| Go ahead, you retarded loser, cry |
| I'm sick and tired of seeing people cry for the most stupidist reasons. I'm tired of having to console people for the bullshit that I don't care about. So what? You stubbed your toe and now you hate the world. This one time I remember this girl came up to me at school all of a sudden and started telling me all her problems. Her parents were getting divorced, her sister just got knocked up by a jock, and she had a death threat from her ex-boyfriend. As I listened to her prattle on for what seemed like a whole minute, (which in the male world is about the eqivalence of an entire movie) I rolled my eyes and powerbombed her into a desk. Doesn't any females out there know that the only time that males actually give a flying fuck about your feelings is when we're horny and want to get into your pants? And yet you just don't get it, which is why God made trees, to make into bats, which fit perfectly into that little hard hat you call a skull. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate women. If I did, I'd be gay. I just can't stand that women think that males actually care about what happened in your day. And when you cry, that's supposed to soften us up and proceed to the cuddling? Hey, I don't think so. That's not the way we work. We need a little push in the right direction, and I don't mean cupcakes. When women cry, it just confuses us, and makes us want to get someone else to do something about it. Helping a crying girl is like solving a Rubix Cube, except the cube is rigged to blow if you don't solve it in under five minutes. Crying females are like ticking time bombs. Just put them in front of a bunch of people you don't care about and watch an outburst ensue, Here's a list of translations that men usually think in their mind as their women are bitching and moaning. TRANSLATIONS What She Says: I don't know what to do, I'm scared. What She Means: I'm helpless. Have sex with me. What She Says: I love you so much. What She Means: I'm horny. Have sex with me. What She Says: I'm in pain. I'm really sad What She Means: I'm desperate. Have sex with me. Women's minds are small. They don't think outside the box too often. And it confuses the hell out of us males that want to try to "get" you. And when you cry, you make it harder. So the next time you decide to cry, shut the hell up. |