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To some, people like me who allow for definitions like that would not be gothic because we allow �non-gothic� forms of music in our CD Cases. See, according to them Gothrock and Deathrock styles from The Cure and Siouxsie qualify as do the newer Newgrave groups, but none of the other styles do.
I lean heavily on the broader definition but I recognise that Goth groups have certain musical conventions that define it even in its lighter or more artistic forms. Gothic bands will not use Double Kick Drums or the Wah Wah pedal. There are not the long solos used in classic rock either. Comparing James Thorogood, Poison, Hendrix and Bon Jovi to Lacuna Coil would be a good example. You may not be able to put your finger on exactly why they are different, but you will know intuitively that they are.
Secondly, for those who love musical theory, most forms of rock use an Ionian mode; gothic music of all sorts uses Dorian, Phrygian, and Lydian Modes. These are distinctions having to do with the use of key structure and tone in the music. I am not well versed in it but when they are played side by side, you can hear the difference. For one thing, there is a larger use of minor keys, which makes the music more dark, or less light.
In gothic music, the scale is the typical 1-4-5 typical to rock, but it is augmented or diminished, the composition is vertical rather than horizontal like blues. It is clean and moving into warm overdrive. The synths, if present, are in analog and based on strings. In general the tempo is more subdued than any form it resembles (ie gothic metal will be more subdued and melodic).
The guitar riffs are different also. The gothic form uses the down stroke almost exclusively. Additionally, it may be "based" on a chord structure; octave fingering is used more often than pure chords. Other gothic distinctions would be the use of classical formats with whatever form is being used such as operatic vocals, orchestras (real or simulated), Gregorian chants or choruses. Keyboards are used to make eerie or airy sounds. Echoes, white noise, fuzz and distortions are common. Vocals can be muffled, growled, moaned or sung in a classical manner. There is the "wall of sound" where several instruments of the same type are layered to produce a full, more expansive sound.
In my opinion, when a band uses Gothic style formats, they are producing Gothic music regardless of whether or not that music falls under another major classification. If the band does this regularly, they are then a Gothic band. For example compare Type O Negative and My Dying Bride to regular Metal or Enya and Black Tape for a Blue Girl. You can sense the difference even if you are not that adept in musical theory and were totally lost during my above technical description. Go on, I dare you to REALLY listen to music and see what you find.

