"I told you; Halloween costumes," Methos said irritably as he perused the racks of clothing.

"I already have mine. Sheeza asked me to do 'smudgy kilt-boy' and pacem and hayden thought it was a good idea as well."

"Couldn't come up with anything more original?" Methos sniped.

Duncan shrugged while Connor grinned. Richie stood a couple of feet away, eyeing a Hobbit costume.

"So, what are you planning on, Connor?" Richie asked.

"Let me guess," Methos cut in snidely. "Tarzan again?"

"The girls seem to like it."

"Ha! You just want MacNair and Sharz to offer to play Jane again."

"Actually, I was hoping they'd offer to swing from my vine."

Richie dissolved into laughter as Methos and Duncan rolled their eyes.

"I thought you were going as a highwayman, Methos. Isn't that what you said last week?" Connor asked.

"Yeah, right," Methos snorted. "Not after I got caught trying it on."

Duncan and Connor exchanged glances, humor lighting their eyes. "Um...what happened?" Connor asked, trying to stifle his laughter.

Pulling out a Spiderman costume, shuddering, and immediately putting it back, Methos continued looking, sighing heavily. "I tried the damned thing on, lahoffy saw and insisted I had to creep in through her window and 'ravish the innocent maiden' while wearing the bloody thing."

"But, her room is on the third floor--" Duncan began, only to be interrupted by Connor's bark of laughter.

"'Innocent maiden?� That halo's tarnished for a reason!"

"I believe I tried pointing out both those facts. Silly wench. Damned near broke my bloody neck." Once again, Connor fell into a fit of laughter while Duncan hid a smile behind his hand at the aggrieved tone of his friend's voice. "There's always the �Greek slave boy.� That one fits you quite nicely."

Methos paused in his rummaging and shot a glare over his shoulder. "Not funny, MacLeod. Why does everyone insist I'm Greek?"

"The nose?" Richie piped in.

"Laugh riot today, aren't you? If I were Greek, why in hell would I talk with an English accent?"

"Because you're a master of deception? The king of chameleons? The--"

"MacLeod! I'll have you know this is my real voice! Bloody hell, I even moan with an accent."

"And that was just a bit too much information, old man." Duncan winced, the mental image that accompanied that statement giving him the shudders.

Methos smirked. "Ooh, here's a lovely one."

"You'd look awfully silly, wouldn't you? French maid?"

"Not for me, you Scottish oaf! For lahoffy!"

"Tad sexist, isn't it?"

"Oh and 'naked slave boy' isn't?" Methos asked, shoving the costume back onto the rack.

Duncan had no answer.

Connor gave up and sank to the floor, laughing.

Richie muttered something about "old-timers not appreciating a good thing when they had it."

Methos glared at all three.

"Tell me again why we do these things?" Methos demanded as he threw his hands up in frustration.

"Because it's what our ladies want. And we enjoy making them happy."

"'Live to serve', my bloody ass. I thought that's what they were supposed to do for me. Whatever happened to the good old days?" Methos muttered.

Duncan shook his head, saying nothing. The old man was working himself up into one of his world-class snits. Best to let him rant and get it out of his system.

"I mean, the silly git actually thinks she can boss me around like I'm...I'm some sort of play toy that has nothing better to do than please her and her every whim."

"This is a problem how?" Richie asked puzzled.

Connor blinked in surprise. "Silly git? Where on earth did that come from?"

"Damn show she makes me watch. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She has a thing for that lame vampire named Spike. He talks like that, I suppose it's rubbing off." Methos paused, his eyes lighting up. "That's it!"

"What's it?" Duncan asked, confused at the sudden change of topic and a little leery of the gleam in his friend's eye.

"She wants vampires? Wants fangy-boy Spike? Then I'll just give it to her. I'll do Spike."

"Methos? Doesn't he uh...have bleached blond hair?" Richie pointed out.

"What's your point, Ryan? If I can do cute, I can do blond. That settles it, Spike it is. Now, I'll just have to get her to do Buffy."

"So she can stake you when she sees what you've done to your hair?" Richie asked with wide eyes. Methos? BLOND????

"Wasn't the bald image enough? The girls are still shuddering over that one."

"Which if you hadn't listened to that damned peacock, no one would have ever known about it!"

"Ramirez talks, I listen." Connor said, shrugging.

Duncan shook his head. He wondered if he should tell Methos that he already knew lahoffy was coming as Buffy. Perhaps tell him that she and Ennaj had been in the garage the past couple of days making a replica of "Mr. Pointy", Buffy's favorite stake?

Chuckling softly, he decided the answer was no.

Happy Halloween everyone!

lahoffyCDC
October 31, 2002

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