Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  You don't have to have a Maltese background to impress a Maltese family. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  You should know that Popeye, Cutthroat Island and parts of The Gladiator were filmed in Malta. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  Maltesers were not invented in Malta. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  Maltese terriers actually were first bred in Malta. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  The Maltese Cross is a throwback from the days of the Knights of Malta. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  The Maltese Falcon never existed in Malta. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you don't eat fish, hate swimming and soccer, hate Elvis and don't like fishing you will need to find another way to impress a Maltese dad - good luck ! 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you are not good with dinner table manners, a Maltese mum will be highly unamused - and above all, do not fart or burp anywhere around her (unless you are close family !) 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  Maltese do believe in the evil eye. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  No point in having a debate on the merits of turning Jehovah Witness, or being Muslim, 99.9% of Maltese are Catholic. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  You won't need a translator, most Maltese speak English well and you will never forget a Maltese accent. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you are an accountant, or fashion designer you will greatly impress your Maltese mother-in-law. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you run your own business, your Maltese father-in-law will be very impressed. 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you are invited to a Maltese gathering get familiar with the likes of qassatat, pastizzi, figolli, cannoli and qaq tal ahsel.
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you are Catholic but you weren't confirmed and didn't do your communion, don't mention it !
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  Most Maltese take exception if you say "I've heard Malta is like Italy or Greece isn't it?", frankly, it ain't.
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you are over 22 and not married, a Maltese grandmother will think you must have some sort of physical problem or disease.
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you can crochet make a doily for your Maltese mother-in-law and watch your status grow !
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you don't understand how to gamble on horses, play bingo, or play poker you won't get on a Maltese grandfather's good side.
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you don't know what Kinnie is, find out !
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you hate to talk, you better be good at listening !
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  Expect to put on one kilo for every Maltese gathering you have attended in any one year.
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  Most Maltese grandmothers think jeans are for poor people - so don't be prancing around wearing your $200 vintage Levi's 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  If you restored a 1960's Ford the whole family will be impressed.
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  Know your Maltese celebs …..Edward De Bono, (lateral thinking), S2S (music), Joe Camilleri (music), Darren Gauci (jockey), Sean Micallef (comedian), Kevin Muscat (soccer), Dan Paris (actor), Steven Zammit (ex-YTT), Amber Valletta (model), Jeff Fenech, (boxer). 
Guide to Getting to know the MALTESE:  Finally, not all Maltese live in Sunshine, and St Albans, have chickens in their backyards, have a brother named Charlie who fishes a lot, own a Maltese terrier and a restored Ford…..but, some do ! 


