Las Lomas High School Class of 71, Debbi Purcell Harris

Debbi Purcell Harris

	Here I am.	My Life Today I'm still living locally. My husband Greg (Del Valle, class of 1970) and I have been married since 1973, thirty-five years in August 2008. Greg works for Siemens Oncology Systems. We have 2 children. My daughter Lisa will be 28 in November of 2008 and my son RJ will be 33 in April 2009. I stay home and care for my son, RJ, who is considered severely handicapped with Down Syndrome and Autism. I' ve been using a computer and been on line for many years. I learned to use Adobe Photoshop (by trial and error) to create computer art and graphics, and have also enjoyed learning to create websites using basic html (no high tech stuff) and my own designs and simple animations. It has been great for me to have this creative outlet since 'my world' is pretty small and restricted. I don't get out and socialize much since RJ's schedule is my schedule and that changes all the time. I love it that I have had the chance to create this website. The best part has been hearing from and about our classmates after all these years. Everyone is unique and interesting and just as OLD as I am. This area has grown and changed and it does have some major draw backs (like incredible traffic and gigantic buildings) but I still love it, especially in the spring. My kids were born here and we all grew up as a family here, it's our home.	This is my husband, Greg.

This is Lisa.	Lisa graduated from Las Lomas in 1999 and graduated from the University of California, San Diego in 2003. She majored in human development with a minor in linguistics and earned BA degrees in both.Then she went on to UC Davis, earned her teaching credentials and Masters Degree in Education a year and a half later. She changed direction after substitute teaching and took a job working for Siemens.Since Siemens is a German based international corporation she has had the chance to travel,use the German, French and Italian languages that she studied and enjoys her work. No Mom could love and appreciate a daughter more than I love and appreciate Lisa. From the day she was born she brought a special spirit and light into our family that has blessed us all. She may not be perfect but she was perfect for us! She is lovely, sweet, smart and has a great sense of humor. Even though she is the baby of the family she has always been a wonderful 'big sister' to RJ and the best friend he has ever had. He misses her living at home but delights in hearing her over the telephone and she visits often since she lives local again(I feel the same way). Helping Lisa grow up helped me grow and I learned so much from her life and her education. I found I was interested in subjects that had put me to sleep in the past (History, Sociology, Literature, Psychology). Thanks to her I got to sew little smocked dresses, be a Girl Scout leader, make princess and angel costumes, buy lots of Barbie dolls, and take many Mom/Daughter trips (several to Disneyland and a very special one for me to New England to show her where I lived when I was a little girl). She allowed me to be a Mom and a friend to her and her friends and to know and appreciate her generation and their challenges. She will feel awkward about me saying these things since she is very modest but she truly has been a constant source of joy in my life.

This is Lisa.

Lisa graduated from Las Lomas in 1999 and graduated from the University of California, San Diego in 2003. She majored in human development with a minor in linguistics and earned BA degrees in both.Then she went on to UC Davis, earned her teaching credentials and Masters Degree in Education a year and a half later.

She changed direction after substitute teaching and took a job working for Siemens.Since Siemens is a German based international corporation she has had the chance to travel,use the German, French and Italian languages that she studied and enjoys her work.

No Mom could love and appreciate a daughter more than I love and appreciate Lisa. From the day she was born she brought a special spirit and light into our family that has blessed us all. She may not be perfect but she was perfect for us! She is lovely, sweet, smart and has a great sense of humor. Even though she is the baby of the family she has always been a wonderful 'big sister' to RJ and the best friend he has ever had. He misses her living at home but delights in hearing her over the telephone and she visits often since she lives local again(I feel the same way).

Helping Lisa grow up helped me grow and I learned so much from her life and her education. I found I was interested in subjects that had put me to sleep in the past (History, Sociology, Literature, Psychology). Thanks to her I got to sew little smocked dresses, be a Girl Scout leader, make princess and angel costumes, buy lots of Barbie dolls, and take many Mom/Daughter trips (several to Disneyland and a very special one for me to New England to show her where I lived when I was a little girl). She allowed me to be a Mom and a friend to her and her friends and to know and appreciate her generation and their challenges. She will feel awkward about me saying these things since she is very modest but she truly has been a constant source of joy in my life.

	RJ is a very special and interesting man. Living with him and caring for him all these years has been a very challenging and enlightening but amazing experience. He has multiple handicapping conditions but for the first half of his life we only recognized Down's Syndrome (commonly associated with developmental delays or what we all used to call retardation) as his challenge. In reality that was the least pervasive condition he had to deal with. His Autism, internal seizures (we believe he has Landau Kleffner Syndrome) and Tourette's Syndrome (he is now non-verbal so we don't get the obscenities) have been far more difficult to cope with on a daily basis. Most recently his sleep disorders have become a very challenging factor in all our lives. RJ needs assistance with all daily activities; bathing, dressing, toileting, eating ect... and constant supervision. Greg and I provide this care. It has been virtually impossible to arrange for anyone else to come in and help (other than Lisa when she is home) for many years now. RJ likes to ride in the car, listen to music and make elaborate designs on the floor lining up colorful toys. He is ambulatory. He doesn't speak anymore (last words around 6 years old) but understands most of what is said to and around him. He has behavioral challenges as a result of his many frustrations and discomforts. I know this doesn't make RJ sound like a dream child, probably more like a nightmare but the other side of it all is that there isn't a more pure spirit anywhere. When RJ is inclined and can manage it, a hug from him is like a hug from heaven (pure love) and well worth the struggles.	This is RJ

Life with RJ has been almost mind altering. The world looks a lot different when you share it closely with someone that is constantly challenged either physically, socially or emotionally or all of them at once, like RJ is. You learn things that you can't really learn any other way.

Sometimes the lessons have been very painful (especially as a parent). There are few things more painful than knowing and watching your child hurt and suffering and not having the power to change that. Sometimes the lessons have been very profound. Like finding joy in the least likely places and in the simplest accomplishments and a deep appreciation for a few brief but peaceful moments. Finding kindness and compassion in other people that you wouldn't ordinarily see gives you a different perspective about everyone.

Learning that no matter how hard you fight for your loved ones 'rights' you're lucky to come out on top a quarter of the time is hard to accept but you get so you're grateful for any minor victory. Nothing your challenged loved one does is as difficult to deal with as being harmed by and trying to work with societies system's that are supposedly set up to serve them and you. Yet you have to realize that things are better than they were in the past and hope it continues to improve in the future.

RJ has been a pioneer in a lot of cases in his lifetime. He was in the first group of handicapped kids to get public education services at age 3 (now they start them at a few weeks). After RJ suffered with ear infections that caused devastating problems because Down's kids often have ear canals that prevent doctors from viewing their ear drums it became standard practice at Kaiser, for all Down's kids to have tympana grams to detect middle ear fluid.

RJ was in the first class of severely handicapped kids to attend school on the Indian Valley Elementary School (RJ's home school) campus instead of on an isolated site with only handicapped peers. That class was a hugh success largely because of the great principal at the time (Mr. Bartlett) and the teachers (one of our classmates, Sandy Harvey was one of them) but mostly because of the great kids there.

RJ was the first severely handicapped student in the Acalanes School District to attend school at Las Lomas High School (his home school) as an 'inclusion student' instead of segregated in a handicapped classroom. That wasn't an especially successful program but as far as civil rights and progress in concept, it was a step forward.

Well this is getting way too long so I will stop, except to say, RJ has been one of my greatest teachers in matters of life and spirituality. He is and has been one of my greatest blessings.

A Short History of the last 30 Years

It's been more good than bad, more happy than sad! I wish it hadn't gone by so quickly.

Future Plans

I'd like to keep on living, learning, laughing and enjoying the ups and downs for a while longer.

What I've Learned the last 30 years

Some senses are worth cultivating:
A sense of humor~
A sense of wonder~
A sense of well-being (you could call it Hope or Faith)~
They can mean the difference between happiness and misery.

Message to My Classmates

Thanks to all of you who have been willing to send in your profile forms and share your stories with the rest of us. I believe we have a wonderful group of interesting and special people in our class. Each one of us is important, valuable and unique. Our paths over the last 30 some years are diverse....[starts swaying and bursts into a heartfelt rendition of: We are the World, We are the Children...] Sorry, a momentary lapse into my typical extremely sentimental, sappy nature. I do think we were fortunate to have shared time together then and to reunite or in some cases get aquainted now. I hope the rest of you will consider sharing your stories as well.
The 50 year school celebration and our 30 year class reunion were fun for all. Most didn't want to go home. We may do a multi class reunion next but if not a 40 year in 2011 for sure. Even if you can't attend you are still a part of our history and can connect with us here on the incredible World Wide Web. L A, L A, L A S L, O M, O M, O M A S.....you know the rest don't you?

My Favorite Quote

I love quotes, here are three of my favorites...

We live very close together. So our prime purpose in this life is to help others.
And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them.
DALAI LAMA

The smallest ACTION is worth far more than the grandest of intentions.
unknown

We are the Hands of Heaven on earth.
unknown

Other Comments

This is one of my only "public" claims to fame. It may seem silly but it has brought me a lot of happiness and I love it.
Thanks to RJ's strange sleeping patterns I had many long nights awake and would spend some of those hours on the computer. I discovered I could create fun graphics to share with other other internet users that were building websites. I was also able to use these skills on a private level as a freelance artist to help with the family income.
batelf_b2.GIF (43k)

These are a few of the fantasy characters that I created for my Wonderflight website. I have lots of sparkling starry graphics, angels and fairies, backgrounds and a section where you can pick up a magical message (little thoughts I made up with quotes I liked at the end). I created the website a couple of years ago and started out with about 25 pages of graphics which grew over time to about 130 pages. I've had visitors from all over the US and the world. It's been fun to hear from so many people and see my stuff all over the web. Over the years I've had well over 2 million hits on those pages... who would've thought!? You make a lot of friends when you work for free. :)
magicball_w.gif (11k)

[email protected]
My free graphics website
WonderFlight
Even if you're not interested in web graphics, if you're having a blah day, think about picking up a Magical Message!
WonderFlight Magical Messages

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Please send information, suggestions, corrections, submissions to:
Deb (Purcell) Harris
[email protected]
If you would rather use snail mail or if you need picture scans, send to the following address:
Deb Harris
PO Box 1153
Alamo, CA
94507-1153

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Debbi Purcell Harris

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