1. If you try to be nice to a Yankee, he or she will just think you're weird.
2. If you say, "Hi" to a Yankee, he will look at you right in the eyes and not say a word.
3. Yankees try to be sophisticated and are not very down to earth. Therefore the only way Yankees know how to have fun is to get drunk.
4. Yankees don't bond together very well. They have no sense of team work whatsoever because they are very selfish. If one of their friends, coworkers or team mates is killed or injured, they just laugh at him.
5. If you sit down and visit with a Yankee for an hour or two and then you see him a week later, he will say, "Who are you? What is your name?"
6. If a Yankee hears something funny and laughs real hard, a minute later he will completely have forgotten what he was laughing at. They only live in the moment and have no interest in the past or future.
7. Yankees are very susceptible to peer pressure. They are not independently minded and they just believe what everybody else believes. They just go with the flow. If you've met one Yankee you've met them all.
8. Yankees have little common sense and have to have an "expert" teach them everything, even something like how much to feed their dog.
9. In the North you are considered weird until proven normal.
10. If you agree to meet a Yankee at a certain time and certain place, he will either be really late or not show up at all.
11. If a Yankee borrows something from you, you have to remind him to return it.
12. Yankees don't even know their neighbors.
13. If you wave to a Yankee, he will think you're crazy.
14. Yankees are always in a hurry.
15. Yankees love money.
16. Because Yankees only live in the moment, they always wait until the last second to change lanes.
17. If you say something like, "Nice day isn't it?" to a Yankee, he might respond, "Whaeot?"
18. Because Yankees don't believe in anything, they are very cynical and sarcastic. They despise everything that is wholesome and pure.
19. If a Southerner is thinking about talking to somebody, he will say, "Maybe I should talk to him." A Yankee would say, "Maybe I should try some kind of contact."
20. Yankees don't trust each other.
21. One reason Yankees have no sense of team work is because they are all in secret competition with each other.
22. If a Yankee tells you to call him, when you call him, he wonders why your calling him.
23. If a Yankee tells you that he will call you, he won't call.
24. If a Yankee goes hiking in a park with two friends, and suddenly a boulder is rolling down a hill
towards them, the Yankee will just run without warning his friends.
25. If a Yankee sees someone lying on a sidewalk hurt or sick, he will just walk right on by him.
26. Yankees don't like direct communication so they communicate by using jokes.
27. If a Yankee sees his neighbor struggling, he won't try to help him. He will just stare at him.
28. Yankees gain respect from each other by being rude.
29. Yankees have small minds and big egos.
30. A Yankee neighbor will just cough instead of saying, "Hi".
31. Each summer when the weather is very hot, Yankees newspapers inform their readers to drink plenty fluids and stay in the shade. A Southern hound dog already knows to do that so he doesn't need to read the paper.
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War Between The States