Title: In Search of the Perfect Hand
Author: cherry vanilla
Codes: Original fic, Romance, Brad/Kevin
Rating: PG
Status: NEW, Complete 8/22/01
Series/sequel: no
Summary: "Maybe this doesn't have to be the only hand you are dealt."
Notes: At work, as I am bored, I tend to have fun making up stories about the people that come in. You know, I give them a name and a background. Maybe they want to escape; maybe they're going on a date. Maybe their dog died and they need some cheering up. Anyway, I had a fleeting thought today concerning a guy that came in and it turned into this. So, I guess inspiration would go to him, whomever he is.
* * * * * * * * * *
"Have a little faith, there's magic in the night."
* * * * * * * * * *
Brad entered the Cinaplex and wondered for the tenth time, since the walk from the car to the door, what on earth he was doing here. The place was big and mostly empty; the person behind the counter looked awfully bored. He looked at his watch. And why did he have to show up so *early*? Maybe to build up the anticipation more. And if so, could he really call that a good thing considering all the second thoughts he'd been having?
He was going on a blind date; it was his third this month alone. Marlene swore this one would be different, though, and he was holding her to that. Marlene was his best friend and a constant matchmaker. She called it a hobby, but he'd often ask if she wasn't receiving commission somehow off all of this. She seemed to take more an interest in it than her actual job.
The first guy he'd been setup with had been cute -- until he'd started picking his nose right in front of him.
The second guy was Andy. Andy had been polite and reserved. Andy had started preaching to him by the end of the night how the Lord was his savior and he too can go on the path righteousness if he wanted. It was never too late to 'see the light.'
Brad had gotten home and phoned Marlene right away, saying "The next time you set me up, could you make sure the guy is still a practicing homosexual first?'
The third, and most recent, was Alex. He said they'd go to eat at Tony's. Brad had been expecting a nice Italian restaurant. The place he'd been taken to had Italian food all right, if you could distinguish it from the other glob of stuff on the plate. A four star dive, it was not. Alex had said it was the best place to eat cheap around. Brad had a looked around, taken in the flies on the walls and asked if he'd never heard of a Wendy's. He took a cab home that night.
So, here he was again. Why on earth he was listening to Marlene for the fourth time, he didn't know. "This is different," she'd said. "I actually *know* this one. I admit, the other few I'd only met a few times, they were more friends of friends, actually."
He walked up toward the ticket booth, as the rest of her words replayed in his head. "Look, Brad, you're lonely. You have been ever since ... well ... And I know you're losing hope, but you shouldn't. Maybe this doesn't have to be the only hand you're dealt, Brad. Maybe this guy will be the one. And I know you're finding it hard to even believe in that anymore, but ... give it a shot, okay?"
He knew that was the main reason he was here. His desperate want to believe Marlene's words.
He approached the counter and forced himself to be optimistic. "Two for "The Others", please."
Jesus, The Others? Why'd this guy wanna go see a horror film? Hmm, maybe I can get out of it by puking if it comes to that.
The girl behind the counter seemed somewhat distracted as she talked to another employee that had just showed up. Finally, she turned back to Brad, still laughing and said, "One, you said?"
"No, two."
"Sorry," she smiled. "11.50, please."
Brad took out the money, but he'd since faltered. Her saying 'one' reminded him of how many times he'd bought just that when going to the movies over the last few years. And how he was buying a ticket for this guy when he wasn't even here yet and this whole setup could just be a disaster waiting to happen.
He took his and change and walked in the direction of the movie, bypassing the concession stand all together.
He can buy his own damn popcorn.
Brad chose a seat toward the back and looked at his watch. 3:45. Okay, he could wait. And he'd have to go out and wait for him anyway, being he had both tickets. He cursed himself for being nice.
Maybe they'd like me better if I were a creep. A guy who used and abused and never looked back.
Sighing, he closed his eyes and hoped the time would go by fast.
* * * * * * * *
4:00 came and no sign of Kevin. He was waiting by the Guest Services booth now. 4:10 arrived and still no sign. Confidence sinking, he decided to wait until 4:30. Then he'd look outside.
* * * * * * * *
The trip back out the door was a difficult one. He felt as if everyone could read what happened just by looking at the curve of his back. He walked briskly until he was outside, where he dropped the act and felt his shoulders slump in defeat.
Stood up by a guy you haven't even met yet. This time, my friend, you've hit an all-time low.
Sighing, he sat on the concrete ledge and looked out at the parking lot. He didn't know how long he'd sat, just staring, thinking about all the disappoint, frustration his love life had become ever since his lover's death three years ago. The depression had come first, the not even wanting to date anymore or find some kind of happiness. Then acceptance came, through the help of Marlene and his family, that Peter was gone, but Brad wasn't.
And the slow, gradual start of dating and clubbing, followed. The meaningless sex and short-lived relationships; the nightly chore, that had somehow become a search, a search for a person that would spark even a tenth of an interest that Peter had. And when those few did come along, they didn't last, and he'd again find himself losing hope. Which was how Marlene's whole setups had come about. The exhaustion of looking for someone on his own had practically worn him down and Marlene, good friend that she was, decided to intervene. He couldn't blame her really; she'd only been trying to help. Brad had a feeling though, that these last few experiences had created damage that might not fade so easily this time.
Kevin only added to that. When they'd talked on the phone, Brad could've sworn there was warmth in that voice -- something inviting and kind. And despite all the negative thoughts he'd had about this meeting, he couldn't help but feel disappointed that the other man opted out.
The minutes ticked by longer and when he finally looked at his watch again it was 5:30. He rubbed his eyes and made a move to get up.
"Brad?"
He turned to the left where a strawberry blond haired man stood. He was dressed in jeans and black shirt and looked completely disheveled.
"You uh, fit the description of someone I'm supposed to meet. Are you Brad?"
"Yeah. Kevin?"
"Yeah! God, I can't believe I caught you. I thought you'd be long gone."
"I was just about to be," he eyed him wearily.
"I'm sorry. My car got a flat and I didn't have my cell or a spare, even. I had to walk down the highway 'til I found the first pay phone and was able to call Triple A."
"Shit. Well, I completely understand then," Brad said honestly and stood to face the man. Then came the enviable moment in which they checked each other out and Brad had to smirk. Disheveled and all, the man was attractive.
"So. About the movie," he waved a hand, and Brad noticed he had a similar smirk.
"Yeah. That idea's kinda shot, huh?"
Kevin nodded. "Listen, can I be honest with you?"
"Please do," Brad nodded, shivering at the man's intense eye contact. Something about his face just screamed honesty. It was very appealing.
"These blind dates ... well, they're just not my thing. But Marlene said I wouldn't regret this and that you were a great guy, so I said, fuck it, whatever. And yet ... I still wasn't sure so I figured I'd secure myself and pick a movie, right? That way if there's nothing there it can just be two people and another hundred or so sitting in the dark: no pressure, no forced conversation. Am I making any sense?"
Brad lowered his eyes a bit, then looked up again, refusing to let the defeat he felt within him win. "Yeah, I mean, I don't care that much for blind dates either. I can soundly say I haven't had the best of luck here."
Kevin laughed and his smile made Brad's chest hurt. "Great, great, so can we just.."
"Yeah, absolutely," Brad cut in, wanting to have the last word and get the hell out of there, "I'll just --"
" -- go somewhere and talk instead?"
Their words overlapped and Brad froze. "What?" Again, they spoke in unison and Brad got frustrated.
"No, what did you say?"
"I'd rather go someplace and talk. You seem to fall into the other category."
Brad shifted on his feet and laughed. "Jesus," he exhaled.
"What?" Kevin's mouth quirked up.
Brad simply shook his head and smiled. "Nothing. So, where do you want to go?"
Kevin looked down the street. "The Cinema Cafe?"
Brad looked in the same direction. "Sounds good."
They started walking, side by side, their arms touching slightly.
"You know, you still owe me for the movie," Brad teased.
"How about I buy you an overpriced frozen coffee of your choice and we call it even?"
"We'll see."
"That sounds ominous."
"Perhaps. If you're lucky."
"I feel lucky."
Brad smiled. "So do I."
* * * * * * * * * * * *
END