(last updated:September 5th, 1998)

JUST THE BASICS:

Hi!  My name is Corey.  I am 15 years old (as of February '98---in case I don't update this for a while, I was born February 22, 1983).  I am a Sophomore in High School (10th grade).  And, yes, I'm a boy who is interested in other boys, though I don't like to describe myself as "gay".  Keep reading here and the stories at my site to see exactly what I mean.

IDENTITY CRISIS?:

When I was beginning my first year in Junior High (7th Grade---I was 12), I began to look at my fellow male classmates in a different light (you know what I mean).  At first, I didn't think much of it and would stare, though, after a while, I learned to be a little more careful.  I learned fairly quickly that these feelings were not appropriate.  I was supposed to be interested in girls like all of my friends (it seemed to me that the whole world but me was normal, or at least the rest of the school).

I developed childish crushes, some of which carried on into the 8th grade.  I resented being so out of place.  I couldn't seem to change myself and I certainly couldn't change the world.  I felt like I just had to face the fact that I would forever have to keep my feelings hidden or face a lifetime of ridicule and hatred (common place in a small town).  Sometimes I longed to be a little boy again.  My life was so simple and wonderful before all this hormonal confusion.  Strangely enough, I longed to be a young boy not unlike the boys I enjoyed watching play every Saturday.  Of course, that really confused me.  Though, later I figured out that life is really that way:  To care about someone means that, not only do you love him, but you also worry about him.  So I longed to be and yet to have; I longed to love and be loved. And I think that is all I ever really wanted.

Still, to this day, I have to take a quick glance as a cute boy passes by or a good looking classmate is sitting near by.  I thought, at first that my interests in boys couldn't be like the girls interest in them (because I liked any age of boy, not just older), but I am a very shy and quiet person (at school anyway) and many times people won't even notice me being there (or at least choose to ignore me), and so I listen in on a lot of interesting conversations.  It is through this quiet observation that I learned that girls find young boys attractive too but in a different way than boys their age (they think it's a mothering instinct).  The internet has also helped me see that my interests are not that uncommon (for example, the tv stars I think are good looking).  The only problem is that I'm not a girl.  Do I want to be a girl?  Sometimes yes (or at least I've thought about it before), but other times I just want to be normal (straight) or be a kid again.

Please email me if you can relate (or even if you can't---I love getting email, even if I don't have time to answer it for maybe days or weeks--just be patient).

All in all, I may sound like a very confused person (actually I am still a little confused), but it doesn't stop me from concentrating on the other things in my life (it just distracts me).  I may not be too sure of who I am, but I do know what I like, and the internet is a sorta outlet for my interests and my creative side too.

WHAT I LOOK LIKE (Added August 7, 1998)

None of the pictures you see here at my site are me. I don't have a scanner, I just collect pictures. Anyway, I have sandy blond (dark blond or light brown) hair, though I used to have light blond hair when I was young. I have sky blue (pale or light blue) eyes, though they used to be a nice deap blue. I'm a little under 5'4" and weigh around 100 pounds.

MY INTERESTS (BESIDES BOYS) (Added August 6, 1998)

I enjoy writing and drawing mostly (both using paper and using the computer). To see some of the things I have written, check out my stories page.

EMAIL DO'S AND DON'TS (Added August 7, 1998)

The following are sugestions for you if you're wondering what to write to me. I really do like hearing from people, so the do's are here to help you get started. The don'ts are just good advice.:

DO:

--Tell me your name or what you would like to be called (for example, instead of "anonamous", you could be John).

--Please include your age.

--If you feel comfortable doing so, I would like to know what part of the world you live in (and its time difference to California would also be nice).

--Tell me your interests (such as hobies).

MOST IMPORTANT: Please be honest, friendly, and polite.

DON'T:

--Tell me the exact town you live in (unless you feel like it's really ok for you to tell me--remember internet safety).

--Send me any descriptions or links to descriptions of activities you know I shouldn't read. (If you know what I'm talking about, don't send it!).

--Send me pictures of things I shouldn't see (it hasn't happened yet, and I want to keep it that way).
 

GENERAL INFORMATION: (Updated August 8, 1998)

Favorite Color: aqua (blue/green) or blue or green (as separate colors)

Favorite Food: Pizza (almost any kind, but mostly just plain cheese pizza)

Musical Tastes: Classical, mello modern, and oldies (mostly 50s)

Favorite Subjects: Art and Creative Writing

General Location: I live in California.

Shoe Size: 9

Brothers or Sisters: None in real life, but one older brother on the internet.
 

THE BOYS I LIKE

As you look around my site, you will see the types of boys I like.  I found them at various spots all over the web.  Out of all the pictures I've seen, I like these the best.  These may not be your particular tastes, but this is my site, so why would they (For reference, I added an something interesting about Beauty to my stories page).  I'm always open to suggestions on how to improve my site and I'll even take advice (or give advice) on life and its unusual twists and turns.