| I'm sure you'll find this very insightful. |
| Corey kept a fairly comprehensive journal while on his mission to the Netherlands, and as he was recently was perusing its worn pages, he realized that much of the wisdom therein contained could be shared with others for their benefit. He hopes that you can learn from what he learned. And if not, just enjoy this. |
| On Arguing With Companions "Sometimes it's NOT good to throw in my two cents with everything. Instead, use a nickel, or even better, a Canadian nickel. Those aren't worth anything." On Mission Food "Mentos and soda make a great breakfast." On Marriage/Girls "In the event that I do get married, which in itself would be a spectacular playing of the odds, then I wouldn't remember how I was going to finish off this subordinate clause. "Lately I've been having a lot of girl problems. See, as a missionary I'm not allowed to have any girls. And I find that a problem." "What I need is a girl who thinks the 'inside' of me is more important than the 'outside.' Maybe I'll find a nice blind girl." "I CAN'T WAIT TO GET MARRIED. I can't wait to have one bed and two toothbrushes and two towels and a dog. I think that I'm going to get a dog when I get married." On Staying In Shape "I've gained some weight since I came on my mission. I weighed myself tonight and found out that I'm bigger than I had previously thought. That is not a good thing. Maybe I could just start getting up early and doing a little exercising before I begin the day. Maybe I could stop eating fatty delicious stuff, too. [And] as long as I'm doing that, I could just perfect time travel and finish my perpetual motion maching!" On Humor "Today it was sooooooooooo windy that it wasn't even funny. I guess that I could have laughed, but I was too busy BEING BLOWN OVER to do that." On Exercising Authority And Power "I should also note that I'm now a district leader. This fits into my plans perfectly - I'm one step closer to taking over the mission." On Holidays Away From Home "Well, today is Halloween. I think that Halloween is the hardest holiday to enjoy when away from home. Do you know what I mean? All the family getting together, all of the singing, the opening of presents, etc. It's just kind of rough for me. Wait a second - that's Christmas. Never mind." On Buying Quality Goods "I got a new bike helmet. See, when I was in Enschede, I accidentally broke my helmet by testing its strength and durability. It turns out that it wasn't strong and not exactly durable." On Canadians "The other day an investigator asked me if I was Canadian. I said no, and I told her that Canadians smell funny and stole hockey from America." On The English Language "------ is an.... inactive member with whom we speak English. [Her] English is really good, except for two things: 1. She hasn't figured out that every sentence which comes out of her lips does not need to end in "you know?" and 2. She hasn't yet realized that English, along with its future and present tenses, also has a past tense." On Dutch Idiosynchrasies "Things in Den Helder are pretty good. Today we had a baptism, actually. It was an eight year old boy who's name is -----. His full name is ----- -----, and if you say it like the Dutch people say it, it sounds like a name off Star Wars. There was a lot of controversy here ever since we started letting mothers baptize their sons. But after a while the fire calmed down and things have just been going smoothly since then." On Lack Of Athleticism While On A Mission "Every Tuesday night we play basketball with the Almelo Elders, a member, and a couple of non-members. Last Tuesday was the first week since we've restarted after summer vacation. Only the Elders and the member showed up at the beginning, so we played a soccer-like game where everyone has a pin (kind of like a bowling pin) and you have to try to kick the ball to knock over the pins of the other players. Easy enough, right? I didn't find out until Tuesday night, however, that I don't have any coordination in my legs. In fact, they, if completely severed from my torso, could live a very meaningful life without the help of the rest of my body. I didn't think that it would be hard to have my feet simply coincide with a small round object, especially if that small round object was directly in front of me. But apparently that was too much to ask." "Today we ran home from our church building after doing some service. The building is only one mile, shin splints, and a collapsed right lung away from our house." On Being Grateful "As I was studying this morning, I really began to realize that there are a lot of things fro which I am thankful; things for which I never knew I would be so thankful: like my family, my friends, the chance that I have to be on a mission, and, of course, that I'm not a leper." |
| *For the most part, these quotations are taken directly from Corey's journal or letters that he wrote to friends/family (which he considers part of his journal). No corrections were made, except to clarify or to protect the innocent. |