| Vacation Translations |
| What vacation resorts say.............and what they really mean. |
| Old World charm.....................................................no bath |
| Tropical........................................................................rainy |
| Majestic setting....................................a long way from town |
| Options galore.................nothing is included in the itinerary |
| Secluded hideaway......................impossible to find or get to |
| Pre-registered rooms...................................already occupied |
| Explore on your own................................pay for it yourself |
| No extra fees.........................................................No extras |
| Nominal fee............................................Outrageous charge |
| Standard........................................................Sub-Standard |
| Deluxe...................................................................Standard |
| Superior................................................one free shower cap |
| All the amenities.................................two free shower caps |
| Plush................................................top and bottom sheets |
| Gentle breezes.........................occasional Gale force winds |
| Light and airy.....................................no air conditioning |
| Picturesque.........................................Theme park nearby |
| Open bar.....................................................free ice cubes |