| I'm not saying she's easy, but..... |
| She's been on her knees more times than Billy Graham She's been laid on more kitchen floors than linoleum She's done more screwing than Black & Decker She's responsible for more merry men than Robin Hood She's turned more tricks than Harry Houdini She's been boarded more times than Amtrak She's been mounted more times than Trigger She's been involved with more animals than Marlin Perkins She's entertained more troops than Bob Hope She's been at more bedsides than Dr. Kildare She's been turned more ways than a Rubik's cube She's spent more time under men than barstools She's seen more traffic than the George Washington Bridge She's had more turnovers than the International House of Pancakes She's been under more sheets than the Ku Klux Klan She's had more marines land on her than Iwo Jima Her body has been declared a national recreation area Her diaphrams come with a service contract She has an IUD with a beeper She uses industrial strength douche Her gynecologist entered her in a Grand Canyon look-alike contest Her underwear is by rubbermaid Her pantyhose has a pet door She was once hospitalized for six months after a truck driver mistook her for the Holland Tunnel |