nailgunmassacre

This is surely one of the most retarted films ever made. That being said, I have to admit that it's highly enjoyable! Nail Gun Massacre is a Futuristic Films Production, a company that is comprised of the two directors - Terry Lofton and Bill Leslie. As a matter of fact, Lofton and Leslie do just about everything on this film! There are no bones to made about it though; this movie has no identity crisis. Never does this film attempt to be something it isn't, and because of that we have an extremely enjoyable and stupid 90 minute movie.

You should probably know what you're getting into from one look at the cover of this movie. It's a hand drawn picture of the killer from the movie who looks like a cross between GI Joe's Snake Eyes and a reject from Night School. He's holding a nail gun (with a bright yellow curly power chord attached to his belt) over two dead bodies. To top it all off, the tag line 'A Very Penetrating Story' is included for your viewing pleasure!

The movie itself is very similar. We open with one of the silliest rape scenes this side of I Spit on Your Grave. From there the plot gets a little thin as we are treated to extended chase and murder scenes and some gratuitous nudity. The murders are pretty hilarious as the killer skulks around and rips off some pretty awful one liners ('Nailed you!') and cackles madly. It gets even better; his voice is distorted through a cheap distortion unit to make it sound all deep and scary! The nudity is just as ridiculous. The girls are typical 80s fare, big hair, tan lines - the whole nine yards (not that this is a omplaint!). Lofton and Leslie obviously knew what kind of movie they had on their hands and played it up as much as possible while keeping a somewhat straight face to avoid falling into the pitfalls of most straightforward parodies. They were wise in putting together a silly synthesized score to go along with all this madness. All together, this is a perfect package for a rowdy late night movie with a group of people.

Right now Nail Gun Masscre is long is long out of print. If you have sharp eyes though you can probably find it for a few dollars in a used bin at some older video stores. The old video that I watched was released by Magnum Entertainment in 1987. Magnum was pretty great company while it lasted, releasing some of the oddest titles throughout the 80s and early 90s. Hopefully most of their titles will find a new life on DVD. This title would be a perfect acquisition for Anchor Bay or Image's Something Weird Video if they want to move into the 80s territrory more fully. Until then though, I'll have to be content with my beat up video (which is not without its charm) and wish I had the silly song that they play over and over on a cd!