| If the E! Channel was a person, he'd be a Nazi |
| I've passed the E! Channel lately a few times on my way to Comedy Central, and I've noticed a channel that I never really cared to notice. This channel harbors some of the most sacreligious programming in the world. On a given day, you might switch to E! to see another action packed episode of Dr. 90210, a show dedicated to showing you a perverted plastic surgeon who likes to practice karate. Wow. That is simply spectacular. How about the shows that you also see on that "channel". They are all degrading in some aspect. Taradise, True Hollywood Story, 101 Greastest Celebrity Slimdowns, E! News, The Simple Life, Number 1 Single with Lisa Lobe, The Girls Next Door, 101 Starlicious Makeovers, Gastineau Girls, and about 20 other shows that will make you want to choke on your own vomit. With the sudden exception of the Soup and Saturday Night Live, E! is one of those channels that have no relevance to any other network, in they excell in Celebrity Gossip. Yay. The coveted grail of news that I need to keep up to date about Mary-Kate's ongoing cocaine addiction. They should call me in the mornings at 7:00am and scream in my ear that Lindsey Lohan still doesn't have a date for this Friday. Well boo-hoo, tell it to the sad 35 year old douchebag who sits on his couch everyday eating Funions and masturbating to the 1-900 commercials late at night. A little off topic for a second, that's something else I noticed, the commericals to phone in and call a young hottie and hook up with her to make sparks on a remote beach in Cancun. But all I see is hot women on there. I find a problem with that. Back in high school, and even in college, I saw that the really attractive females had no problem finding a date. They didn't have to wait till the ass-crack of dawn for some retard to phone in a say that he wanted to see how her tits bounced. The attractiveness of the commercial is enough to make you wanna call in, but in fact, the only thing you'll get is a 40 year old narcoleptic with a hole in her lung. Sexy. But back on topic, do we really need to know this much about celebrities? Do you need Ryan Seacrest making a shocking newsbreak everytime Jude Law stopped at a red light? I'm getting tired of the attention these attention-whores are getting. They're regular people! Why do we have to constantly take pictures of them? Just cause they are on the silver screen a lot? I go in EBgames all the time, they don't take my picture and scream my name and throw their panties at me, and I'm actually kinda glad about that. Please, boycott the modern plague known as celebrities, cause as soon as they know we know about them, it might already be too late. |