I'd hate to see you go, but I'd love to watch you leave!
I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
If I want any shit outta you I'll squeeze your head.
If I wanted to hear from an ass, I'd fart.
I've come across decomposed bodies that are less offensive than you are.
Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you be yourself.
Please breathe the other way. You're bleaching my hair.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just gargled.
The next time you shave, could you stand a little closer to the razor?
The twinkle in his eyes is actually the sun shining between his ears.
The wheel is still spinning but the hamsters dead.
They said you were a great asset. I told them they were off by two letters.
When I look into your eyes, I see the back of your head.
When you feel terrific, notify your face.
You are living proof that manure can grow legs and walk.
You've got your head so far up your ass you can chew your food twice.
You've never been outspoken; no one has ever been able to.
Do you want people to accept you as you are or do you want them to like you?
Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?
Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.
Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?
I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.
I've seen people like you before, but I had to pay admission!
Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
Some day you will find yourself - and wish you hadn't.