One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him,
"My elbow hurts like hell. I guess
I better see a doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.
"There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just give it a
urine sample and the computer will tell
you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars... a hell of a lotcheaper
than a doctor."
So Jack
deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to the
drugstore. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the
urine sample. He pours the sample into
the slot and waits.Ten seconds later, the
computer ejects a printout:
.....You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm
in warm water and avoid heavy activity.
It will improve in two
weeks................
That evening, while thinking about how
amazing this new technology was, Jack
began wondering if the computer could be
fooled.
He mixed some tap water with his urine, added
a little stool sample from his dog,
added urine samples from his wife and daughter, then masturbated into the mixture for good measure.
Jack hurries back to the drugstore, eager to see what the computer
will come up with. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his
concoction, and awaits the test results.
The
computer took a little longer this time, but finally printed out the following:
.....1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a
water softener.
.....2. Your dog has Roundworms. Administer
25cc of Liqui-Vict 2x
.....3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit.
Get her into rehab.
.....4.
Your wife is pregnant... twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a
Lawyer.
.....5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never
get better.