I sit and ponder the brevity of life
I wonder if the next day will be my last
Or if I will live another decade
Thoughts of pain and sorrow echo through my tortured mind
For I am worried,worried about death
as i stood in the back of the funeral home
i noticed a lot of people there, but i felt so alone
i had begun to think that no one really cared
i began to think of how ironic it was i was even there
when just last night i had tried to take my own life
my existence was full of brokenheartedness and strife
i guess that moment wasn't my time to go
but now here i was at the funeral of a person i didn't know
i assumed it was my mom's friend, whom i knew had a bad heart
there were so many people here, i didn't know where to start
everyone's faces were all covered with tears
it was the most people i had seen at this funeral home in years
whoever this was must of been someone truely kind and good,
but still i had no clue, so in the back i just stood
till i saw my sister tear up and start to cry
i reached out to hug her, but she just passed me by
i thought this odd, but she was really distraught
"maybe she didn't notice me standing here" i thought
i began to wonder who this person everyone loved could be
so i approached the casket, in hopes i could see
as i looked in, i turned ghostly white
and i began shaking, terrified at the sight
but i leaned even closer so i could truely see
and yes, there in that coffin
the person that everyone was crying about
the person that seemed so important now
the person that everyone loved
...was me
a gentle breeze blows softly through the trees
i watch the leaves, and it puts my mind at ease
i've been locked inside for so long
tired of everyone asking me what was wrong
it feels good to get a breath of fresh air
to frolic through the mountains without a care
a large black cloud looms just overhead
soothing raindrops fall on my head
what a wonderful day
the rain comes
and washes it all away
rejuvenated
phones ringing, i'm screaming
the doors knocking cuz of the produce man bringing
that stack of bananas, overripe
the pears came in but they're the wrong type
store opens in an hour, out of cauliflower
i hate to trash the melon, but the melon's gone sour
my produce skills, make you laugh
i threaten with the melon knife, but i put it back
there goes some kids poking holes in the grapes...
bossman, don't worry, i promise i'll scurry
over there and rewrap them
well it's ok,...but i'm not amused
it's just another day in produce
oh there's many places i'd rather be
a few oranges, some tangerines
i'd trade this job for anything
"don't drop the bananas cuz the'll bruise"
whoa...just another day in produce
friday, the trucks late, guess i'll never have it ready by 8
as i wait for it, i start to sigh,guess i'll just improvise
plan B, it's one of my tricks,
i'll fill the empy holes with salad mix
wish i could gallivant to my room, get a little sleep that's overdue
but last night i had a bad dream
the cabbage and the celery were throwing rotten squash at me
and i woke with a horrible scream
but it's ok, though i'm not amused
it's just another day in produce
there's many places i'd rather be
a few oranges, some tangerines
i'd trade this job for anything
i can't win, i always loose...
it's just another day in produce
allow me to take a moment, to stop and rewind
before this moment, things seemed just fine
but as i think back, things aren't fine at all
i thought i was happy, but my thoughts were too small
the world is much too big and horrid a place
all good thoughts i may have are quickly replaced
by thoughts of the evil nature of the world
a beaten little boy, a raped little girl
and why? why do atrocities like that even exist?
why to a child would one raise a fist?
I think it is time to stop and realize
the human race is not good, it is one to despise
we kill each other like it's a thing of joy
we destroy the land like it's ours to destroy
we see a homeless man, and simply walk by
we don't care that he's homeless, or even why
to continue to go on this way would be most unwise
to do so, would be to aid in our own perilous demise
a single tear rolls down my face
a hundred more ready to take it's place
i watch the sun and the clouds go by
as i look up, and wonder why
why it had to happen, why it had to be this way
why every thought in my head brings me back to that day
life can be going just fine, things can be great
and then your world is crushed, brought down by a twist of fate
still it's something that's hard to believe
something before this point that my mind couldn't conceive
i miss the person i used to be, times happy, times glad
mostly, mostly, i miss the life I once had
i tried to make her happy, i tried in every way
no matter how i tried, a new failure every day
it had begun to affect me, left my demeanor in the dark
like a lost soul looking for the answers, i had missed my mark
the pain was like a thousand daggers all driven in my heart
i felt like no matter how i wanted to, i couldn't fill the part
but one day as i called her name, she did not reply
so i went up to her room to see the reasons why
she wasn't there, but a strange note lay there instead
it was written sloppily and in a pecuilar ink of red
it said "i'm sorry but i can't stand this anymore
my will to live has vanished, to die my soul does outpour
i love you and thank you for always being there
there never was a doubt in me that you didn't care
but the torment was too much, too much for me to take
so now i rest my troubles at the bottom of the lake"
i closed my eyes and wept, knowing i could do nothing about the matter
today it all had ended, my whole world had been shattered
my life has taken a most monotonous tone
even when i'm with someone, i feel alone
my friends all tell me everything will be okay
i show no emotion, i just shrug and walk away
it doesn't matter if i'm happy, i'll just live a while and die
it doesn't matter when i die, it doesn't matter why
my soul is full of pain
my heart is big and sore
and the sad thing about it
is it doesn't even matter anymore
there are times that i feel useless
i wish i could fill tomorrow with a little ray of hope
but i feel restrained, as if on the end of a very short rope
i feel confined, as if encaged or in a fence
i think about it often, though it hardly makes sense
my soul is full of pain
my heart is big and sore
and the sad thing about it
is it doesn't even matter anymore
surrounded by jagged and twisted metal
seemingly as delicate now as a flower petal
steel bent out of shape, till it's forced to break
it feels like a dream, but you know you're awake
extinguished that day, were many lives
women without children, husbands without wives
terror on this day has come from the skies
but like a phoenix from the ashes, we shall arise
we shall be all the more together, all the more strong
things like this cannot stand, it is wretched and wrong
so, we must shout it to all those that are even remotely in range
"i'm proud to be an american, and i shall never change"
as i hold her close and her face i touch
i whisper "i love you baby, oh so much"
she looks at me, her face covered in blood
her pretty dress all tarnished with mud
"it's gonna be alright, it's gonna be ok"
on my shoulder, her head does she lay
a tear rolls down my cheek because i know this is it
"hang on, hun, keep fighting, don't quit"
but her injuries are extremely severe
i close my eyes, and feel my lip quiver with fear
i can feel her getting weaker, the end is near
i break down now....i start to cry
there's no hope for her, she's going to die
then she lifts her head, and smiles though i know she's in pain...
says "don't worry, baby, i'll see you again"
i kiss her on the cheek and lower my head
heaven has another angel, my baby is dead
there was a time i thought we'd always be together
we were a constant, seperated never
as time went on, something went wrong
our "neverending" love slipped away, and then was gone
i guess all good things must end in time
it wasn't really your fault, it wasn't really mine
love is a most curious thing
it can make your heart jump, it can make your soul sing
or it can bring you down to your knees
crying at night, thinking about your insecurities
but i try not to think of these things anymore
my heart is not empty, it is big and sore
i love you still, i'll love you forevermore
i'll love you through everything my heart can weather...
there was a time i thought we'd always be together
why am i here? why am i there?
Actually,why am i anywhere?
answers to these questions, i do insist
oftentimes i ponder why i exist
why am i here now, on this earth?
exactly what is the point of my birth?
will i live much longer? will i die soon?
am i just a musical note in a greater cosmic tune?
to play for a while, and then be heard no more
my future seems darker with every closing door
it is no longer bright, it is now bleak
why can't i be strong, why must i be weak
i will think of these questions forever, i guess
inside my mind, a tangled, confused mess
i think and i think till it drives me insane
it rips at my senses, it tears at my brain
it is too late for me, i cannot be mended
i will ask these questions till my life has ended
It's too bad how loves are lost
Like the seas, they're tossed and tossed
It's too bad now you're gone
And I'm left all alone
You know it's too bad
And way too sad
I came home from work one day
shovelin' manure and balin' hay
to find that you had went away
left me a note without much to say
I sat down and thought real hard
gotta say, caught me a bit off guard
I coulda cussed and got real mad
But I just shrugged and said "that's too bad"
It's too bad how loves are lost
Like the seas, they're tossed and tossed
It's too bad now you're gone
And I'm left all alone
You know it's too bad
And way too sad
It's too bad, you had to be without me
It's too bad, you couldn't see
just how our love could be
It's too bad
It's just too bad
It's too bad
It's just... too... bad