Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi

My name is Durduc-Roibu Costel. I am 31 years old and I live in Romania, in Galatzi.. Until the year 1999 I was a person who did not know anything else but to ruin himself. At that time I was dissatisfied of everything and everybody. I was living with the one who became my wife that very year. Fate pushed me away from a place where I was in charge of many things, where I came to believe that I was above any hierarchy. From 19 until I was 24 , being involved into a total illusion, I liked to think that I had the right to occupy that high spot. In my endless ego I forgot that the real power of decision was not mine so I was thrown one day to another factory as a result of staffing necessities. I became a lowly worker performing hard physical work.

Disgusted of my own being and of the bad habits that plunged me into depression (I started having giddiness and anxiety), I decided to give up drinking. I started seeing doctors, all kinds of specialists in endocrinology, neurology etc. in the hope that a medical treatment would compel me to renounce alcohol and tobacco. I was trying to regain my physical and mental health which I was so proud of few years before when I was practicing martial arts.

The result was �zero. Like a man on the point of getting drowned I was appealing to my memory (I was very proud of it) to offer me a salvation. Coming back to martial arts could have been a solution but I was aware that my physical health did not allow me to do it at that moment. I wanted to become the master of my own body, emotions and psyche. From somewhere very deep in my mind came the word "yoga". Except that I had read a small book of Hatha Yoga, when I was 14-15 years old, and tried to practice it I did not have any knowledge about what Yoga really means.I knew that in my town there were two forms of yoga: Hatha-Yoga and Tantra-Yoga but something inside me stopped me from accepting any of these two alternatives. I think that nobody, no matter how low down he would have fallen, could have accepted those practices led by some people who unjustifiably and arrogantly were calling themselves "gurus".

And then, one day in the summer of 1999 a "miracle" happened. I saw a small poster with a shinning face of a lady from India, with a warm smile together with an invitation to all the seekers to experience the Self Realization and Kundalini awakening through Sahaja Yoga. Near it, another poster with a "great master" from China was inviting everybody to a Y Qing course for developing powers and curing, etc. even if the success was guaranteed to this second one, the wonderful smile and the warm glance of that lady Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, conquered my soul. I decided in that very moment to go to Sahaja Yoga.

I did not go that week, not even the next week, but on 14th July 1999 I took heart and I went to the hall where even now the Sahaja Yoga programs are held. There I was invited to take out my shoes

( it seemed all natural to me). I saw a lady from India wearing a sari ( I did not know that she is the wife of a Sahaja Yogi ) and waiting for the program to start I was watching the door all the time to see when the lady in the photo was coming. In the hall was Her picture. She had a smile that was consoling with its kindness and warmth. There were also a candle, incense sticks that were giving fragrance to the air and coming from a tape recorder, the traditional Indian music was filling the hall with its tune. As I saw some boys sitting cross-legged on the ground I tried to show off some bravery and sat down the same way.

I was quite amazed to see that after the invitation to sit down a young man wearing glasses came in front and explained that the lady in the photo, Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, cannot be present everywhere, traveling in many countries and that is why we are using Her photo as a source of vibrations necessary for awakening the Kundalini energy in any human being. I accepted to do the experiment of Self Realization which is very simple. It is based on making some inner assertions and placing the right palm on some energetic centers in our subtle body while the left handis placed comfortably on the lap palm up and oriented towards Shri Mataji�s photo.

I must tell you that I was trembling because I was very weak and couldn�t stay cross-legged anymore. In the hope that nobody would study me, with emotion and even fear I did the experiment. Being encouraged that nothing wrong would happen I succeeded not to faint until the end of the experiment. Asked if I felt the cool breeze coming out of the center of the palms I answered: "No". I was full of sweat, my palms were burning and in the forefinger from the left hand I felt pricks as if the blood circulation was long stopped and just restarted that very moment. I was explained that these symptoms are due to some negativity existent in the subtle body.

The heat comes from the energetic centers (called chakras � in Sanskrit) and is due to the Kundalini awakening. Kundalini is placed at the base of the spinal cord, in the sacrum bone. This energy has the role to "burn" these negativities and purify the subtle body permitting the chakras to perform again their duties, reinstalling their balance, nourishing them. Harmony and health at the physical, psychical as well as emotional level naturally ensue. It also allows our attention to come inside and focus on the Spirit so that we can ascend.

After the experience of Self Realization, some people present there gave me vibrations for balancing my subtle body. As a result I felt over the fontanel bone area a little cool-warm breeze.

I decided to follow the instructions given by the sahaja yogis. The path was somewhat uphill for me because of my unbalanced condition as a result to my previous life style but through a constant practice of purification techniques and meditation, after about three months from the experiment I felt clearly the cool breeze coming out from my head. A stirng of the Kundalini energy had fully pierced the fontanel area and it then filled my whole being with cool vibrations. I felt the peace coming inside me and calming down my mind, leaving me in Nirvichara Samadhi (the thoughtless state). For the first time I was meditating.

All the bad things, my vices, alcohol, tobacco� dropped then effortlessly through the constant practice of Sahaja Yoga.Now, when I became the master of my own being, I am looking back to the slow and unsure steps I started with while supported and encouraged by Sahaja Yogis and I know that I have chosen a path that could seem easy but it is not quite so. I have now to fight with other "enemies" inside : anger, egoism, greed, lack of faith, hatred, harsh speaking. I feel though that I am a man truly blessed by God. I feel that through the method of Sahaja Yoga and by the grace of Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, surrounded by the others love and walking the same path with my wife, I will succeed in defeating all these enemies in time.

I wish you all the seekers the same thing: experience the wonders of Kundalini awakening and Sahaja Yoga and may God bless you !