We stood there looking at each other for a second before Hayden finally spoke up.
�Hey Addie�..how are you doing?� he asked with a small smile.
�I�m good!� I said, putting on a smile and trying to will away the stinging pain in the middle of my stomach that only surfaced when he was around.
�You, uh, celebrating something?� Hayden asked, looking up to my tiara again.
�Yeah�.I�m�uh, getting married,� I said, fiddling with the tiara, suddenly very self conscious.
Hayden�s expression was unreadable. �Well, congratulations then.�
�Thanks�.um, how have you been?� I asked.
�Ya know, here and there�.real busy with work though,� Hayden said, looking down and seeming distracted.
�Yeah, that�s what I hear, good for you,� was all I could think to say.
To say things were awkward would be the understatement of the century.
�Well, it was nice seein� ya,� Hayden said, trying to make a step to slide past me.
�Yeah, you too,� I said dumbly.
He took a step and turned around, ��.be sure to remind that guy how lucky he is,� he said. I stood there, feeling like a child in my veiled tiara as I watched him walk away.
I knew it, I knew it then. I wasn�t over him � not by a long shot. Distance and time had only shielded me because I hadn�t seen him. Now that I had seen him, it was like flood gates. Everything came back to me then � I was filled with memories of how we met, how he asked me out, how we were together�somehow that�s all I could think about. I didn�t even think about the way things ended and how flaky Hayden had been during that time.
I�d like to be able to blame things on my alcohol-induced haze.
I found myself doing something that would surely make me want to kick myself later.
�Hayden!� I called after him.
Hayden heard me and turned around.
�Would you want to get together sometime for lunch, ya know, catch up?� I asked him.
Hayden smiled. �I�d like that. Are you sure, I mean, would your fiance mind?�
I shook my head, �Nah, he�s really understanding.
�Okay, how about I call you?� Hayden asked.
�Sure,� I said, trying to sound non-chalant.
Hayden smiled and walked away.
What are you doing? I was asking myself internally. What is wrong with you?
I knew that I didn�t want to know the answer.
~~~~~
"How could you, Adrienne?!" Susan nearly yelled.
We were all congregated back at my apartment and it was nearly 3AM.
Tara, Jade and Erin just sat quietly, surveying the scene as I had told them of my encounter with Hayden at Guvernment.
"Listen, its really not a big deal, alright? Besides, I'm sure he won't call anyway..."
"That's totally not the point and you know it," Susan said. "Why would you even give him the time of day?"
"Well, it is Hayden Christensen," Erin spoke up.
"Shut up, Erin, you're not helping!" Susan replied.
I just shook my head. "Listen, I've had a lot to drink....I'm not even thinking clearly...it was a lapse in judgment and its not a big deal at all....so please don't make this into something its not."
Susan just looked at me.
She was very protective, bordering on overprotective at times. Pairing that with her disdain for Hayden made for a very unpleasant combination.
I went upstairs to change out of the clothes I had worn out. They were smelling of cigarette smoke and vodka (I had had a not so smooth spill at the end of the night)
All I wanted to do was crawl into bed and pretend I hadn't seen Hayden -- and pretend that I hadn't asked him to lunch.
I slept until 1:00pm the next day.
We actually had left the day open in our plans for the continued weekend celebration. We knew how we partied and knew we'd need recovery time.
I checked my phone when I woke up, almost surprised that Todd hadn't called a single time.
He was good for giving me space with the girls when I needed it.
He's the right one for me...he just is, I convinced myself internally.
I got up to go to the living room to see what everyone else was up to.
Erin and Jade were playing a game on my PlayStation and Susan was sitting with Tara on the porch, drinking coffee.
I walked outside and sat in the porch swing.
"Hey sleepyhead," Tara smiled. "We were wondering if you were going to wake up..."
I grinned, "you guys remember? I used to live like this on the weekends in college."
Susan hadn't said a word the entire time. After a minute, as if on cue, Tara got up and walked back in the apartment, leaving us out there alone.
"So, are you hungover?" I asked.
"Nope," she said, looking out over the lawn.
"I wanted to thank you for everything last night - it was a perfect evening for a bachelorette," I grinned.
"Yeah, are you gonna throw that 'last fling' in there too, for good measure?" she asked, looking at me.
"Excuse me?" I said, now getting very angry - she was taking this too far.
"Well, you can't honestly expect me to think that you wouldn't sleep with Hayden again if he wanted to," Susan said.
I narrowed my eyes at her. "That is not fair and you know it...."
"No, I'll tell you what's not fair -- there's a guy across town who loves you and wants to marry you - yet who do we end up talking about by the end of the evening of your bachelorette party?....who we always talk about -- Hayden!"
I shook my head, "if you honestly think that I would cheat on Todd, then you really don't know me at all."
"I know who you are and I love who you are...but who you are around Hayden scares me," Susan said bluntly. "He has this inane power over you -- I've seen it a thousand times and I saw it again last night....he could get your life back into a mess real quick if you let him."
"Well, I wouldn't let him anyway, so that's irrelevant...so let's just let it be and enjoy the rest of this weekend," I said quickly, regretting that I had ever told Susan I had run into him.
Somehow, she had managed not to see him and it hadn't even been mentioned until we had gotten back to my apartment.
I knew there was no use arguing anymore and got up to walk back into the apartment.
I went upstairs to check my phone -- no call from Todd. There was a text message. I smiled, thinking that Todd had sent me a greeting.
I flipped open my phone to find a strange number that looked oddly familiar.
"How's lunch, Tuesday, 12 at Ferillo?"
I gasped in surprise. The text was a lunch invite from Hayden.
So, now the ball was in my court, so to speak....and I didn't have the slightest clue what I should do.