Title: Safe Harbor - Epilogue Author: shawntaw Category: MSR, Mulder/Scully/Skinner friendship, ProfilingMulder Rating: PG Disclaimer: I don't own the x-files characters. I think we may have established that by now, don't you? The fact that I don't have any money and am making no money from this has, unfortunately, been established as well. *L* Summary: Now that she and Skinner had found Mulder and the physical danger was pretty much over, she found her mind turning to other matters. Feedback makes me very happy at shawntaw@hotmail.com :) DEDICATION: To all of my feedback regulars!:) You made this possible and I took every word you wrote to heart!!!:) AND, OF COURSE, TO DANI WHO HAS MADE A WEBSITE OF MY STORIES: www.geocities.com/corran_14776/shawntaw.html Thank you.:) ************************************************************************ Scully watched Mulder's face as he lay unconcious in the hospital bed. The worst was over. She sighed heavily and shifted in her chair. Or was it? Oh, he would wake up from his injuries and dehydration soon. The doctors had reassured her of that and she'd seen his chart for herself. She watched the I.V. drip slowly into the tube leading to his hand. No, her concerns didn't lie with the physical. Now that she and Skinner had found Mulder and the physical danger was pretty much over, she found her mind turning to other matters. Like, why was he drinking that night in the first place? And, was it the first time he had tried to self-medicate his nightmares with alcohol? How long had this been going on? And were the nightmares only about his sister, or were there other things in Mulder's past that she didn't know about. Mulder could be such a loner sometimes, she wondered if perhaps she'd missed the signs. His father had been an alcoholic. Scully knew these things could be genetic. How many nights had he sat alone in his apartment, getting quietly drunk so that he could pass into a dreamless sleep? Or had he ever done that? How many of the late-night phone calls she'd received from Mulder had been an attempt to resist the urge to drink himself into forgetfulness? She realized there was so much she didn't know. But she was going to ask him, when the time was right. And she was going to be watching him a little closer. Skinner appeared at the door, holding it open with one hand and frowning with concern at the man in the bed. Scully had the feeling she wouldn't be the only one keeping an eye on Mulder. She smiled reassuringly at Skinner. His eyes lost some of their worry and he started to speak when his cellphone trilled. Skinner made an apologetic face and stepped back into the hallway, the door shutting behind him. Scully turned her attention back to the man in the bed. There were a lot of things she'd been thinking about. She'd almost lost this man. Her friend. Her partner. Scully sighed. She knew she shouldn't fall in love with Mulder, but feared it was too late. Yes, 'partners' was the perfect word to describe the two of them. Shared joy. Shared pain. She wondered why he hadn't shared this particular pain with her. What had been done to him in his past that he had so much emotional baggage? Was he ashamed that he'd turned to alcohol? Maybe the time in the hotel had been the first time? These are things they would have to talk about. Mulder's hand twitched and she stepped forward to take it. His hazel eyes opened, confused. She leaned over him. Mulder's face lit up when he saw her. He smiled. She smiled back and, bending forward, placed a kiss softly on his lips. His eyes held surprise when she pulled away. Then he smiled again, this time wider. His hand squeezed hers. She squeezed back. Scully reached forward, and stroked his hair. Neither spoke. She knew he couldn't because of his throat and she felt no need to use words right now anyway. His eyes began to flutter as she stroked his hair. Mulder struggled against sleep, his innate curiousity shining in his eyes. Scully knew he wanted to ask her questions. Find out what happened. Ask how it was that he was not dead. She was not looking forward to telling him that noone was quite sure why Arlene had killed herself and not Mulder. Perhaps they would never know. There would be time for all of that later as well. She continued to lightly stroke his hair. Mulder's eyes closed, long lashes resting on pale cheeks, and his breathing evened out. Not the breathing of a man unconcious, but that of a man who is enjoying hard-earned rest. Scully wondered if his mother had ever comforted him this way after a childhood nightmare. She wondered if Mulder had ever been truly happy at all. Had 'The Quest' consumed him like this since the age of twelve? Was there no room for happiness in his life or did he fear he was damaged goods and that no one would want him and all of his problems too? Scully wondered what roles she filled for Mulder. Friend, certainly. Keeper, sometimes. Mother? Sister? Perhaps at times.... She filled in whatever gaps needed filling. Could she love him? Was he able to love her? Could she deal with ALL of Mulder? Scully snickered to herself. She did that already. Scully realized she had forgotten one of the roles they filled for one another, but almost dismissed the thought as too maudlin, too sappy. Sighing in the privacy of her own mind, she allowed herself to give voice to the thought. Scully once again leaned forward and brushed her lips carefully across his slightly parted lips. "Soulmate," she said softly. *************************************************************************** Well, folks, that's it. *sigh* I feel proud, happy, relieved and sad all at the same time!*L* I hesitate to ask, but I am thinking about writing about the psychological aftermath of "Safe Harbor" and dealing with Mulder's possible alcoholism and his emotional baggage. I'll let you decide. E-mail me and let me know if I should write a sequel to "Safe Harbor" dealing with these issues.... I feel like you're all old friends. I really appreciated all the feedback. Thank you so much! :) *sniff sniffle* Don't worry, they're happy tears....:)