poly

Polyamory means different things to different people... and I'll be the first to admit that the term polyamory doesn't quite fit... but it's the closest term I've found yet to describe what I believe is the best relationship model FOR ME. I'm not trying to convince anyone to become poly.. I'm just being open just in case someone reading this happens to feel the same way, but never knew what it was called and thought they were all alone.

I do believe that all relationships should have "rules". Just some basic guidelines to ensure fairness to all parties involved. The guideines are constantly evolving because we are constantly growing. That is why it is vital to COMMUNICATE constantly. Because of the guidelines, we are able to enjoy each other's company and the things that we do have in common, with no expectations, no preconceptions and no false hope. And since we love one another, we encourage each other to pursue our own lives which will naturally include other partners whom we may or may not be physically intimate. It's not about having sex... it's about love and trust and all the things that go with it.

I want to make it very clear that I'm NOT anti-monogamy.. just as I'm not anti-asparagus. Some people like asparagus, some don't. Wouldn't it be absurd for me to say that no one should eat asparagus just because I don't like it? It's just as absurd as telling people they HAVE to eat it, whether they like it or not just because it's always been done that way. Some people are naturally monogamous and I think it's a wonderful idea if you have a partner who is also naturally monogamous and not a parther who just pretends to be. The simple fact is that monogamy doesn't work for me and it never ever will.

The love I feel for someone doesn't die. It may mellow and fade with time (loving someone but not being IN LOVE with them), but it's always there and it saddens me that so many people waste so much time trying to bury it and deny it. Instead I think that we need to embrace the fact that we have the capacity to share so much love.!

Well, I've never been one to do something just because that's the way it's been done. I just asked myself why should I pretend to be something I'm not and couldn't come up with an answer. So I decided to do a little research to see if I was the only one who felt it's downright wrong to be expected to choose. And guess what? I happened upon a personal web page very similar to this one and discovered that I'm NOT the only one who feels this way!

Here are some links to help you on your quest for information and education. When visiting websites, and talking with others in the poly community, I pray that you keep in mind that everyone has different views on different things. What works for one family, doesn't necessarily mean it works for everyone.

Actually you should keep that in mind no matter WHAT topic you are researching! If anyone tries to tell you the "RIGHT WAY", they are full of themselves. There are as MANY ways to love as there are people who love.... Only you know exactly who you are.. and you are the only one who knows what is right for you As long as you follow your heart, you will never go wrong.

What is Polyamory?

I need to add that this was MY discovery and my opinions that I formed more than 15 years before I met Shawn, so will you PLEASE stop with the e-mails informing me that I'm being used and manipulated or abused and violated? I am old enough to know what is right for me.
Your opinion of what is right for me is completely irrelevant.

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