[strange] love:

The Depeche Mode show in Cleveland, Ohio. Singles tour. Not a night I'm soon to forget. There are those events in life that startout as one exciting thing and end up having a side story to them that is even bigger. This was one of those events.

Sunday, November 8, 1998. My best friend Kiley and my sack-of-poo ex-boyfriend who shall remain nameless [okay, let's call him Poop] set off on a 5-hour journey from our hometown of Cincinnati to the glorious industrial city of Cleveland to see the band of bands, DEPECHE MODE. It was a cold, grey, drizzly afternoon -perfect!- and I was freezing in my black miniskirt and fishnet stockings.. but hey, it was a dM show! There was another reason for my choice of clothing however... Depeche Mode related in a roundabout way.... meanwhile, in Cleveland...

... my OTHER best friend, Paul, from London, was already getting ready for the show in a hotel with his friend Sarah from Indiana. Paul and I had started talking on AOL in June of that same year, and we got on so well, he came out to Cincinnati to meet me and see our favorite band. The sad thing was... the tickets were bought on different days, so our seats were in separate sections, and as a result of something that had happened the Friday before, I was very sad about that indeed.

We entered Gund Arena -Kiley, Poop, and me- and I immediately began looking for my dear friend. I paced the arena about 6 times before it was time for Stabbing Westward to come on, who I gladly would have missed to find Paul, but Poop had to see this band live. So.. we went in, only missing about 2 minutes of their set... however...

...as expected, as soon as they were saying their 'Get ready for Depeche Mode' stuff, I was out into the masses of people again, looking for Paul! You may be starting to wonder why I was so interested in this guy.... I mean, you're thinking, 'He's just a friend, right?'.... WRONG! WRONG! Damn wrong! The Friday before the concert, Paul and I kissed, a very sweet, spontaneous kiss... and that was when I fully realised how IN LOVE with him I was! So you see, having seats in different sections of the arena was not what I had in mind!

Okay, sadly, I didn't find him then either. Between my 'MARTIN!!!!!!!!!!WHOOOO I LOVE YOU!!!'s and 'WHOOOOO!!! DAVE! YEAHHH!'s, I was missing Paul terribly. During 'Only When I Lose Myself' I was near pining for him... throughout 'In Your Room' I was near tears. I sang my heart out during 'Enjoy the Silence' - the loudest I have ever sung in my life! ... I waved my arms during 'Never Let Me Down Again'... shouted during 'Personal Jesus'... wondering the whole time what Paul was up to... Though I appeared to be having the time of my life on the outside- and mind you, I was having fun, come on, it's Depeche Mode!- I was frantic on the inside, looking over towards section 124 every chance I could get! Kiley could see this. Poop could not. When Martin sang 'Somebody' I was nearly violent keeping Poop from touching me, wishing I was with my true love in section 124.

Yeah yeah, so that was all a little sappy, but looking back, there was a lot of humour there too..

So, the concert ended, and I went out to find Paul again!! This time, thankfully, I was successful. Seeing Paul again, looking happy and... sweaty, actually... from dancing, made me want to snog [for those of you who do NOT know what that means - it is passionate kissing, making out if you will, in British *g*] him right there... but of course I couldn't because Poop did not know what had happened on Friday, so it was a very difficult situation.

There was another obstacle in my way- Sarah! Standing 5'11" in her boots, looking like she could break me in half [she could if she wanted to!], and placing herself between Paul and me, Sarah the Menacing scared the hell out of me! We were intrduced... Katey the Mouse and Sarah the Menacing.. me managing a feeble 'Hi, nice to meet you..' from somewhere behind Kiley and Poop, and Sarah with a growling 'hi'. Shit. I was going to be killed. I thought Paul and Sarah had somehow become an item in the 2 days since the lovely kiss in the hotel room.. the kiss I thought was so special..

I was nearly in tears! How could any of this be happening at the Depeche Mode concert?! The concert that was supposed to bring Paul and me together! So, for lack of any other plan, I played the Drama Queen. I said 'we have to go', and watched Paul walk away...

... but just as he reached the doors to the outside.. to the scary unfamiliar city that was Cleveland, I ran after him. 'Wait!!' I shouted, and he did! He turned and we met somewhere in the middle, in a little unoccupied corner.. and I said.... 'Hi'. Yes, okay, not the best choice of words.. but he knew what I was feeling.. We hugged, and he told me to call him when we got back to Kiley's.

So Kiley, Poop and I began our journey home. At the Waffle House on the way back to Cincy, and in the car.. I was scrawling something on the back of one of my notebooks. Kiley asked me what it was while Poop was in a gas station paying. I showed her. It was the lyrics to 'Only When I Lose Myself'- Paul's and my song even as friends. It had come to mean so much more than it did initially, and at that time it was my only consolation. I told my dear friend that I was dating one guy and totally not in love with him, but with someone else.. she understood! The rest of the way home, Kiley and I sang Depeche Mode songs at the top of our lungs, keeping my secret from Poop for the time being.

.... And then ...

So... that was the night. It was not, however, the end of the story! This is a Depeche Mode romance! It doesn't end there! Oh no! When we got back to Kiley's apartment, it was 7 am. Poop's car proved to not be able to handle the journey to Cleveland and back, so he was outside looking under the hood, where the engine was smoking. I ran for the phone. Dialled. 'Hello?' It was Sarah! Holy bejeebies! 'Is this Paul's room?' I asked her defensively. 'Yes he's here, hold on'... 'Hello?' (sexy male English voice) 'Hi' (mousy little American shy female voice). I told Paul I needed to talk to him when he got back to Cincinnati. He thought we needed to talk as well...

... so... we did! I went to his hotel room the next day, and told him all of my true feelings for him. Miracle of miracles, he felt the same! Very shortly afterwards, I decided it was best to get rid of Poop, and try to work on a relationship with my precious Paul. Well...

In January 1999, Paul visited me again in Ohio... and a miracle occured - he proposed to me! I moved to England in September '99 and it's been all go since ... Yes that's right fellow Moders [and anyone else remotely interested], we're MARRIED now - as of January 29, 2000 - which is why I had to type my testameent of the wonders of DM bringing two people together - two people separated by an ocean, a culture, a background .. a decade! [teehee!]

And another note.. Sarah the Menacing? She's one of my best friends in the whole world!! Paul and Sarah were never romantically involved, she was just trying to protect him from ME! HAHAHAHAHA... She wanted to make sure I really loved him because she didn't want him to get hurt. A very good friend indeed.... I'm proud to say she's now mine as well!

So, any fellow Devotees, that is my Depeche Mode romance. You never know- it could happen to you!!

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