I like looking good. I don't like automatic gunfire.

A conundrum of mine: Flak jackets are ugly, dress suits are cool.

What to do? What to do?

Enter Miguel Caballero, self-proclaimed designer of 'bulletproof fashion'. His collection includes blazers, raincoats, and suede garments. Some of his products are snug with stab-proof material. This shields your jewels from harm. To many refined individuals, this is an incredibly important feature.

For the super-elite, comes some super-affordable protection. $7,500 buys you a polo shirt and 9mm slugs will become your 4th concern when on the lookout for everyday dangers. Pay an extra $2,300 and micro-uzis will now sometimes work. A personal favourite of mine comes in the form of a sleek leather jacket. At a brisky 2.6 pounds, it doesn't scream "bulletproof". However, all that swankiness and eye catching shininess does scream "vandalize me." Keep in mind that while bullets may not work, knuckles and unconventional weaponry (I have very loud friends) will still annoy the hell out of you.

Caballero clothing has actually attracted some high-profile clients. King Abdullah of Jordan, Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez and even Stephen Segal have dabbled. But let it be known: Segal really doesn't need armour protection. As proven in his earlier films, bullets are useless against the man who kicks very high. And oopsies. Try not to get blood, or horrible stains on Caballero clothing... the suits are dry-clean only.