Mickey’s Story

Part1

By Codename Emi

~

Author’s note:  So here it is, the completed version of this story.  Even though the events are complete, it is far from being in its final version, so there are some errors.  While you are reading, you will come across some things that look like this (Composer).  This means that to make my story complete, I need to do a bit of research.  I haven't done this yet, so when you come across these, just ignore them and insert your own idea there. Lol.  Also, I realize that they go from just meeting to making out.  I KNOW THIS! Lol. Soon I am planning on going back and adding a "get to know you" period so that it all makes more sense.  Until then, read on my friends!

Oh yeah, feel free to IM me at grassizgreen4 (aim), [email protected] (msn and email), or 272686627 (icq).  Okay, me stop blabbing!  Enjoy!

 

This story has been rated PG-13 for language and sexual content.

 

            I had been rejected by them for the last time! I was not, could not, be treated like this!  I mean, it wasn't my fault I didn't own thousands of outfits or three tons of make-up.  It wasn't right for them to be so cruel just because they were rich and skinny and could do a couple of flips.  Allyssa Michelles was much more important to the world than any one of them!  Or at least I was going to be as soon as I stopped standing in the middle of the lunchroom looking like a total idiot.  I hurriedly looked around for another seat that was not occupied by a cheerleader.  Finally I spotted a table with only one person at it.  I walked over and asked the guy sitting there if it was alright to sit down.  He grunted in reply and went back to shoveling food into his mouth at an extremely high rate.  I had seen him around the halls some, but I had never actually talked to him.  He was a loner, one they called "The Mouse".  I didn't know his real name.  I studied him as he inhaled food.  He was very, very skinny, had a messy mop of blonde hair that kept falling into his dark, deep-set eyes.  He looked at me as he paused to take a swig of coke.  I noticed a few bruises near his jaw and around his right eye.  He glared at me and I held his gaze.  Smiling, I gave him my extra cookie.  He hesitated for a moment before snatching it from me and gobbling it down. 

            "Thanks," he said as he slowly stood up to go.

            "Hey," I said, "can I sit with you tomorrow?"

            He nodded and said, "Bring more cookies."

 

~

 

            Later, after school, my dad was late picking me up, as usual.  I sat, curled up under the tree, waiting.  As I ran my fingers through my long curly brown hair, I saw the kid from lunch burst through the gym doors.  By the time he neared my tree, he had slowed to a walk and I realized that tears were running down his bruised cheeks.  I stood when he walked by and he jumped.

            "Hey!" I said.

            He stopped.

            "What's wrong?" I asked.

            "Nothin'," he growled, swiping his hand across his nose.  He resumed walking.  When I started to follow him, he said, "Hey, want to walk with me a while?"

            I nodded and he slowed down a bit.  We walked in silence until we reached a wooden gate that led to an alley between the rows of houses.  It was padlocked.

            "Well, I'm heading home now, see ya," he said.

            "You live back there?" I asked.

            He replied, "Sort of."  I gawked as he scrambled over the fence and disappeared.  Finally, I turned to run back to school, wondering about this strange boy.

 

~

 

He was there even before I got to the lunchroom, sitting at the table alone, wolfing down food.  I sat across from him and pulled out my lunch.  I smiled as I pulled out the extra sandwich and cookies. 

He scowled when I pushed them towards him.  He continued to eat, and I talked to him. 

"Hey, yesterday, I didn't catch your name."

He paused for a moment, looked me in the eye, and then stared at his plate.

"Don't laugh," he said.  "It's Mickey.  Mickey Mouser.  But it's not mouse, its like Bowser, but with an M instead of a B."

I nodded for a moment.  "So do you live on Burken Street?"

"Near there, yeah."

Burken Street was where all the rich people lived, and it was at the end of the alley he had gone through.  He certainly did not look like he lived in a mansion with 50 acres of land.  I just nodded again.

"So what do you like to do?" I asked.

"Play the violin, write music, dream."

"You play the violin?  Wow!"

He grinned.

"I want to learn, but my parents won't let me.  Money problems," I told him truthfully.

He nodded and silently massaged one of his bruises.  I noticed two new ones had come up on his arm along with a dozen of cuts.

"Where do you get those horrible things?" I asked.

He glared at me.

I pushed him another cookie.  He snatched it away and mumbled, "This guy I live with.  Says he's my uncle, but he ain't."

"Why don't you tell the police?"

"I'm illegal."

My jaw dropped.

"Hey, come with me after school, I'll show you where I live, then you'll see," he offered.

I nodded dumbly.

"See ya," he said and stood up, slipping a cookie and the other half of the sandwich into his pocket.  Then he turned back around and looked at me for a moment, waved, and said, "Bye 'Lissa."

I was completely awestruck.  I hadn't told him my name, had I? And why 'Lissa?  No one had called me that before.

I was still pondering this when the bell range and I ran off to class.

 

~

 

All I could think about was what I was going to see on the other side of the fence.  I was nervous with anticipation.  I wanted to go, but he could be dangerous.  But not if he lived in one of those big houses with columns and 54 TVs.  But why was he beat up and starved?  Maybe his parents liked to go on vacations and leave him with his so-called uncle who beat him up and refused to feed him.  And why did he say he was illegal?  Was he a murderer?  It just didn't make any sense. 

I daydreamed all through my last classes.  Finally the bell rang and so I went out and stood under the tree.  I waited.  No Mickey.  Maybe he had forgotten.  No!  He couldn't have.

I sat and waited.  And waited.  I stood up and paced back and forth. 

I did this for a while before I turned around and—boom!  There he was, right behind me!  I almost screamed, but he put a hand on my shoulder.  I went stalk still.  His hand was warm and he was so close to me.  He looked at me with those dark, deep-set eyes that could pierce anyone straight to the heart.

He finally broke the silence by saying, "Hey, ready to go?" and withdrawing his hand.

"W-where-" I stammered, trying to ask him where he had come from.

"You gotta be stealthy, where I come from," he answered quickly.  He started walking and I followed him.

"Later," I asked, "want to walk down to the drive in and get a coke?”

“Yeah, but you’ll have to pay.  I’m broke,” he said.

I replied, “Okay.”

We walked to the gate.  He turned around and grasped both my hands tightly in his.  I drew in a quick breath and stared into his eyes.

“’Lissa, you’ve got to promise me that you won’t tell anyone about this.  I could be sent to jail or worse—sent away from you.”

My heart fluttered.  “Not a soul, cross my heart.”

He smiled and said, “I knew I could trust you.”

He jumped toward the fence.  Watching him scramble over, I wondered how I was going to get across.

He reappeared again and dropped a stool down to me.  With its aid, I somehow made it over the fence.  Once I was firmly on my feet again, I looked around.  I was surprised by the piles of junk lying there.

“Don’t touch anything!” Mickey hissed.  “It all belongs to Old Man Hell-raiser, and if he catches you even eyeing his stuff—uh-oh!”  He grabbed my wrist and set off at a run as a scary looking man with a big rusty rifle emerged from one of the piles of junk.

I ran for my life.  Finally, we stopped and I stood, gasping for breath beside slim Mickey at the edge of an unkempt field.

He whistled shrilly for a moment and a horse came galloping towards us.  Once the horse came to a stop beside us, Mickey smiled and I reached a hand toward the beautiful black beast.  It nuzzled my hand as I rubbed its nose.

“He’s not really mine,” Mickey said as he climbed up onto the animal’s back, “but he comes when I call him, so I ride him.”  He reached a hand down to me and hauled me up.

He started the horse forward and I held on, prepared for the ride of my life.

It was amazing—the wind blowing through my hair, my arms holding tightly to Mickey, and the sound of the tall grass beneath the stallion’s feet.  It ended all too soon as we had reached the end of the field.  We slipped down and I weaved my fingers through his.  He then led me around some pine trees to reveal something I had only seen in the movies.

It was a cardboard shanty town!

I stared.  It was buzzing with people, all sorts; old people, young people, middle-aged people.  I clung to Mickey’s hand as he led me toward them.

As we approached, the people became frantic, rushing around and yelling, “Outsider!  Outsider!”  By the time the two of us reached the town itself, everyone had disappeared.  We stood for a moment in the center of a circle of makeshift houses.

Nothing stirred.  I wondered what Mickey was thinking while I continued to hold his hand tightly.

Finally, a small boy crept out from behind a tree and walked toward us.  “Mickey,” the boy said, “who’s the girl?”

“Her name is Allyssa Michelles.  She’s cool, she’ll keep her mouth shut real good,” Mickey answered.

They both looked at me and I nodded vigorously.

The boy, addressing the air, said, “I think she’s good.”

Slowly, the town came alive again, and the people crowded around me, all giving me strange looks.

Mickey pulled me away, whispering, “Let me show you my crash.”  I blindly followed him, aware of all the stares.  Eventually, people went back to their own business, except for three boys.

When Mickey led me up to a small area with walls created by hanging sheets, we all sat down on milk crates.  Mickey introduced me to the three.

They were all very thin like Mickey, and had brown hair.  Two of them had brown eyes and they stood close to one another.  The other was the one who had spoken out for me.  He had startling blue eyes, and he wore a reckless look about him.  The two brown eyed boys were called Matthew and Mark.  The other was named Jack.

“They’re the Bowsers,” Mickey was saying, “They’re left in my charge until their brother Eric comes home from college.”  The five of us sat and talked for a while, and I leaned how the shanty town had come to be, hidden behind the trees and fields of Burken Street.  I also learned how the Bowsers had come to reside there.  The boys’ mother had died when they were quite young and their father had sent them away to separate boarding schools, but they had somehow managed to get together again.

“It’s better here than at that crummy school!” said the one called Mark.  “We’re hungry, but together!”

Jack replied, “Except for Eric.”

Mark nodded.

“What about you, Mickey?” I asked innocently.  “How’d you end up here?”

“You didn’t tell her?” Jack hissed.

“I’m gonna,” Mickey replied reassuringly, smiling slyly at me.  “Can I take up your offer for drinks now, ‘Lissa?”  We rose to go.  “Don’t worry,” he said, “we’ll go the short way.”

Matthew and Mark headed back toward the main village, but Jack hung back a little, you could tell he wasn’t like his brothers.  “Mickey,” he warned, “stay out of trouble, okay?”

“Okay kid, go on.  I’ll be alright,” Mickey replied and messed up his hair.  Jack turned and ran to catch up with his brothers.

Mickey pulled the sheets that hung off the trees around so that it formed a small enclosed room and then he smiled at me.  I smiled back.

“You should know, ‘Lissa, now that I’ve shown you.  You should know about me.”

I nodded; “Alright.”  I was so confused already.

I heard a loud noise and turned to see and old brown pick-up truck roll into the shanty town.  Mickey grabbed my hand and we dashed into the trees. 

We ran again.  I was so tired of running, I finally called out, “Mickey!  Stop!  Please?”  He turned and looked at me.

I'm sure I was a mess. I was sweating like crazy and my hair was falling down.

“Oh my gosh!” he cried.  “I’m so sorry I got you into this!”  He sunk down onto the soft bed of pine needles.  I sat beside him.

“That was my so called uncle back there.  You see-well…  I’m kind of a child born from rape.  My mother was only 14 when she had me, and she died not soon after that.  That man is her father’s friend.  He was supposed to kill me, but his wife brought me here.  I was raised by lots of women here—all very nice, of course—but whenever I make a move, he hurts me.  Says I can’t take care of myself.  But I can, ‘Lissa, you know?  Myself and the Bowsers!  I swear I ain’t ever been to jail or been on drugs or anything but still… if anyone found out about me being here—or any of us for that matter—we’d all be in trouble.”  He looked at me with his deep-set eyes.

“Mickey…” I whispered, entranced.

“Do you still want to be my friend, ‘Lissa?” he asked, his voice low and soft.

I reached out and clutched his hand in mine.  “Yeah, I do.”

He smiled and suddenly I realized how close I was to him.  Our knees were touching, and I was holding his hand in my lap. 

I looked at him, just in time to see his eyes flit up and down my body.  I wanted to run, but my heart was singing.  He leaned closer to me and I shivered when I felt his breath on my lips.  His hands rested on my sides, the one slightly under my t-shirt.  I felt his lips against mine, slightly open, his tongue pressing lightly on my bottom lip.  Somehow, when I pulled way, he was lying slightly on top of me.  His brown eyes stared into mine and it seemed as though he was seeing inside me. 

I squirmed a bit, and we rearranged ourselves so that I was lying next to him with my leg wrapped around his.  My head rested on his shoulder.  It felt right to be there with him in that moment, so right and peaceful, even with that slight urge to run.  I listened to his breathing—almost even, with a catch on the intake.  After a while, I closed my eyes and felt myself drift into sleep.

~

 

My eyes fluttered open to see Mickey's face above me.  It was very dark. Mickey was leaning against a tree, holding my head in his lap.

"You have beautiful hair, 'Lissa," he whispered, stroking it.

I smiled, placing my hand on top of his, following its trail.  No one had ever thought that I had beautiful hair before—not the girls at school, not the lady that cut my hair, not even my own mother.  Although she couldn't have believed that I even talked to boys, let alone stayed out with homeless one named Mickey Mouser in the woods until it was dark.

That thought dawned on me.  It was dark!  What would my mother think?

"Mickey, what time is it?" I asked, stretching and trying to stand.

"Near 8:30, I guess.  We both slept for a long time," he answered.

"No!" I cried.  "Mickey, I'm going to be in so much trouble!"  I was on my feet now.

"Hey wait!" Mickey said, "Let me show you out of here."

"Alright, alright," I answered, nervous tat the thought of my angry mother.  "I don't know the way out anyway."

We walked quickly and very close together, holding hands.

At first I couldn't tell if Mickey was talking to me or if he was just muttering to himself. 

"What?" I finally asked.

"I was just sayin' that I've never met anyone like you before.  At least—I mean… I've never known anyone to kiss like you do.  I've had girlfriends before—mostly for money, I know…"  We had reached the end of the forest.  I could hear the traffic from the road.

I stopped and threw my arms around his neck, pressing myself against his thin yet strong body.

"Bye 'Lissa," he whispered.

"Bye," I said and kissed his cheek before turning and running down the street.

 

~

 

I burst into the house.  "Allyssa!  Is that you?" my mom shouted.

"Yeah, it's me," I answered.

"Where have you been?  I came home early today and you weren't here!"

"I stayed after school to help with the dance.  Didn't you get my message?"  I told her.  I didn't like to lie, but I always did.

"I see," Mom said, nodding.  "Are you going to be working tomorrow too?"

Tomorrow was Friday.  I could spend the whole day with Mickey… If he wanted me to. 

"Yes, we're going to be working until at least midnight, getting ready for the dance on Saturday.  Okay?" I said.  My mom wasn't really stupid; in fact, she worked as a nurse at the hospital downtown.

She nodded and answered, "I have to do noon to midnight tomorrow, so that will be alright."

I nodded myself and headed off to my room, my head spinning.

On my way through the living room, my dad yelled from the couch, "Allyssa!  Will you bring me something to drink?"

He said something, but I knew he wanted beer.  My dad didn't do anything but sit in his old grungy recliner all day watching football.  Sometimes I wished he would get a real job, but he wouldn't be able to handle it.  "Sure Dad," I said, and headed to the fridge.  After I gave the can of beer to him, he scowled at me and I hurried to my room.

I jumped into my pajamas and buried myself under the covers, my mind filled with thoughts of Mickey.  Eventually I fell asleep.

 

~

 

All too soon it was morning again, and my alarm clock was yelling at me.  I turned it off, pulling myself out of bed and into the bathroom.  I stood for a moment in front of the mirror, wondering why I was so tired.  I had more of those dreams during the night.  The kind of nightmare that should be scary, but is just very emotional.  Where I think, “It’s just a dream,” and try to make myself wake up.  They always come in threes.  I grinned at myself when I suddenly remembered Mickey.  How could I have forgotten?  I laughed and then yawned and finished getting ready for school.

I put on my light purple sweater and the ash colored jeans that made me look thin.  Since it was Friday, I had to walk to school.  I picked up my books and slipped out the back door.  Not too soon after I had started out, I began to hear like someone was following me.

I looked back, and there was no one there.  Again I started walking, and again I heard the noise.  I whirled around.  Nobody.  I slowly turned back around. 

“Ahhh!” I screamed and jumped.

“Hey you,” Mickey said.

“Don’t do that to me!” I answered.

“What?  Aren’t you glad to see me?”

I grinned; “Of course I am!  You just scared me.”

“Sorry,” he said, his voice just above a whisper as he looked at me with his deep brown eyes.  “I won’t do it again.”

I couldn’t help but smile.

After a moment, we started walking, shoulder to shoulder down the sidewalk.  I’d never walked to school with a boy before.  I glanced at him.  He looked nicer than I’d ever seen him.  He was wearing clean jeans, held onto his thin waist by a blue belt, and a tight brown t-shirt that showed every bone and muscle on him.

“Hey,” he said when we came in sight of the school, “if anyone asks you if we’re going out—what will you say?”

“I’ll say, yes, he’s the greatest guy I’ve ever met.  Greatest kisser too.”

He smiled brightly and I smiled right back.  We headed into the building and he followed me to my locker.

“Can I walk you to your first class, ‘Lissa?” he asked.

“Okay,” I answered.

When we were almost to the door, he said quickly, “You sure look nice today.”

“You too,” I answered, surprised.  “I like the jeans,” I added.

He grinned.  “They’re new.”

I smiled back, waved, and headed into my algebra class.

 

~

 

 

I didn’t see Mickey again until after my debate class.  I was on my way to History, the last class before lunch, when he called out to me.

“How were your first four classes today?” I asked him.  I didn’t even hear what his answer was, for the moment I looked into his eyes, I became lost in the simple admiration that shown brightly in them.  After a moment, I realized he was waiting for a response from me. 

“What?” I asked.  “Sorry…”

“Are you going to History next?”

“Oh,” I answered, nodding.  “Yep, you gonna take me there too?”

“Sure,” he replied, and we headed off.  “Here,” he said, “lemme carry your books.”

I smiled and let him.

“You wanna hang out with me later?  I’ve got lots of things to show you,” he asked me.

“Yes, definitely!  I told my mom I’d be helping out with some dance until after midnight.  Plus, she’s working until then.  So we’ve got all the time in the world,” I answered.

"Oooh, bad girl, lying to her mother," he teased. 

As we reached my History class, he threw me an adorable grin and gave me a quick kiss on the lips.  My heart fluttered.

            "Later 'Lissa," he told me and disappeared in the crowd.

            "Hey Allyssa!" a girl called as I drifted into my class.  I looked up.  It was a tall, popular girl named Ana. 

I used to be friends with this gossipy girl, but now I wanted nothing to do with her.  Mickey put me in heaven, and I didn't need  her busting my bubble!  I scowled and went over to her.

"Are you and the Mouse really going out?" she asked, although her tone was anything but pleasant.  "I heard he lives in the sewers!"  Her group of girls cackled with laughter.

"Yes, we are going out!  He's a wonderful guy!  And he doesn't live in the sewers, he lives on Burken Street!  But you didn't bother to find that out, did you?  Only judged him by his appearance, did you?" I shouted at her.  I was angry. 

Just then, the teacher walked in, and seeing me ready for a fight, said, "Allysa, is there a problem here?"

"No, there's no problem," I growled, giving Ana one last horrible glare and moving to my seat.  "Only one more class to go, just one more," I told myself, "just make it through this one and then the next, then you have the whole day to spend alone with Mickey. Sweet, sweet Mickey."

Without knowing it, I brushed my fingers across my lips.  I loved the way the simple caress of his lips against mine could make my heart race.

Look at me, Allyssa Michelles, being a romantic.  I smiled at the thought.

"Allyssa! Psst!"  Someone behind me was trying to get my attention.  I turned my head.  A girl handed me a note and I turned back around to open it.

It held a hideous drawing of two mice humping one another.  The words "Mickey & Minnie 4-ever" were written at the top.

I turned and glared at Ana and the people with her.  They laughed.

"Mr. Hall!"  I raised my hand.

"Yes Allyssa?" he answered, stopping his lecture.

"I don't feel so good.  Can I go to the nurse?"

"Fine, go ahead."

I stood and fled my history class, leaving behind the cruel people who hated Mickey and I for no reason at all…  No reason at all.

I went outside and climbed up into a low Something tree.  I rested my cheek against the cool wood, and instantly I was asleep.

 

~

 

I was dreaming I was in Mickey's arms, soaring above the deep blue sea, loving him so much.  Then suddenly, I was falling.  I splashed into the water, but instead of sinking, I hit something hard.

I opened my eyes and looked into a tall stranger's black eyes.

"Hola chica," he said, his voice rough and heavy with a Spanish accent.  He reached a hand down to me.  "Didn't hurt yourself too bad did you?  Better get up, class is almost over."

I blinked, took his hand, and feebly stood.  "Oh my head!"  it pounded horribly.

"Ven conmigo, chica bonita, ven conmigo."  He headed back toward the school and I followed behind him.  The bell rang just as we reached the door.

"Tyler!  'Lissa!" I heard Mickey's voice call out.

"Mickey!" I cried weakly.  I felt sore.

He reached us and wrapped his arms around me.  "Thanks for finding her Ty."

"De nada, amigo, hasta luego."  Tyler, my rescuer, dashed away.

Mickey bent to kiss me once before asking, "Want to skip last period?"  He dug in his pocket.  "I've got signed transfers."

I pondered the idea of skipping my science class.  "Sure, I'd love to do that, baby boy," I replied, trying out the name on him.  He beamed, weaving his fingers into mine. 

"What about you, don't you have class?" I asked as we headed towards my next class.

"I have PE but I never go, so it doesn't matter."

I smiled and left him waiting in the hall while I went to give the transfer to Mr. Ghram.  He let me go without much question, only giving me a funny look and a worksheet to do.  I smiled at him, hiding my lies, and told him to have a nice day.

"Great job," Mickey said to me, draping an arm over my shoulders.

"Let's just go, Mickey," I told him, moving towards to door.

"Gee, 'Lissa, calm down, we're okay!"

I looked at him and laughed easily.  He met my eyes and smiled.

'You know something, 'Lissa?  I love you."

There, on the sidewalk, I became speechless.  I turned and fell into his arms, showering him with kisses.

"Sweet girl," he crooned, "sweet, sweet girl.  Come, let's go."

I blushed at my actions, and clung to his hand as we came to the gate.  This time he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small key, which with he promptly unlocked the gate.  We entered and then walked leisurely to the field, since the scary old man didn't show up.

I loved walking with Mickey.  I loved listening to him breathe and feeling him next to me.  I couldn't believe how much my life had changed in so short a time.

Mickey whistled and the great horse came to him once again.

"Do you mind just riding around. 'Lissa?  I don't feel like going home yet," he asked.

I leaned against him; "Sure, I don't care."  I wanted to tell him about the girls teasing me.  I wanted to know what he thought and how he managed to put up with it every single day.

We rode up a hill, and Mickey pulled the beast to a halt.

"Look," he said, pointing out toward the horizon.  You could see the school down below and basically the whole town.

"Wow."  I smiled.  I slid down off the horse, landing on the soft grass.  Mickey came down behind me, placing his hands on my waist.  I tipped my head and looked at him.  "Mickey, your life is so interesting, I love you very, very much."  I kissed his chin.  "Come and sit with me, I want to talk with you."

So we sat down on the ground.  I leaned back against his chest.  He held me and I said, "Today in history, that one girl, Ana, and all her friends started putting you down.  I just couldn't take it, I had to leave."

"Preps," he replied, stroking my arms, "I just don't get them.  But I do understand why you needed to get away, that's why I sent Ty after you.  I would have gone myself, but the teacher hates me.  Only because I'm dumb.  Maybe 'cause I look grungy… but I don't know.  I hate it."

We were silent for a while, just enjoying each other's company.

"I could stay like this forever, Mickey," I told him.

He straightened a bit and pulled up the sleeves of his jacket.  "Look, 'Lissa.  This is what I did."

I gasped as I saw the hideous pink scars lining his wrists.  "Why?"  I could have cried, but instead  I only stroked the scars lightly.

"I needed a way out… I needed to feel as if I were in control of something.  A reason for them to hate me.  Do you see?"

I pressed myself against him.

"I'm pretty sure I won't need that release anymore."  He kissed me with passion behind it.  "You make me feel so good about myself."

I returned his kiss.  "I could definitely say the same of you."

We were still for a while more and then he stood, stretching.

"Want to come with me to my favorite place ever?" he said, reaching a hand down to me.

"Oh definitely!"  I stood and he called the horse.

Off we rode until we reached a street, then we slid down and walked hand in hand down the sidewalk.

"Where're we going, Mickey?"

"Here we are."  We stopped in front of a store whose sign read "Brannon's Strings Etc."

"Come on!" Mickey said, pulling me into the shop.  The bell chimed as the door closed behind us.

"Wow," I said once my eyes adjusted to the dim light.

The walls were covered with string instruments of all kinds.

"Hey Mickey!" a man with bushy blonde hair appeared from behind the counter.  Ha ha. A surfer.  "In so early today?"  Then he noticed me.  "Who's the pretty lady, man?"

"This is my girlfriend, Allyssa."

The man stepped forward and extended his hand; "Brannon Roland of 'Brannon's Strings Etc.'  All the strings you could ever want or need.  What can I do for you?"

I smiled and shook his hand, while Mickey said, "Actually, I wanted to try out that new VIOLIN that you said would be in today."

"Oh yes!  Just one moment please."  Brannon disappeared behind a curtain and then reappeared with a shiny new violin.  "There you go, man!  Try it out."

Mickey took up the bow and began to play a slow tune.  I sat down in a chair and watched him pour his heart and soul into the music.  I was entranced.  He ended with a fast jig, opening his eyes and beaming at me.

A burst of applause came from a group of people that had gathered towards the entrance to the shop and Mickey blushed.. 

I hugged him the moment he set the instrument down.  "That was beautiful!"

"Just like you," he crooned.

I laughed and asked him to play some more.  He did and one of the older men who had come in put a dollar bill in the open violin case.  I thanked him.

He said, "Of course, little lady, I love music, and that's some of the best playing I've heard in a long time."

Mickey played and I watched for a whole hour after that before he finally declared himself "all played out." By this time, many people had come and gone in the small shop and had left money in the case.  We counted it up all the change and Mickey beamed with happiness.

"Seventeen dollars!" he cried.  "That's enough to feed me for day or two!  Say, Brannon, do you mind if I come and do this more often?"

"Yeah man!  Come in whenever you want!  I've never had so many people in here at once!"

Mickey put the beautiful instrument away carefully and returned it to Brannon. 

"See you tomorrow then. Bye!" Mickey said, and we left, walking hand in hand once again.

"That was amazing!  Simply amazing!  I never ina million years would have dreamed I'd be listening to someone my age play like that!  Let alone someone I was actually dating!  I love you!  I love you!  I love you!"

He smiled his 50-watt smile.  "Love you too, 'Lissa.  Wanna come with me to pick up the Bowsers?"

"Sure."  And with that,  we headed off toward West Calwood Junior High.

 

~

 

We waited out by the street for the three boys to show up. 

"There,"  Mickey pointed.

I followed his gaze to see a large rowdy group of boys, pushing and shoving, making their way around the building. 

Two larger boys grabbed Matthew and Mark, pulling them away from the group.  It was definitely not a friendly motion.  The boys left in the circle turned on Jack.

"Mickey, I think he needs help," I told him, tugging on his sleeve.  "Mickey!"  He was winking at some young girls walking by.  I hit his arm.  "Hello!  You're my boyfriend!"

He looked at me sheepishly and grinned. "Whaaat?  They were checkin' me out!"

"Look!"  I turned his attention back to the boys, just in time to see a fat kid throw a punch right at Jack's face.

"So? They can take care of themselves,"  he frowned.

I was amazed at his response.  How could he be so deep and loving one moment and selfish and annoying the next?

"Well, if you're not going to help the poor boy, then I will."  I stormed across the school lawn and straight up to the fighters.

"'Lissa!" he called after me,  "Don't do that!"

"Boys!" I said loudly and confidently, even though I was prickling with fear.  They stopped hitting Jack and stared at me.  He took advantage of the moment and pulled away.

Just as he turned to run, the other boys figured I couldn't harm them.  They sprung into action to recapture Jack.

"Stop it, damn you!" Mickey yelled, jumping into their path.

The rowdy boys growled, sizing Mickey up.  Jack came up and stood next to him, looking tall.

One boy who seemed like the leader hissed "Fuck you!" and jumped on Mickey.  In a flash, my blonde-haired beauty had the stupid kid on the ground moaning.

The group was disgusted, but decided to leave just as Mickey said, "Go to hell you half-brained scum!"

I myself wondered how many times in his life he had had that same phrase yelled at him, but it had worked, the bullies were leaving.

And so were we.  Matthew and Mark by this time had been set free from their captors and hurried to join us.

We walked through a path between some houses and ended up beside a well-kept but deserted pond.

"Matty, Mark, lemme talk to you two."  The three walked further down by the water.

I looked over at Jack, who was left standing near me.  He scuffed at the grass.

"Jack?" I said.  He looked back at me.

"Yeah?" was his answer.

"Hi," I said.

"Hello."  He threw a glance over at Mickey.  "Wanna sit?" he asked.

We sat.

"I like you because you're different," I told him.

He sighed.  "I've always been strange.  Even different from my brothers.  We're triplets.  They're the indentical ones, you know?  And I'm just Jack."

Once again I nodded, very understanding.

"If it weren't for me, those two would be popular.  Ellos son tonto."  He grinned and hit his forehead with his palm to indicate that they were dumb.

I laughed.  "Where'd you learn that?  Some friend of Mickey's today talked in Spanish to me today.  Tyler.  Or something."

"Yeah, from him.  He comes around sometimes.  Good guy," he told me, and his grin shone in contrast to his dark hair.  "Can I do something, Allyssa?" this eighth grader asked me.

"Maybe…what?" I answered, wary.

"This," he said, his voice soft.  He slipped an arm around my shoulders.

I laughed and scooted closer to him.

"Jack!" Mickey hollered.  "Get your hands off my woman you disgusting man-whore!"

"I ain't nothin' of yours you filthy trailer trash!" I hollered back at him.

Mickey jogged up the hill.  He came to a stop in front of me and gave me his hand to pull me up off the ground.

"Don't you want to be mine?" he said, looking worried, but still grinning.

"And who else's would I be?" I answered, letting him haul me from the grass.

"Oh, I'm just afraid Jack here might steal you away," he told me.

I smiled shyly at the younger boy and gave him my own hand to help him up.  Then I did something unthinkable.  I leaned over and kissed the younger boy right on the lips.

He blushed and Mickey's eyes went wide.  "W-wha..?" he stammered.

In response, I threw my arms around my boyfriend and kissed him for a long time.  We came away breathless.

"Oh but I love you more," I managed.

He held me.  "You were just playing around, right girl?"

"Yeah, right," Jack said, answering for me.  "Sorry I can't hang around guys, I'm outta here."

"Later Jack my man," was Mickey's answer as he laid me down once again in the soft grass and proceeded to shower me with kisses.

 

~

 

I walked into the house.  It was very dark; no lights were on.  My mother was home, I'd seen her car in the driveway.

As I walked past my parent's bedroom, I heard giggling.

I stopped.  I listened.

I heard my father moan and my mother cry out.

I felt my face flush as the realization of what was happening hit me.

My parents were having sex.

My knees weakened and I somehow managed to make it up the stairs.  I closed the door and locked it before ly8ing back on my bed.

"Oh my!" I thought, "what a day this has been."

And then in reference to my parents, "I hope it's good."

Then realizing what I had just thought, said aloud, "Ew!  Ew!  EW!"

 

~

 

"Guess what!"  I said to Mickey as I sat down at the lunch table.  It was over two months since the day I met Brannon Roland, kissed Jack, and heard my parents doing "it".  Since that day, my relationship with Mickey had grown steadily.  There hadn't been too much more bad teasing about the tow of us, and it turned out that Mickey had all sorts of friends that would be around to help me out if things did go sour with any bullies.

"What?" Mickey said.

"My 17^th birthday's on Friday!" I told him, excited.

"Awesome!" he answered, and then after a while said, "'Lissa, what's your favorite place to eat?  I wanna take you out."

"Oh Mickey!" I said, giving him a grin that promised kisses later.

 

~

 

"Allyssa!  Dinner!" my mom called.

"Coming Mom!"  I answered, putting away my algebra book.

As I plopped myself down in my seat in front of a steaming bowl of tomato soup.

"Do you realize that you're going to be 17 on Friday?" my mother said. 

She was being friendly.  It scared me.

But she went on, "Have you thought about how you want to celebrate?  Maybe what you want?"

I knew the answer to this one!  "I have plans for dinner with a friend."

I waited for her reaction.

"Oh?  Who?"

"My friend Mickey, we're real close."

My mother actually smirked at me!  "Boyfriend?" she said.

I could feel myself blush.  "Yes."

"Have you had sex yet?  Do I need to get you birth control pills?  Condoms?  Anything?"

My mouth all but dropped open and my eyes open wide.  "Mom!  No!"

"Well," she said, "doesn't hurt to ask."

There was a silence as she ate.  My appetite had gone.

"What do you two do together then?"

"Well… we go different places.  He knows where all these interesting places are.  Ones you never knew existed.  Ponds, hills…  Sometimes we go to the music store.  He plays the violin like an angel!  A wonderful angel…  That's what I want Mom!"

"What, Allyssa?"

"I want to learn to play the violin.  I could join the orchestra at school, Mom!  That's really what I want."

"Well… I'll have to talk with your father."

That meant no.  Grand.  The one thing I've wanted more than anything was already nixed.

I sighed and took my bowl to the sink.

 

~

 

"Does he drive, Allyssa?" my mother asked me as she helped me fix up my hair.

"No," I told her.  "We're going to walk to Edie's."

"Edie's Burgers?" she asked, unbelieving.

"Yeah, Mom, I love that place!"

"Well I would have thought your boyfriend would want to take you someplace nice."

"It was my choice, Mom.  There isn't anywhere else I'd rather go."

"Fine, girl, let me have a look at you."  I stood and turned in a circle, modeling my black skirt, new white blouse, and now curled hair.  "You look wonderful.  I can't believe you're 17 now."

She hugged me tightly.

"Thanks Mom.  I'm gonna go look for Mickey now."

"Sweetie, I would like to meet him."

"Okay Mom."  It was okay with me, but I wasn't sure of what Mickey would say.  Oh well.

I went and opened the front door to look out. 

"Mickey!" I gasped.  He was standing in front of the door, looking nervous.  "You look amazing!" I told him.  He was wearing grey pants and a black suit jacket.  His hair was combed back.  It looked very soft.  I wanted to touch it.

"Come in Mickey, my mom wants to meet you."  I took his hand and walked with him down the hall.  "Mom, this is Mickey.  Mickey, my mom."

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Michelles."

"You too, Mickey."

I could tell he was nervous.

"Okay Mom, gotta go.  I'll be back before midnight.  Se you," I said, ushering Mickey out the door.

"Bye Mrs. Michelles!" Mickey said.

He and I walked silently together, bumping shoulders companionably. 

After a short while, he said, "She seems nice.  Your mom, I mean."

"Not really," was my answer.

"But at least you have one."

"Aw, Mickey."  I took his hand.

He smiled wistfully.

Together we entered the small restraunt.  Since it was still early, the place was empty.

"Come on in, you two!  Find a spot," a large busty woman hollered from the kitchen.

"Sure Edie!" I said back, going over to a table.

"Allyssa!  Happy Birthday!" the woman named Edie cried as she backed through the swinging doors.  "Ohhh!" she said when she was Mickey.  "Who's this fine fellow?"

"This is Mickey.  Mickey, this is my old baby-sitter, Edie. Also owner of this wonderful place."

"Pleasure," Edie said to him, pulling out her notepad.  "What can I get you?"

Mickey and I ordered our drinks and then looked at the menu.

"What'll you have, 'Lissa?" he asked me.

"Actually, I was planning on just having a salad."

"Why?  I've got enough money.  Why don't you order something better?"

"No, I'm really not hungry."

"Come on, 'Lissa, I have enough."

"I know, but that's what I want."  Why was he acting so strange and angry?

"'Lissa!"

"Mickey…"

I tried staring him down.. He only stared back.

I looked away as his eyes showed something more than defiance.  I was frightened at the sudden lust in his eyes.

Before either one of us could say anything, Edie appeared.  "Decided what you want?"

"Yeah," I started off, but was cut off by Mickey saying, "We'll both have burgers, with all the trimmings."

"Medium well?  Fries?" Edie said, writing on her notepad.

"Wait!  I can't possibly eat all that!  I said—"

"No, that's what we want.  Thanks." He said, dismissing her.

Edie turned and hurried away, muttering to herself about tension. 

I turned to Mickey.  "What's wrong with you?" I demanded.

"Nothing.  I just want you to have a good meal.  Don't order just a little because you think I'm poor!  C'mon!"  He was fuming.  I looked down at my hands and was silent.

I could feel him looking at me, but I wouldn't meet his gaze.

"'Lissa…" I heard him whisper.

"Mickey," I started, slowly lifting my eyes, "You mean so much to me, but you make me just as nervous."

He looked directly at me.  "What?" he said, disbelieving.

"I.. I just get all… all shaky inside… when you look at me."

"I'm sorry," he said and we both dropped our gaze.

"Gee, 'Lissa, I just want to hold you."

"What?" I said, and looked up at him.

"I want to hold you in my arms and feel you against me."

"Mickey…" was all I could say.  I wanted to be held by him.  I wanted to weave my fingers into his and kiss is gentle, soft lips.  I wanted…

"Here you are kids," Edie said, placing a large burger in front of each of us.

"Thanks," I said and watched her go.  "Oh, Mickey, I'll never be able to eat all this," I murmured.

"That's okay, we'll take the rest home to the Bowsers, alright?" was his reply.

I smiled then.  I didn't know what had made him so upset before, but I was glad somebody would be able to eat what I couldn't.

"Plus, I understand now why you didn't want more food, I make you too nervous to eat!" he told me, teasingly.

"You're right!" I answered and dug into my burger.

 

~

 

After we had ate our fill of the burgers and had boxed up the leftovers for the trio, Edie brought out a chocolate brownie topped with a scoop of ice cream.  There was a candle placed in it, and she lit it once she placed it in front of us.  A few of the other waitresses came over and they sang "Happy Birthday" to me.  Then I blew out the candle and Mickey helped me devour part of it.

By the time we finished that, Edie brought us the check and Mickey took it.  I watched him flinch slightly as he looked at it.

"What is it, baby?" I asked.

He sighed angrily.  "Can I borrow 3 dollars?"

I laughed at the irony and dug into my purse for the money.

Then Mickey paid and I bid good-bye to Edie.

"Be good you two!  And Happy Birthday again, Allyssa!"

"What now?" I asked Mickey as we stood together on the street.

"It's your birthday," he told me. 

I had no idea what I wanted to do.  "Let's go walking for a while and then we can take the food to the boys," I finally decided, and we headed off.

 

~

 

"Jack!  Jack!  Where are you, kid?" Mickey called.

"Aqui estoy, hermano," Jack said, sliding down from his perch in a nearby tree.  In his hands he held a small wooden fife.

"Whatcha been doing?" Mickey asked him.

"Practicing," Jack answered.  "What about you tow?"

"We've been out eating and just walking," Mickey told him.  "It's Allyssa's birthday."

"Ah, feliz cumpleaños, novia de mi amigo," he said.

"What?"

"Happy Birthday, girlfriend of my friend.  May I play something for you?" he asked.

"Certainly," I told him and sat in the grass beside Mickey.

As Jack began to play, I leaned against my lover.  His hands slipped around my waist, and I smiled.  Jack's music was beautiful, and it sounded ancient on his wooden flute.

There was no where else I wanted to be in that moment.  I felt myself falling asleep in the safety of Mickey's arms and he woke me up with a soft passionate kiss.  We moved together, spiraling deep into our own little world, letting our bodies lead us.  I vaguely registered Jack finishing playing and move off into the woods, but just then nothing mattered but Mickey.

We moved together.  We went in our passion to new places and new feelings;  places we'd never been and feelings we'd never felt.  I loved him and he loved me.  I was him and he was me.

I gasped as I felt his fingers tugging my shirt off and fiddling with the clasp on my bra.

"What?"  I pulled away slightly.  "What are you doing?"

He silenced me with a sloppy kiss.  "Happy birthday," he told me, taking my hands and pressing them against the front of his pants.

"Mickey… no…" I mumbled.  I could feel him, and he was very hard.  I was frightened.  I didn't want that. 

So I pushed him away.

"'Lissa," he groaned.

"I don't want…" was all I could manage.  My eyes were brimming with tears and I was shaking so badly.

"If it's protection you're worried about, I have…" he searched for his disgaurded coat jacket, "I have plenty of rubber."  He showed me the condom that had up until this point been hidden in the pocket of his jacket.

I shook my head violently, causing the tears to spill over.

"'Lissa, 'Lissa, I… I'm sorry.  'Lissa, don't cry.  We don't have to do that if you don't want.  I just thought that you'd like…  I mean…" he said, reaching out to me.

In truth, I did want to go further with him because I loved him very much, but all my common sense was telling me the results would not be good.  I didn't want to stop, but I knew something would go wrong.  I was so scared.  "Mickey, I had a very… nice time tonight," I forced myself to say, "but I'm going to go home now."

I collected my shirt, turned, and ran.  I didn't dare look back, for the sight  of him still lying, dismal, in the grass would surely shatter my weak heart.

He didn't call out for me as I expected him to, so I h ad no choice but to keep on running.

After I was a good distance away, I fell onto the forest floor, sobs racking my body.

"Allyssa," said a voice.

I looked up.  It was Jack.

"Allyssa," he repeated.  "Why are you crying?"

I fumbled for words.  "Mickey… I… wanted… I mean…"

"It's okay, beautiful.  Shhh.  Just calm down.  It'll be alright."  He pulled me into his embrace.

I sighed into it, trying to compose myself.  His hold was comforting to me.  It was like Mickey's and then it wasn't.

"He didn't hit you did he?" he asked me.

I shook my head; "He wanted to… wanted to…"  I just couldn't say it.

"...Have sex with you?" he asked cautiously.

I nodded.  I felt his hand moving in circular motions along my back, relaxing me.

I raised my head up to look at his face.  It was not as sharp as Mickey's, and Jack's eyes shown light into mine, contrasting against the deep brown of Mickey's deep-set ones.  Jack had the dark beginnings of a beard creeping along his chin to match the mop of black hair on his head.

"Are you going to be alright, Allyssa?" he asked me, his warm breath on my face.

I nodded slowly, snuggling closer to him.

Suddenly, I realized what in the world I was doing and pushed away.

"I'm sorry," Jack mumbled, hiding his face.

"I… I have to go."  I stood and fled.

I ran blindly through the woods, wanting desperately to be at home.  Finally, I reached the road and headed off toward my house.

When I burst through the door, I heard my mom call from the kitchen.  I went to her.

"Why home so early?" she asked, worry coming through in her voice. 

I fell into her arms as tears sprang to my eyes.

"What is it, baby?  What is it?" she asked me, holding me as I sobbed into her arms.

After I quieted, I asked my mother, "Mom, can I have birth control pills after all?"

 

~

 

I spent the whole weekend alone.  It was the longest weekend I could remember.  I moped around, organizing and reorganizing my room three hundred times.

Finally, Monday morning arrived.  I woke up early for no reason in particular and got dressed before sitting down to a large bowl of Cheerios.

Okay, I admit it, I was dead depressed.  There was really no reason for it.  Mickey hadn't forced me to do anything I hadn't wanted to do, but it still wasn't as if I had stuck around to find out.

And then Jack…  Well, he is a fine boy, and I'd have to admit that I do feel something for him, but it sure isn't the same as what I feel for Mickey.

I set out for school still pondering this, and I realized what the difference was.

In my relationship with Mickey, he is the dominant one, and if I were to date Jack, I would be the dominant one.

Wait.  I stopped myself.  Was I seriously considering loving Jack?  No, I couldn't!

I walked on dazedly, unaware of the figure lurking behind me.

He came closer and closer until he was able to slide his arms around my waist.

I screamed.

"Shh, 'Lissa, calm down.  It's only me."

I turned to face Mickey's beaming face.

I surprised even myself as I pushed him away.

"What?  Are you still upset with me?" he said, looking so down I couldn't stand it any longer.  I turned my back to him.

"'Lissa… please?"

I stopped and looked at him.  Then I reached out a hand and placed it on h is arm.

"Let's just hold back for a while," I told him, walking again, "At least until I'm on the pill."

He stopped in shock for a moment and I could just imagine the unbelieving grin on his face.

 

~

 

It was the weekend again, and all was well.  Mickey and I had kept our touching and kissing to a minimum, even though we spent every moment together.  With him and his friends around, there was never a dull moment.  In fact, the two of us now sat together on a city bus.

It was my first bus ride ever, and before now, I never even knew our town had city buses.  Mickey said you just had to know where to catch them.

"Creepy, huh?" he said, pointing to a man who had just gotten on.  He had a bright pink mohawk and uncountable number of piercing on his face and ears.

"Very," I said, moving closer to my blonde companion.  "When are you going to tell me where we're going?"

He hadn't told me where, only that we were going somewhere.

"When we get there," he said.

I was anxious.  Mickey was a mischievous fellow.  I went against my better judgment and slid my arms around his thin waist, leaning on him.

"I love you," he told me.

"I love you more," I answered, beaming.

"Here's our stop," he said, pulling the cord.

We got off the squeaky bus in front of a large grey stone church.

"Mickey, what in the world are we doing here?" I exclaimed.

He pointed to the sign.  Under the church's name, it read "Potluck dinner. Sunday 3:00"

I looked at Mickey and he beamed at me.  "It's a fine life," he sang, leading me inside the church's special building.

It was buzzing with people, waiting in line for food, sitting, eating, talking.  Mickey and I joined the line.

"Isn't it great?" he asked me as we filled our plates with bits from all sorts of strange dishes.

"Yeah, great…" I told him, laughing.

We moved to sit down.  Together, we ate and even went back for second helpings.  There were plenty of strange looks sent our way, but no one said anything to us until we got up to leave.

When we were almost to the door, a younger guy came up to us.

"Hey," the boy said.

"Hey," Mickey said, sliding a protective arm round my waist.  The boy watched the motion intently, as if it unnerved him.

"You all aren't members of this church, are you?" he asked.

Mickey shook his head.

"Well this dinner is only for members, you know that right?"

Mickey looked at the floor and then back up at the boy.  "Yes, I know.  But we're hungry.  Don't have jobs.  Our mom is sick.  Real sick.  In the mind.  She doesn't even know who we are nowadays.  You understand, right?"

"Oh… yeah, sure.  That's okay.  If you need help, our doors are always open, of course."

"Thanks."  Mickey extended his hand.  "It's good to know someone cares.  I'm Mickey and this is Allyssa."

"Josef," said the boy, accepting Mickey's handshake and nodding to me.

"Look," Mickey said, "We gotta git, but we'll be sure to come back if we ever need anything else."

"Bye," said Josef.

Mickey and I walked out the door.  He was such a smooth talker.  Either that or the boy was extremely gullible.  I laughed and swatted Mickey on the arm.

"That was a horrid lie," I told him.

"So?  It'll get me and the boys free food.  It's definitely worth it," he answered.

"Oh, come, let's go home," I said, pulling him along.

 

~

 

I went home early that night, wishing and not wishing to stay out late with Mickey.  I chose to play it safe and came home.  He understood, plus he had plans with the Bowsers.

"Allyssa, will you come in here for a minute?" my mom called.

"Sure," I said and went to her.  I went through the living room, and strangely, my dad wasn't sitting in his chair. That was odd.

"Surprise!" my mom said when I came into the kitchen. 

My dad was standing beside her, and beside him on the table was a beautiful violin.

"Wow…  I can't believe it!"  I reached out and stroked the instrument.  "I love you!  I love you!  I love you!" I said, hugging my parents again.  Then I took the violin in m y arms and stroked it.  I picked up the bow and slid it across the strings as I had seen Mickey do numerous times   A horrible noise came from it.  "Well… I guess I need a little practice," I told my company.

My dad grumbled something unintelligible and moved off toward his chair, pausing at the fridge.  My mom also disappeared somewhere and I was left alone with my wonderful birthday gift.

 

~

 

It was the next afternoon and I was standing alone in front of Brennon's Strings Etc.  I wasn't sure how I was going to go about taking lessons here without Mickey finding out, but I wanted to surprise him nonetheless.  So I went inside the dimly lit store.

"Hey there!"  Brennon said, appearing from his back room.  "Allyssa, right?  Mickey's girl?  What are you doin' here all alone, beautiful?"

"I… I want to learn to play the violin!" I stuttered, showing him my new instrument.

"Well why don't you get Mickey to show you?  He'd be a great teacher."

"I really want to surprise him!"

So Brannon consented and took my violin in his hands. 

"This is a really good violin," he murmured, then handed it back to me.  "Here," he told me, "hold it like this."  He showed me.

As I held the instrument poised to play, Brannon searched for a book.  He opened it and showed me a chart.  "Place your fingers here, like it shows…"

 

~

 

I learned steadily after that, meeting secretly with Brannon after school.  I avoided Mickey during these times by telling him I had to meet my mom or go to the doctors or take care of my dad, or even study.  I wasn't sure if he believed me and was sure he missed me.  I was worried that he thought I was avoiding him because I wanted to break up, so whenever I was with him I kissed him sweetly.  We were young and in love, and I couldn't wait to give my lover his surprise.

That day as Brannon and I finished our violin lesson, he told me, "I think you're ready to show Mickey now, Allyssa."

"Really?" I gawked at him.  "Already?"

"Yeah, play that one by (Composer)."  I started to play it and he nodded vigorously.  "Just like that, he'll love it!"

I grinned.

 

~

 

"Jack!  Jack!" I called out to the dark-headed junior high kid as he came through the bushes.

"Allyssa!  Hey!  What's goin' on?" he asked, coming to me.

"I need your help with something," I told him, showing him my cased violin.

"What's that?" he asked.

"I've been learning to play the violin.  Mickey doesn't know.  I'm going to surprise him!  But I need you to hold my violin while I bring him, okay?"

Jack thought.  "Sure, but one question…"

"Yeah?"

"Will you play for me?"

I agreed and unpacked my instrument.  Jack sat in the grass, and there, by the pond, I played all that I knew.  All for my lover's friend whom I also might love.

But it wasn't the same.  Jack was too young for me and Mickey would be furious  if I ever acted on these inklings of feeling.  Although it was not right, Jack's light eyes on me gave me a thrill, and I knew because of his gentle stare, that the feeling I was trying to hide was mutual.

When I was out of things to play, I smiled at him.  "What do you think?" I asked.

He looked away.  "I think… I think that I'm in love with my best friend's girlfriend…"

I gently set down my violin and crouched in front of him, taking his hands.  "Jack… I think I love you too… But I do love Mickey.  More than you.  So we can't act on these feelings.  We can't!"

But still I sat beside him, resting my head on his shoulder.  He put his arm around my waist, and he leaned over and kissed me.  It was no small peck either.  At first I leaned into it, but then I caught myself and pushed him away.  Not that I didn't like it.  It was just… it wasn't right!

I stood and looked down at Jack.  We watched one another.  And it was then that I knew.

Jack would always dream about me, but if we were never alone together nothing would ever happen.  I would never have fantasies about him.

"You just wait here," I told him, dashing off to find Mickey, the boy who occupied all my dreams.

 

~

 

            "Where are you taking me?" Mickey asked, laughing.  He had his eyes closed and I led him along by the hand.

            "Here we are," I told him.

            He looked around.  "Wow," was all he said.  I had taken him to the pond where I had left Jack.  The younger boy had strung the tree with flowering vines, and butterflies of every color and shape fluttered around it.

I would have to thank him later… If I could ever allow myself to see him again without losing focus.

I looked at Mickey with guilt.  Then I sighed and went to my violin, picking it up lovingly from its place at the foot of the tree.

I saw a smile creep along Mickey's face and I set up to play.  When I struck the first note, he was beaming brightly.  I played my heart out for him, but only that one song.

When I finished, he applauded and I smiled, setting down my violin and going into his arms.

"Where did you learn that?" he marveled, after hugging me tightly.

"I asked Brannon to teach me so I could surprise you.  Did I?" I answered him.

"Yes, definitely!  What was it that you played?  Let me see this beautiful thing!"  He took the violin from me and inspected it.

He smiled and me and set it up to play.  He played an amazing tune, but suddenly his face and his whole composure shattered.  He fell down to the ground and hid his face.

"Mickey?"  I sat beside him and ran my hand comfortingly along his back.  "Are you okay, baby?"

"I… I'm sorry.  It's just… You're living my dream."

I took my violin and put it away.  Then I sat again and took Mickey in my arms. 

He leaned on me and I leaned on him.  We were happy like that and we stayed there, together and silent, for a long, long time.

 

~

 

The next day, I joined the orchestra at school.  Both Mickey and Brannon continued teaching me.

Mickey loved me.  Jack loved me too,  but I wouldn't let him show it.

At least until one fateful day in early May.  I had stayed late practicing at school and was out looking for Mickey when I ran into Jack.

"Hey Allyssa," he said, waving to me.

"Hi Jack," I said.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"Just looking for Mickey," I told him.

"Oh.  He's gone with Matt and Mark to see Eric.  He won't be back until tomorrow."

"Eric…?"

"Our brother in college, remember?"

"Oh yeah."

"So you wanna hang out with me, chica bonita?"

I had to stop and think about that one.  If I were to stay with Jack… what would happen?

In the few moments of silence I had used for my thoughts, Jack shrugged and started to drift away.

"Hey… Wait, Jack!"  I ran to him.  "I… I want to hang out with you, but I don't want to be in love with you."

"Alright," he said, and kept walking.

"Jack, look.  I know you are in love with me, and believe me, I have feelings for you too… It's just…  I can't let those feelings show if I still want to be with Mickey."  I was struggling to keep up with him.

"I understand," he said, still walking.

"No Jack, I don't think you do!"  I grabbed his arm and forced him to stop.  "I'm not rejecting you because I want to, I'm doing it because—"

He kissed me.  It was a long, deep kiss meant to take my breath away.

I shoved him hard and turned away from him to hide my hideous tears.

The boy only stood there.

Then I had a sudden realization.  Mickey wasn't here.  He wouldn't be back until tomorrow.  And here, standing in front of me, was a boy who was eager to go far with me.

"Jack," I said softly.  I took a step closer to him so my body touched his.

"Allyssa," he said wonderingly.

I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him passionately.

"Ooh la la," he murmured and kissed me back.  We moved like there was no tomorrow, because for us, there never would be.

"Damn," he breathed as he dragged his hands under my clothing.  What we were doing was very uncharacteristic of both of us, but we were still doing it. 

He tugged off my shirt and I pulled at his.  As I did this, I felt the rippled muscles on his chest and couldn't help but tremble.  He held me tight for a moment but then we pushed on as he fumbled with the clasp on my jeans.  I helped him with it, and then I pulled off his pants, pressing myself to him. 

We kissed, us both lying in our underwear.  His fingers slid under my bra strap and then he pulled it off of me, cradling my breasts in his hands.  I massaged his neck with my lips, but paused as I felt his hands begin to push off my silk panties.

"Are you sure…?" I mumbled.

"No," was his reply and so I took the next step and pushed off his boxers, dragging my fingers lightly across his manhood.  He groaned softly and then his hands went down into my folds, moving the panties away.  I murmured his name "mmh, Jack…" and he slid down to lick me there.  I took a few deep breaths and then it was my turn to give him a round of oral sex.  Oh how perfect he was then.

"I want to…" he said incoherently and pushed his hard self deep into me.  I moaned loudly, my whole body shaking.  He thrust his hips with mine several times.  I was crying when he pulled away from me and came all over my stomach.  With one last groan I felt a final wetness in-between my legs and then I leaned against Jack's warm body.

I had, all in one moment, lost my virginity and betrayed the man I wished to spend my life with.  I didn't understand why and presently I didn't care, so I leaned into Jack's embrace.  He kissed me gently several times as his hands followed the curves of my body in relaxing circles.

"I love you," he whispered.

I snuggled closer and silently cried myself to sleep in his arms.

 

~

 

"Mickey…" I muttered, stretching.  I felt sweaty and dirty and terribly tired.  I searched around for my clothes and tried to remember why I wasn't wearing them.  My eyes fell on Jack.

Oh.  My.  God.

I sprung from the ground and ran through the woods, taking my clothes with me.  When I was an acceptable distance away, I stopped to put on my clothes, wondering what time it possibly could have been.  Since I felt like crap and didn't know what else to do, I pushed on towards home.

"'Lissa!" 

I whirled around, and there was Mickey, standing at the base of a huge tree, looking like a god.

I burst into tears.

A.)  I wanted to go into his arms and have him tell me it was all alright, but he didn't move.

"I hate you," he growled.

"Mickey… wh…"  I stopped.  "Oh."  I hung my head shamefully, and when I looked up, he was gone.

"Shit," I muttered.  It was all over.  He must have known.

B.) He came to me and held me tightly.  I loved him so much.

As I leaned on him, I registered that he was trembling.  A wave of guilt washed over me along with the horrible realization that I smelled badly.

"Mickey… I…"  My body shook with the effort.

He touched my face, and I looked up at him.

There was fire there in his eyes and I let out a whimper at the sight of it.

"I know," he said, cupping my cheek in his hand and tracing my cheekbone.  "And I hate you for doing it.  So you know what I have to do, right?"

I couldn't believe it.  I was living a nightmare.  "No…  No…  No…"  I could barely stand up.

"Allyssa, we're through."

He turned and walked away, leaving me standing alone with my mouth hanging open.  He'd never called me plain Allyssa before.  Never.

            I wanted to go home.  So I turned and ran far away from these woods that had so drastically changed my life.

            I drifted into the house and upstairs into the shower.  As I stood under the warm water, I made sure I was all there.  Slowly, I closed my eyes and reviewed the events of the evening in my head.  A vision of Mickey's face appeared in my head and I felt a horrid rush of nausea. I lurched out of the shower, bent over the toilet, and retched my insides clean.

            Once there was nothing left in my stomach to come up, I lied on the bathroom rug and cried until my eyes were large, red, and puffy.  Finally, I felt most of the badness was washed out of my system by vomiting and crying, so I went to my room and put on my favorite purple pajamas.

            I wanted to talk to my mother, so I went downstairs to see if she was asleep.

            Luck put a hand on me for just a moment, for my mother was sitting on the couch watching an infomercial on mute, reading the captions.

            "Hi Mom," I whispered, sitting down beside her and curling up.  "What's wrong, Mom?" I asked her.  She was eating her comfort food—a mix of popcorn, m&m's, and raisins.  She had always told me how her mother used to make it for her when she was down as a little kid.

"It's your father.  He's starting to worry me. All he does is sit in his recliner over there, drinking all day, and then he goes to sleep, gets up, and does it all over again.  And I'm stuck working all the time just to get us by."  She paused and let out a sigh.  "What's wrong on your end?  Why are you up?"

I ate some of her comfort food.  "I don't know how to tell you, Momma, I just don't."

She slid an arm around my shoulders and we sat together watching a muted infomercial on some kitchen appliance called the Magic Bullet.  It was really cheesy, but being with my mother definitely helped, and soon I creeped off to my bed.

 

~

 

My alarm went off bright and early.  I was dreading going to school, so I got up and stumbled down into the kitchen.

"Mom," I said when I found her, "I don't feel like going to school.  Can I stay home?"

"Well… what will you do?"

"Sleep."

"You won't miss any tests, will you?"

I shook my head.

"Alright."

So I made my way upstairs and back into bed. I only registered one thought before I fell back again into sleep.

"Why'd she let me stay home?"

 

~

 

I walked to school alone that morning for the first time since I met Mickey.  It made me sad an angry.  It also didn't help that I was running late. 

On my way into the building, I saw Mickey being dragged into the principal's office by one of the meanest teachers.  And the school day hadn't even begun yet.  I wondered what he had done.  He met my eyes for a moment.  First there was only a pleading look but then he scowled and his eyes grew dark.  I was breaking his heart.

I spent the day alone, taking my classes in a daze, walking down different hallways to avoid him, skipping lunch even. 

When my last class of the day arrived, I retreated to the orchestra room to play the rest of my time at school away on my violin.  I heard the final bell ring, I gathered my things to start heading home.  As I exited the building, I saw Mickey ahead, so I held back, just watching him.  My heart raced and I longed to be beside him as I noticed the slump of his shoulders and the stride that he took.

I was about to call out to him—who knows what for—when Jack stumbled out of the bush and straight into me.  He was breathing hard as if he had been sprinting.

"Allyssa," he panted and took my hand, pulling me behind the bushes.

I gasped as I noticed the bad bruises all over him.

"Jack, what—" I started, but he put a hand over my lips.

He explained, "It was Mickey.  I'm not even supposed to look at you, but I have to know…  Are you regretting this as much as I am?  I mean, it wouldn't have been that bad except you're Mickey's girl.  It wasn't that I wanted to break you two up.  I just wanted you for myself.  I'm sorry…  I didn't mean…  I mean…  I didn't…  I…"

I couldn't help it.  I was crying.  I couldn't tell if Jack was or not, but he sounded distraught nonetheless.

He reached out to me, but I jerked away.  He came a step closer, and I was about to turn to run when Mickey tackled him from behind with a yell. 

"Don't you touch her!"

They rolled together on the ground, and I couldn't tell who was on top.  I feared for Mickey because I knew that Jack, although shorter and younger, had more muscle power.

Mickey shouted at me, "Get the hell out of here you stupid bitch!"  Which meant he still hated me, but wasn't going to let me get hurt.  I flamed with anger inside.  If he didn't want me as his girl, then I had a right to be with whoever I wanted.

But I wanted him.

I ran away even though I didn't want to go home, because I knew I didn't want to stay there with the two boys that had ruined my life.  So I was just running, going, and thinking of ways to get revenge on them.

Somehow, I found myself come to a halt in front of the police office.

I dried my tears, straightened my clothes, and fixed my hair before taking a deep breath and going inside.  It was dark and creepy as I passed through the doors.

"Can I help you?" a man behind a big desk greeted me.

"Um…"  How should I put this?  "I have a complaint."

"Oh do you?" he said, smugly.

"You know about the homeless problem around here, right?"  I leaned against the desk and let my voice come out so quietly that he had to lean closer to hear.  "I know where they're hiding."

"Oh do you?" he said again, voice almost as soft as mine.  He slid a pad a paper and a pen across his desk so he could write himself a note.

"In a field behind Burken Street.  You'll find all of them there."

"Oh," he said slyly.  "What's it to you?"

"I just… feel that they need to be… taken care of.  If you know what I mean."  I reached out my hand and grazed his arm with my fingertips.

He finally broke my gaze to watch my hand.  "Well…  Can I get your name, miss?"

"Oh," I said, and thought.  I really didn't want to give this baffoon my name, so I made up one.  "It's Minnie," I said, "Minnie Mouser."

"Oh," was his reply.  "Your real name, please."

Ah.  That's what he wanted.  "That's what they call me," I told him, batting my eyelashes flirtatiously.  "If that's all you need, I have other things to be doing today."  Like what?

He nodded, studying my chest.  So I turned and walked out, using my sexiest walk.

Once the door shut behind me, I took off running.

 

~

 

I didn't have to wait very long for the consequences of my actions to appear.

The next morning, I told my mom I felt really sick, and it wasn't much of a lie, so I spent the whole day sleeping.  When I woke up late that afternoon, the sky reflected my feelings.  It was full of large, fluffy, grey clouds that promised a storm soon.

I made myself a bowl of macaroni and sat down in front of the TV to watch a few hours of SpikeTV with my dad.

"Hey Allyssa," Mom called from the kitchen, "Come here and look at the sky."

I pulled myself up from the sofa and to the window where my mom was looking.  There, underneath the natural grey clouds was the largest could of black smoke I had ever seen in my life.

"Oh my," I said, "I wonder what's on fire…"  But I already had a horrible feeling about it.

"I don't know, but it looks bad.  We'll have to watch the news tonight and find out."

I felt like I was going to pass out, so I went back upstairs and laid on my bed, watching the smoke from outside my window.

I was almost back asleep when I heard the first clap of thunder.  Looking out the window, I saw that the clouds had become almost as dark as the smoke.  It was going to start raining soon.

"Allyssa!  Dinner's ready!" my mom called up to me, so I clambered down again to eat my mom's turkey sandwiches.  She flipped on the television.

I didn't want to watch it, so I took my sandwich out to the porch to watch the storm.  I sat, and after a while my mom came out.

"Find out what's on fire, Mom?"

"Yeah, it's just an abandoned field.  The police think there might be a criminal hiding there."

"Crap" I thought, jumping up.

I had to find Mickey.  "Mom, I'm going for a walk.  I'll be back before it starts to rain."

  And I was gone before she could protest.

I pushed into the woods and broke into a run.  "Up ahead I should find him.  Up ahead is where he should be," I continued telling myself as I shot into a clearing.  The air was thick with smoke and muggy because of the storm.

"Mickey!" I choked, shouting for him.  All I heard was the roar of the fire off in the distance.

Wait.  On the right.  A horse whiny.  I ran towards it.

There, tied up to a tree was Mickey's black beast.  Well, it wasn't really his, but…

I reached up a hand to touch it's nose.  "Shhh beautiful, it's alright."  The animal blew air into my hand and whinnied again.  It was so frightened.  I needed to get it out of here.

So I braved my fear and climbed up onto its bare back.  I reached down and untied the rope from the tree, holding on for dear life.

 

~

 

Somehow, I maneuvered the horrified horse back through the woods.  I reached the house, sliding off the beast and tying it to the post on the porch just as my mom came outside.

"Allyssa…wha—?"

"I had to save it, Mom.  He would have died."

"But… it can't stay here!"

"It's okay for now though, right?  I promise its owner will come get it after the storm, okay?"

"Well…"

As my mother was speaking, it began to rain, so we forgot about the horse for the moment.  Instead of fighting about it, we went inside to watch the weather.

Once I was reassured that it would rain all night long, I decided to go upstairs and practice my violin.  As I passed through the living room, my dad called out to me.

"Where'd that horse come from?"

I did a 180° turn back to the fridge, grabbed a Bud Lite, and plopped it into his lap.  "Don't ask."  Then I disappeared up the stairs.

 

~

 

I played the night away on my instrument until the storm died down to just a steady rain.  I had stopped playing for a short break and was lying on my bed organizing my thoughts and slowly drifting into sleep when my mom called up to me.

"Hold on!" I shouted down, pulling myself up with a considerable effort.

"No, I'd get down here now!" she hollered back.

I was surprised at her tone, and hurried down.  "Wha-aat?" I whined.

"Shhh, look!"  She pointed out the window, and I followed her gaze, looking out into the rainy night

Standing there, looking like a drowned puppy, was Mickey.

I was shocked.  What was he doing out there?

"He's been standing there for almost 10 minutes now, Allyssa!"

I watched him for a moment more.  He was completely still.

Bursting through the door, I ran through the rain and threw myself at him, wrapping my arms tightly around his neck.  He slumped against me, and I could feel him trembling.  When I smelled the smoke lingering in his hair, it broke my heart.

"Mickey, Mickey, Mickey, forgive me, please forgive me!"

I was crying, but no one could tell because of the rain.

"I can't live without you," Mickey said, so soft in my ear.

I looked into his eyes and he looked into mine.  Slowly, he leaned in and kissed me, washing completely away every single mistake of the past few days.

Together, we turned and went inside where my mother greeted us with warm towels.

I was in love, and I knew I would never, ever do anything to hurt him again.

 

~

 

After changing into some dry clothes, I came down the stairs to see Mickey sitting at the table eating a bowl of Froot Loops, wearing only a pair of blue boxers and a towel draped over his shoulders.  I could see him shivering, so I brought him a blanket.  When I handed it to him, he smiled at me and his eyes continued watching me as I sat beside him and poured a few Froot Loops into a bowl for myself.

I nibbled on my cereal, feeling his eyes on me.  In a moment, I spared him a glance, trying unsuccessfully not to giggle.  I ate another Froot loop, and looked at him again, more serious this time.  Oh how beautiful he was, this boy sitting here in my kitchen half naked.

I smiled, noticing how much he had grown up in the year since I first met him.  I wondered if I had grown up too.  As I pondered, I felt him slip his hand onto my knee and I covered it with my own.

"Who the hell are you!" my dad growled.

I jumped.  "Dad!"  Oh gosh.  "Please don't hurt him, Daddy," I prayed to myself.

"Dad, this is Mickey."  I stood between the two men.

"What's he doing here this late at night?"

I tried to be rational.  "He has to stay here tonight because he doesn't have anywhere else to sleep.  Please don't be upset Dad, just go to sleep and don't worry any more."

I was afraid of what result my words would bring, but still I held my ground.

My father growled again as if he wanted to shout, but the thought of going to bed was stronger and he simply thundered off.

I sat again, and the two of us were quiet for a while.

"Mickey, I'm worried about him," I said softly, confiding in my sweetheart and best friend.

"Well…  It's not your fault if he amounts to nothing.  Like you s aid, don't worry.  You should only worry about what you can change, and that is yourself."

I smiled at my brilliant boyfriend.  "Thanks Mickey."

After another moment, my mom came in.

"Can Mickey stay the night, Mom?" I asked, cautious.

She thought.  "Sure, I guess so.  He can sleep on the couch."  Yawning, she added, "I'm going to bed.  Goodnight you two."

"Night Mom."

When Mickey was finished eating, I took his hand and showed him the couch and the bathroom.  Finally, we kissed goodnight and I went up to my room.

 

~

 

I lay there in the dark, just thinking.  How could I sleep when my true love was just downstairs?  I felt a horrible guilt for causing him to lose the only home he ever had.

These thoughts got the best of me, so I got up and crept down to the living room.

"Mickey!" I hissed into the darkness.

"'Lissa!" I heared him asnwer.

"Come with me," I whispered to him.  We clasped hands and I led him up to my room, shutting the door behind us.

He stood in the middle of the room, awkwardly, looking around at my things.  Grinning, he went and picked up a pink fuzzy pen.  Holding it to his upper lip, he gave himself a pink mustache.  He put on a funny voice and said, "Oh look at me I'm a stiff old politician that wants to rule the world.  Blah, blah, blah."

I laughed at his antics and hopped on my bed.  "Come here, you."

"Ooh, ooh, look I'm growing backwards!  Auugh!"  He pretended to melt, dropping to the floor.  Then he sprang up and pounced on the bed.  I caught him and kissed him lovingly.

We kissed for a while longer, and then we both settled down to sleep.

If he had pushed to do more, I would have without hesitating, but he didn't, and I was happy.

I snuggled up to him and fell into a wonderfully deep sleep.

 

~

 

In the morning, I woke up alone.

Yawning, I sat up and listening to the early morning silence.  I heard my mother's laughter and the sound of a violin drift up the stairs.  At the sound, my eyes looked toward my where my violin should have been, but it wasn't there, so I got up and went downstairs.  However, I stopped at the bottom, for there in the kitchen, my mom was cooking, and Mickey was charming her by telling jokes and playing on my violin.  I loved the sight.

I stepped out so they would see me.

"Come sit down and have some pancakes with us, baby," Mom said, setting down a plate full of steaming pancakes on the table.

The three of us chowed down, and after we had eaten our fill, Mickey asked, "Will you come with me to take Al home, 'Lissa?"

"Huh?  Who's Al?"

He motioned towards the front porch.  "The horse?"

I agreed immediately.

 

~

 

We rode up to the charred field, me sitting behind Mickey, leaning on him.  In the middle of the burnt grass, we slowed, stopping to look around. 

There was nothing left.

Mickey slid off the horse, and the beast shifted as he fell to his knees on the black ground.

Filling his fists with ashes, he pressed his face down to his knees.  Then he groaned loudly, straightening his back and turning his face to the sky.  "Why, God!  Why did you let this happen?  Dammit, why do I have such bad luck!" he shouted in anguish, throwing ashes into the air.

"Mickey…  Mickey, come on, let's go do something else, please?" I begged, reaching a hand down to him. 

I needed to get away from this disaster that I had caused.  I needed to yell, as Mickey just had.  I needed to run away and never come back.

Mickey gave the sky and the ashen ground all around one last look and then grabbed my hand.

I realized as his hand touched mine, that there was no way I could run away.  I needed to stay here with my love, my true love.

Finally, he climbed up in front of me and we rode off, going nowhere in particular.

"Wanna go to the drive-in and get something to eat?" he asked after a while.

"Yeah, sure," I answered as Mickey steered Al the horse in the right direction.

When we got there, we tied the animal up to one of the boxes. 

Mickey pulled out a ten dollar bill.  "Hm…" he said, "how much've you got?"

I searched my pockets and found five dollars.

"Awesome, what are you getting?" he asked.

"A corn dog!" I told him, excited.  "I haven't had one of those since my dad took me to the fair in the 2^nd grade."

He laughed and pushed the button.

A cheery female voice came from the machine.  "Welcome to Tony's Drive In.  What can I get you?"

"Yeah, gimmie 7 corn dogs and a large chocolate shake."

"That'll be 9.79.  It'll be right out!"

"Mickey!  Why 7?"

"I'm gonna feed Al too?"

"Corn dogs?"

"Well, she gets hungry too."  He laughed and took my hand, leading me over to the picnic tables.

"Hey, you know why I named her Al, don't you?" he said, motioning to the horse as we sat down.  I didn't know.  "It's cause you're 'Lissa," he told me, wrapping his arms around my waist and snuggling his head under my chin.  "And that's Al."  He laughed and so did I.

I toyed with his unruly hair and we fell into companionable silence.

Suddenly, he pushed away from me and burst out, "Why did you do that with Jack?"

I grew sad, and showed it.  "Oh Mickey…"

"'Lissa, I'm not hating you, I just have to know."

So I struggled to explain myself.  "I…  It wasn't that I wanted to cheat on you, Mickey…  It was just… that…  I mean…  Well, Jack was there and I could see how he loved me…  and I knew he wanted me so bad…  I just…  Gave him what he wanted.  But it wasn't the same as you!  And I almost died with guilt.  And I would die a million times to have it erased.  Yes."  I stopped and looked pleadingly into his eyes.

So he kissed me.

"'Lissa, 'Lissa, I love you.  Love you," he murmured, holding my hands.

"I have another confession to make."

He looked into my eyes.

"I'm the one that told them where you were living."  I looked away.  "It's my fault they burned your field.  I'm so sorry."

He looked at me in shock.

I felt my eyes burn with tears, but he simply wrapped his arms around me and nuzzled his head under my chin, hiding his face in my breast.  I weaved my fingers thro9ugh his hair and held him, feeling him breathing with that familiar catch on the ottake.

Aftrer a short while, he moved to look straight at me.

"'Lissa, I just can't believe it.  Just…  Don't tell it to me.  Forget about it."  He kissed me.

When we broke apart, we looked over to where we had left Al.  A waitress was standing there looking completely lost, as if she was thinking, "This horse ordered 7 corn dogs?"

Mickey and I laughed and went to get our food.

We sat at the picnic tables across from one another, sharing the milkshake and eating our share of the corn dogs.  When we were through, we fed Al, and had fun doing that.

So when all the food was consumed, the two of us rode off to find the Bowsers.

 

~

 

It turned out that the three of them had taken up refuge at the church we had gone to eat at.  They could stay there as long as they wanted to.

Mickey stayed at my house, mostly, and things continued happily like this through the end of our senior year, when the bomb was dropped.

Mickey and I were walking home together when he pulled me into a jewelry shop.

"Mickey, what are you doing?"

He pointed to a case full of diamond rings.

"Pick one," he told me.

I walked over and looked in, completely confused.  "What?"

He slid an arm around my waist.  "Just pick one."

"Why?  They're all so expensive!"

He whispered in my ear, "I love you.  Now are you gonna pick one or not?"

"Alright, alright."

So I surveyed the case.  There.  I saw the one I wanted.  It had a simple silver band and one small perfect diamond, surrounded by two even smaller blue sapphires.

I showed it to Mickey.

He nodded approvingly and went to buy it.

"How in the world are you ever going to pay for that?  I don't need a ring!"

"Yes, you do.  And don't worry about it.  I've been saving up money and so have the boys.  Mostly Jack though."  He took the ring from the clerk.  "So now I have to do something."

And so, there in the middle of the jewelry store, Mickey went awkwardly down on one knee.

"Allyssa Michelles, will you marry me?"

I choked up.  "Wh…  Wh…"  This was completely unexpected.

So I turned and fled.

 

~

 

"Mom!  Mom!  Where are you?" I shouted as I burst into the house.

"Right here, Allyssa!" she called back from the laundry room.

"Mom… he asked me to marry him!"

"No?" she said, disbelieving.  "Did you say yes?"

"I…  I didn't say anything.  I just ran."

"What?  You didn't say anything?  Don't you want to marry him?"

"I…  I do, but… maybe not right now, Mom.  Not as we're about to graduate."

"So tell him that."

"Well…  I guess…  What do you think about me marrying Mickey?"

She thought for a moment.  "I agree with what you said.  Maybe in a few years.  And you really haven't dated anyone else, have you?  So why don't you take a year off from dating him, go to college, meet some new people.  Then you can make a decision."

"Mom…"  I knew what I wanted now.  "I don't want to date other people!"

"So marry him."

"Not now."

So I had to find Mickey.

I turned to go.  "Thanks Mom!"

As I wandered down the sidewalk, I thought about where he would have gone.  Finally I decided to go by the jewelry store and then to check the church.

He wasn't in the store or anywhere else between there and my house, so I pushed on.

On my way to the church, I had a thought that he might be at Brannon's so I poked my head in there.

"Brannon! Hey, 've you seen Mickey?"

"Hey chickie.  Nah, he ain't been by today."

"Gosh.  Well, if you see him, tell him I'm looking for him."

I turned to go and then had another thought.

"Oh, Brannon, guess what!"

"What?"

"He proposed!"

"No way!  You say yes, babe?"

"Not yet, that's why I've got to find him!  See ya!"

"Bye chickie!" he hollered back at me.

As the bell jingled bheindme, I dashed off, happy and exited now.

 

~

 

I ran up and knocked on the door of the church's spare building where the Bowsers were staying.  I heard a commotion just inside and a shout of "Shape up, it might be the pastor!"

Then Jack opened the door.

This was a bit of a surprise for me because I hadn't seen him in the last year at all.

"Hi Jack," I finally managed.

"Allyssa," he answered.

Then there was a period of awkward silence.

"What can I do for you?" he asked.

"Oh…  I'm looking for Mickey.  Is he here?"

"No, he isn't, but he might be soon if he's not with you.  Come in."

Cautiously, I took his invitation and went on inside.

The place was filthy.  There were clothes and garbage everywhere, and from what I could tell, more than the four boys had been living in the two bedroom building.

"Hey Allyssa!" Matthew shouted at me from where he was sitting on Mark's stomach, punching him playfully.

"Hey Matt," I said as Mark pushed matthew over.

"Here," Jack said, going over to a tan colored sofa and clearing it off.  "Have a seat."

So I did.

"Want anything to drink?"

"No, thanks though."  I wsn't sure what I was still doing there.

"So…  How's Mickey been treating you?"

Conversation with Jack was forced and awkward, and from the way he was looking at me, he still wanted me for himself.

"Actually… he proposed."

"Oh?"  His face drooped.

"Yes, we're going to get married."  I said this with confidence and finality, even if I didn't tell him exactly when I meant us to.

"So you'll be moving to New York with us?"

"What?!  New York…?"

"Yeah, didn't Mickey tell you?  We've found an offer for a warehouse in New York.  We're moving after graduation."

"Wha…  Wha…"  I was shocked and I could feel tears burning in my eyes.  "Jack, I'm sorry but I better be getting home."

I stood up and hurried to the door.  As I threw it open, I ran smack into Mickey.

"Hey girl."

I threw my arms around his neck.

"Mickey, why didn't you tell me you were moving?"

He reached up and tugged nervously on his ear.  "Well… I was hopin' you'd say yes to me and come with us." 

He took the ring out of his pocket and slid it on my finger.  "Won't you?"

I looked at the ring and then at Mickey's eager face.

I took his hand and said, "Come on, let's walk."

So we drifted down the sidewalk.

When we were out of sight of the church, I hugged him and kissed him sweetly, leaving him wanting more, but I said, "Mickey, the answer, in truth, is yes, but I can't marry you right now.  I've got to go through college and I just can't get up and leave my family, Mickey.  Maybe you going to New York without me would be the best for both of us, even.  I mean, we haven't spent a day apart in over a year, you k now?  Mickey?"

"You… you aren't breaking up with me, are you?"

He squeezed my hands hard.

"No!  No, Mickey, that's not it.  I just can't marry you now.  But maybe later, alright?"

"Kiss me," he murmured.

So I did, and I was sure he understood.

 

~

 

Two weeks after Mickey and I graduated, he and the Bowsers moved.  Every day the two of us wrote letters back and forth.  Mickey got a job at a hot dog stand in New York, or so he said, while I went to Texas University to continue playing the violin.  By the time my senior year of college came around, I had decided to go into realty, selling houses, and for now, everyone was happy, just waiting for what the future would hold.  But until it comes around, we just have to make it through today. J

THE END

 

(Don't worry, there is a sequel!)

Once again, feel free to IM me at grassizgreen4 (aim), [email protected] (msn and email), or 272686627 (icq).  Hope you enjoye.