50 Things Admissions Never Told You About College
1.  Quarters are gold.
2.  Two meals per day is the standard.
3.  Road trip whenever possible.
4.  Going to the mailbox was never an ego booster/breaker before.
5.  You will begin to nap again.
6.  Your bookstore bill will almost equal tuition.
7.  Squirt guns = Stress relief.
8.  Instant Messenger becomes and addiction.
9.  E-mail becomes your second language.
10. College students throw paper airplanes too.
11. You never realized that so many people were smarter than you.
12. College football is the coolest thing on the planet.
13. Western Europe could be wiped out by a horrible plague and you wouldn't know, but          you can recite last weeks re-run on The Simpsons verbatim.
14. Cartoons are for all ages, especially Scooby Doo.
15. Disney movies are more than just classics.
16. You will never rent more movies in your life.
17. No one is too old for video games.
18. Procrastination is an art form.
19. SNOOD is more addicting than pot.
20. Thanks to Aimster/Audiogalaxy/Morpheus/Kazaa, you will never listen to one of your           CDs ever again.
21. It never sucked so much to get sick.
22. The health service nurses are there because they couldn't hack it at a real hospital.            Never, don't ever forget that.
23. Care packages are right up there with birthdays.
24. Campus is only clean for Family Weekend and Freshman Orientation.
25. Nothing you want to register for will be open.
26. Classes.... the later the better.
27. You are no longer thankful that the fire alarms are here to protect you.
28. Jeans may be worn as many times as the wearer desires.
29. The only time to dress up is when your jeans are dirty.
30. Showers become less importan;t, sleep becomes more important.
31. Asleep by 2:30 a.m. is an early night.
32. Creativity in the dining halls is key...
33. The freshman 15 is NOT a myth!!!
34.  If it's snowing out, the only reason you will leave your room is for food.
35. Dishes smell after days of piling up.
36. Cereal makes a meal any time of the day.
37. You will eat anywhere that is a buffet.
38. You will eat anythign that is free.
39. New additions to food groups:  ramen and pizza.
40. Stealing from the dining hall will become second nature.
41. ATM's are the devil's advocate.  ATM = Another Twenty Missing.
42. Keys have never been so important, yet you seem to lose them or lock yourself out of        the room even more.
43. Duct tape heals all wounds.
44. If they say you can't have it in your dorm, they are just kidding.
45. You will come to had hallways/elevators with a passion.
46. Everyone is nice for the first week.  After that, no one is interested in you and they              won't smile back.  Get used to it.
47. You are never alone!
48. You realize collge is the ideal lifestyle, except for those pesky classes.
BEFORE I CAME TO COLLEGE, I WISH I HAD KNOWN...
That it didn't matter how late I scheduled my first class, I'd still sleep through it.

That I could change so much and barely realize it.

That you can love a lot of people in a lot of different ways.

No matter how "cool" you were in high school, no one here cares.

That if you wear polyester everyone will ask why you are so dressed up.

That every clock on campus shows a different time.

That if you were smart in high school, so what?  It doesn't matter here.

That I would go to a party the night before a final.

That Chem Labs/Architecture Studios take up more time than all my other classes put together.

That you can know everything and fail a test.

That you can know nothing and ace a test.

That Psychology is really Biology, that Biology is really Chemistry, that Chemistry is really Physics and Physics is really Math.


Go Home
Go To Funny Index
Hosted by www.Geocities.ws

1