard he’s the meanest, toughest bounty hunter out there. Managed to keep a low profile until he had a little scuffle with Roscoe the 5th.” The manager raised an eyebrow, obviously interested now. “Yeah. Shot all of his boys when they surrounded him, even though they had their guns out. Stabbed one of ‘em right in his throat. I heard he moved so fast they couldn’t even see him.”

 

“Aw, ya spittin’ hot air, son. Roscoe and his gang wouldn’t get taken out by no ord’nary man. T’ain poss’bull.” The short round man leaned over the counter to signal the bell boy.

 

Wolfwood shrugged. “Well, it’s only a rumor I’ve recently heard, so I can’t say for sure if it’s the truth or not. But, I will say this...the two guys that did come back from his gang said they found Gus by some weird vehicle. Almost like a space craft.” The manager rolled his eyes. “Anyway, thanks.” Wolfwood grinned. 

 

The tall, black-haired man handed the room keys to and his cross to Vash, and a different set to Milly. “I’m gonna go sit in at the bars and listen, if you know what I mean. Care to join?”

 

Vash shook his head, a heavy wave of sleep washing over him. “N-No.” He yawned. “Think I’ll go upstairs to take a nap.” Wolfwood shrugged and Milly and Meryl left on their own as well.

 

Like most hotel rooms in most of the cities, the Wayshe Inn  room wasn’t anything five-star. It had a bed, a night stand, and a chair in the corner. The bathroom, looking as equally dingy as the bedroom, was to the left. There was one bed supposed to accommodate two grown men and something told Vash he’d be sleeping on the floor...again...

 

But not today. He tossed his red coat on to the chair and laid out on the rusty-spring, gray mattress. Vash’s head was asleep before it even hit the pillow.

 

~~~~

 

Spike killed the engine and climbed down. Wayshe City, another tawdry western looking town, was much smaller than Caracas.

 

Good. This would make finding Vash a hell of a lot easier. The people here, mostly guys, looked dark, as if they had been hiding under one gigantic, smelly rock. They all seemed bigger, badder, bolder.

 

“Just the way I like it.” Spike grinned. Shoving his hands into his pockets, he strolled down the street, trying to appear as casual as the next john.   The dust picked up and people covered their noses as not to get sand in their faces. People stared, but only briefly this time, not wanting to attract attention to themselves, which made Spike feel a little more comfortable. So long as this Vash guy or his friends didn’t see him first, they might’ve stood a chance in catching him.

 

Ed walked along side him, looking at the old buildings. Well, maybe not old since the setting was entirely new to her. Never before had she seen such a livelihood. The entire planet went against natural laws. People shouldn’t have been able to survive here. There were no easily accessible water sources, two scorching suns, dry climates and dusty terrain. How could any human live on such a desolate world?  It was down right amazing. 

 

Spike perked up instantly as he saw a familiar person walk from a building. Instantly he ducked into a larger crowd, pulling Ed too. It was that tall guy that liked to smoke, and those two girls. If they were here than Vash was too! But, he wasn’t with them. 

 

Ed peeked around the Martian’s narrow hips. “Hm...looks like they’re hiding typhoons in hotels now.” She leered. Spike nodded, watching as the three headed in the opposite direction. 

 

“...Let’s go.” He whispered. 

 

As they entered the building, the hotel manager looked up from his record book and stiffened for the moment.

 

“I’m lookin’ for a fellow in a long, red coat. You seen anybody like that lately? Goes by the name of Vash.” He stared directly in the newcomer’s eyes.  There was something eerie about them, like the two were completely different. It made the owner shiver. “It’s urgent that I get a message to him. You see, his dear old mother died and I need to tell him immediately.”

 

“Y-You mean the Stampede?” The owner stood back.

 

Ed busied herself touring the lobby. Looking at the strange plants, framed western pictures and other things. She poked at a queer skull, feeling the coarseness of its texture. The hardwood floors were cool on her warm feet and she climbed the overstuffed leather couch which had seen absolutely better days.

 

“I-I don’t know if I can give you tha--”

 

Cha-chik. The manager rattled in fear, staring into the barrel of a black gun. “Look.” He seethed. “I’ve had a fairly pressing day. So do us both a favor and give me the room number, please and thank you.”

 

“R-Room 266.” 

 

Swiftly he spun his gun around on a single finger and slipped it into his back pocket again. Smiling in a pleasant manner he walked away and up the old, rotting stairs to the second floor.

 

Vash snored on his stomach, exhausted to the max. Always traveling, always running, always hiding, life couldn’t suck any worse. Until a friendly knock disturbed his slumber.  He rolled over and mumbled aloud, “Door’s unlocked Nick.”

 

It creaked open slowly and the figure in the doorway smiled. “Uh, sorry. I don’t go by that.” 

Vash’s eyes exploded instantly. He stayed still, willing his body not to stiffen or make any sudden movements. His gun was tucked in his coat which hung on the wall directly beside the doorframe. Shit. Stay calm, stay calm. It’s probably just some innocent guest with the wrong room. Glancing in the reflection of the window though, he saw that same man with the green hair and the blue suit.

 

The blond man sighed, and slowly began to sit up. Scratching his head and stretching, he yawned and rubbed his eyes as if he were waking up to his usual morning routine--though oddly enough, there had been mornings where this sort of situation had happened before. “Look, Charlene I don’t have your money today cuz my check was late this week. I promise if you talk with Beaux he’ll give you the deposit first thing.”

 

Spike sucked on his teeth. “Spare me the bullshit and come along quietly, Vash the Stampede.”

 

Vash rolled his eyes. “So you are after that stupid bounty.” He stood up and Spike’s defenses immediately went into play. The bastard was way too calm, meaning he was smart enough to assess his situation and develop an escape plan if such presented itself. “Gotta hand it to ya, not many people have been able to catch the Humanoid Typhoon off guard.” Vash smiled benignly. “You’ve got some serious skill as a bounty hunter I can tell.”

 

“Flattery won’t work, friend. I’m too pissed off and too professional.” Spike was growing impatient quickly. “Are you going to come out or am I going to have to come in...?”

 

 Vash walked toward the Martian, hands held up in surrender. “Hey, hey now. No need to get pushy here. I’m coming.”

 

This was it. He was about to pull something drastic and he felt it brewing in his gut. Bounty heads, especially ones as high as this one didn’t go down easy.  Vash stopped for a moment. “I need to get my coat--”

 

“Leave it. It’s a million degrees outside, there’s no need for it.”

 

“But it was a present from my sick aunt!!” the grown man blubbered. “Right before she died I promised her I’d take good care of it. It’s so important to me.”

 

“Oh for Christ’s sake...!” Spike, out of sheer frustration, started to grab for the man which turned out to be a big  mistake. In less than a second he was flipped over on his back and Vash was in his coat spinning his silver piece round and round on a single digit.

 

He was out the door, pounding down the hallway, coat flapping violently behind him like some red streamers. Spike, not the one to be made a fool of, was on his tail, long blue legs taking drastic strides to decrease the distance and increase his speed.

 

Vash flew out the hotel door and into the crowd. It worked once, it sure as hell could work again. Dammit, guys where the hell are you?

 

“Dammit Ed, where the hell are you?” Spike grit his teeth and bounded outside just in time to see red disappear into a sea of plain clothes. “Geez, he’s wearing a bright, red coat for crying out loud, he can’t be too damn hard to find.”

 

Wolfwood and Milly were at a vendor looking at funny things like baby booties and bibs for some odd reason when some commotion caught the corner of his eye. He pulled his sunglasses from the top of his head down on to his nose.

 

Milly looked up, “Something wrong, Mr. Priest?”

 

“I think so,” he shuddered. “Lets go.” 

 

Vash dashed out, trying to get to his truck. This new guy definitely wasn’t going to be out ran since he was obviously gaining. If he could get to the truck he could easily find Wolfwood and the others and get a head start somewhere else.

 

He looked to his left. THERE! The jeep was in plain sight, parked with a few other vehicles. “If I can just get in the truck...” He was almost there. He could smell, no taste the damn greasy oil from the motor engine and then, “OOF!”

 

“GOT-CHA!” Ed beamed proudly. She sat upright on Vash’s back with a big grin on her face. People stopped to stare, but not many.

 

“ED!” Spike jogged up to the two breathing hard and glistening with sweat. He smiled proudly as well. “Good job!” He pat her on the head and she mewed like a kitten. “First lesson in bounty hunting kid. Be on your toes.” 

 

Spiegel reached down and removed Vash’s weapon from his person. “And of course lesson two. Disarm the head when you have him neatly secured.”

 

Vash groaned. “I wouldn’t exactly consider this neatly.”

 

“Now what Spike person?” Ed scratched her head.

 

Spike laughed. “What else, Ed? We turn him in for that big reward.”

 

TBC