Title: Gathering of Angels
Author: Cherry Vanilla
Fandom: The West Wing
Pairing: Josh/Sam
Rating: strong R
Status: NEW, Complete 6/29/01
Spoilers: ITSOTG
Series/sequel: No
Summary: "Feel the wind and set yourself the bolder course / Keep your heart as open as a shrine / You'll sail the perfect line."
Notes: For Ellen, who kindly wanted only a story in exchange for making me a copy of ITSOTG. I told her I would try but after a few minutes her plot bunny really took me buy storm and sort of developed into something else on it's own, so here it is. I hope you like this, Ellen. And thank you.
The summary comes from "In Your Time" by Bob Seger per requested by Ellen.
The title comes from "Come Sail Away" by the Styx because I found that fitting as well.
Aditional inspirition goes to Hedwig and the Angry Itch for giving me "The Origin of Love."
***************
Sam had always loved sailing. When he was a little boy his dad would take him out on their boat called The Iris. Sam had never liked the name. Nevertheless, he'd loved the feel of the wind blowing in his hair, the cool mist of the ocean. He vowed when he was older that he'd buy his own boat and become remarkable at the act of sailing, just like his father was.
* * * * * * * * * *
He met Joshua Lyman while working as congressional aid. Upon first meeting the man he felt a shiver of desire course through him. He wasn't a novice when it came to the topic of wanting other men; he'd had few -- encounters you could say, but nothing that could ever be called a relationship, much less a boyfriend.
At the time he was a mere twenty-two year old wide-eyed 'kid' as Josh called him, just coming to Washington and subject to very corruption that the place stands for. Josh's cynical words, not his.
But he couldn't help but fall for Josh. Perhaps *because* of his cynicism, of their obviously different views on the world. And the closer they became, the harder Sam fell. He'd received an inkling that Josh possibly felt the same way but he wasn't positive and the last thing he wanted to risk was the man's friendship, much less his job.
In June, they both had vacation time coming up. Josh had suggested Florida and Sam stopped himself from letting out an incredibly adolescent 'woohoo!'
Halfway through the trip he'd decided this was a bad idea. Stupidly enough, he didn't take into account that Josh would actually be shirtless on the beach. Or that they'd be sharing a room where Josh would be walking out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel while droplets of water trickled down his body and Sam would be following those drops until they disappeared beneath the white cloth.
No, he didn't think of these things. And so on the third night of the trip he went to a bar, drank himself into oblivion, and picked up boy from New Orleans with black hair and large glasses and let himself get blown behind a club.
When he'd arrived back at the hotel, he found Josh fast asleep with a Civil Law book tucked under his arm and the covers nearly all pushed back. Sam watched his chest rise and fall and realized not even a hundred meaningless blowjobs would wash away the imprint on his brain that this man had permanently obtained.
The next day they left to go sailing, the whole way there consisting of Josh teasing him that he wouldn't play Gilligan to Sam's Skipper.
"All I'm saying is, if you start calling me your little buddy, I'm walking."
"Grouch."
"Hey, what'd you do last night?"
"Huh?" Sam rubbed his face and pretended to be vague.
"Last night, Skipper. You get lucky?" Josh leered, poking him in the ribs.
Sam tried not to lean into the touch. Get lucky? Any other time he'd certainly call getting off by something other than his own hand just that. And the boy had been pretty damn good too. Still, he couldn't bring himself to call it 'lucky.'
Sam looked over his shoulder at Josh who was looking off up at the sky, basking in the warmth of the sun, hands deep in his pockets.
Sam sighed, "No. Not lucky."
Josh made a noncommittal noise. "Too bad."
Sam really didn't feel like playing macho guys at that moment and walked a little faster.
Josh caught up to him while Sam was at the dock.
"This the S.S. Minnow?"
"Would you please shut up?"
"Any chance Ginger and Mary Ann are on board?"
"You know, the S.S. Minnow wasn't even a sailboat."
"Ah, well excuse me, oh wonder of 60's TV Trivia," Josh said, bowing sarcastically.
Sam shrugged. "I'm just saying."
Josh laughed and boarded the boat. A few minutes later they were sailing and Sam almost forgot that he was supposed to be having a lousy time.
* * * * * * *
"You really like competing in this stuff?"
"Sure, why not?" Sam was standing close to the edge of the boat, staring at the water.
"Just doesn't seem like you."
"You don't know me all that well, you know."
He could almost hear his friend shrug. He kept his eyes on the water as he heard Josh moving closer to him.
"I'd like to, you know."
Sam's breath caught in his chest as he felt Josh come up behind him, a hand gently brushing his back.
"Uh..?"
"Get to know you better," Josh added matter-of-factly. The man could at least have had the decency to get a little breathy considering that Sam was damn near sweating, he thought bitterly.
Josh's hand stroked slowly up toward his neck. Sam's last thought before he fell off the boat and into the water was that Josh had some gull to wait until they were miles away from civilization to make a pass at him.
* * * * * * * *
Sam stormed into the hotel and threw down his towel, trying to block out the small snickers that were still coming from the man behind him.
"I don't want to talk about it!"
"Sam -- you --" And he trailed off as another fit of laughter attacked him.
"You're an asshole, you know that?"
"I never," more fits of laughter, "claimed to be otherwise."
Sam rolled his eyes. "Well, you can stop now."
"I'm sorry. I'm --" he stopped to composed himself, "sorry."
"It's your fault, anyway," Sam mumbled, walking into the bathroom.
When he was dry and dressed he emerged, closing the door behind him, which he was immediately propelled against.
"Wha-" And then fiery lips assaulted his and his eyes were shut tight and he could only hope against hope that this was Josh and not some intruder who'd knocked his friend out cold and for some bizarre reason was now kissing him.
He finally gave in to the fantasy that this *was* Josh and did what he'd wanted to for months in grabbing his hair and kissing him full force, prying compliant lips open with his tongue.
Soft moans were emerging from the man's mouth and Sam kissed him even harder.
"This is -- how earlier was supposed to have gone," Josh panted against his lips.
Sam leaned his head back and Josh nipped at his chin, pressing sharp kisses against his jaw and down to his neck where he bit down hard.
"Jesus, Josh," Sam's head rolled back and forth against the door and his insistent hips rose upward against his friend's, seeking contact. It was received.
Josh pushed against him, one hand going around to Sam's ass to pull them closer together. Sam growled, something he hadn't done since he was sixteen and hard and receiving his first blowjob in Matthew Peterson's basement.
He locked his arms around Josh's back and moved them toward the bed. They landed with a loud thud and a "Shit!"
"What?" Sam panted as he lifted Josh's shirt over his head.
"Your fucking knee is digging into my hip."
Sam laughed lightly. "Sorry."
"Eh, it's worth it, I guess," Josh said, flashing his dimples and Sam dove in for another kiss lest he say all the things running through his head like 'I love you' or 'You're fucking gorgeous' or 'So you like, really want *me*?'
Apparently he did, since Josh then lifted Sam's Princeton T-shirt over his head and flung it across the room. He raked his nails up and down Sam's tanned back and Sam shuddered and pressed closer to him, mouthing his collarbone, memorizing the taste of this brilliant man. He fumbled for Josh's zipper and was soon pushed onto his back with force. A little stunned, he stared up into Josh's face where a warm smile was in place. He caressed his hand all over Sam's face and didn't say a word but Sam took it all to mean 'relax and trust me.'
He decided to do just that. Josh moved down his body where he delivered kisses and linger caresses. Sam arched his back and moaned as his nipple was engulfed and sucked on with earnest. He pet Josh's hair and murmured his sighs of contentment.
Josh's hand was working deftly at the zipper on his shorts and the mouth on his belly could almost make him block that fact out. Almost, but not quite.
Heaven came next. He knew it had to be heaven because nothing had every felt this good and yet this horrible at the same time. In that instant he knew that if this didn't work out, or worse, if it were only a one time thing he'd never be able to forget the feeling of Joshua Lyman's mouth closing gently, almost shyly around him.
He thrust upward slowly and panted Josh's name until he could hardly breathe any longer; much less speak coherently. Lips closed around him, a hot tongue danced around his hard flesh sucking him in fast and furious.
Josh's hand wandered up to Sam's lips and he sucked on the offered fingers, mimicking the blowjob he was getting and delighting in Josh's gasp.
He rocked his hips a few times more before locking his legs in completion.
His chest was heaving, his brow was dripping and his legs felt like jelly.
Josh moved up his body, placing butterfly kisses all the while and finally ending his descent on Sam's mouth.
This, Sam thought when Josh's arm curled around him and his tongue caught his own in a deep kiss, was getting lucky.
* * * * * * * *
Paradise couldn't last forever though and even an idealist like Sam knew that.
They had spent the remaining days of the trip mainly in bed or laying close but not touching on the beach. It was only a short while but it was enough to make Sam spoiled after they returned home.
He found himself wishing they were back in the hotel room where they could lay around all day in each other's arms and pretend that the rest of the world didn't exist.
Seeing Josh at the office and not being able to touch him was pure torture. And frustrating enough for both �of them that they'd attack each other as soon as they'd get to Sam's apartment.
They went on like this for a few months. Sam knew they had a 'relationship' but it still in many ways felt like their friendship, sans the sex. Which was comfortable. He also knew how much Josh's work meant to him and they had actually been able to find a balance somewhere between that. At work they were close but not too close and after hours they were anything they wanted.
We're like any couple that work together, Sam would tell himself. Most of the time he could believe it, until he'd see a man give a woman a peck on the cheek as he'd leave her office or vice versa. At times like that he'd look over at Josh and realize they'd never have that freedom and he couldn't prevent the wave of sadness.
Then came January and it was time for Sam to leave for Duke. The night before he left, he lay in Josh's arms, both of them silent and barely held himself back from tears. Josh had kissed him so slowly and passionately before they went to bed and Sam couldn't prevent one from sneaking out. Before he drifted off he said the words he'd wanted to for so long and to his surprise it only took a few seconds for Josh to say them back.
* * * * * * * *
They never mentioned it again, deciding that parting as friends was best and the least painful. It took Sam a while to fully adjust to everything but pretty soon they were back to as normal as they could get. Sam would date and Josh would date and they'd talk about their relationships on the phone or the three times a year that they'd meet up, but there was always a level of longing in their eyes or voices that neither of them even tried to conceal.
Sam would enter sailing competitions whenever his schedule would allow. Anytime he did he would think of Josh and hope that one day he could get it right and stay in the boat.
* * * * * * *
2000
Standing outside Josh's hospital room, he thought of that summer and feel of Josh's lips on his chest and his head resting against Josh's heart; the same heart that almost stopped beating tonight.
He thought that when Josh woke up, he'd tell him that maybe it was time they try sailing together again.
