I sat by the deadened fire all night, wondering and thinking in my own bewildered mind, trying to work out what I was to do and how I was to do it. Now knowing that I was to search for a family that might not be living or even worse, find what they themselves had sought, some terrible evil, I had much to decide. By morning, as the sun was just drifting up over the tops of the dense green forest, I had made up my mind. I was determined and set and for once in my life, quite sure that I knew perfectly what was to be done.
I had just glanced over at the silent form of Priscilla, who had slept calmly throughout the night, when Sirviriel entered the glade where the bonfire and singing had taken place the night before. She carried two baskets of food, and in the midst of my contemplations, my keen Hobbit stomach growled. I blushed, but Sirviriel only smiled.
"You are hungry and rightly so. Here, eat." She handed me a delectable looking pear, and as I bit into it, I felt cool, sweet juice filling my eager mouth. "These two baskets are for you both to enjoy with our blessings."
"Thank you," I muttered, my mouth stuffed with fruit. I noticed that Sirviriel was looking sadly at Priscilla.
She sighed, "How sad you must leave us! We have enjoyed your company and as for me, I have made such a friend of your dear Priscilla that I will not have the least sorrow as we say farewells."
I only nodded. I didn't want to leave either. The safety I felt in these trees was remarkable and solid. Here I knew that there were Elves with power to protect and make right. To leave them felt like stepping in front of a troll with no weapons. May the Hobbit be helped who takes such foolish actions!
Sirviriel left then and I was alone again, looking at the fair form of Priscilla as she breathed heavily in sleep. She sounded so content. Yes, I wanted her to stay content. She might want to see more of Middle-earth, but she could not see it with me. I was decided. She would stay here with the Dolenwaith and they could be the ones to show her what she sought. Sirviriel would be pleased, knowing that Priscilla was staying behind. I began to consider how Sirviriel might be able to help me persuade Priscilla and was about to go in search of her, when Priscilla stirred and abruptly sat up. She turned to look at me with eyes glazed over and then began to giggle childishly.
"What a silly dream! And I'm still here in the clearing." She gazed around carefully. "For a moment, I was sure I was in some dark hole in the earth with you Pady and we were terribly frightened. But it was a dream." She smiled up at me, but my heart sank. How peculiar it was that she would dream of danger at this hour!
"Are these for us?" Priscilla began to delve into the food baskets enthusiastically when I nodded, choosing a selection of breads and fruits for herself. As she began to eat, I myself looked inside one of the baskets and found a nice lump of cheese. For long moments I heard nothing but the chewing and gnawing of too starved Hobbits. Finally, after I had eaten enough to satiate my hunger at the time, I closed my eyes and gathered myself for the task that lay before me.
Priscilla had begun to speak while she ate and I listened silently to what she was saying. It is a good thing I am a Hobbit, for I am sure no one else would have understood her. However, Hobbits are naturals at hearing others through the chewing of food and so I sat there content to hear what she had to say. She chattered on for several minutes, describing her excitement about the night before and how wonderful it was to find ourselves amongst such lovely Elves. She mentioned a good deal about Sirviriel, and I think somewhere within her speech was the story of Sirviriel's marriage to Celuvellon. However, my mind began to drift away as I listened and with my eyes closed, I could not help but feel a dark foreboding surrounding me. Suddenly and abruptly, Priscilla's voice came to a halt and opening my eyes I saw she was staring at me intently.
"Haven't you slept at all this night?" She asked, holding a half-eaten apple in her hand.
I shook my head. "I have had too much to think about."
Priscilla's face creased in worry. "What is it, Pady?" She asked this last hesitantly, and I knew she sensed that something was horribly amiss. She had set down her apple and I knew that she must have been ready to hear me solemnly when she decided to forgo food.
"I haven't told you why I'm out here, Priscilla."
"To find your family."
I sighed. "Yes, I've told you that... but... how much do you know about my past?" I was afraid to hear the answer, but it would be better for me if she knew more than she had let on in the past three days.
Priscilla shrugged. "I've only heard the usual rumors that there is something strange about you and something dark, but no one really knows what it is. I never paid much attention. What silly gossips!"
My heart lightened slightly at the realization that Priscilla had never taken joy in sitting around and talking about me behind my back. I wanted to smile and thank her, but my task at hand was too heavy and urgent.
"Well... it's true. My past is dark. Very dark. Priscilla, my family, that is, my part of the Proudfoot family, they fought their own kin and destroyed good, green land of the Shire, burning it to the ground."
Priscilla's eyes were large and wide as I spoke. Her voice came out as a whisper. "Why?" Hobbits had never dared to harm one another before and I knew she wanted an answer, a reason, I couldn't give.
"I don't know. They just did. Something out there, something dangerous, got a hold of them and made them do it. At least, that's what Lady Sirithiel told me she thought last night. My family was healed by the Dolenwaith and they are still out there somewhere and they need my help. The journey I'm on is to find them and help them in any way I can."
Priscilla was still sitting quite still, her eyes focused on me attentively. Her voice was low when she spoke, as if she did not want anyone to overhear our conversation. "Well, that makes sense. I am sure that when we find them we can help them, no matter what they have done. Really, Pady, you don't have to be ashamed. I mean, yes, I can see how dark your family history may be, but if they have been healed by the Dolenwaith, who knows what we will find? You might be surprised. I doubt they are corrupt anymore."
As pleased as I was for her graciousness in accepting me and my family despite how awful they sounded and as comforted as I was by her words of encouragement to me, I could not let her go on for long. It was time to tell her.