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About eight years ago a fellow gamer by the name of Jon-Paul Colegrove shoved a copy of Jordan's The Eye of the World into my hands. This occurred because I had told him that I'd given up on reading fantasy. I'd read and loved Tolkien when I was ten and after doing so had dove head first into any fantasy title I could get my hands on. After doing this for about eight years I finally came to a realization: I was reading the same damn story over and over again. Every fantasy story I've read, with very few exceptions, follows what I call Tolkien's formula:Blood and Bloody Ashes (2d6)
1. The hobbit is taken from his simple life and forced into a grand adventure by the wizard. Please note, the hobbit can be replaced with "simple farm boy", "village commoner" or whatever. There can also be more than one "hobbit".
2. The hobbit discovers and/or quests for a wondrous device (ring, sword, shield, golden rubber ducky, whatever). This device can either save the world, and/or destroy it.
3. The hobbit discovers that he is the only one who can defeat the great evil.
4. The hobbit meet lots of interesting people on the way and gathers companions.
5. The hobbit has lots of interesting adventures.
6. The hobbit comes face to face with the great evil and triumphs over great adversity.
Jon-Paul assured me that this wasn't true of Jordan. He gave the man his highest praises and swore that his literature belonged beside Faulkner and Wordsworth. I took him for his word and gave Jordan a shot. If I ever see Jon-Paul again, he'd better run like hell.
Despite his assurances, the story followed Tolkien's Formula:
1. The hobbit (in this case Rand, Mat, Perrin, Egwene and Nynaeve (shudder-more on her later)- are taken from their simple village life by the wizard (Moriane) and led into what promises to be a grand adventure.
2. The hobbit discovers a wondrous device (in this case the fact that Rand is the Dragon Reborn-although in all fairness Jordan doesn't come out and say so in the first book. It's only hinted at) that can either save the world and/or destroy it (in this case both).
3. The hobbit (Rand) discovers that he is the only one who can defeat the great evil (the Dark One - 0 points for originality on naming that bad guy).
4. The hobbit meet lots of interesting people on the way and gathers companions (yup).
5. The hobbit has lots of interesting adventures (yup, for nine Goddamn books now).
6. The hobbit comes face to face with the great evil and triumphs over great adversity (I don't know yet, maybe we'll know by book 47).
You can probably tell that I'm a bit bitter about this series. Frankly, I feel ripped off. Despite the fact that the first book followed Tolkien's formula, I found it engaging enough to read the next book. Jordan does have a way with pulling the reader in. He gives just enough to get you interested and leaves enough out to keep you hooked. Book 2 was better, Book 3 was just as good, Book 4 wasn't bad, then I got to Book 5. Christ! What a snooze fest that hefty paper weight was. The Tanchico chapters went on forever. There wasn't one saving quality to the book. What really pissed me off was by this point I'd invested the time to read about 4000 pages, and I didn't feel like the story had gone anywhere for the past 1200.
Jordan fans are divided into two camps: those who say, "Be patient, he's building to something fantastic" and those who say, "Please God! Let this be the last book!" As you can guess, I'm solidly in the second group. So why do I keep reading? If I didn't finish the series now, I'd feel like I'd wasted my time on the past 6000 pages. I've invested so much time, this sucker better have an ending that makes my socks roll up and down. Besides, there are characters who I care about. Namely, Mat and Rand. I used to like Perrin, but it seems all he does lately is sniff a bunch of stuff.
I have to mention the one thing I like. RJ has developed one hell of a world, and a cast that spans pages. As an avid gamer, this is what I appreciate about the man. He does details well. The political maneuvering is engaging. The ethnic diversity is interesting. However, I have one major gripe. Why in the hell do these people worship the Light? RJ has spent so much time developing his world, but he's over looked religion. He just rubber stamped the topic with this whole "Light" business. Are we to assume that in the far flung future of his world all electricians will be holy men? I can hear the chants in the churches now, "Oh great GE, You bring great things to life".
The biggest bug up my butt with RJ is the women folk. I hate just about every female character in the whole stinking series. Jordan tries to give women a larger role in his epic. The problem is, if women truly acted the way Jordan portrays them, the human species would have suffered extinction long ago. Every time Nynaeve "tugs her braid" or Faile gives Perrin the silent treatment and "smells of hurt", I visibly cringe in my reading chair. If by some chance you're reading this RJ, for God sakes please kill Nynaeve and Faile! It the best reward you could give to your dedicated readers.
One final gripe. RJ loves the word "gilded". Everything in his books is gilded. I once counted how many times he used it on one page. Six, at and average of 620 pages per book that's 3700 times per volume. Get a new word RJ!
I've been suckered, like many other
people. I haven't yet suffered through
Winter's Heart, but I survived
A
Crown of Swords, and The Path of Daggers. When volume 9 hits
paper back, I'll pick up a copy and pray that volume 10 is the "Epic Conclusion
To the Wheel of Time Series". But at the pace RJ's held since book 5, I
predict not likely.
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