There has been no sign of anyone and I am discouraged. I know what the Big Man said, but we have seen no one that might be able to help us and I feel lost. Priscilla has gone in search of other food stores. If she were here, she would tell me to put away my worried thoughts, but fear taunts me as I consider that I might be on a foolish errand. What was I thinking to leave the only home I had ever known to follow some illusion? I want to believe I have hope of discovering my family, but we have traveled far up the river and still there is no one. If it were not for Priscilla, I would be back in the Shire and running home, but she has given up much in deciding to follow me and I cannot help but think I must honor her choice. After all, I helped her make it.
It was just last evening that I sat under the Brandywine Bridge with Priscilla Goldworthy at my side. The sun was about an hour away from setting and as I finished the last crumbs of the bread and cheese Priscilla had handed me, I kept my eyes fixed upon her still frame. I was feeling a terrible mixture of joy and guilt. I was overjoyed she was with me, but the stinging words that I had spoken to her tortured my mind. Why had I yelled at her like that? I had allowed my imprudent pride to sway me again into an uproar. I had been so quiet my entire life, solitude having been forced upon me, that I surprised even myself with my outbursts of the last two days. I felt ashamed of them and especially of losing one on this dear lass who for some unknown reason had resolved to follow me on my quest. I was just contemplating how she must have felt at my shameful words when she stirred. I gulped down the last piece of cheese and turned my head away. I heard her sit up and then a rather large yawn reached my ears.
�So, have you finished?�
Did I have to turn and look at her? I did not want to, but it would have been impolite to answer without facing her. I turned back and all I managed was a nod. I had meant to speak, but no words came out.
"Good. It�s time we moved on.� She seemed eager to leave the Shire. Why I could not guess. She had everything here. She had no reason to let it go. Could it possibly be because of me and only me? My heart leapt at the thought, but I ignored it.
She had just begun to reorganize the pack she had brought when finally I overcame my dry mouth and cracked out, �I�m sorry.�
She stopped packing and looked up at me straight into my eyes. Oh those emeralds! I swallowed, but I couldn�t look away.
�About what?�
I opened my mouth and managed a stammer. �For yelling� Sorry.�
All of a sudden she smiled brightly. �I know.� Her voice had become sweet and soft. I grinned stupidly back at her.
�Still,� her bite was back, �You needn�t have shouted so loudly. I�m sure the whole Shire heard and I don�t want them to know anything about my leaving until it�s too late.�
I was about to ask what she meant, but she continued on too quickly for me.
�Where are we going anyway, Pady? Now that you�ve finally found your voice, I�d like to know more about why you left so promptly. Millie didn�t know much when I visited her and she was so choked up from crying I could hardly understand anything but that you had gone for good and something about the Brandywine.�
Another twinge of guilt panged inside me. Poor Millie! Why hadn�t I ever taken notice of her? Why had I missed her caring for me? I didn�t have much time to contemplate Mille, though, for Priscilla was staring at me waiting for an explanation.
"Eh�� How much should I say? How much did she know? I decided to test the waters. �Up the Brandywine. I was told to go there by a� a friend.�
�That�s all they told you?�
I nodded.
�Strange friend.�
She had no idea how strange!
�Why?�
Part of me was relieved. She didn�t know about my family. But now I had a new problem, one I hadn�t considered yet: I didn�t know how much to tell her. Should I reveal the secret of the Proudfeet or let it lie? In some ways I wanted to let it roll off my tongue and gush out. I had shouted it unwisely at Botho, but the urge I had now was to tell it calmly, fully and completely to this beautiful lass. I somehow felt she could handle the truth of who I was. My reply was cut off, however, when I my ears were assaulted by the most shrill and horrible piercing sound I have ever heard. In but a moment, the stern countenance on Priscilla�s face had vanished and I saw both fear and defiance take its place. Her green eyes flashed a momentary look of flight and then just as quickly the alarm disappeared as her eyes became hard as ice. She reached out and pulled my arm, dragging me farther under the bridge and into the deepening shadows. I was about to say something when she shook her head at me, motioning me to silence, and stared up with wide eyes.