This page is going to get me banned by Surfwatch and Net Nanny and other such programs. It's also likely to be the most often hit page on my site. I only guess this because if I saw such a link on someone else's page, I know I'd check it right out. And I assume that most people, while not quite the pervs I am, are still pervy enough to peek at the sex page.
I hope you're not going to be too disappointed by this, but this page isn't going to be very raunchy. That's been done. A lot. And better than I could, in some cases. There will be some links to some rather provocative stuff though, so watch out folks. If you're of a delicate constitution, or easily offended you might want to read something else about me.
While I'm not going to give a play-by-play of my last night in bed, I'm not going to mince words either. Are you sure you want to know about my thoughts on sex and love and stuff? If not, I won't hold it against you if you back out.
I mean it folks.
Still with me? Good. I like courage.
Well, let's start with the basics. If you got here through my front page, it should be fairly obvious that I like men. I like them a lot. Especially covered in chocolate sauce. There's one man in particular I love, and he is maskwa, my sweet bear. In a lot of different senses of the word bear too, I might add. But that will be explored elsewhere.
What's that mean? I'm bisexual. A lot of you out there reading this already knew that, but if you didn't then *surprise!* Yes, I'm one of the few, the proud, the bi. I guess I'm about a Kinsey 5, but I never really pay attention to the Kinsey scale since my desires wander from one extreme to the other every few minutes. It's not always easy, but I can live with it.
Why am I bi? Hell, I don't know. I just am. Why are you straight? Or gay? Have you ever asked yourself that? Chances are if you're straight, you haven't. After all, it's "normal." Chances are if you're gay or bi you have asked that question of yourself. Any answers? I'd really like to hear from folks out there about this one. Especially anyone who's straight and really takes time to consider the question. Let me know what you come up with, okay? I'm very curious.
Coming out has been an interesting process to say the least. I've gotten the whole range of reactions, from complete acceptance to some subtle hostility. I've never had a really bad reaction from anyone, but I've also chosen my audiences carefully. I simply don't tell the people who I think are going to react violently or abusively. They tend not to be the kind of people I want to spend time with anyways, so the issue has never become a major one yet.
Coming out in high school was a very enlightening experience though. My friends when they found out about me were all very cool about the whole thing. To my face at least. And to be perfectly honest, that's more than I was expecting. Behind my back, comments were made but no one ever said anything nasty to my face about it. I know I should feel offended that they were afraid to tell me what they really thought, but let's be really honest here. It was high school. Emotional maturity and honesty are not really what anyone should expect to find in high school.
Since then, my luck has improved infinitely. I've fallen in with a group of friends who are marvelous about the whole thing. Guys, thank you all for being so supportive. The crowd I started running with in University is so full of people like myself in one way or another that it's really hard to be judgemental about anyone else in the crew. And I like it fine this way. You'll never find as supportive or understanding group of friends, and that to me is about the most precious thing I can think of.
So high school's as close as I've been to a negative situation based on my sexual orientation. The fact that I'm a big beefy lad who looks all scary in black has probably made a lot of difference. The fact that maskwa is even bigger, and can look even scarier probably saves us a lot of trouble in public. Or then again, maybe society is starting to open up and homophobia is fading away. I'd like to think the latter, but still I have to believe the former has more to do with it. But since it works, I'll live with it.
There's been a lot of debates in the bisexual community about what we should be calling ourselves actually. I like bisexual, since people tend to know what I mean when I use the term, and that's what communication is about really. I've also heard omnisexual, pansexual and countless other variations on the theme. And while I am bi, I also think pansexual is a useful term, especially when attempting to describe other aspects of my sexuality. There's a lot more to desire than just gender attraction.
Alternative sexuality is an over-used term, but it does make sense. After all, anything that turns me on that doesn't do anything for you is alternative to you. But I don't really like the term myself. I prefer simply describing myself as versatile. There's a list of things I could describe that would fill my quota with Geocities, and would probably freak a lot of folks out as well, which is not my goal at all. So if you'd like a more detailed discussion of the various kinks and such I find interesting just let me know and we can chat.
Love? That's a different matter. And one that you're going to have to give more time to compile my thoughts on...