Hello.  My name's Dave, and I find the subject of homosexuality titillating and amusing.  For my money, there are few things funnier than the concept of a man having a sexual relationship with another man. 

Don't get me wrong, I am by no means a homophobiac.  As a matter of fact, I am grateful for homosexuality, since it provides me with much mirth.  It is to gays and gayness that I owe my ability to consistently raise a laugh from my friends in the pub, be it by the jocular implication that one of our number may themselves be a homosexualist, or perhaps with my popular impression of a person of alternative sexuality, complete with voice and mannerisms.

In homosexuality I have discovered a rich seam of comedic gold, and I mine it to the full.  My ears are always listening for any reference to a gay celebrity, whose poovery I can then use to comic advantage.  Take, as an example, Popular Idol Will Young, or as I have dubbed him, Will Gay.  Wittily replacing his surname in this way serves two purposes.  Firstly, it reminds everyone of his queerity, a fact which is important generally, and vitally important if I am to continue to use his sexuality to elicit guffaws from my chums.  Secondly, it serves to amuse, since the fact that this gentleman has a sexual predilection for other males is, inherently, piss funny.  I consider this nominal replacement a more elegant device than simply stating "He's a bender, he is!" though of course this second approach is also steeped in hilarity.

I hope I have assuaged any fears you may have had that I am some sort of mindless bigot.  If I haven't, then I'd wager that you're a puff yourself.
Gays Are Funny
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