~*Hollow Heart*~
December 30, 2003
Mood - Annoyed
Ok, first off let this be a warning to all who decided to read, this is NOT i repeat, NOT an entry of how my day was. This is an entry of all my feelings and frustrations as of late. So if you continue to read it is at your own risk, these are my feelings if you dont like em, well maybe stop and think why i am feeling like this and maybe you can do something to switch em eh? Now...let us begin.

I'll start this by simply saying Ange and I broke up. This break up was much more simple and less painful than all the others i have been through, but thaz wut makes me wonder. It was just so straight forward, so simple. Why have none of the others been like that...maybe, cuz maybe the others weren't like this one? Ahhh, i have no clue, women confuse me and i wish i could live without em. Ironically, the night before i was talking to alicia who noted that in aproximately 10 we'll be 25 and most of our friends will be married and startin families. I replied by saying "I'm so screwed." lol...then look wut happened the next day? I have to laugh at it, just truly, i do. From the beginning i wondered, i truly wondered, maybe i have issues with depression. But now i realise, no i haven't, i never have and this whole time ive been seeing what HAS been happening. I'm not blind so don't treat me like i am. I get very angry when people use, toy with, or lie to me. Lies are the least of my issues, everybody lies, but lies about feelings, i dont like. When i ask about somebodies feelings im opening my damn heart to you, and i expect to get the truth back. I find it unfair how someone can step into my life, hurt me, then dump me like yesterday's garbage just like that. But i suppose that is the way life is. And simply put that is all i really have to say. Hopefully my next update will be far more cheerful.

Music - Halo by Oleander

~*Tomorrow's Light*~
December 28, 2003
Mood - Tired
Well, its very early in the morning and i dont think i could go to sleep if i tried, cuz my parents have company upstairs...nyea! i dont like it. im tired and misserable and i want to go to bed. But i guess it wont hurt to stay up a little longer. *sigh* i hate having to update after having so much happen after so many days...i just wont and if u really wanna kno, u can just ask. Neways, i feel sluggish lately. Stupid lots of food, lol. i haven't been able to work out since i sprained my ankle and u kno christmas and all the food. So its not good. Neways, i need to do laundry badly. I got a huge pile building up and lookin at it aint gonna help it any....yepp. Tomorrow i think im goin to do laundry, work out and practice the sword all day. Hopefully that'll take care of both of those problems, but probably not. However my ankle's still sprained so i have to skip a whole step in my training. *pouts* w/e. sall good. hmmm...sooooo...yea. I am so bored, i guess ill make an attempt at sleep. Cyaz all!

Music - One Man Army by Our Lady Peace

~*I'm Going to Eat You*~
December 19, 2003
Mood - Tired
Well, its 11 o' clock and i just got home from Klaiber's. I like it when i have these days when i can just sit back and say "Today was a good day" then pretty much fall to sleep and hope to god tomorrow will be as great. I dont know about that, I'm going to Alya's at 1...but then i gotta be gone by 3:30 nyea, kobe'll be there so ill just see if he wants to go walking or sumthing. *nods* thatll be good. NEWAYS! Today...hmmm, lets see. After school which got out at 11:45...sweeeeeeeeet! me and Koby walked to his moms work...where we then got a ride to the mall from Koby's mommy and we walked around a bit and Koby got a penquin pillow for someone as his present for the secret santa tonight. Me on the other hand had to look for a present for my pop....*psst* dont tell him...but itza package of golf balls! lol, i just looked for the cheapest pack i could find ^.^ ya, ima kind and caring son. ^.^ lol, neways...at the mall we met up with Dan and Riley and i got a free crisp taco! YUMM ^.^ then after we got our presents we all headered back on over to Dan's house where we sat around and played halo for a bit! YAY GOOD STUFF! we played capture the flag and me and koby won, we're good! dan changed the rules around a bit and it made it much harder...somehow:S...probably if we would've gotten teh warthogs again it would've been easier. but it was great cuz killing isn't so important...its just a helpful addition. But yep, twas fun. After the game tho koby had to leave so then me and dan was stuck wit riley. eck! riley eventually went home and then dan called Klaiber, and Klaiber said i could go to his house tonight! WEEEE fun stuff. so thaz where i was all day, we all chipped in like 4 dollars and bought pizza and it was...can u say "yumm yumm"? lol, good times. Then we watched...uhm...chill out? uhh i dont kno the movie name but it was about snowboarding...yepp...it was good. but then eventually we all went home and as i neared the end of his cresent i remembered i forgot my present for my dad so i had to quickly hurry back up and grab it then continue my trip back home...nyea! so stupid... -.- lol, but itz all good. Neways, i should probably be off to bed now. Cyaz all lata!

Music - Breakfast at Tiffany's

~*Time to Dance*~
December 16, 2003
Mood - Disgusted
I have been in the most skitty of moods of late. I hate it. I got writer's block and my writing absolutely sounds like skit! I tried practicing the sword and that went horribly awry, i can't even play soccer cuz of my ankle. BAMMIT! Cant i do anything right? Its pathetic. Ange went out bowling when i thought she was coming to my soccer game yesterday with me, nyea...its funny how plans with her always seem to change. I looked over my calender and in the 7 months i went out with Lamann, Angela has already caught up in unenclosed circles. Its quite sad, or at least for me, Ange doesn't seem to care. YAY! Tomorrow is early wednesday! YES ^.^ which means i get out at noon which is totally awesome. I still have no plans, i probably wont develop any either...i have no life. *cries* hmm, ill ask ross if he wants to do something...sounds like a plan. neways, thaz the excitement in my life recently. Tomorrow is early dismissal, thursday everybody is gone for the ski trip and friday is early dismissal as well! YAY!!! SCHOOLS ALMOST OVER! then i just gotta make it through the weekend...and its monday, the day of part 1: Lord of the Rings. Its at my house, so itll be great fun! Then the 23rd is Part 2: Lord of the Rings. And we go to Return of the King, yay! fun times! then later on, is christmas carroling! YAY!!! itll be absolutely amazing! ^.^ then is christmas eve. i wont care as long as i aint spending the night alone again like last year...and then christmas! WHOOT! i cant believe its actually so close. And then...the day after...Boxing Day, and me and Ange's two months. YAY! but neways..thaz my life for the next couple weeks...im bored. Cyaz all.

Music - It's All Been Done by Barenaked Ladies

~*Walking Through the Driving Rain*~
December 14, 2003
Mood - Strong
Well i figure its time to update...im making too much space between entries again! AHHH its scarry. I have homework i need to do, i think...oh well. itll get done somehow. lol, it always does. Hmm yes, so whats been new lately? Uhh...Angela came over yesterday and i couldn't get a hold of my dad to come home and give Ange a ride home so she had to leave an hour ahead of schedule. *sigh* oh well! Its all good, and today i went to a movie with her and kayla. It was...fun...lol. "Stuck on you" you kno, the movie bout the conjoined twins! ^.^ it was funny, not as funny as i thought it would be, but still funny. Then i walked home without endangering my ankle...it got pretty scarry at one point though. *cries* i couldn't see where i was walking! lol, oh well its all good! Anyways im at home now, just sitting around. I wrote some more of magic wars today, just some journal entries of Valere's father journey on his search for the gai'verden...or something god, i always forget that dragons name...*hits head* oh well! i just made it up awhile ago. lol but thaz fun, anyways im going to go cuz im absolutely bored out of my mind! cyaz all lata!

Music - Save Me by 40 Foot Echo

~*Sore*~
December 10, 2003
Mood - Cold
Why do they make crutches that hurt ur damn hands! *cries* yes, i stayed home again today...i went to use my crutches this morning and realised i wasn't goin to make it all day today like that, so mom let me stay home and rest...yay! so thaz wut i did, and all my homework blah! and i also dont like colds! rawr! they should just go away, but i dont think i missed much, there was the playin at herald school and design and math. in math we marked the cum review...i can just hand it in tomorrow. yepp...thaz my plan at any rate. But neways, my day was really boring...i just sat around all day i did alot of reading from Crossroads of Twilight tho...yay! im with Perrin now ^.^ and somebody threw a cup at Mat...lol, fun times. dont that sound exciting? neways...band concert tomorrow...and most likely a math test. bweh, but i must be off...i really have nothing to say. Cyaz all!

Music - Breakfast at Tiffany's

The Weight Stone
December 9, 2003
Mood - Still Sick -.-
Well yay! Im updating! Whoot! K uhm today i went to school, yesterday i didnt cuz i was sick and recently sprained my ankle, then i was all running around today exhausted by the damn crutches! i dont wanna go to school anymore *cries* oh well, guess i have to. at least i got a elevator key! YAY ^.^ today everbody was all like what did you do? i told everybody i sprained my ankle playing soccer...but i told curtis that i got hit by a car...then Kobe backed it up and said hes a bad driver. lol, it was great. KOBE GOT A HAIRCUT!!! YAY!!! he no longer has a mop-head! Yay! lol, he said his eyes felt funny cuz he could actually see, im like, HAHAHAHA thaz great...yepp...fun fun. neways thaz life currently. in design i designed a great house, it was hilarious...i had multilines around the outside (how u normally make walls and for some of the rooms on the inside) but for one wall it was just a normal line...and i had the swimming pool room, the bathroom, the kitchen (which is smaller than the bathroom) and the Kinky Bedroom. It was great. Then over to the side i wrote yea thaz right, my house has no doors and one of the walls is made of cardboard and old christmas cards! ...i dont like doin book 7. its too hard and i dont understand it. soooooo no. heheheeh ^.^ yepp yepp. uhmmm...i went to my soccer game today and ange was there! YAY! so i hung out with her for an hour, it was fun ^.^...but now, the weight stone. *shrugs* its all good. You kno wut? They should make some kind of apparatus that you can practice the sword with a sprained ankle, and with out havin a coughin fit when u have a cold. I wanted to run today at soccer but ange wouldnt let me. Then she was callin herself flubby...so i had to tickle her -.- there aint any flub on that girl, shes hot! i mean, truly! but yes...i must do be off. Cyaz all!

Music - Halo by Oleander (hey i love this song)

Flying Time
December 8, 2003
Mood - Sick
Yes, i need to update more 6 days??!?! thaz crazee...well neways, wut ive been up to lately...on thursday i had a soccer game, of course we lost...but ange was there, i was playin alright at the end of the second half so i didnt feel too stupid. Then there was friday, McCoy dance...it was boring. I was too tired to dance, and plus no one was talking to me, and when they did it was an insult...riiiiight...thnx. But, before that Dan, Kobe + Riley came over and we played LotR: Return of the King, amazing game!!! oo, i played it on thursday too, i was gimli ^.^ WHOOOT!!! Yup, it was fun...so we played that for a really long time then Dan + Riley left and Kobe stayed and we ordered pizza, then kobe left later to go to justins and i eventually headed off to the McCoy dance. Then came saturday, i went over to Kayla's house and me, Ange, and Kayla were the only ones there, ross, kobe, and alya all didn't come. But ross eventually came over later and we left at midnight. We watched house of a 1000 corpses...i dont like that movie, very very disturbing. ECK! Kayla liked it...*shivers* lol, uhm yes...then sunday was the absolute pits. I had one thing to look forward to, but nyea...its all right, at the beginnin i had soccer and i went out for maybe like 5-10 minutes and i already sprained my ankle really bad, so i went to the hospital for the rest of the day or till 4 at least and told me it was just a sprain...eck! thaz where i started developing my cold too, *cries* neways i wanted it to be broken, cuz then i coulda gotten a neon orange cast or something! Thad be cool ^.^ yeppers and for sunday i HAD asked Ange to come over, but she didnt cuz she had homework. That upset me and i called her askin why we're goin out. She actually sounded upset when i asked her and i felt bad. I found out shes only been in one other relationship before me, and i remember that relationship, it wasnt very long so yes, its kind of refershing to kno that maybe some of this is just cuz she hasn't been in any relationships before, i haven't been in much more...only 1 actually, but its still reashuring. When it was about 3 i called her, but she was on the phone wit Kayla so she had to call me back, she did a couple minutes later and we talked for wut must have been two hours till her sis got grumpy and kicked her off...bleh! neways we talked about me snowboardin, im like...yes it would be fun cuz id get to see u more often, but id kill myself if i tried to snowboard, id feel bad cuz id be ruining everbody elses time by goin so slow, and finally...im a lil short on cash. but nyea, its all good...maybe someday, depends how long we're together...yepp, she told me about a dream of kaylas today and said she thought it was funny. Basically what happened in it, was me and ross changed g/fs im like. "WHAT?!? you think thaz funny?" i didnt actually say that, but id be pissed if somebody tried to take her away from me, and very upset. and she thinks its funny? *questioning look* i can see why i doubt her love sometimes...even tho i probably shouldn't. and yes, that has been my life the last couple days. But its all good, but neways i do be off, cyaz all! *waves*

Music - Halo by Oleander (All must worship the goodness of the song!)

~*Wind*~
December 2, 2003
Mood - Calm
Just got back from the Dentist...whoooot....no, not really but eh! I thought maybe Ange would've come on-line SOMETIME today...but apparently not for still no e-mail. *shrugs* at the dentist i had LOTS of time to think, especially with the peoples talkin bout wut they wuz. i came to conclusions, but they dont really matter a whole lot. Cuz well....forget it if ya wanna kno ask and i MIGHT tell you. Depends who ya are...uhm, i realised how brainless i was back in jr. high school. *shakes head* ur funny kyle! lol, LOOKING!!! ahahahaha....tu es regarde....DROLE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA...yes, i kno im good. lol. fun fun, hmmm...neways today...science was boring, same with language, we started some questions on poems and stuff...we did war. and ashleigh thought it was funny that it was so gruesome. riiiiiight...cuz u kno...war is pretty. lol! tis pretty ^.^ yay! no uhm...i have no clue where that came from! weeee! ok, then off to lunch and i didnt do anything really...then was design, and i finished up book 5. it was REALLY easy...go fig. and then math class was...mathish again. i came home and sat around waiting for some kind of reply from Angela, but never got one...went to the dentist and came home and still no reply. *shrugs* tis all good i guess. but im off, cyaz all!

Music - Halo by Oleander

~*Back and Gone Again*~
December 1, 2003
Mood - Confused
Well i found out what i was waiting for. *blinkx* go fig. Lamann wasn't gone her comp was just bein screwy so yes...she came back and talked to me, we decided to give it a shot, but when i asked should i re-add her i guess it got to her and she said no forget about it and poof....gone again. Neways yes, quite interesting. "A friend is a terrible thing to waste" Lamann WAS a friend, a good one at that, until we neared the end. It would have been nice to see if we could've pulled what differences we had aside and start new, but that oppurtunity has just flewn out the window. I hope that one day i wont regret this. It FEELS big, like something just big happened...bigger than break-ups or fights...big...but yes, now that that is said and done i really have nothing else to talk about except some things that i forgot to add to my last post, on my way home we was talking and at first i thought dana was talkin bout a card trick but apparently i had did it and i laughed. Im like "I DID THAT?! THAZ ACTUALLY FUNNY!" or at least...so i thought. lol, but i think i kinda remember the occasion now...i think i was with Jenna and she was letting Dana have a eraser or something...and i had 2...so i was like "ok, pick one, A or B" then she said "that one" and i was all in a angry voice and stuff and was like "A OR B!!" lol, i laughed...twas good, then getting on the bus, kobe did an impression of me and i did an impression of him doing an impression of me and i felt good that i hit it dead on, then i was like wait...the total impression is based on me....CRAP! lol, was a good time, but i suppose i should be off now...ive said all thaz been needed to say, cyaz all!

Music - Hurt by Johnny Cash

~*Waiting*~
December 1, 2003
Mood - Feelin' Good
Well today was a good day ^.^ BAND WAS AMAZING! We just got to go do our own thing...the bad thing was, people tried to take charge and nobody respects somebody who just takes charge...bleh so they're rude about it. w/e it still was fun! we opened up the class by a couple of us playin rhytm of the winds then more and more of us joined in ^.^ it was great! then we were doin sections thingers...and groups would practice with mr. rappaport, so while u weren't practicing you got to go in the back room and play w/e u want. we played rythmm of the winds alot ^.^ i lovers that piece! whooot! so band class put me on a high for the rest of the day...alicia laughed at my hair in math class and it concerned me cuz i couldnt see it. but oh well. then we had a quiz im actually worried about. i did LOTS wrong, but i double checked it so i should be fairly ok. Then i got home and Lamann talked to me...she asked if we could have decent convs yet. I said im still pissed bout that rumour but shur...she didn't answer so w/e. i honestly dont care. I might be goin to sock wars tonight! thatd be sweet! ^.^ u run around and hit people with socks! my kinda game, lol. me and kobe r goin to be on the same team and just keep hittin each other...and u guessed it, ur supposed to hit people on the other team! *laughs* lol...yepp...fun fun. but thaz bout it so im sitting here bored now. waiting...*nods* waiting is good...for what i dont know...but it describes this all too well. Oh wellers! Guess im gonna go practice the sword a bit cyaz all!

Music - Are you there by Oleander (i mean seriously!)

~*Back Again*~
November 30, 2003
Mood - Hurt
Well...im not feeling the greatest right now. I thought ange would come over after she was done snowboardin today...but nope...guess i aint important enough. *shrugs* oh well. At least she did call...at 5:30. She called and she told me she aint comin ova cuz she was too hurtin and tired. Yepp...neways that was the majority of my day. I didnt do skit...i hate it when I waste my days like this *shakes head sadly* well w/e...i guess maybe i shouldnt whine eh? im out then

Music - 3am

~*A Toothless Viper*~
November 29, 2003
Im hungry!!! *cries* i haven't eaten anything all day and my stomach is starting to get a bit angry...lol. oh well, ill just wait till we eventually have supper *shrugs* But time to get things up to date. I honestly can't believe its been only 3 days after our one month...it feels like its been longer. *shrugs* i saw her again today, i wasn't going to at first but then i found out Koby was invited so im like...yay! Koby! The mall aint so boring when you got somebody crazee like you ^.^ i asked Koby if he wants to go walking tonight...but his sword is still broken, bleh! oh well, i guess ill just manage another night alone...finish up my homework and get ready for boredom tomorrow! YES! lol, yepp...thaz the plan. Neways yesterday i went to ange's it was amazing. I lovers her ^.^ however...something is tugging at me...again -.- i dont like this feeling. *shrugs* I'm a bit curious tho...she brought up the dance thaz coming up, yesterday...but she didnt ask me to go with her till today. and only when alya brought it up. Im a bit...concerned wether she wants to go or not...or go and just hang out with her friends...well hopefully she'll read this and can answer it for me right? ^.^ so yes...im bored now. I got slide cream!! WHOOT! so yes...now my slide will be slippidy smoooooooooooth ^.^ im so happy ^.^ lol. I think i kno why i feel...kinda not good right now. i think itz cuz ange was all sickish when she left today and i wish i could make it better....*sniff* oh wellers! i should be off...hopin supper will be soon *crosses fingers* lol, cyaz all lata!

Music - One Many Army by Our Lady Peace

~*One Month*~
November 26, 2003
Mood - Drained, yet happy
Yes, today has been exactly one month since i first asked Angela out! I hope there are many more like this. ^.^ ive already seen her a bit today, but i get to see her even more at soccer tonight! YAY!!...im goin to wish her the happy anniversary then ^.^ uhh...well neways lets start at the beginning! It started off in science where we honestly didnt learn much...we worked with Microscopes...oooooo sooooooooo differnt. lol, yea...language we had to finish our notes but some of them were really hard! *cries* i hate language -.- then was lunch and we went off to get our yearbooks! YAY!!! they finally came in, and i got lots people to sign it! WHOOOT! then went off to design where i actually did some work *gasps* lol, ive gotten lazy lately...heeeheee...uhm yes. so then it was math class and guess wut?!?! Mr. Hider wasn't there! We had Mrs. Gagley and it was great! lol, we did the notes in like 5 minutes and then had over an hour to do our homework. i finished easily then when alicia finished i came and sat with her and looked through her yearbook! i got laurissa and andrea to sign my yearbook too! and i was the first to sign laurissa's! IM LIKE *gasps* WHAT AN HONOUR!!!! lol...yea i kno ima loser, but it was fun. lol... uhm then i came home and immediatly went off to the mall where i met Angela! We went into Cole's bookstore and i purchased crossroads of twilight! YAY! im finally caught up ^.^ so yes...then i came back home after ange's mom picked her up and to my surprise my parents weren't home...no note no nothing...so im curious as to where they are...*shrugs* oh wellers! tis all good! i suppose im going to be off tho, need to make meself some supper if i want to do good in soccer tonight! Ill cyaz all lata!

Music - Hate Every Beautiful Day by Sugarcult

P.S. MY HANDS SMELL LIKE ANGE!! mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.........

~*You Haven't Seen Nothing Yet*~
November 24, 2003
Mood - Loved
I've decided to update! YAY!!!...uhm yes, aint that grand? lol. Neways ive been daydreaming again and maybe its just cuz its winter but ive had the same grand ol image of me and Morc racing down a mountainside on hoverboards while we duke it out with swords and his plasma cannon. I want to write it, but where and when *shrugs* i realised that more or less, Morc is my rival in the story...is that supposed to say something bout who i am? Is my rival...me? Kinda strange when you think about it...but it makes sense *shrugs* neways i like it. The moves Cliff does at least, flips off a ramp Morc pushes him onto. Then morc blastes plasma shots up at Cliff and cliff while spinning and flipping in a really cool trick through the air deflects everyone and comes down his sword right upon Morc's again. *squirms* i would so LOVE to make a movie out of Magic Wars ^.^ lol, uhm yes...ok! enough daydreaming! today was quite exciting actually...in science i became Harry Potter...wow just like last year ^.^ lol. TA was boring and Language we got new books...at lunch tho! Koby told me to write a paragraph for his social essay and it went something like this...

This paragraph is about Legal Rights. Legal rights are a good thing, otherwise we'd have legal wrongs. "The old mans rights of life, freedom and health were not being fufilled," said the oldman who couldn't speak cuz i pulled. His tongue out and violated his rights of life, freedom, safety, liberty for all, and compliments. Complimentary peanuts on airplanes are a good thing because they show just how wrong the saying "Nothing is Free" is. Social next semester is going to be very annoying. I dont like work...The End.

Then i did another paragraph...they was all pretty good, when i read them aloud everybody was laughing really hard. Then bein harry potter again i was trying to turn koby into a sesame bun with the spell alicia deciphered for me. *wink* lol. twas fun. Design was pretty good, i designed a pretty nice lookin couch. I liked it at least, its supposed to be worth 25% so i hope i did good. Math was boring and when i came home i went straight to work on finishing up my desk and bookcase i was drawing. It actually turned out really, really good! i just have to shade it now and itll be really good ^.^ im usin the way Brian tought me and it looks alot better too! yay! then i came on-line and talked to Ange ^.^ and she eventually took off and i studied with alicia for a bit till she had to go too...at the same time as Alya...grawr! i want somebody to talk to! Alya had a LOTR marathon on the weekend and didn't invite me! made me cry...*sniff* but she said it was at a friends...she said she told her that i love LOTR and i practice the sword and then she said she was going to marry me. im like "riiiiiiight im ange's. see look! ive even been branded!" *raises sleeve to reveal really sloppy writing in pen reading "Property of Angela Vick" YAY ^.^. lol, but yes...the prospect that someone is impressed by the sword is intriquing...not many other people have shown much interest in it. But yes...that is life currently and i think i shall be off to do more homework...*sigh* at least i got my science notes done...stupid language notes *sniff*...oh well...cyaz all! BYE!!!!

Music - If I Told You This Was Killing Me, Would You Stop by ...oh bammit! it dont say...*cries*...*shrugs* kobe downloaded it. lol

~*Seemless Glass*~
November 22, 2003
Mood - Calm
More or less i feel like im floating among the smoothest of waters. A crystal glass surface, just me and the water. However i kno deep down in my mind the slightest twitch and i sink, but for that moment do you truly care? It feels as if you are flying above and beyond the limits we have. Do you even care what is around you? You sink into that ocean of peace and feel an ultimate calm within you. But back in the deepest part of your heart, ur scared of that enivatble itch that will cause you to sink to the deepest earning of despair. You know it will happen, and are scared beyond natural belief. But for that one moment...you truly are at rest.

Yes, that whole thing is on my current mood...aint that great ^.^ neways...just like to say one thing...alicia, ur great. i dont understand how you can always somehow manage to make me smile. and another special thanks...angela, i love you deeply and you are what makes my world spin, im giving you my heart...please dont let me down. Koby, ur the greatest pal in the world, in all honesty it would be very difficult to find someone who could even come close to how great you truly are. I hope you kno that. Ross, uve always been a good friend...a bit of a critic about me and my lifestyle at times, but its always good. plus you give me cookies! Dan, we've been friends since gr 3 and i can still remember the days we'd spend on the soccer pitch by ourselves cuz we didnt like the intermerals. also the times we would pick on my stupid cousin just cuz...well he's stupid. good times and i kno, there is shur to be many more....and in all honesty those are the people i have to say things to...it all started with alicia (cuz of the entry on the tagboard..made me laugh, lol) and then it just escalated. There are more people who have always been there for me, put up with far more than they have needed to but stuck beside me why? I really have no clue, i guess i mean that much to them...especially Kobe. Best Friends Forever Kobe, Always. so yes, im done my thank yous to the special people in my life, there are WAY more...i just really dont want to name them all, lol. neways today i went to ross's house was fun, kayla called and ross told em we were goin to the mall tonight so they phoned back and asked if they could come along...which i certainly didn't mind at all after havin Ange almost ripped from my schedule the day before. We went to Medicine Hat Buffet for supper and i didnt eat much...i have no clue why. then we ran off the mall where we met lots of people...i was having fun, but *shrugs* i guess you just need to be me to understand. we went back to Ross's place and i held ange tight...i said it was to keep me warm...i was lying *blush* when we got there we played pool...fun fun! it was ok at the start, but the final one...i just lost it, i couldn't make a shot if my life depeneded on it. it was horrible, then just after kayla lost i sunk both of our last balls and then slammed the cue ball into a pocket...lol, i had to see if i could do it, lol...so yes, that was pretty much my day...Ange did go to shoot on the pool table with the granny stick and hit the ball with the granny stick instead of the pool cue and it twas very funny, lol. then Kayla's mom arrived and i got a ride home from her. I came downstairs, started up the comp and hoped that Angela might come on-line sometime, i guess not so i might as well go to bed. Tomorrow however, i need plans...i dont feel like sitting around at home, if ANYBODY is interested leave a message on my tagboard or e-mail me or ANYTHING! i mean seriously...lol. neways, that was my day....ooo i dont suppose i mentioned my trying to fly yet have i??? stopped outside of shoppers drug mart, i grabbed some "flyers" from the rack thinger put one in each hand and jumped around flapping the pieces of paper attempting to fly, needless to say the attempt failed. *shrugs* oh well ^.^ but i guess im off to bed, i dont see why Ange would come on-line NOW...but, eh...wut u gonna do? but i must be off, i have soccer tomorrow and i dont feel like running around with cramps in my sides. owie...cyaz all!

Music - Graduation by Vitamin C

~*Sinking Sand*~
November 22, 2003
Mood - Depressed
Well, its 8:40 saturday morning and I can tell already today is going to be skit. I guess ill see if Ross and Kobe want to go walk to the mall or something, i dont kno. It's getting cold out. *cries* THERES NOTHING TO DO! *pouts* ill just probably spend the whole day drawing furniture. yay! -.- well, w/e. tis all good. Yesterday i thought id get to see Angela for a good deal of time. Nope, i thought i had to be out by 6:00 and i ended up leavin at 5:00 cuz Angela went over to Kayla's to sleep over. I'm not quite sure but somehow i feel ditched. *shrugs* we didn't do much, sat around watched TV and played videogames... whooot. Koby came over later and we hung out and played Mario Tennis. My house is so boring, there is literally nothing to do here. i hate it -.- We watched Harry Potter tho, lol. Now im just kinda sitting here. I was going to see Brother Bear on sunday, but Alya said no movie this weekend, so bleh. A complete waste of a weekend! YAY!!! but yes, i must be off...talk to ya all lata.

Music - I'm Just A Kid by Simple Plan (ironic to how well it fits:S)

~*Gaining Wings*~
November 21, 2003
Mood - Great
Not much has really happened between the last entry and now, it is the mornin of the 21st. I dont kno if ill have time to update later. *shrugs* ill be have too much fun if ya kno wut i mean *nudge nudge wink wink* yessers, it shur does sound good. So yeppers, i finished the drawing of the TV...did i mention that last time? oh well, i finished it and it actually looks good! im proud ^.^ yay! lol. yes...then i showed alicia and she was like "is there anything you can't do?" im like weeeee!!!!!!!!! ^.^ COMPLIMENT!!! lol. twas good. so...now im sitting here waiting for 8:00 to come so i can go get ready for the bus and header off to school. i had a really wierd dream that i missed the bus for the stupidest reasons. Yes, even in my dreams i have no life. lol, leave me alone. duuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....i feel like drawing something again, lol. oh well, i guess i should be off to find something to do. Cyaz all!

Music - The Closest Thing by The Juliana Theory

~*Lost In A Sea Of Stars*~
November 20, 2003
Mood - Lost
Well, its updating time!!! Why i have no clue...i really dont think anybody read this anymore but w/e, im still gonna write! you kno why?!!...dont ask cuz i dont even kno. OK ^.^ onto today, hmm...all started with a long boring wait for the bus...got there at 8:40...that was the new/old time, grawr! bus times are far to confusing now. uhh got to school and i quickly finished up my diarama and mr mcfarlane looked at it, i was quite proud of the lack of effort put into it. im going to get a horrible mark *sigh* w/e, thaz life i suppose. i actually did put effort into it, it just all looks really shoddy. then was TA and again i thought of how unnessescary TA has become and we should just get rid of it. Seriously, id rather run off to English or Band right after science. I kno, im confusing. But neways, eventually we went off to english and i handed in my diarama then typed up my letter and handed it in, twas easy. After that was all done it was lunch and i worked on my cum review. I suppose i didnt have to cuz some idiot marked mine that marked everything right. Well w/e, normally you would think id be happy, but *shrugs* just seems so unfair to alicia who had all the same answers as me. neways then it was design and i drew a chair, it was pretty...ugly. HAHAHAHA, ya i kno im funny. ^.^ lol, then i went off to math class where we marked our cum reviews and then sat there for maybe 15 mins. Twas boring -.- then got on the bus came home, and i realised that the only day left was friday and then right after school i was heading off to see Angela and it was good. It's getting closer but i got nothing to do. I dont get enough homework -.- god i need a life. *shrugs* i finished up my chapter questions already and everything, maybe i should start studying for my final exams....bweh. yes, ive annoyed myself by the extent of how much i do not have a life. hmmmm...well tomorrow im doing something, then ill probably sit around the next day, and the next..o wait, one of those days im going to brother bear, and on sunday i have soccer. eh, tis all good. Yes, so neways im done with my complainin for today. So im off, cyaz all!

Music - One Last Breath by Creed

~*Time to Fly*~
November 19, 2003
Mood - Happy
Well its the morning of the 19th, i truly do not know what ill do today. I just know i have a band rehersal that i have to go to, i think theres free pizza and pop though, so its all good. ^.^ after im getting a ride home with Kobe's pop. So that'll be fun. Oh yea, and in febuary sometime im supposed to be goin to the Nickelback concert with Koby and his Dad. I learned that yesterday, i think'll be fun. HAH! that reminds me of something somebody once said..."I want my nickel back"...oh right! that was ross who gave mike a nickel to shut up for an hour...lol, good times. Neways yesterday was the Career Fair. I liked it, i did get to spend the whole morning with Ange, so twas good. When it said McCoy buses were there i followed her to the main foyer and gave her a hug and said goodbye. *sniff*...im going to miss her. lol, i get to see her on friday though so yay! ^.^ hmm...i didnt learn much bout archetecture before, somehow i thought that it only took 4 years university. apparently i takes a whole 6 years of post secondary education -.- but three of those years are spent apprentacing with a regular archetect. yep yep. neways, thats the idea of it all. I also picked up a article about creative writing...bleh, twas all about telemarketing. neways that was my day yesterday and as for today...hmmm...well, i got nothing! lol its early wednesday but i have to stay after school for the band rehersal, poop eh? thank god for fridays i mean...the one day u get out early and u have to stay because of a band rehersal. and i mean you HAVE to, u need a written note to get out of it, tis gay. but w/e, id be there even if u didnt need the note, however...they said this might be the last time to get pizza...u kno, i mooch! it would be much harder to get food intake that way -.- but w/e, tis all good. i should be off tho. cyaz all!

Music - The Stand by Jack Union

~*Falling For Her*~
November 17, 2003
Mood - Natural High
i had to stick natural in there or u might all think i was on crack or sumthin, even tho u probably do neway *shrugs* YAY! neways u all kno wut happened saturday but sunday? noooooo! wut did i do sunday? well i sat around till approximately 3:00 when i began to make my way to the water park. There i met up with Ange and we walked back to her house. We watched 8 crazy night, yes i watched it again and then we went and watched TV upstairs till her lil bro got home...hes annoying its specialistic. He even hit me on the head with a rubber chicken and thought it was comedy...im like...not many people laugh at you do they? neways yes, i ended up helping angela with her science homework which ive already learned, it was the chem chapter and she didnt' even learn some of the stuff yet, but it was all easy. So what if i didnt show her how to get the answer for finding molar masses. lol, oh well its all good. she'll learn eventually...and yes, i was quite proud. there was not an answer i needed to look in the book for. Sometimes i forgot how to word something, but i still knew what it was. So yes, we watched Space Jam too ^.^ then i headed off for home about 9:00 twas a good walk home. lol..and im scared of dark alleys....*blush* im not a loser! lol. uhhhh yes, so that was my day, i spent most of it with ange in my arms so it was great ^.^ i lovers her! Shes amazing...and yes shes the reason im on this high ^.^ its great! its a shame i dont think i get to talk to her much at all today. *sigh* well wutcha gonna do? Hmm? nothing thaz wut...lol! neways i guess i should be off...its 7:41 already??? wow...the bus is coming early again so i guess maybe i should put a shirt on or something. lol, cyaz all!

Music - Stacy's Mom - Fountains of Wayne

~*Memories*~
November 16, 2003
Mood - Bored
Well, its early in the morning again, and i got nothing to do so im going to update about yesterday! YAY!!! neways, currently i have a situation on my hands, i asked Angela if she wanted to do something today, and Kobe says he needs my science book so we have to do something. *shrugs* neways...i have to wait till ange comes online to figure it out. So yes, onto yesterday...and the day before. Ok, friday was pretty boring...sat around and did homework. But i came out of my house looked behind me and there was the bus! So i ran all 3 blocks to my bus stop and the bus never passed me, yes...i was proud ^.^ lol. Other than that tho i didn't do skit...did lots homework. Now saturday, i sat around writing a rough copy of my english letter until maybe 12:00 then i got a ride from my parents up to blockbuster and i rented Robin Hood-Men in Tights. GOOD MOVIE ^.^ and Eight Crazy Nights. If you ask me Eight Crazy Nights wasn't that strong of a movie, they ended it way to soon. They needed more content. Yep, thaz wut i think neways...but yes. I then walked from Blockbuster to Kobes house and got there at like exactly 1. Ross was the next one there, and then Dan, Riley, and Mike all showed up. Then the last one to arrive was Ange. She had apparently been there already and even phoned but we didn't answer the door or phone. We heard the phone ring, but we didnt remember the door. We didn't kno who was calling tho. But next time ill remember...548 something...lol ^.^ itll help. so yes, we were playing pool and was a good time. I was actually doing good. I had to play with mike -.- and i sunk EVERY ball on our side. Twas doing really good, i wonder if Ange was impressed. Dan's like hes just showing off. And then im thinkin, if i could show off in pool i would be very happy im just trying very hard and getting very lucky ^.^ so yay! then after we quit that i believe i tried to teach people krud, but ange wouldn't play and neither would ross...ur all poopy! lol, well not ange ^.^ lol. ok, yes...ahem. so me and riley played krud by ourselves...good times. then we went tobogganing and Ange got cold so i hugged her the whole time trying to keep her warm. Ross, me and Ange didn't bring tobogganing stuff...kobe should've been more clear that we WERE going tobogganing when he told me he seemed unshur. so yes, we went back after ross was like at the path already. and we eventually made it home to where nice warm homemade pizza was waiting for us. Ange wouldn't eat tho...*sniff* ill still nva forgive you for making me eat that piece of pizza! *cries* lol, ok im good...yes, i ate lots of pizza ^.^ whoooooot! then we went downstairs and played more krud and i realised Ange was still cold so i put lots of pillows and snowpants and stuff on her. I felt bad cuz i couldn't be there to keep her warm...but yes, i do believe i lost in krud *shrugs* twas all good. then they started playin X-box and they got me to play and then i quit and it was good...then i played again and i won the game ^.^ lol, yay! i got 1 kill. then we put in a movie and pulled out cranium. Good game, Ange kept shouting at Mike ^.^ i lovers her! but yea, we lost...*sniff* poor us. lol, Ange me and Dan were on a team and Mike, Koby, and Ross were on the other team. Twas fun. OH YES! At that time, we were kinda on and off watchin Robin Hood-Men in Tights. Blinkin is amazing! Attackin that wooden pole. YAY ^.^ lol. So yes, after that game was over i had to put it away cuz i was the one who got it out pfffff...lol. but yes, then i laid down in ange's lap and cuddled up to her. then her mom came and we hung out some more, watched 8 crazy nights then made up a game on the pool table, was a fun time till mike joined i mean honestly, u could've hurt some god damn fingers the way he was playing...so i threw a ball right at his hand ^.^ whooot! lol. im like, u didn't throw ur ball i was aimin at the ball *angelishishness* lol yepps...that game was actually quite fun, then I played Halo with Kobe cuz Dan and Mike hadta go and we were shooting at each other and everything, then i eventually left and went home at like 11:30. Twas a good time. And yes, ive pretty much said everything thats happened up to this point now. I just hope Ange comes on-line soon so i can get my day underway. But im off now, ill cyaz all lata!

Music - Behind Blue Eyes by The Who

~*Facing Twilight*~
November 13, 2003
Mood - Tired
Well...im ready for bed, but i decided to update just cause of the things that happened today. neways in science i got to see felix for the last time, hes goin back to germany...ima gonna miss the poor guy. But yea, he wasn't doing work all class, twas great ^.^ gotta love him. Then in Band Class we had Mr. Wahl (sp?) as a sub...hes an AMAZING band teacher. lol, twas a great class...even tho AGAIN i did nothing -.- rawr! i hate a red balloon. too boring. at any rate we then went off to design, which i considered fun cuz for once i was learning. So i was doing work and crap and then i went off to math. Math was great, all we did was learn all day which meant no homework? and u kno wut? i got the day off ^.^ Mr. Hider told me to take a break, he wanted to give the other students a chance to answer questions...he told Dustin to take a break too...but i think thaz just cuz Dustin kept TRYING to answer questions, then Mr. Hider would have to say wuts wrong with it and what the right answer was blah blah blah...so i worked on my cum review all class. Was a great time. Then i came home and sat around till 8:15 when i took off to soccer in that time i decided to go have people over....at kobe's on saturday ^.^ lol, yepps, itll be great....OH NO! Blister...why? jeebus...*cries* i dont want blisters....poopy. neways its my last game for awhile, so no big deal...yes...the game. Before i went i picked up Ange, of course my day didn't really start till we got her ^.^ *sigh*...shes great. Neways...we picked her up and her sis had just finished fixing her nail so im like yay! and she came out and we were off to the fieldhouse where i passed the ball with ange till the game started. During that time a little kid came up to us and said her friend liked Ange. I probably should've stated my claim right there...why i didn't i have no clue. I just sat there like i usually do twidling my thumbs. GRAWR! but yes, that was that...i gave ange my coat so that she could hold onto it till the game was over. Apparently some lil kid sat on it -.- thaz great. At any rate twas a good game, i played like crap...again...but w/e. Then afta the game i got my stuff together and headed out with ange, we dropped her off and i came home to realise that my old messenger was STILL installed, i figured out how to uninstall it and now everything is just dandy. YAY ^.^ so yes, that was my day. Interesting no? Tomorrow i have nothing to do, i plan on doing my laundry then i think ill go out on the night, find something to do someplace. A friday spent at home...*cries* what have i become?!...my dearest friend....everyone i kno, goes away in the end...you could have it all! my empire of dirt, i will let you down, i will make you hurt...ahem, yes...i love that song ^.^ lol, but yes...im off to bed. Was hoping i mighta found Ange on, but guess not. Oh well, im off all cyaz!

Music - Further Again by Staggered Crossing

~*tis' fun*~
November 12, 2003
Mood - Bored
Wow! Alot shur has changed since i last wrong in here! I'm STILL BORED ^.^ WHOOOOT! lol, its great. So, wuts new since i last wrote in here? Time to talk all about...YESTERDAY!!!! why is it i always write about yesterday and never today? lol, i think its special...i dont care wut u think! POOPHEAD! *runs away laughin hysterically* ahem, yes...

All started off with me being bored, yay! so i decided i would finally draw that map for magic wars that ive been putting off...so i got everything ready and even started printin off Magic Wars. It all went fine till i found out mom had letterheads on the bottom of the pile of paper i put in the computer. so a couple pages were on cupe letterheads and i had to cancel the print, but the printer wasn't in the toolbar like usual...so that made me angry >.< lol, i just shut off the computer and went upstairs and called Kobe. Then i went over to his house after i finished gathering my stuff up. (I did get SOME map done, not much tho...) and then i walked over to kobes. i really need an insert for that boot...tis cold! so yes, i got there and kobe had the snow blower out....uhm yeay...i rang the doorbell and spock came to greet me...from behind....it was weird i come back out and the garage door is open, im like when'd that happen? so yes. after kobe was done we played pool. I won, cuz he scratched on the 8 ball ^.^ lol, im good at pool. yeppers, then we played halo. i suck, lol its special. we played it and there was only shotguns...i got 3 kills compared to everybody elses 40. :P twas great. then at 4:30 i headed back on home and ate supper and sat around till the dentist, then i headered on off to the dentist got my teeth cleaned and yes...i DO need to floss more *rolls eyes* dammit! flossing is so inconvienent! *cries* uhm yes, after that was over i came back home and Ange was on-line so i talked to her. My comp then screwed up, so did hers apparently and we both got booted. So i picked up a phone and gave her a call...we didn't stop talkin till bout 10:30 and what was great was there was always something to say ^.^ it was a nice talk, haven't had one of those in a long time. I would've kept talking but, i did have school tomorrow...and i dont like falling asleep in class, lol. yeppers so that was my day. It went from boring, to frusterating, to cold, to fun, to dentisty, to happy ^.^ my what an unordinary day! but yes, ill probably update tomorrow about what happened today! which, will be nothing. YAY! neways cyaz all!

Music - Dilemma by Nelly

~*Remember*~
November 11, 2003
Mood - Bored
I am bored. Still snowing out tho, its been snowing pretty hard since i woke up, i dont think there'll be another snow day, so bleh...it should stop, then i wont have to shovel. lol, no im not lazy *looks around innocently* well, finished my homework, it wasn't much...but hey..thats all ive done so far, i looked for some grid paper too, i was going to attempt to make a GOOD map, like the whole continent with countries and all the crap and stuff. But couldn't find graph paper so bleh. So, now im sitting here...my shirt has stuff all over it -.- GRAWR GO AWAY DUST!!!...and at 6 o' clock tonight i have a dentist appointment. I hate it there...harumph! yes, ima frog! HARUMPH! *hops about* OOOO!!! Yesterday! twas good, went ova to ange's at like 3 and hung out. We walked over to blockbuster and rented finding nemo. Ange fell on our way there, i felt bad cuz i didn't catch her. But i held onto her tight on the way back ^.^ lol. twas great. when we got back we chilled for a bit and waited for ross then we started finding nemo. twas a good movie. Then we had supper, noodles and hamburger stuff on top mmmmm.....twas good as well ^.^ lol. yea, then we finished watchin the movie and me and ross went home, then at 9:45 we met ange and kayla again at Mc D's. Kobe came too this time! We played a game. ^.^ first we all dissed ross cuz he was complaining to much...then we dissed me and kobe. it was great. Im like! Hey guys this is a great game! it's like turn on ur friends! YAY! lol, fun fun. then i found a shopping cart and i sat in it, then i found a hobos home!!! it was a shoe box! and im like! omg the hobo left his home! u kno wut that means? it means all the hobos in the world and gathering to have a secret meeting in which after they'll take over the world....kobe thought i meant i was going to put in on my head -.- lol. i eventually through it in a puddle. Yeppers, then we went back to ange's and chilled for a bit there, ross and kobe left at 11:00, i left an hour later. yepps, it was good. i learned the closet doors are not supposed to be open:P. lol, ^.^ its great. sooo yes, neways im off...to...sit here...bored...GRAWR!

Music - Daydreambeliever by The Monkees. -.-

~*Sickness of Love*~
November 9, 2003
Mood - Sick
Well, its the long weekend, and whole four days. And u kno wut? I have to catch a bloody cold!!! grawr!...ok, its not JUST a cold, i think i have the flu. Im all sweaty, yet i have the chills and when i try to move around i feel like emptying much my stomach and i get a MAJOR headache...*cries* i wanted to have fun this weekend! pshaw! well, w/e. ill have fun in the weekends to follow ^.^ lol. Yes, hmmm...i have a dentist appointment on tuesday. My mom was all...does he really? Its rememberance day. Why would they be working? I in all honesty dont care. Its just a check-up. Just so long as i can stand walking by Tuesday. So yes, seein as I'm sick im thinkin bout rentin some movies and just sittin there all day watchin em ^.^ that would be fun. lol, and yeaaaaaa......i wanna see Ange again, but grawr! *waves fist angrily* stupid cold. Well i suppose ill say everything thats happened lately. Ok, on friday. Not much happened, but i went to the McCoy dance and that was fun ^.^ LOTS AND LOTS. eeehehehehehe. lol, uhm yes but yea, i got tired and we went and sat on the thingers by the front. And yesterday i began to feel my first symptoms of the Flu. But i went to a movie anyways, i had the chills when i got there, but then during the movie i was close to Ange and i didnt feel cold anymore. Although i did feel really sweaty. lol...that sux. I saw Koby at the movie too. I dont kno wut he was going to see, but he was with Leslie *nudges Koby* lol. I also saw Laura, i thought she woulda hated me like so many of the other people do, but i guess not...she seemed nice. but yea, right now i want to take a shower so bad...but im afraid what if i like fall over or something? that would suck...i have soccer today, i dont think ill be going. neways, i suppose i should be off...attempt to have a shower or sumthin, i dont like this greasy feeling *cries* lol, cyaz all!

Music - Why I'm Here by Oleander

~*Writing of the Past*~
November 6, 2003
Mood - Subdued
Ok, pretty much i completely forgot i had written this and it was back on my xanga site...boy...thaz bad stuff back there...but yes. At any rate i found what i was looking for. The ending to Magic Wars. Or at least, the ending for now. It'll change, but it was good so i had to go get it before i eventually lost my xanga seein as i didn't save it anywhere else on my comp. So yes, thats right, im posting it on here now. Lol, then ill have to get it when i eventually make a new site. lol, but yes...here it is.

And so, life goes on. I suppose to most it must have seemed like the end. But to me, it was more like the beginning: the beginning of the rest of my life. But then, when you think about it, every beginning is because of some other end. The end of Pandora heeded Ironite and so on. And although this end seemed the most important it really depended on all the other ends that came before it; like a ladder with the rungs spaced too far apart. If you tried to skip a step you'd fall to the ground. And now that I look back at it, it was luck we stepped on all those rungs in the right order more than anything else. We had climbed that ladder blindfolded, guided by only our senses and a bit of help. And a bit of hinderence as i remember. I suppose at each end it would always work out though. And on that final end -that really only brings more rungs onto the ladder- everything finally seems at peace. Wether your peace comes from death or from victory it's all the same at the end. And so, our real lifes finally came.

Blaise and Alynin found a nice cozy house in Bothons City; well, thaz if you could count a 27 story, 1576 square foot house cozy. Blaise became head of the universal council, resolved all universal conflicts, and lead the magic worlds into the Golden Age. Alynin on the other hand was more like a stay at home wife. Well at least she stayed at home. She worked in the underground laboratory working on her experiments and coming up with some of the greatest inventions since the Delphinoid. Both Alynin and Blaise accepted their positions as leaders of the Chambers of Elements and along with Oshwin the Chamber of Elements brought a new sense of law and order to the Magic Worlds.

And then, theres us. I guess you could say that as the darkness faded so did a part of us. As fate had no more use for us, our magical heretage of being Great Ta'varen dwindled quite rapily. A month after the last battle my VH rate when down from 83 429.82 (the highest of the Great Ta'varen) to 5 832.1 Soriel's was almost gone completly. I don't know if that power will ever come back to us, if fate ever has need of us again i suppose it would. But we had done what we were meant to do and there will be no more adventures like that for us. It would be the generations after that would experience the new Great Ta'varens. Or would the great ta'varens ever come again? would the magic worlds finally be at rest after millions of generations of fighting the forces of darkness. Who knows? I personally don't think it will ever happen. But yes, our lifes...Me and Soriel moved to a small cottage up in the mountains where we decided to live out the rest of our lives. Although the bonds between us that were tied by us being Ta'varen were completely severed there were new bonds between us, love. We both have completely new lives now, we have 2 sons and one daughter all of which are very beautiful and will one day inherit the sword of stone and the mirror of courage. To my eldest son goes my first axe. The one of my father and my fathers amulet as well. If he can learn how to tame my fathers axe as well as i did then he shall inherit the sword of stone if not, then it goes to my youngest son, if he can learn to tame a weapon as well. The daughter, well she seems more beautiful everyday and her mother has already shown her the mirror or courage of which she'll be inheriting. You could tell she was meant to have it. It was a aura of rightness between them. And what adventures will life hold for them? Who knows? But it's a shame i wont be around to witness it with them. With the darkness every parish from our land completly? I think not...and that means there will be much more adventures to be hold for future generations. I know there will be new adventures to partake in as my sons and daughter get older, for i have felt it. With what used to my strongest assest i have felt it within them. My children are Ta'varen.

There we go, done. Now i dont have to worry bout losing it anytime soon ^.^ so yes im off again. Cyaz all!

Music - Fight for Your Honour by New Found Glory

~*To Feel a Grave*~
November 6, 2003
Mood - Skitty
GRAWR!!! ok, today has been very frustrating. I had 4! not 3! 4! tests today, one for every flipping subject and the first couple were easy...but then i started to go downhil. Design wasn't bad now that it doesn't count...whew thank god. I finished all 4 designs but apparently i did two in a layer that wont print, so i was screwed and i was gonna be late for math so i had to settle for printing off only two...-.- that sucked harshly. Then i go to math class take that test and i forgot how to do something! IVE NEVER FORGOTTEN HOW TO DO ANYTHING IN MATH BEFORE!!! GRAWR!!! im so mad at myself....poop. yes, thaz right...poop. lol, so yes, that was my day...test after test after test. *sigh* then i get home and i see someone left me a special surprise on my tagboard... ^.^ how thoughtful. ok look, i dont understand whyd ud even come to my site if you dont like me...it really doesnt make sense -.- but w/e, u have fun with that. You have ur opinions of me and i have my opinions of you. just u try to insult me on my own tagboard and it WILL get deleted, u insult me or any of my friends it will happen. I haven't really experienced problems with the later...seems people just like to hate me ^.^ well in all honesty, i dont give a damn. I kno who my friends are, when they start hating me that's when I'll start caring. so yes, now that thats out of the way...what do i have planned for today? kobe wants to go tobaggoning. that would be fun, ill probably go....if im asked neways. So yes, now im sitting here...hopin somebody would come on-line...*shrugs* neways...in Magic Wars im at the Fire Factory. So whooot! I'm actually catching up to where the story began last time ^.^ lol. its special. but yes.......i suppose im out now, cyaz all!

Music - Grow Up by Simple Plan

~*Consious Sleep*~
November 5, 2003
Mood - Tired
Tired......ugh...must...go to bed, but must update first...grawr! lol, soccer tired me out ^.^ *sigh* i got three whole fricken tests tomorrow...poopy! thaz wut i have to say about that...poopie! i hate rational expressions, they're so stupid...i screw up sooooo much!!! *cries* but yes, my day...have sat around, i saw ange today!!! IM SO HAPPY ^.^ lol. we didnt get to talk much tho cuz i was playin soccer. i did really good too! my first shot was only a bit to the left and lower and i woulda scored! *cries* it was so good too cuz kobe had a place kick passed it off to me and i blasted it at the net, almost scored, first shot of the game too...*sigh* then 2 more times that shift i ran up the field and set it up. its too much fun ^.^ so yea, im so happy cuz ange got to see me play real good ^.^ but in the second half i got tired. And meagan wanted to hurt me after the game cuz i made an attempt for the ball and tripped her and she scratched up her knee. well thaz wut u get for tryin to go around me ^.^ lol. yea...but yes, that was the only really good thing bout the game, i could tell we were all gettin tired near the end, our passes werent completing...but we still won! clays team is the only one we can beat, lol...its special, but yes...im off now. not much left to talk about, so yea...cyaz all lata

Music - Graduation by Vitamin C

~*Failing*~
November 4, 2003
Mood - Failure
Hey, its me again. whooot! lol, neways...*ahem* i SHOULD be doin my cum review but i am just a slight bit too lazy, sooooooo no. lol, instead im updatin ma blog. Neways today...lets start with Science...
Science - Quite boring for once, i sat around, but before class me and kobe went and renewed our novels. So yay! we have 20 cent fines! lol, but yes...TA
TA - We got our new ID cards...bout damn time...
English - Played a game! YAY FOR GAMES!
Lunch - Uhhh...sat around...again...lol
Design - Learned isometric views!!! WHOOOOT!
Math - Worked on Cum Review....WHOOOT!
then i sat around waiting for the bus and came home...sounds exciting eh? lol. not really...but eh w/e *shrugs* i talked to ange when i got home so yay! Oh and back to lunch...
Lunch (continued) - I found Lamann's ID in my wallet again so i threw it out along with my Gold Card. YAY FOR CLEANIN OUT WALLETS ^.^
so yes, that was more or less lunch...i also worked on my cum review which i thought alicia had pretty much done...but nooooooooo lol. neways onto other things, i feel like a failure. It seems like everybody expects me to be perfect, and i cant handle that amount of pressure. My report card coming up is going to be GREAT!!! but im afraid sometimes that may only add to the pressure. I probably deserve it, i do get cocky, lol...but why do people assume im perfect? I'm not! *shrugs* it annoys me...but thats really not that big of a deal. i liked how alicia worded it, in math 96% of the time im right, not 100%...96%! but yes, now onto another point...why do i feel like an idiot everytime after i talk to alicia? i talked to her last night bout me bein a philosopher and all that crap...and at the end when she had to go...i felt like i had made a fool of myself. She didn't do anything really to make me feel that way, maybe im just uncomfortable expressing this part of myself...but then why did i feel so at ease talking to danika about it? *shrugs* life is VERY confusing. neways i must be off so cyaz all lata *waves*

Music - Fall by Butterfinger

~*Beseaching Darkness*~
November 3, 2003
Mood - Calm
Hey, yes, twice in one day *gasps* unheard of! lol, no...not really, but yes. TODAY! ^.^, not much happened today, nothing that could make me truly escatic, didnt even talk to ange at all. *cries* oh well, ill live. hmm, what did i do today? After school i went over to Kobes and finished my language poem for halloween. It's great ^.^ lol. I'll type it all out just cuz im cool like that ^.^

Ode to Halloween
By Kyle Roberts
Here come the trick or treaters
During the darkness of the night
Vampires, Werewolves, Carebares
Oh my, what a fright!

Corpses of the gone
Lay littered about the floor
I shouldn't have eaten all the candy bars
Now I'll have to get more

My nerves are tightly wound
An eariness fills the air
All the creatures of the night
Come forth to give a scare

The doorbell rings once more
I look about the room
Theres nothing left to give him
So I'll sing a little tune

I see a brave adventurer
But his courage, it did fall
I guess that my singing
Is the scariest thing of all

Lol, aint it great! yea, so i did that, then we played XBOX over the internet or sumthin, but NOT Xbox live, it was fun...we got our butts kicked ^.^ and we did that till pretty much i had to go home, so that was my day! Exciting eh? lol, i didnt really do much at school....but yes, im off now. Cyaz all! (was this entry as short as it feels?)

Music - Rock-a-bye by Shawn Mullins

~*Creeping Sunlight*~
November 3, 2003
Mood - Isometric
I DONT CARE IF ISOMETRIC ISN'T A MOOD!!! LEAVE ME ALONE!!! *cries* ok, that was fun... Neways now onto what I've been up to for the last couple days. I DID go to Angela's on Halloween, normally i wouldn't have cuz all we did really was watch the drunk people, but bleh, they werent...that bad...one looked like he was going to beat me up ^.^ lol, it was special. Then one told me to get the f*ck out of Angela's house...lol, apparently i was screwin her. lol, funny drunk people. But yes, i had to go neways so i left then later, Cody i believe his name was kept asking Angela where i was and kept telling her to phone me and tell me to get my butt back there. Lol, i radiate popularity ^.^ its great. Hmm, but that was about it for Halloween, i would've gone trick-or-treating, but Kobe didn't feel like singing. Lol, no biggie i guess. Ange's was fun. Neways, the next day i went to the MHHS vs CHHS game, but we stopped by Lamann's first, to get my games...it seemed almost too easy. I was shur there would be some wailing and knashing of teeth. *shrugs* Then all the way to the field i kept saying strong bads "It's Over" it was fun. I tried to get my wallet out too, got it out...then it fell down my pants. Fun -.-, so yes...i fished it out when we sat down with darilyn and such, and Kayla and Angela showed up soon after us. My foot got REALLY REALLY cold so at halftime we went in and i warmed it up. I missed the whole 3rd quarter tho. lol, but i ate chili fries so it's all good. And you kno wut?!?! This time i took all the chili!! HAHAHAHA, no there was still some left, but not much....so Koby still got some ^.^ neways, that was fun and then we headed back off to the game, Hat High won hands down and then Angela and Kayla left. My dad came and took us home and i attempted to clean. lol, fun. later i got a ride with Dan back to Kobes house and we played some Fuzion Frenzy which consisted of me saying "Durty" alot. Fun fun, then we played pool and i won ^.^, i think everybody else just forfeited. Cuz everytime somebody got knocked out, i put them back in the game ^.^ well...dan put lots of people back in, but he got knocked out and so did Kobe. So the game went on forever, i was surprised i didnt get knocked out:S lol. but yes, then we watched Jason goes to Hell or sumthin, i didnt know wut it was exactly, too busy playing Trivial Pursuit! WHOOOOT!!!! i think i tied with Koby for first. HAHAHAHA. but yes, now onto Sunday. Neways i thought my soccer game was at 1, so did Kobe, so we both were half an hour late. We only learned it was at 11, cuz of my dad. WHOOOT GO DAD! but when i got back i cleaned up my room and everything then at about 2:30 Ange and Kayla both showed up, we went down into my room and played 007, Ross showed up a little bit later. After everybody was there we decided to set up the VCR which i stole from upstairs and we watched Wrong Turn. That movie is very disturbing. But i liked it cuz Angela got scared and i got to hold her ^.^ WHOOOOOOOOOT! lol, yes...great fun. The movie took up most of our time and Kayla and Ross played a bit of Mario Tennis while me and Ange played Clue. I won ^.^ lol, but then everybody headed on home and i got bored so i sat around my room not doing anything ^.^ i still have math homework. lol, but yes, i should be off now. Cyaz All! *waves*

Music - Why I'm Here by Oleander

~*Halloween*~
October 31, 2003
Mood - Worried
Well, i haven't updated in awhile so i figured i should do that ^.^ so thaz wut i did. lol, neways...wuts new in the life of kyle? *shrugs* notta whole lot, things are great. Im a little tired today for some reason. Probably cuz i didnt get much sleep last night, i have no clue why not. But yea, todays halloween ^.^ so YAY! im gonna go carroling with kobe, then i think i might go off to angelas...even if kobe doesn't want to come. I dont want to wonder aroudn and freeze my buttux off :P. but yea, angela gave me a picture of felix! Its amazing!!! I lovers it, lol, but today, yes today...hmm...sat around. People laughed at my costume cuz i was a carroler:P. and some people did a report on a fish. It was...special. Other then that today was boring. I sat around and almost fell asleep in math class *yawn* stupid tiredness:P. But neways i must be off...to...uhm...do stuff:P lol cyaz all *waves*

Music - I'm Just A Kid by Simple Plan

~*SNOW DAY*~
October 29, 2003
Mood - Holy fricken cow this is fricken amazing! *runs around flapping arms*
HOLY CRAP! CAN YOU SPELL SNOW DAY?!?!?!? AAHAHAHAHAHA. whoooo...ok, i woke up this morning and i couldn't even see out my windows. It's amazing. It's a snow day!!! I've never had one before, itz great. My dad wanted me to clean im like, this is my first and probably only snow day ever dad! u cant make me clean! ITS A SNOW DAY!!! neways i have no clue what im gonna do today, something with kobe i presume. This is a day i will never forget. So i have to make it worthwhile, not sit around at home and crap. WHOOOOOT! neways, i havent done skit yet! ^.^ but yes, itll get fun real soon! ^.^ i kno it will. After all this is snow day, theres a special kind of magic in the air. WHOOOOOOT SNOW DAY!!!! i lovers it. *sigh* ok, but yes i must be off. CYAZ ALL ill update at the end of today and say everything that ive done

Music - Pirates who don't do anything ^.^ by...uhm its on vegie tales. WHOOOT! i need more hyper music ^.^ lol

~*Happy*~
October 28, 2003
Mood - Estactic
Nothing but one thing could bring down my mood right now! And i would not let that one thing happen if it did! I am perfectly content, i really truly couldn't ask for more. ^.^ but yes, onto my days.

Friday- Well my my, did i ever get pissed friday. Let's see went to the football game with kobe and it was freezing but i got to use angela's blanket so yay ^.^ alicia came with us too. i rolled down the hill from the top and felt nausious. (howeva u spell that) but yea, didn't hurl! GOOD JOB KYLIE! Meagan was there for a bit too, but then she found other friends. Also, while we were sitting there i saw somebody who looked alot like mel come walking up to where about we sat. I ignored her, i dont need whatever skit she wants to rub in my face, but koby said she gave me a evil glare. At the end of the game i forget where me and kobe went probably to the leisure center...oh right! with alicia and we got something to eat. Koby got chili but i couldn't have ne cuz koby got the last fricken bowl!!! grrrr, neways i got a chocolate bar from the candy machine. So that was good. Neways as we were walking back i heard a familiar voice, looked over my shoulder and there was Lamann, somebody i dont remember and Mel. But neways i ignored them as well, i did alot of ignoring that day. Also they started fighting cuz Mel called Angela a hoe. I dont kno wut happened, but why the hey would angela lie? She didn't see mel when she came to glare at me. She wasn't there yet. And they didn't even kno that the chick up there was my ex yet. Why would mel? plain and simple...angela was sitting next to me, sound appropriate but w/e. Nothing was really all that terribly wrong tho till i went to the leisure center the second time with koby to warm up. We saw rachel there and sat with her. Heres the conv:
Chick - "What's going on with you and Lamann?"
Kyle - "What do you mean?"
Chick - "I heard you've been beating her and her friends."
Kyle -"What?! Who told you that?"
Chick - "Her sister, then lamann backed it up."
so anways im getting slandered as a woman beater, oh well i dont really care actually. There's nobody at crescent heights that i really chairish my relationship with and those that i do i've already told itz false. *shrugs* neways thats wut i learned on friday. I got real mad and broke the sliding door at the leisure center, kobe had to fix it for me then i stormed back to angela and kayla and them all the while complaining to koby. I then complained to everybody else and i realised i have unexpected friends in weird places. Rachel even stuck up for me. I felt special. There was some real good stuff too that day ^.^ but i was kind of mad, so it didnt help much. But that was the day, kobe came to sleep over and we was going to watch space balls but i got tired and went to bed. Now, onto saturday!

Saturday - Truly truly fun! At about 11:00 or sumthin me and kobe headed out to quiznos cuz i was too lazy to make pancakes. We ate some subs and then headed off to the mall. There we had to waste 2 whole hours and we phoned ross who informed us he wasn't coming along so w/e. Neways me and kobe goofed around until Ange and Kayla showed up at 1:30. We then went to safeway and angela bought chips then we walked back to her house. I didn't quite understand her short cuts...they seemed to make us go farther away from our destination ^.^ lol, itz great. Neways once we got there me and kobe watched our video tape of changing jareth. Lol, i love the end! its great! Me and kobe are such good actors. ^.^ neways, then we started to play monopoly and got bored but i won. i had 3 theatres. Poor angela didn't have ne property. She had the waterworks tho. RIGHT ON! neways then we hung out and was goin to watch a movie i forget wut but it didnt work. I learned i could fit in a box on the ground and i can play drums real good ^.^ lol. we went upstairs and watched the two towers. I LOVERS GIMLI ^.^! and it was real fun;) neways then we went down to her room and chilled there till they got hungry and we went to A&W. I had a poppa burger and w/e the girls didnt want to eat ^.^ lol. yay for eating. neways after that we went back and hung out and i saw mr and mrs. cunningham. They said i look differnt. I should hope so, last i saw them was a LONG time ago:P. lol but yea, that was pretty much the day then me and kobe left at about 12:00.

Sunday - Sunday was great too ^.^ for reasons i wont exactly describe in here. I went to the mall againt o see ange and kayla cuz kayla was gettin her eyebrows waxed...owers! i have a unabrow tho ^.^ so hahahaha go unabrow! lol. we hung out at the mall till about 1:30 this time i think and i tried to find the hats me and kobe were wearing the day before but i couldn't find them. Then i gave up and kayla ate a taco. Then they placed racing games and i watched, it was special. After that was all over we went to shoppers drug mart and i met kaylas mom. Kaylas mom put smelly stuff on me to see....uhm ... i wont say. ^.^ lol, neways then when we were sitting on the bench outside ange kept sayin i smelt good. AND I DID ^.^ lol, but yes that was the weekend.

Monday + Tuesday - I didn't do skit monday. It was special. Finished up what homework i had, but that was it. School was also boring, just another usual day. Today im gonna go with Kobe to the mall after school tho. So that'll be fun ^.^ yay for funness. Neways, i guess i should be off. I didnt think updating would take this long. Lol, cyaz all! *waves*

Music - Halo by Oleander.

~*New Start*~
October 24, 2003
Mood - Hope
The day is the 24th, halloween is coming up quickly and everybody seems to be getting the adrenaline for another sugar high. The sun is not yet up yet, the sky is a dullish grey which only means it'll will be soon. It is a new day, and a fresh start. I can feel winter coming. The wind is tinged with a sharp coldness warning us of the cold season soon coming. Welcome, to a new day...a new hope.

Ok, so i've been listening to here i am just a bit too much....rawr! its a good song, and i do feel like its a new start. So, thats always good, i dont plan on looking back nemore. Life goes on...mmhmm...neways. I'm feeling...inspired again...so let me write a little excert battle scene of Magic wars...or try at least

The ground around me litterly trembled. "A temple is no place for a battle" The words flowed through my mind. Who had said that? Doriph? Blaise...i would have suspected Geldin. But he ran off to grab the Voilwendar and ride him into battle. My sword jabbed forward yet again impaling another soldier. He toppled over clutching his side and my sword soon met new blades of steel. I spun smoothly causing one man to fall on his stomach and the other sword still held mine suspended in the air. With my left hand i swung my axe up and the man tumbled over. Then spinning i kicked the fallen man in the head and he went unconsious. Turning i found a group of halberds around me. Swing my axe and sword intricatly together they found i was bit too much for them and a good number of them took off to see who else they could fight. I laughed at the patheticness of it all. These were the grand soldiers of Pandora's military? I decided against it, these weren't pandora's soldiers. But caspers left over army. They were broken, thus easy to kill. I shrugged, i did not like killing nearly as much as those cut-throats i had to call my men, but when it came down to it. I always had to.

Ok, yes i kno that sux, i guess i aint as inspired as i thought...*shrugs* oh well...ill work on it. at any rate im out...cyaz all!

Music - Anoter Perfect Day by American Hi-Fi

~*Lingering*~
October 23, 2003
Mood - Isolated
Howdy everybody, im still tired. *Yawn* Sleeping sucks. Lol, but yes...yesterday i played soccer. It was great, i walked to Kobe's and then me and Kobe walked there...i saw deer ^.^ lol. Aint that exciting? Neways when we got there i warmed up but i still wasn't ready so i sucked first half...then second half i was doing alright. So yay, i also did lots science notes...BLEH! But other than that...not much happened. OOO!!! Angela came to my game, we lost horribly. I'm guessing this is going to be a year we lose most of our games. If i can get myself to play right again i think i might stand a chance. *shrugs* oh yes, another thing...please refrain from using my own tagboard to attack my character. I think i have the capabilities to judge myself thank you. At any rate i think we have to finish our language script today...uh oh. We haven't even started *cries*...*sigh* this is going to suck. lol, no...stuff we just throw together tends to be the funniest. I've been having really weird dreams of late. It's all so...weird. *sigh* Life is far too confusing for me to understand. If anybody ever figures it out can they please give me a hint or sumthing? OH YEA! I made cookies ^.^ Now...onto more depressing matters...

i think im a very bad person. A bad friend, and a bad boyfriend when i had the chance. *shrugs* why is it that anybody ever likes me neways? i dont see anything special. ok, i do...but you kno. not...anything great mind you. i expect people to be there for me with my problems...but im never there for them with theres...*sigh* I'll never forgive myself for that...most of all. *sigh* but i suppose i should be off. and ill say it once more...please refrain from using my tagboard to attack my character, or anybody elses for that matter. Thank you and goodbye. *bows*

Mood - Are you there by Oleander

~*A Glimer of Courage*~
October 22, 2003
Mood - Sad
Well...haven't updated in like a day now! OMG! neways, i was lazy yesterday lol, so i decided not to. Alicia helped me study for the science test today and hopefully ill do alright. First time in a long time that i actually studied...goodly. YAY FOR ALICIA!!! ^.^ anyways. i had a math test yesterday and i think i did pretty good...alicias in my math class too..she finished right as the bell rang. Poor girl, well at least she finished. Hope you did good! i think i did alright, i finished really quickly then went back and rechecked everything to make shur and i found 2 i woulda got wrong. But other than that i think im going to get everything right ^.^ Ok, dont quote me on that tho...lol. So yes, im completely bored. I played minesweeper flags against darilyn and beat her both times yesterday. Some reason "darilyn" looks wrong...sorry if it iz ^.^ then i played alicia and lost... lots... *sniff* shes a bumm...lol. no im jk. uhm...im going to angela's house to play monopoly this weekend. so thatll be fun. I suppose maybe i should start about why i feel sad now eh? well...i dont really like myself much anymore. I talk too much. lol, ok usually im actually quite proud of that quality, but i dont watch what im saying...*shrugs* and yea, everything is quite gone now. I'm trying to be civil to lamann...sometimes its really hard, all i want to do is snap out of it and just flip, but no. neways, i realised last time talking to her, as friends we have no hope either...so bleh i just hope nobody blames this all on me as they have been doing. I didn't do a damn thing, it was lamann that broke it off with me so bleh. Neways...i suppose i truly am single now. So Kyle the Hot and Steamy is up for grabs ^.^ lol im jk...but i suppose i should be off. Cyaz all! *waves*

Music - Graduation by Vitamin C

~*FreezerBurn*~
October 20, 2003
Mood - Indiffernt
Wow, am i updating lots more than usual? Hmmm...yes, yes i am. *shrugs* i wonder why...*ponders the idea a moment then get bored and decides to see if cactus's can fly* YAY! ^.^ neways...my ear is plugged again, but this time it hurts *sniff* i think im going to cry!!! oh! i downloaded 2 songs yesterday, now im absessed with them ^.^ lol, yes im great. Uhhh...Here I am by Brian Adams and Fight For Your Honor by New Found Glory. Goods songs! *does thumbs up*...neways. i guess im going to go activate those custom smilies Koby sent me. Ill just quickly sum up wut i did last night. Neways i was talking to a bunch of people on MSN then somebody added me and i was like..."WOW SOMEBODY WANTS TO BE ME FRIEND ^.^" so yes, it was alicia and she taught me how to play minesweeper flags. I did good...i won 2 games of 3. YAY KYLIE ^.^ neways, thaz bout it...im off all! Cyaz

Music - Here I Am - Bryan Adams

P.S. I'm Hot and Steamy ^.~

~*Reopening Wounds*~
October 19, 2003
Mood - Hurt
Hey everybody! *waves*...neways im here updating and i suppose i have to start with yesterday. Me, Koby, Ross, Angela and Kayla all went to watch The Rundown together. It was great...it had scary monkeys that i thought were going to eat them...but then it turned out they were just horny. lol, it was great. After the movie we walked home, it was good...apparently we ditched Kayla and Angela. By the by i am very sorry...i thought you had left already. But yes, today...i sat around till like 1 when Koby came over...we walked to the mall and hung out there for a bit. I saw susan and did gave her my surprised look. it was special. neways, then we walked to dans to see wut he was up to and we played halo and then went out and played basketball...i get frusterated with all the swiping...so i just tackle them...id tackle them to the ground, but we were on pavement so...no. lol. neways that was about it, i went back home after dan hit his bush with the van. lol it was great...when i got home though, the pain i felt early this morning all flooded back, especially when i was looking through my wallet...cuz i found a ID of a certain someone...*sigh* Why can't i just get over her? But, yes...i have to go for supper so cyaz all lata. *waves*

Music - In the End by Linkin Park

~*To the Depths of my Heart*~
October 18, 2003
Mood - Hurt
Howdily everybody. Not much done today, thaz weekends for ya...Kyle has nothing to do:(...*sniff*...oh wellers, thaz life...i think i might be goin to a movie tonight, but honestly i have no flippin clue... neways... i dont like i like myself much nemore...im just...stupid. *sigh* oh well, w/e. i guess i just hafta find people who are willin to put up with the loser that is me ^.^ ... or...is it me i dont like? or do people just disgust me? bleh, i have no clue. Neways...i wrote more of Magic Wars today, it was really good...i was being all smartish with politcal strategies and crap and i did a flashback...it was sad...*sniff* poor cliff...daddy had to go away. hmm...just arises more questions eh? who is...fredrick? why is it everybodies after him? hmm...yay! i wonder how ill write him into the story again...hmmm...oh wellers. Neways...oh! i had a dream in a dream...it was kewl and yes, im going to tell you all about it. It was kinda stupid...me and kobe and 2 girls were walking by the christian school and we saw a bunch of kids fighting with wooden sticks and stuff like me and kobe do...and then kobe fell down or sumthing and there was a big log in front of me and i kicked it a the kid that made kobe fall and then he stumbled back and i grabbed his stick and hit him in the face. Then i went through the rest of them beating them all up and finally they were like all gone and then i talked to like the generals of the land and water and air...yes the dream was pretty stupid...but i liked the sword fighting. i was amazing and i can still remember the formations. but yes, the generals liked me...then i woke up. YAY FOR DREAMS ^.^ lol, but yea...i suppose im gonna write some more...maybe...cyaz all *waves*

Music - Headstrong by Trapt

~*Consiously Sleeping*~
October 17, 2003
Mood - Tired, yet motivated
Today was great, gotta hang out with friends all day long. fun fun. after school i went to kobes and hung out there till about 4:30 when we went to my house. I did not know this until about half way through the football game later but koby told me there was another football game before ours at about this time...that would probably have been the one lamann was asking me if i was going to. Oh well, not like she cares...neways we downloaded music and ate pizza then headered off to our football game. I was havin fun fooling around for the good part of the game...being...me ^.^ eventually all good things come to a end tho and i started thinkin, bout the same time koby lost his energy...but neways ill highlight some of the great moments of the night...in no particular order
-Stealing dereks fishing hat
-Me styling dancing moves
-Sonic beating up Dr. Robotnic with the help of Pogo the Kangaroo
-"May i borrow your shoe for a purpose completely unrelated to Jamie?"
-"Cancer for the Handicap!"
-Kobe walking away from Lindsay. Right on Kobe!
-Givin Ross a Hug ^.^
-Telling meagan her flashy cowboy hat was hot
-Uhh....getting petted ^.^ yay
there was more..but cant remember much else,so yea... neways i was kinda upset leaving, so was kobe...but thaz life, nothing works out in ur favour. I just hope everything will turn out alright in the end. Oh yes...and just to mention...i come home a finally witness the straw that broke this camels back. Nobody should really understand that, unless u kno me better than i practically kno myself. But neways i feel like writting, that would be really nice, but eh...i cant write ^.^ too tired, and im off...cyaz all *waves*

Music- Story of a Girl by Ninedays (I lovers it!!!)

~*The Movie of my Life*~
October 16, 2003
Mood - Inspired
OK! It's 10:24 at night...but im inspired by a certain e-mail that someone sent me (u kno who u r) to do this...its supposed to be songs from differnt periods of ur life...but im just thinking...im not good with songs...wut if i actually describe those periods of my life? well here goes nothing...(of course this all aint real...itll probably turn out way diff, but itll be fun to look back and see how wrong i was:P) Neways...all starts off with some kewl...music when i was TRYING to do the thing i choose Adiemus by Enya...for those of u who dont kno, itz from lord of the rings...reminds me of the circle of life ^.^ lol neways...ull like see me as a babe (yes i was a woman before ^.~) lol, then through my childhood years till i say about end of junior high. U see me playing soccer...me making me first versions of magic wars and all that. And of course me and Kobe meeting, yay for Koby ^.^ ok, starts off with us fighting...and then we get to be friends all that crap...lol, u kno how the story goes...i think u need to hate a person before u can truly be friends ^.^ lol, yay koby. Then comes about grade 8 the end, i meet me first g/f. Enter, Danika. U all kno wut happened with Danika, thered be all depressing music when its depressing and happy music when its happy. Then finally i move on and you like see a day in the life of me in grade 9. Hysterical aint it? lol...neways...then i move onto end of january and when i meet lamann...(if u cant tell im doin this all really quickly cuz itz the past and i wanna get the future...lol) neways all the same skit happens lots of "i love u music" for the first 6 months...then depressing music as it starts to end. And we can even excite it up by making a actual suicidal moment or sumthin....but i get better and move on. Friendships improve between me and my friends...Danika, Dan, Ross, Kayla, even Trista ^.^...i pretend and act like everythings fine with Lamann...howeva she gets a new b/f and i freak. i let go after a stern..."talk" lets say between me and a close relative. i completely go away knowing i could never let go completely and still be friends. And i never see her or any of her family or friends again. Grad starts coming up and issues arise about which grad everybodys going to. I end up going to chem-free (i dont like alchohol...bleh) and kobe comes with just for the sake of friendship. By this time i probably have a g/f again and shes my date to the prom. At the grad me and koby make a pack that no matter wut on at least our 20th, 30th, 40th, and so on birthdays we would call each other if no more than that. And we'd get together for em too. Me and Koby go to colledge together and when we head off to university i have to let go of me new girl...its hard...but i make it through. At unversity i meet a bunch of nice girls and actualy have a pick of like 2 or 3 of em...i end up picking a really cute and nice one and when i finish colledge i confront her to say im going back home to medicine hat now and she says becuz shes done school too she'll come with me and that shed follow me everywhere. Also while we were in unversity Koby ends up seeing rachel in a mall or sumthin in calgary and starts talking to each other. They feel they screwed up real bad and get back together. YAY FOR KOBE ^.^ Then all 4 of us, me, ma girl, kobe, and rachel all go back to medicine hat together. Rachel confronts her parents and crap and koby defends her and my old g/f that i left when i went to calgary confronts me saying how shes been faithful and all this stuff and flips when i introduce the new girlfriend. She slanders to my new g/f behind my back and then the new one is all pissed at me too. Kobe and Rach are happy tho ^.^ Me and Koby both find jobs but he requires to go down into the states. So Koby and Rachel make say thier goodbyes from my life and pack up to move in the states...oh yes, itz for big $$$$$....lol, i find a smaller one for less mulah up north but i finally get the home of my dreams. The g/f from edmonton realises the slanders are false and she decides to come with me. We find a small cabin with one plug in for electricity but she says as long as shes with me shes happy. Everything is great ^.^ i get promoted in the job really fast and now i can do work at home. The house gets built up pretty good and everything and one day im out at work doing some things on site that i cant do at home...i return home and i hear sudden quick noises upstairs. I go upstairs and find my wife cheating on me. Life goes ploop awfully quickly and i try to cling to wut i had but it hurts to much. My wife tries to comfort me about how she "loves" me very much and doesn't like to see me like this. Neways my 30th is like a month soon and i get a call from Koby. I tell him wutz been going on and he tells me to move on. Him and rachel are still together and already have 2 kids. Kobe says i should fly down to new york (i have no clue) and get divorced and make a new start and everything. So i agree and go down to where Koby is after the divorce papers are out of the way. Also i get a talking to by my wifes lover who says im clinging to the "old ways" i laugh at him and leave, taking what is entitled to me with me. I go to new york and stay with Koby for awhile. After a good couple months i meet a unexpected friend. A woman shows up that ends up being my wife. She says she followed her friend the city. She just lost her b/f a few months ago when she found out he was just using her. She dumped him and was now single again, we decide to make a go of it and things work out fine. I end up married to again and Koby and Rachel and everybody attend my wedding. This wedding is outdoors and stuff and its all cool down in the states where its warm. Then we drive up to the mountains where theres snow and stuff and have our honeymoon in a logcabin. She inspires me again to finish writing magic wars and i do and it sells for LOTS of money and i get rich. The book is turned into a movie and we get even richer. My 40th comes up and another call from Koby. He tells me things arent looking so good between him and rachel. They've seen councilors and such but they just keep fighting. They come up to Canada again to see us for our 40th...meanwhile me and my new wife have had twin boys and they're maybe 6 or 5 by now. Koby and Rachel still are fighting but then a school reunion comes up. We go back to medicine hat all together and meet long forgoten friends. Again Rachel ends up confronting her parents. At first theres screaming and fighting but Koby supports rachel and their relationship is good again. Also they both end up smoothing things over with rachels parents and everything is happy. In town i end up meeting Lamann again and we talk about everything that's happened. She says she really screwed up when she let me go but shes alright...shes had lotsa boyfriends but none that were very serious about getting married...She meets someone at the school reunion tho and things look up...again shes out of my life. I see dan again and kayla and ross...ross is a farmer now, a rich one at that too. Dan is...well...w/e dan wants to do. lol, they both have wives and everything is all good. Also i meet my g/f from high school and she apologizes for trying to wreck things between me and my ex-wife. i tell her wut happened between us and she kinda rubs it in my face. (She knew it would happen kinda thing) But then i introduce her to me new wife and shes happy for me and she introduces me to her husband and im happy for her as well. Pretty much...everything winds up happily. Koby and Rachel decide the city wasn't good for them, too much crime and such and move out to the country with me and my wife. and thaz pretty much the rest of the adventure until one of us passes on...which i really dont want to think about yet. but thaz pretty muc it...and i needa go to bed. Cyaz all

P.S. Im sorry if i've made anyone hurt or angry by this entry. It's just a big guess and i wouldn't be surprised to find it wrong. So if you're angry in anyway about how i made ur life turn out, i am deeply sorry, i hope nobody gets mad.

Music - American Pshyco by Treble Charger

~*^.^ FUN ^.^*~
October 15, 2003
Mood - Tired
OK! First off i want everbody to look at the left side margin thinger...i made it wider and i feel damn proud of that...oui je paint skills est sexy non? ^.^ im so damn proud...lol, i dont care if somebody knows how to do it real easy im proud. But neways onto my day.
Science- sang Happy Birthday to Bobby ^.^ HAPPY B-DAY BOB!!!
Lang- read a story bout some children who killed their parents...*sniff* we were all so proud
TA- 5 mins long...YAY ^.^
Design- Finished all me work and did language
Math- Uhm...did work?
After school there was a band rehersal so i went to that, apparently theres one every early wednesday. So wut? Does every teacher BUT mr. rappaport have a meeting that day? lol. neways after i mooched a ride from kobe and we walked to his moms place and then got a ride home from his dad ^.^...yes i kno that makes sense. We played x-box most of the night at Kobes...but we did homework too...it was great...i couldn't stop laughing for a moment...it was weird. Neways that was me day. It was fun ^.^ but i should be off...cyaz all *waves*

Music - Are you there by Oleander

~*Run from Me*~
October 14, 2003
Mood - Confused
I am SOOOOOOO confused. All last night i had to think, and...everything i think at one moment i counterdict at another. *sigh*...its all so stupid. I wish feelings could be definate, but i suppose not. Hmm...i guess me and lamann faced the truest test, and we didnt love each other enough to overcome it. *sigh* i wish everything could go back to how it was. Why do i keep imagining me pulling a drawstring to nock an arrow. My own brain confuses me, why should i even try to contemplate anybody elses? I think im insane, truly. Nobody believes me of course, cuz everytime i told one particular person anything bad about me she couldn't believe it...neways...yesterday? not much...watched a knights tale...dont kno why, it got to me. i liked how the princess was all crazy about the knight and crap ^.^ lol...*sniff* i wish somebody was crazy about me. I would've liked it...but the guy was all stupid so no. Oh yea! i also realised my emotions are VERY WHACKED! normally when i see something coming like that u kno is gonna happen but the dude in the story doesnt...i got that unseen smile in the back of my head. Now...well now i burst out into tears. Its so gay, people are going to call me a wuss *cries*...bammit...life is too hard...*groan* i suppose i did have my time of a perfect life...a whole 6 months....i dont count the 7th...cuz it was as messed as it is now. But for 6 months...*sigh* neways i suppose i should stop holding onto the past, and get over it. But its hard *sigh* neways im off...i dont really know what to say anymore. Cyaz all

Music - A Friend of Mine by Treble Charger

~*A House of Depression*~
October 12, 2003
Mood - Depressed
Howdy. Well im back from elkwater for thanksgiving. It was fun, but before i begin about that...i want to address something. Deen, im sorry. Why im such a Asshole when i get hurt i have no clue. i shouldn't be like this to anybody, but i am...i just looked at my friends and like...wow...most of these friends aren't even really mine. So yay, koby ^.^ but you're right. i shouldn't be such a ass, thaz no excuse. oh yea, and u never updated...lol jk. Neways, i hope you forgive me and accept my apology. Im being an ass to everybody lately that can somehow hurt me. Im sorry. Now onto the trip.

First day...hmmm...we got there and unpacked and stuff and it was annoying. I played around with the soccer ball for a bit, and was like...whooo im good ^.^ lol, then we went to the restaurant and some girls walked in and the people i was with was trying to set me up with em...it was VERY embarrasing...im shur they could've heard...grrr...stupid people. Neways then we went back and had a fire...oooo fire...it was, fun? During that time, i came up with i think what will be the final version of weapons for cliff. I'm thinking he can have the sword of stone (obviously) and his now double bladed axe. Sword goes in right hand, axe in left. Then the shield goes on his left arm and finally a barbed bow hangs off of his shoulders. So when he runs up and hits them like gimli (GO GIMLI) the barbs will like pierce their skin too...and plus then i could have a ranged weapon...besides magic. Then i read a bit and went to bed.

The next day was...eventful. It was actually really fun...i woke up late and took a shower. I then fooled around with the soccer ball for a bit again, then i think we hiked mount baldie...it was fun. after that at hot dogs and then i went to the bridge to reflect on my life...yepps...but before i could do much reflecting i heard some people coming so i didnt want to look like a idiot i started walking...im mean seriously who stands on a bridge. but yes, we started walking and i believe it was two of girls from the restaurant...so that was...awkward. I went back to my campsite and got bored for a bit then grabbed the ball and went to practice soccer. I did really good...got it over my head lots and actually stalled the ball on me foot. Neways while i was doing that, those girls came out again and sat on the swings...i think they was watching me *blush* neways i was doing good so i didnt care. Then after a while i finished playing and had to move stuff over to the kitchenette. great fun...so then we ate our thanksgiving supper, yummy...*rubs tummy* then when dessert was there, which i didn't eat cuz i got full and started to play a very small game of soccer with joe those girls came yet again...right into the kitchenette cuz i guess my aunt knew them. so it wasn't that bad...i was just beating joe sensless in soccer...lol then we went outside, thaz when things went wrong. MY AUNT AND MY MOM STARTED TRYING TO GET ME TO HOOK UP WITH EM!!! They was all like "He's a really nice boy, u should go ask him if he'd teach you to play soccer....blah blah blah...blah blah blah..." Then im thinking "DORK ALERT! DORK ALERT!" so of course they left right away and went back to their campsite...they came back on the swings again tho, dont kno if that means nething. But yes, i poked my head into the kitchenette after they were gone and told me aunt and me mom that i hate them ^.^ it was special. After that was all said and done we went to bingo ^.^ yay, best part of the trip. lol...not really. but lets pretend. On the way to bingo must've been the funniest thing ive seen in quite awhile...we were driving along the road and we saw a porcipine come out of the bushes...and he was all mad with his spikes out and everything...then the two stupid kids in the back we all like "look its a beaver" it was hilaroius. But yes, bing...I won a ham ^.^ a ham for the ham ^.^ it was great...then i wasn't really all that close to winning anything else till the last cards...it was blackout and u win half the money raised from the blackout cards...and i had 1 number left!!!! so i almost won $109!!! i wanted the money *sniff sniff* oh and the lady thought i was 18...im like...uhm ull have to get me mom to sign that. KAKAKAKAKA...special eh? then when we came back we had a fire and it was colorful ^.^ we put this powder in it, and the flames turned green and blue and all differnt colours...and ORANGE!!! lol, it was amazing. then it slowly died out and i went to bed cuz i was getting cold.

The next day would be....TODAY O.O lol, so yes...i took a shower early in the morning and the water was cold so it was really uncomfortable...not much happened...i wondered around the campsite aimlessly for the first bit...till i went inside and read. Then i gathered up me stuff and got ready to come back home. at about 11:15 we left and arrived at about 12:00 i got ready and then went to the fieldhouse. Played some hardcore soccer...lol, i was tuckered out from all my playing yesterday lol, we ended up losing. but i didnt let felix outrun me so i was proud. kinda...i screwed up bad, i went to pass it to kobe, but felix intercepted it ran on net and scored. *sigh*...that sucked...neways ill do better next game *nods happily* and...well that brings us to now

I suppose not much else to say, uhmmm...when i got home i started to cry...heh no good eh? but yea, ill be fine. I suppose im off, cyaz all.

Music - Hurt by Johnny Cash (YAY U GO JOHNNY!)

~*Lifes the Skit*~
October 7, 2003
Mood - Skitty
Hey everybody well, yes, im in a terrible mood, but my colds almost gone...so thaz good *thumbs up* neways, i was thinking alot last night. Then some people got mad at me for thinking...grrrr, that just makes me angry but w/e. I how my life is always like this, the only reason i ever get anything good is just so it can be taken away again. I dont need any of this! I want to be that happy go-lucky kid that annoys everybody. But w/e, i guess im stuck in this pit of depression for a good couple months...*sigh* i hate life. I had a nice life, i was quite happy with it, then people start entering and making everything screwy. So what the fucking hell, if you're just going to make my life like this then why even enter it! i hate you fucking all!!! *sigh* i realised theres very few people i can go to anymore. Oh yes, i drew a very pitiful drawing last night......itz of a castle wall with 2 holes in it...one makes it look like a bridge that leads u off onto plains with like mountains behind it....then the other is a hole that was smashed in the wall that leads u to like the praries with a single tree. Then up at the top there are two castles...and theres a giant coffin....then it just started to get gay from there. ok, maybe it started to get gay before that...but w/e. neways should i quit my complaining? maybe i should just pack up...forget about the past. Block it out, forget EVERYTHING! that would be nice, to forget the warm touch of someone, to forget the feel of being loved. Yay! ^.^ *sigh* why cant things ever go MY way for once? i feel like killing somebody, maybe even myself, but i dont think so...just emotions. They're always just emotions, but i guess ill go neways. I bet ur all sick of hearing me complain. W/e, cyaz all

Music - I'm Just A Kid by Simple Plan

~*Life in the Wild*~
October 4, 2003
Mood - Sick
Howdy everybody ive decided to update bout my lil excursion to Eagle's Nest. It was really fun...but lets start from the beginning...

Well you see, after i school i walked with alisha to get her books...then we went to band room together where we didn't have to wait long till the bus arrived. i took my stuff to the bus and got it loaded on. Then went onto the bus and sang on our way do. Which i really regret now...lol, in fact i regret alot of things right now, but thaz ok...everybody gets a cold once in awhile...right? Once we got to the ranch we unloaded our stuff and went into our cabins. Me and Kobe picked the two beds in the far right hand corner...we dediced there were better beds when Andy tried sleep in a bed next to us. Neways then we played and my throat was killing me, and once we got a break i went and got a pop and it was VERY useful for the rest of the playing...thinger...lol then came supper which was hamburgers ^.^ it was yummy...after supper we played a bit of soccer and then went back to practicing but just with our instruments. So i just practiced the trombones and i realised how much i dont like a certain particular person but i wont say names...neways he deserved to act that way, but just cuz u can doesnt mean u should. Then we went back to playing soccer and played till it got too dark to see nemore and went inside the lodge. Some guy made us a fire and then the dance started. I did lotsa dancing...and i got a free pop. Once during a slow song i ran up onto the stage and started doin the YMCA everybody laughed and cheered for me it was great. Then i started to pretend i was drunk...and it was fun. During the dance i met this one guy who was REALLY cool. He like used to be in band class but dropped out after gr 9. He played the drums really good and like in the minor grades he'd beatbox for fun with his friends. And he told me know he likes composes music...the best i understood of wut kinda of music he composed was musical experience or sumthin like that. But i have no clue. He also told me in like grade 9 he went to trinidad and the bahamas for missionary work. Im all like, wow this guy really has a hold on his life. He told me he's in training right now, and after like a couple months hes going to do more missionary work. He says he has no clue where he's going in life...but he feels that its going to be really good. And then i told him that id love to stay and chat with him but i had to go to the bathroom cuz i had a cold. And he asked why i had a cold im all like "i dunno" then he liked said do u want me to heal u? im like...uh shur...if u can make it go away. So he like gripped my shoulders and asked me if i believed i could be healed and said it didn't really matter cuz he would believe for me. Then he said in the name of jesus christ, the savior, may u be healed. Then he tapped me on the stomach. Then we said our goodbyes and i didnt talk to him again till the end of the trip. The rest of the dance was pretty fun...i wasn't THAT sick then...but it was fun. Laurissa tought me how to swing dance and it was really fun shes like..."whoa thaz really kewl"...then she told randy wut i did when we both spun around and w/e. I felt special for not knowing what i was doing but doin a good job neways. The dance ended later and i went back to my room, kobe had ditched the dance before and was hanging out with jeremy in the field. I came out once to see wut was wrong...but he was with a bunch of girls and stuff so it was all good. I knew percisly wut was wrong, i just felt maybe i should go outside to see if he wanted to talk, i kno wut its like to fell like that. But he was fine so i went back into the dance...so then when the dance was over..thaz when me and kobe talked. Its so great when u start to talk like that, cuz u dont wanna quit. After i took a leak tho we decided to call it night and it was like already 3 in tha morning.

The next day i woke up at 7...kobe woke me up. i slowly got dressed and everything and consumed the last of my cough drops...that wasn't good. I went down to have a shower but needed first kobys towel...then kobys shampoo. So i had to wait for awhile, then i gave the shampoo to somebody. Lol, maybe i should have told them it was kobys cuz when we went to look for it it was still in a shower. But we didnt' do much till breakfast. For breakfast was like toast and bacon and all that sorta stuff. After that we went to our last rehersal. Then we had lunch that consisted of tacos. it was good...cept mine fell apart. so mine became a salad. But we sat with...that very annoying person which i do not like and he only confirmed my suspicions that i DO NOT LIKE HIM. then people went off to do their activities and we played human foosball then volleyball. it was fun, but i eventually got bored and my throat really hurt...so we just hanged around the enterence till the bus came. And that was pretty much me day. I was enormously sick on me way back and felt like skit. Me throat was all soar and my nose was runny...it sucked harsly. But then i got home and took some buckleys and such and well...i feel better at any rate. Well im going to get something to eat now and then lie down and probably go to sleep. I have no real reason to stay awake, i called Lamann twice, but no answer. So yea, im off cyaz all.

Music - Me coughing...

~*Peace*~
October 2, 2003
Mood - Peaceful
Howdidly! Me day was...hecktic...but it all started with me waking up without music...

"mmm..hmm?" *looks at clock* "OMG!! MY ALARM CLOCK DIDN'T RING I GOT 15 MINS TO GET READY!!!"

lol ok so thaz easy for me...but still hectic none the less...i managed a 5 minute shower and gelled me hair when it was still wet...obviously i didnt like me hair for most of today...but i made it to the bus on time ^.^ go kylie! lol...sooo then it was off to school...lately ive been quiet on the bus. Was so again today. it's special. Got to school and was dissapointed cuz i thought our first soccer game WAS today...*sigh* not till next week:( lol, oh well..itll be awesome! neways......theres a football game tomorrow...cant go to it...*sniff* really sux but oh well. im heading off to band retreat...i have no clue what im going to do. Theres supposed to be a dance and swimming and stuff...ill probably just warm up for soccer the whole time...ohhh that reminds me...KOBY?!?!?! lol..where is that boy when u need him? oh well. tonight...hmmm...wut am i doing tonight? nothing...that i can think of. I got a math test tomorrow though...*sigh* i dont like tests. Whyd they choose the shortest day of the week neways? thaz just stupid... *shakes head* oh well...i suppose i should probably back for tomorrow...and i think im coming down with a cold. *cries* i dont wanna be sick!!! hurumph...this is stupid. oh well thaz life i suppose...i now need to...go do laundry and crap...so im off, cyaz all! *waves*

Music - OH RIGHT! MUSIC ^.^

~*Truth?*~
September 30, 2003
Mood - Angry
Hey everybody. It's 7:42 right now, just thought id make an entry right now...i dont know why exactly. I just need something to cry my pain too. Neways i think im scum. I shur feels like it, the way people treat me. If i say something people are all like hmmph...but if somebody else says the same thing they're all like they're right! They're such a genius. Its so agrivating. Anyways thats what my problem is, but i shouldn't have a problem should i? Today im going to the Hat High vs McCoy football game, so thall be fun, im gonna meet Kayla and Angela. It'll be fun. .......hmmm.......yea, so today ive got science, lang, design, and math. Im not shur...but is it today we have the sub and work on our cum review? cuz if it is thall be fun ^.^ yay! and design'll be fun too if we dont have to work on notes and such. other than that school is going to suck. I dont like language...but science is kinda fun...cuz i just sit there and act stupid. heh, neways...how much longer till school starts (yes im actually enjoying school) it seems to be the only place i can be happy anymore. whew...i wish i COULD be free, free of this need for other people to cheer me up. I wish i could be alone...maybe with one other person, and thaz how id spend my life. i would never ask for more than that...the thing now is finding that one other person *sigh* i hate this...its so annoying. neways i best be off, cyaz all *waves*

Music - Makes No Differnce by Sum 41

~*Hell's Pain*~
September 29
Mood - Depressed
Hey everybody...well neways about me day. First off it began with me waking up and having a shower...all that usual stuff. Then i got depressed again...began looking for a knife and thought better of it...that was morning ^.^ great eh? Well then i headed off for school didnt cheer up till maybe who knows...band class? i got mad...cuz i did amazing on my rythm thinger...i didnt make one mistake, but he gave me a 4+ and a 5....lol, i guess i dont care. Just i tied curtis...and he screwed up bad. But eh, maybe i screwed up too...i just didnt see it. I forget to say the and at the end...but i dont think that would count as a screw up. it was the end of the line neways...well w/e. i dont suppose it matters. im going to eagles nest this weekend, i hope itll be fun. hopefully it will be ^.^ me and kobers are gonna play soccer. and yea...but neways...then was lunch, didnt do nething during lunch...all i kno was i was happy by then. math was great, got to work on our cum review...again ^.^ yay! lol...and i started the new book in design...talk about confusing...lol but im figuring it out ^.^ go kylie! yeppers..then...not much else happened. Tomorrow im gonna go to the hat high vs mccoy football game and meet kayla and angela. Itll be fun. i was thinkin i would ask lamann if shed like to join me...but i doubt shed want to see me now...neways...i suppose i should be off. Ill update lata. Cyaz all *waves*

Music - The Anthem by Good Charlotte

~*A New Light*~
September 27 (later)
Mood - ^.^ (do u really need more than that?)
HEY!!! ^.^ Kyle is happy again. Its special. Mood swings are fun! lol, i went out shopping and i got new pants! 2 new pairs of jeans and a new shirt. YAY! they're all so great...im gonna name them! ^.^ lol, neways...bout before, i dunno..life sucked i guess? in a way it still does...but i wont think bout that until i get a call from lamann again if i even do. But yea, thatll be the time. I dont exactlly feel like being misserable right now. NEWAYS! hmmmmmmm? im...really bored. I think im gonna go play games...more. thaz always fun ^.^ yeppers....uhhhhh.........well i really got nothing else to say. eh? hahahaha...ok im off. cyaz all!

Music - Another Perfect Day by American Hi-Fi

~*Twister*~
Septmeber 27
Mood - Misserable
YAY! Kyles misserable! Now everybody else can be fucking happy. I hate this fucking life. All i do is make people upset becuz i get upset. W/e im practically had enough. Why do people spin me around in circles like a fucking top? One moment its one way, the next its another. I hate it. But w/e, thaz life i suppose. Yes, thats right...life is all about making Kyle misserable! ^.^ fun eh? Some people are better at life than others i suppose. But w/e i can see why nobody wants to talk to me. Then again who was the person not talking in the first place? Yay call me...then sit there and watch TV, yay...im so fucking important. Well w/e, i dont care. I hate myself...one moment...im filled with utter joy. Finally feel complete. Then the next ur blown fucking apart. Sorry for all the...improper language. Im kinda pissed and misserable at the moment. Right now, id give anything to be alone. Completely alone, well not true, thatz part the reason why im so misserable, cuz im completely alone. Doesn't make sense now does it? Well...w/e. Oh i guess i should talk about my day now.....well yesterday...went to 2 football games, today im goin to get new jeans and probably go to dans later...lamann said shed call me later too...hah, im laughing at that one cuz ya kno, she never calls when she says she will. So yea, neways i suppose ur all sick of my complaining about my lousy life. I feel like ripping someone's throat out...ahhh the joys of being a wolf...*sigh* w/e im off.

Music - The slow sound of my life being ground into nothing and being blown into the wind. Ahh, wut utter bliss.

~*Taking it to the Grave*~
September 25
Mood - Hurt
Why is that people hate each other? We're all disgusting just the same. *shakes head sadly* Well neways, its 7:32 in the morning and i want to go back to bed where i cant feel so much damn pain. That would be nice. Lots of things would be nice, but currently my heart is stuck in my throat...i have no clue why im scared. Ok, so i do..but im not saying why. Why can't life be as simple as science makes it seem? Oh w/e. I suppose its the way things are. Hmm? Death? I wonder how that would be...no, *shakes head* no way, death dont solve anything. Jesus, i gotta get a hold on my life....its slidding downhill and im not even trying to regain my footing anymore...its...bleh. Let's see we are all going to clap in band today. Fun Fun. Not really...but hey, just thinkin on into the day and wut we're going to do. I've been daydreaming far too often again, maybe if id just start paying attention to reality...but why? reality fricken sucks...*sigh* I hate this...i really do. I hate being torn apart like this. I want to fricken cry.....BLEH! grrrrrr...neways yesterday i downloaded Perfect by Simple Plan cuz Koby told me to do it...who, way to similar to my life...in fact, i think life enjoys mocking me...its a special thing we got going on here, i feel depressed...life mocks me, i want to die. Its special no? Yea...well neways, i should probably stop complaining now and get my stuff together for school...I dont like this pain, why cant it just disapeer? Well w/e, im taking it to the grave with me. Cyaz all! *waves*

Music- Perfect by Simple Plan....yes again! Shut up.

~*The Need for a Hug*~
September 24, 2003
Mood - Alone
Wow, its 9:15 now and i haven't talked to Lamann at all. Maybe itll all be better this way, but that was no way to say goodbye. *sigh* well w/e, Kyle doesnt care, he hates being toyed with though. I wish i came to a almost death filled experience, maybe then some people would appreciate me being alive. *sigh* whatever. Science makes life so simple, i actually enjoy it. To picture everything as atoms...no feeling, no pain. Its quite refreshing. I wonder what actually causes emotions? Glands? and chemicals? Bleh...its all really quite confusing...and simplistic in a weird sort of way. Neways i just figured i should write some stuff in here, i wont go into detail bout my boring life, cuz all id end up doing is whining. But im off! Cyaz all.

Music - Perfect by Simple Plan

~*The Joy of Pain*~
September 23, 2003
Mood - Not to shur
Well...howdy everybody. I shur did like getting home today. I come home to an angry lamann who talks to me, leaves, comes back and snapps on me. Then she apologize for screwin up my life. Then she fricken freaks out on me...grrr. I dont like this. We both need to talk, a very serious one indeed. But yes, im making myself not care so much anymore, i dont want to end up like Mel, sorry mel, no offense, i just dont want to feel this pain for a whole year. Nobody should have to endure that if u ask me. Anyways...ill leave all that stuff behind me and begin what happened today. Le'ts see. It all started with science class. It was...ordinary. Did some labs about separating mixtures. Too easy. Then went off to TA, it was boring...we got our pictures back. I look like skit. I hate it but bleh. IM GOING TO BE HAPPY NOW CUZ THE 2 NEXT CLASSES WERE HAPPY ^.^ Ok! I went into band class got my trombone and everything ready and the chair positions were up. At first i didnt even want to look, cuz i was afraid id get like 4th chair or something. But i went over to the board to look, and i was SECOND!!! ^.^ I beat 2 people in grades above me. Go me! im the only Gr 10 to get second trombone. Curtis, who was 1st last year is now 3rd. HAHAHAHAHAHA. uh..no itz ok really. And then he was all mopey the rest of the class. It was VERY annoying. I mean, i kno wut its like but jeesus! At least Mr. Rappaport doens't believe in the challenge, so yay! Im 2nd Trombone:D uhhh yea, it was happy. Only 3 people beat me...and i beat 3 people...lol:P im in the middle! GO KYLIE!!! Neways that was pretty much it for band class...then it was lunch. Boring as usual, i dont get it...cept i kept singing "The Bare Necessities" it was fun. Then off to design class. THE FUNNEST CLASS I HAD IN A LONG TIME!!! We worked on Book 2 for AutoCAD, it was amazing! I got through the whole practice and got to the very end and then looked at the excersizes and was like...WUT?!?! but then brian showed me some stuff drawn in his book...and im like..."OHHH" so both me and brian are done! its special. Meanwhile im helping cotrell with the first book...lol. Its great. Then off to math class, and it was boring as usual. but that was it, i sat with Jenna on the way home on the bus and we talked about on the first day of school and the bus stopped on the hill...all too funny. Lol, memories. But yes, that was my day up till now...exciting eh? But yes, im off cyaz all.

Music - The Bare Necessities!!! YAY >.<

~*Too Early...*~
September 23, 2003
Mood - Tired
*Yawn* Man...i should go to bed earlier. I stayed up far too late talking to people who would listen. Yea, i like to complain about my misserable life. ITS FUN! hmm...neways. Hows everybody out there doing? Im...tired *yawn* lol...its special. Well i decided what im going to do this weekend! YAY FOR KYLE! Im going to sit down and finish ALL of my language and do a good chunk of AutoCAD. It's not like ill have anything better to do. I have no social life, its great. Hmm? I'm guessin this aint gonna be that much longer, cuz theres really nothing important. OH! Yesterday I went to be with a stick, its special. I dont exactly feel...safe at the moment. *sigh* oh well. but im gonna see if i can finish up that language assignment so maybe i can free up some time this weekend if somebody wants to do something (hint hint) lol. i wonder when Indoor starts? i really want to go hang out there and waste my life there...well its not exactly wasting, i get better...and yea. It's special. But im off and id just like to thank everybody who has been willing to listen to my incessant whinning. It helps, even those of you who i haven't whinned too...at least u were there if i needed ya right?...heh, well i hope so. Lol, im off. Cyaz all

Music - Hate every beautiful Day by Sugarcult...wait wasn't i listening to this yesterday? Trippy...

Best Acting- Id say this one goes to Jennifer LeBlanc. GOOD JOB JEN! Ur just a good actor...and good job Laura...u were her partner...heh:S...
Best Script- Marge's and Sarah had really good vocab and everything. But it was kind of hard to believe that someone would talk like that when they talk, but ill give em this award just cuz they had lotsa good vocab.
Loudest Laugh- ME AND KOBY!!! *squirms happily* Ok, i give us this one just cuz everybody else only laughed at people falling down or throwing a book suddenly...we had actual jokes. I couldn't even hear koby say "thunk, thunk" and neither could he. So i figure the joke of forgetting to take off ur boots won us that one.
Best Supporting Role- Ok, i WOULD give this one to Curtis and Shawn, but they didn't end up having me as the cyclist...so i decided that they dont scratch me back i dont scratch theres! hurumph! lol, neways ill give it to the group of 3 just cuz they had actions and it was funny...either them or Angela and Robynn...the doctor in that one was way too cool!
Best Overall- Hmmm...hard to say, there were lots of good ones, i dont really know who i would say was the best one overall. I think this one is still up for grabs...we'll have to see wut Mrs. Nesdoly thought.