Oprah and Molestors
The below was sent to me by Lysi:
http://www.oprah.com/tows/pastshows/200302/tows_past_20030225.jhtml
Is There a Child Molester In Your Neighborhood?
The show was pretty good, although the more I think about Jake (the
molester) and his persona, the less sure I am that he'll be able to
keep
his vow to never molest again. There was a certain arrogance about him
that now makes me wonder if he is soooo arrogant that he'll try to
molest
while being the most publicly recognized pedophile in the country. I
hope that I can find the show again and tape it. He did have some
interesting suggestions for keeping children safer, though.
I found a couple of Oprah's "opening statements" statistics startling
(and I don't know the source or the accuracy):
1. There are 410,000 registered sex offenders in this country. This
represents 3% (that's right--3%) of the actual number.
2. One in every 20 men is a child molester.
Jake Goldenflame was Oprah's guest and he is a convicted molester. He
molested his dau. from ages 3-5. His "ideal victims" are boys in their
very early teens, though. His own molestation took place when he was
about 13. He had molested A BUNCH (I forget how many, maybe a couple
hundred?) of boys...mostly strangers...before he got arrested. During
the time he was molesting, he was working as a paralegal handling
mostly
cases involving child sex abuse. He admitted he would have never
stopped
molesting had he not been arrested and jailed. Jake has been out of
jail,
and has not molested, for 12 yrs. He is extremely open about his
"proclivity" and made some excellent points about molesters and
their place in society. These are some of the main points he made (I've
used masculine pronouns for simplicity):
1. A molester cannot be "cured" BUT, like an alcoholic, a molester
can be "in recovery". He must participate in the sex offender
treatment
his prison/jail offers; following his release, it is imperative that he
continue some kind of addiction or offender support therapy, though
maybe
not weekly, for the rest of his life.
2. For a molester to be in, and stay in, recovery, it is imperative
that
he admit his addiction to himself AND to everyone with whom he develops
ANY kind of relationship (neighbor, friend, worker, etc.).
3. When a molester self-discloses to his neighbors, co-workers,etc.,
the "secret" is taken away... others are then able to actively protect
children from the molester AND protect the molester from children. This
isn't placing blame on kids, it's helping keep an addict away from
his "drug of choice" which is kids.
Jake lives in an adults-only apartment building. When he
discovered
that the on-site building manager had a 5 yr old daughter,he went to
the
manager and said "There's something about me and my past I think you
have
the right to know. I molested my own dau. from ages 3-5 and I've
molested other children as well. I've been to prison, am in ongoing
therapy, and have not molested in 12 yrs. I deliberately chose this
building in an effort to not have children around me. But since you
have
a young daughter who lives here, I thought you should know about my
past."
His neighbors with whom he has become friendly, even just a little
friendly, have all been informed too, in a manner to his disclosure to
the building manager, since they might have friends/family with kids
who
might visit the building. He says it's important to help the molester
avoid kids as well as helping kids avoid molesters.
4. A molester has a duty to avoid any place where children are likely
to
be, especially where the kids are likely not to be intensely
supervised.
If he cannot avoid one of these places, like a mall, he should go only
when accompanied by another adult who is NOT a molester, who knows the
molester IS a molester, and who understands why the molester thinks it
best to not go to this place alone.
5. If a molester serves jail time, he has only paid a PAST LEGAL DEBT
to
society. He retains a PRESENT and FUTURE LEGAL and MORAL DUTY to
society
to not re-offend. He can never forget, ignore, or minimize this
on-going
DUTY and he must take whatever steps are necessary for him to fulfill
his
responsibility/duty.
6. Molesters should never consider themselves "EQUALS" in society.
They
can be no more than GUESTS in any part of society where there are
children. They are GUESTS in the neighborhoods in which they live,
work
and visit. They have no "rights" that can supercede the "right" of
children to be safe. Molesters have no "RIGHT" to be allowed into
places,
such as parks, where kids are, they have a DUTY to society to avoid
such
places. They have no "right" to be ANY place where kids are or might
be.
7. If more molesters could be up front, honest, and open about their
molesting behavior,understand and remain cognizant of how devastating
molestation is to a child, admit that their deviant behavior/addiction
is
their responsibility to control, and make that responsibility their #1
priority, there could be less anxiety about where molesters live and
work. Until that happens, though, there should be MORE anxiety about
their presence.
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