TWO NEW ADDITIONS TO
THE PERIODIC TABLE OF ELEMENTS
Element Name: WOMANIUM
Symbol: WO
Atomic Weight: (don't even go there)
Physical
properties: Generally soft and round in
form. Boils at nothing
and may freeze any
time. Melts when treated properly. Very bitter if not
used well.
Chemical
properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong
affinity with gold,
silver, platinum, and precious stones.
Violent when
left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic
food. Turns slightly
green when placed
next to a better specimen.
Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of
wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing
agent known.
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands!
Element Name: MANIUM
Symbol: XY
Atomic Weight: (180 +/- 50)
Physical
properties: Solid at room temperature,
but gets bent out of
shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure
sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to
conduct electricity as
easily as young
samples.
Chemical
properties: Attempts to bond with WO
any chance it can get.
Also tends to form
strong bonds with itself. Becomes
explosive when mixed
with KD (Element:
CHILDIUM) for prolonged period of time.
Neutralize by
saturating with
alcohol.
Usage: None known.
Possibly good methane source.
Good samples are able
to produce large
quantities on command.
Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly
decomposes and begins
to smell.