Mystery: Part One

That's right -- Everyone who takes a guess through "Ask Seller a Question" or " Contact Member" may be given a secret key to my tangled tale & private pics --or, as that famous radio personality says: "The Rest of the Story!" Your guess doesn't even need to be correct! Although if you saw me before ebay pulled down my auctions - you may already know me -- but, shshhh......it's a  "Mister E" (clue #1) Auction!

Once you have been emailed your key, you will be able to read the whole entire story of how Ebay has censored me & labeled me X-rated! It has been most unfair to malign me in this manner and I only want the truth to be known! My Rock-Solid (clue #2) reputation has been unfairly besmirched and I just want the chance to clear my good name.  

I am looking for a new & loving home. This is what you are actually bidding on: my original hand-made Certificate of Censorship made by the seller, as pictured in this auction. This is the ONLY one my seller has created; there is no other! I will be accompanying it as a FREE GIFT from the seller to the winning bidder.

I am better than a pet! I will not wander, do not bite, will not cost you any vet bills, don't require to be fed, watered or walked, and can be left alone for extended periods of time... Yes, you can put me wherever you wish, even in the garden (clue #3) and I will stay put; I will not back-talk or sass you --ever!

Just have faith in me & I will bring joy & blessings to your family as I have for generations to all those who have possessed me. So email seller -or- Bid Now and maybe YOU will take me home!

Mystery: Part Two

For every 1000 hits (views) this auction receives, my current family will add one more FREE GIFT to this auction for the winning bidder! I can't tell you what these gifts will be - it is a Mystery after all... But I can give you this much: They will be very nice, quality gifts, that you will be pleased to keep for yourself, or to re-gift as you choose. These Mister E gifts could be toys, unused wedding gifts, valuable collectibles, -you name it- (but no junk) and will be provided by members of my extended "family" as Free Gifts to the winning bidder.

Mystery: Part Three

When we get to 100 viewers (on the counter below), the seller will post a picture of me here for everyone to see. Please also put me on your Watch Page! I thank all of you for stopping by and for helping me to reclaim my good name! Also, wishing you all a HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!! (clue #4)

First UPDATE!

Alright everybody -- only Day 2 and we've passed 100 hits! So here is my picture as promised...Although I must wear this disguise... Do you know me now? Please don't forget to hit the Ask Seller a Question link above, or email me for your "key" to the rest of the story!