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I had moved back to London after being away for four years, I've lived in three different countries, I was born in Dublin where I lived till I was 12 then I moved to London when my father's job sent him there. Then when I was 15 he started up his own business and we moved to New York.
I am now 19 and I decided to go back to live in London for good. Catherine was my best friend from the moment I started at the new
secondary school and we've been best friends ever since. We now share a house in Chelsea in London. Catherine is taking me to some boyband concert, I haven't heard of this band before but Catherine keeps telling me about them, one good thing they're Irish, Irish people are always friendly at least.
`Gabs come on we're going to be late for the concert�hurry up.' Shouted Catherine.
`Awww Catherine I'm hurrying but you know I don't want to go.' `Yeah but you agreed to come didn't you?'
`Yeah only cause it's your birthday and I didn't want you spending it on your own.' I said coming down the stairs.
We went outside and got into my car and left for Wembley. `Gabs there's something I haven't actually told you.' Said Cat quietly.
`What's that?' I asked. `Well last week I entered a competition to get backstage passes to meet Westlife and I won. We have to have dinner with them tonight and the prize was to spend 2 weeks with them in London while they're on the promotion of My Love.' She explained. `You are joking Cat.'
`No, you don't mind do you?'
`Suppose not, but you owe me big.' I said and smiled. When we arrived at Wembley there were posters all around for Westlife, then I saw Bryan's face in the poster. I was so shocked I was frozen to the spot, Bryan had been my friend in Dublin since I was 3 we lived next door to each other. Even now we still kept in touch, he said he was in a band but I had no idea it was the famous band Catherine constantly went on about. Cat went off to buy a program. Suddenly my phone rang.
`Hey Gabs, it's Bry.' Said a friendly voice.
`Hey how are yous?' I replied.
`Great, just wish we could meet up, I haven't seen you in like seven years Gabs.' `Maybe we'll see each other sooner than you think.'
`What do you mean, you're in New York.' `No I'm not I arrived in London yesterday. My best friend has dragged me to some concert and I am standing next to four foot picture of your face right now.' I said laughing. `You mean you're at Wembley.'
`Yep.' `Go to the backstage entrance the security guard will let yous in.' `Catherine won some competition to meet yous after the show and have dinner with you and stay with yous for the next two weeks.'
`This is so cool, just like old times Gabs.' `Yeah definitely, I'll see yous after the show and good luck.'
`I'll keep and eye out for yous, see you.' Catherine came back and we made our way to our seats, it turned out we were front row centre the two middle seats in front of the guys.
When they came on stage Bryan looked down and smiled. Four other guys came out, and I was instantaneously drawn to one of them who said he was called Shane. He had deep hazel eyes and the most gorgeous smile, but I was fixed on Bry for much of the concert. `Well Wembley this is our final song and I'd like to dedicate it to Gabs a friend of mine who I haven't seen in a long time. This is My Love.' Bryan said and smiled at me.
I looked at him and smiled back. Once it was finished Cat and I went backstage to meet the band, I still hadn't told Cat about Bry and I didn't know how either. The security guard led us to a room where laughter was coming from. He opened the door and Catherine went in and I followed. She saw Kian and she froze, I was a few paces behind her, and I heard a squeal.
`Gabs oh I've really missed you.' Said Bryan running and hugging me. `I missed you too Bry.'
`God have you changed. What happened to your bob hair cut and the braces?' He said smiling. `I grew my hair and got rid of the braces.' I said laughing. `Like DOH!' He said and hugged me again. `How rude of me, let me introduce you.' He said.
`Ok.' I replied. `Yeah trust Bryan to keep the beautiful girl to himself.' Said Nicky smiling.
`Shut it Nix. Gabs do you remember Nix, he was in our class the year you left.' `What Nicholas Byrne?' `Yeah that's me alright. Gabriella Sidoli no�it can't be you. Bry is right you have changed.' He said hugging me. `So have you.' I said smiling.
`Anyway this is Kian, he always smiles the wind blew one day and his face stayed like that, that deutz staring at yous is Shane and that in the corner is Mark.' Said Bry laughing. `Nice to meet you all.' I said shaking hands. `Nice to meet you too.' Said Shane shaking my hand. `Shane is the one I told you all those stories about.' Said Bryan smirking.
`What stories? I knew I shouldn't share with Bryan.' Said Shane. `I think the less said the better.' I said and smiled at Bryan. Shane went red. `And this is?' Said Kian. `Oh sorry this is Catherine my best friend.' `Hey.' They all said. Cat didn't reply. `Sorry she's still a bit star struck.' I said and punched her arm. She snapped out of it. `Hi.' She mumbled. `Let's go to dinner, I'm starving.' Said Mark.
We went out to the back entrance of Wembley and there were two cars waiting. Kian, Catherine got into one car and it sped off and Nix, Bry, Shane and I got into the remaining car. Shane sat at the front and I sat in between Nix and Bry. `God has it been a long time since us three were together.' Said Nicky. `Yeah I know, the last time was the night before you left, remember the whole class threw you a party and we all ended up playing spin the bottle.' `Yeah that was the worst night of my life.' I said laughing. `Why was that?' Asked Shane. `First of all it was the first time I had got drunk and my head was killing me and second of all I ended up kissing Nix and Bry.' `Hey it wasn't that bad.' Said Nix. `Yeah you were the envy of the whole school they all wanted to kiss us two.' `It wasn't that bad then cause I didn't know any better.' I said laughing. Bryan and Nicky looked at me. `Hey I was only joking guys I'm sorry.' Shane was laughing at their faces. `It's ok you put up with enough of our jokes didn't yous over the years.' Said Bry. `We forgive yous.' Said Nix hugging me. We arrived at the restaurant and the place was empty except for a circular table in the middle. Kian, Catherine and Mark were already sitting down chatting like old friends. Shane sat next to Kian, I sat next to Shane and Bryan and Nix sat the other side of me. The evening went by really quickly, Nicky, Mark and Bryan were drunk so the driver took them back to the hotel, leaving Shane, Kian, Catherine and I at the restaurant. `Hey guys fancy a walk?' Asked Kian. `Sure that'd be nice.' Said Catherine. They got up and left, Shane looked at me and I looked at him. `Do you want to come for a walk too?' He asked nervously. `Sure that'd be cool.' I said smiling. He reached out his hand and helped me up from my seat. We went for a walk along the river with our arms linked. `Are you cold?' He asked. `A little.' I replied quietly. `Here.' He said putting his jacket around me. `But you'll be cold.' I said concerned he'd get ill. `No you can keep me warm.' He said smiling his gorgeous smile. He put his arm around me and I put mine around him. `See I told you.' He said. We just walked by the river and chatted for ages, then we walked back to the hotel where we met Kian and Catherine. `Hi we wondering where you two were?' Said Kian. `We just went for a walk.' Said Shane pulling his arm away from mine. `I was going to take Catherine home, are you coming Gabs?' Asked Kian. `Yeah sure. Thanks for your jacket Shane.' I said handing it back to him. Before he had the chance to say anything else the three of us got into Kian's car and drove off, Shane just stood there looking at the back of the car. Kian dropped us at our house and he said he'd call tomorrow. I still didn't get Shane though when we were alone he was great but when he saw Kian he just went cold towards me, weird or what? The following morning the phone rang. `Hello?' I said. `Hey Gabs it's Bry, are you ready we'll come and pick you up?' `You just woke me up Bryan. It's only ten in the morning.' `Are you packed and ready to spend two weeks with your best mate.' `Yep.' `Ok we'll be around in an hour.' I called Catherine and we both started to get ready, exactly an hour later there was a knock at the door. Catherine went to answer it whilst I was in the kitchen making some tea. `Hi Cat where's Gabs?' Said Bryan. `She's just making some tea. Come in.' Said Catherine. Catherine looked behind and there was no Kian only Bryan and Shane. They made their way into the kitchen where I was. `Hey Gabs.' Said Bryan hugging me from behind and making me jump. `Hi Bry, hello Shane.' I said surprised to see him. `Hi.' He said quietly. `Want tea?' I asked. `Yeah thanks.' Said Shane. `Sure.' Added Bryan. Then the phone rang. Catherine answered and called me, it was for me. `Ooh Lover Boy's on the phone.' Said Bryan laughing. `Shut it Bry.' I said and went to take the call. `Who was it?' Said Bry to Catherine. `Richard.' She replied simply. `You mean Richard�Richard.' `Yep.' Then they heard me shouting down the phone, then I came back in. `Gabs are you ok?' Asked Shane. `Yeah fine thanks, I just can't stand two faced people.' `Gabs is he still bothering you? Do you want me to go and sort him out?' Asked Bryan. `No I think he kind of got the message this time. If he didn't he must be stupid.' `It'll be ok.' Said Bryan. Catherine and I went upstairs and Shane and Bryan were talking downstairs. `So what happened with that Richard guy?' Shane asked. `He cheated on Gabs and she caught him a few months back. She's been a weary of getting close to anyone since and what's making it worse is that he won't leave her alone.' Added Bryan. Shane told Bryan what had happened. `So why did you do that, she probably thinks you don't like her Shane.' `I don't know I do like her a lot Bryan but I think I really upset her. What shall I do?' Said Shane. `Give it time.' Said Bryan. Catherine and I came down with our suitcases. `I told you they'd bring the whole house Shane. Good job we brought two cars.' Said Bryan laughing. `Hey.' I said poking him. Shane picked up my cases and put them into a silver BMW and Bryan put Catherine's into a black Mercedes. I decided that I should make an effort with Shane to be friends for the sake of everyone else. `See you at the hotel.' Said Bryan and Catherine getting into the Mercedes. Shane and I were left standing on the pavement. He went over to the car and opened the door for me. `There you go ma'am.' He said bowing and smiling. `Why thank you.' I said curtsying. We got in the car and laughed. `Gabs, we've got the day off today and I was kind of wondering if you'd like to come riding with me?' Asked Shane nervously. I thought for a moment and thought that I should give this friends thing a go at least although I wanted more. `Sure I'd like that.' I said and smiled. We chatted all the way to the hotel and then Catherine and I unpacked. At twelve everyone was sitting in Shane and Bryan's room deciding what to do for the day. `Well Catherine and I are going shopping.' Said Kian. `Ok what about the rest of us? How about going sight seeing?' Said Bryan. `Yeah cool.' Said Nicky and Mark nodded in agreement. `Gabs, Shane you coming?' Asked Bryan. `Erm no sorry Bry we're going riding.' Said Shane smiling at me. I smiled back and nodded. `Ok we'll see yous all later then.' Everyone went there separate ways and Shane and I headed towards the car, we drove to the stables. `Before we go riding I thought we could have a picnic. Is that ok?' Asked Shane. `Yeah sure.' We sat in a field all alone just chatting away happily together, the more we talked the more I realised that Shane was to become a great friend of mine. We talked about everything and anything I felt so at ease with him and since Richard I had not been this happy. We rode for a couple of hours then we headed back to the hotel where the others were getting ready for a night out. `Gabs you coming we're gonna hit the clubs tonight.' Said Nicky. `Yeah cool, I just have to go get ready.' `Well mate you'll be waiting a couple of hours for Gabs.' Said Bryan laughing. `Hey Mcfadden watch it.' I said pointing at him. `Did I mention that you're so worth waiting for.' He said trying to get back in my good books. `Ok you're forgiven.' I replied laughing. `So whose coming?' Asked Bryan. `Me and you and Gabs.' Said Nicky. `What about you Shane?' Asked Bryan. `No I think I'll stay in tonight thanks, a hot bath and a movie is fine for me.' He said and sat down. `Gabs we'll meet you here in a half hour ok?' Said Nicky. `Sure Nix.' I said and with that I went to get ready. Half an hour later I returned wearing a black skirt, a red and black top and black high heel shoes. Bryan and Nicky were already pacing up and down by the door waiting. `Hey Gabs, look Nix told yous she was worth waiting for.' Said Bryan. `You look gorgeous Gabs.' Said Nicky. `Yeah woohoo. I think I'll come too.' Said Mark smiling. Shane just stared at Gabs thinking how beautiful she was and that she could have been his had he had the courage to tell her how he felt� and her legs�wow he thought. `We'd better go.' Said Bryan. `See you guys later.' I said and we left. Bryan, Nicky and I went to a pub for a few drinks and then we went to some clubs. The next morning Nicky and I arrived back at eight. Bryan had come home earlier with a head ache and Nicky and I preceded to go to every club in London practically. The rest of the guys were having breakfast when we came in. `Well isn't it nice of yous two to join us.' Said Mark. `Shut it Mark.' Said Nicky holding his head with one hand and my hand with the other. `I see you ditched Bry, so you two could be alone.' Added Kian. `How was your evening Shane? Good bath and movie?' Asked Nicky. `Yeah it was actually.' `Man would you have liked to be with us last night. We met up with some of Gabs' mates and went to practically every club in London.' Said Nicky looking proud. `We have to leave for nine, you and Catherine too Gabs.' Said Shane. `Yeah you're a bit quiet aren't you?' Asked Mark. `Sore head.' I whispered and disappeared into the room I shared with Catherine. Nicky has taken me on a surprise holiday to Sydney for two weeks.`Gabs there's something I want to ask you?' He started.`Ok you know you can tell me anything Nicky.' I said holding his hand.`Gabs we've been together for two years now and I know that I loveyou and I wondered will you marry me?' He asked getting down on one knee. `Of course I will. I love you too Nicky.' I said and kissed him. `Gabs there's something else I have to tell you. A few weeks ago Iwent to the hospital with those headaches�well they found out�I�have�a�brain tumour.' He said and he started crying. `Yeah but they can operate can't they Nix?' I said holding him and Ibegan crying too. `No they can't they've given me two months to live Gabs.' `Oh Nix.' I said holding him tightly. `I'll completely understand if you don't want to get married.' He said. `No Nicky I love you and I don't care what happens we'll get through this together, I still want to marry you.' I said and we kissed. Nicky and I got married in Sydney the following week, nobody knew about it not even the lads or our families. We flew back to Dublin and he knew he had to face the lads. First he told his family and then he had to tell them. We were all sitting in the house Nicky and I bought in Dublin. `Hey Nix why are we all here for a party?' Said Bryan laughing. `I wish mate.' Nicky replied. `The reason Nicky and I brought you all here tonight was to�' I stopped and Nicky took my and hand and kissed it and carried on. `When Gabs and I were in Sydney a few weeks ago we got married.' Said Nicky smiling. `Congratulations, mate now you can have a long and happy life together like Sarah and I.' Said Shane hugging us both. As soon as he said that I felt the tears well up in my eyes, Nicky hugged me and I blinked away the tears. Everyone began congratulating us and then Nicky stood up again. `This isn't the only reason that I wanted you all here tonight. I don't know how to begin, so I'll just start from the beginning. About six weeks ago I had been getting bad head aches and so I went to the doctor who sent me to the hospital.' `Ok Nix carry on.' Said Kian. `And they got the results, turns out that I have a�a�a�brain tumour� and they gave me two months to live.' He finished and he just hugged me as I burst into tears again. Everyone was silent nobody knew what to say. Then we all had a massive group hug because no-one could believe what they had just heard. `Now I've told yous all I want things to go on as normal, nothing different, just like before agreed?' Said Nicky. `Agreed.' Everyone said. The guys were on a tour of the UK and Ireland and it continued. I had been feeling a bit odd for a few weeks so I went to the doctors, he did some tests and told me he'd call me with the results. We were in London when my phone rang. I picked it up and it was the doctor telling me I was six months pregnant. `How come I didn't know before?' I asked amazed. `Some people just don't realise. You must come for a scan as soon as possible.' He said. I put the phone down and sat there thinking how Nicky would take the news. The guys came back from rehearsals. `Gabs are you ok?' Asked Nicky scooping me up in his arms. `Yeah I got a phone call from the doctor, I'm six months pregnant.' I whispered to him. `That's great. I'm gonna be a daddy. Yah!' He screamed. Everyone turned round to face him. `Did I hear right?' Asked Sarah. `Yeah.' I said smiling. `That's wonderful congratulations Gabs.' She said hugging me. `Actually we've got some news of our own.' Said Shane looking at Sarah lovingly. `Yeah well I'm expecting too, only three months though.' She said hugging Shane. `That's great congratulations.' Said Nicky. `Yeah, congratulations.' I said hugging them both.
The following week I went to London to visit my cousin who had just had triplets, I was only to be gone three days and the day before I was to fly back to Rome to meet Nicky and the other guys I got an unexpected phone call from Mark. `Hello.' I said answering the phone. `Hi Gabs, it's Mark.' He said solemnly. `What's the matter?' I asked knowing something was wrong. `There was an err�accident a few hours ago�a�a�car crash.' `Is everyone ok?' I asked starting to get scared. `No things are really bad I think you should come over immediately. I can't tell you over the phone, I have to see you in person Gabs, it's the local hospital in Rome, I'm sorry.' He said putting down the phone. Immediately I put the phone down and booked a flight to Rome, I packed and left an hour later, within two hours I was outside the hospital in Rome. All I saw was Mark and Kian sitting outside in the corridor with their heads in their hands. I went towards them walking slowly, they looked up and saw me and I saw they had been crying. `Gabs you were quick.' Said Mark trying to smile. `What's happened Mark where's Nicky and Bryan and Shane and Catherine and Sarah?' `They were in a car accident Gabs. Bryan and Sarah died there and then, there was nothing they could do.' `What Bryan can't be dead he's my best friend, you have to be wrong and Sarah can't be either, she was pregnant.' I said and I burst into tears. `I'm sorry Gabs, it's true, Catherine is at the hotel resting, from shock.' `Where's Nicky? I have to see him.' `He's in theatre they are operating on his heart, it stopped several times on the way here, they think the tumour has spread, they are surprised he survived this long.' `No Kian please tell me that this is all a bad dream.' I said shaking my head. `There's something else Gabs, Shane is in a coma, even if he does wake up they think he's damaged his spine and he may never walk again.' Said Kian hugging me. I cried continuously for the next few hours, then a doctor came out and asked for Mrs. Byrne. I stood up and walked towards him. `Mrs. Byrne I am very sorry but Nicholas doesn't have long left he's just woken up and wants to see you. He'll be dead within the hour I am very sorry.' `No not my Nicky he can't die, I'm going to have our baby he has to be here to see his child.' `Go and spend the time he has left with your husband Mrs. Byrne, once again I am sorry.' I went into Nicky's room, he lay there attached to all these machines, it didn't look like my Nicky at all. I walked towards him and he spoke quietly to me. `Gabs you're here, I thought I wouldn't get to see you before I died, that was my one wish to see you again before I went.' `Nicky I'm here don't worry, I'll always be here for you. I promise.' `I'm sorry I couldn't be here to see the birth of our child, I'm sorry for leaving you Gabs. Bryan, Shane and the others will look after you.' As soon as he mentioned them I began to cry again. `Gabs what's wrong?' He asked embracing me. `Nix, Bryan died at the accident along with Sarah and Shane's in a coma.' I blurted out. `Oh god, Gabs I'm sorry I've let you down, I am leaving you, that was your one fear and I made it come true.' `No that isn't true Nicky, I love you and I never regret one minute of us being together, I wouldn't change anything at all. You know what they say, it's better to have loved and lost�' `�than to never have loved at all.' He finished and I kissed him slowly. Kian and Mark came in and looked at Nicky and I. `Hey guys don't look so miserable you eejits. I don't want yous to be sad, you two have to look after Gabs for me, she needs yous both you're her friends.' `We'll always be here for her Nicky we promise. It's not fair you're too young to die.' Said Kian crying. Mark was silent. `I'm dying for a reason obviously God needs me for a greater job.' He said. `Nicky don't leave me.' I said hugging him. `Bye Kian, Bye Mark, I love you Gabs, always will�our time together was the best�ever. Don't ever forget�' `Bye Nix.' Said Mark quietly. `I won't forget Nicky I promise, I love you too.' With that his hand went limp and he died. I just lay my head on his chest and didn't move for the next six hours. Eventually I got up and I kissed him one last time before they took him away. I went outside and the doctor found me. `Mrs. Byrne I am very sorry about your husband. Mr. Filan condition has not improved, but Mr. Egan and Mr. Feehily wanted me to tell you they were with him.' `Yes thank you.' I said. I went to see Shane and the other two, they were sitting either side of him talking to him. He looked worse than Nicky did. In the space of a few hours I had lost my one of my best friends, my husband and Shane had lost his wife, I couldn't lose Shane as well. The funeral of Nicky and Bryan was the worst. I cried for four weeks straight, they were buried in a joint service in Dublin. Sarah was taken back to New York and buried with her mother. Shane was transferred to Sligo General where he's been for two months. I've been sitting with him every day but still there is no improvement. His family come and visit him really often but nobody seems to think he'll come out of the coma. Mark, Kian, Catherine and I live together in a house in Sligo that we bought, I'm eight and a half months pregnant, everyday I wish that Nicky was here to see his baby but I know that won't happen. One evening we were sitting watching television and I started to get pains, Kian and Catherine had gone out and it was just Mark and I. `Mark�I'm getting the pains.' I shouted. `What pains?' He asked looking at me. `The pains.' I said again. `Ooh God the pains, come on Gabs let's get you to the hospital.' He said and helped me up. We were at the hospital within fifteen minutes, I ended up having twins two baby boys, and Mark was there with me. I called them Nicholas Bryan and Shane Jr. Nicholas. Mark sat there holding the babies. `They're gorgeous Gabs, they've both got Nicky's blue eyes and blonde hair.' `Yeah I know, he'll live on through them.' With that Kian and Catherine came running in through the door. `Gabs�Gabs�Mark�Mark�it's Shane he's awake.' Shouted Kian. `He's what?' I said. `He's awake, he doesn't know about Bryan or Sarah or Nicky, he just wants to see you Gabs.' Said Catherine. `Congratulations, twin boys. Nicky would have been so proud.' The doctor came in and looked at us all and smiled. `Mr. Filan is awake, he wants to see you Mrs. Byrne but I've explained that you can't see him because you just had the babies.' `When can I see him?' I asked. `Once we discharge you on Friday.' `But that's five days away, I have to see Shane.' I said. `I'm sorry but that's impossible you both need to rest.' The doctor said and left. On Friday I was discharged and I took the twins home, Kian and Catherine looked after them whilst I went to visit Shane. The opened the door to his room and he was sitting up chatting to Mark, the doctor called Mark outside. `We still haven't told him about his wife, we told him she was in hospital.' `What yous haven't told him how can you keep that from him.' I said annoyed and I raised my voice. `We wanted you to tell him.' Said the doctor. `That's no excuse.' I shouted back then I went in to see Shane. `Gabs�hey you have no idea how good it is to see you.' He said smiling. He looked so much better than when I had seen him before, I had so much to tell him and I didn't know how. `So I heard you had the babies, twins, I bet Nicky is well chuffed.' He said smiling. When he said that tears came to my eyes. `Yeah I had twin boys, Nicholas Bryan and Shane Nicholas�' `You called one after me, awww that's really sweet, was it Nicky's idea.' Once again tears came to my eyes. `Err�Shane, Nicky wasn't there when the babies were born, he died just after the accident.' I said quietly. `Oh Gabs I'm sorry I had no idea, it was all my fault, I was the one driving, I should have died not Nicky.' He said taking my hand. `It wasn't your fault Shane but that's not it, I have something else to tell you.' `What is it? But can you tell me where Sarah is, they said she was in hospital but they won't let me see her.' `Shay I don't know how to tell you this, they've been lying to you for your own good. They haven't been straight with yous at all.' `What do you mean Gabs, why hasn't Sarah been to see me?' He asked me looking me in the eye. `She�she�died Shane in the car crash.' He looked and me and began sobbing, I hugged him and held him he cried till he couldn't cry anymore. `Is that why Bryan hasn't come to see me, because I killed Nicky? Is he angry? Does he blame me?' `Shane nobody blames you for anything it was an accident. But Bry hasn't been to see you because�' `He died too didn't he.' I nodded. `Oh God, Gabs you must hate me so much, I killed your best friend, your husband and my wife, why couldn't I be the one who died.' He said and he began crying again. `Shane stop blaming yourself I don't hate you, I never could, it wasn't your fault it was something that was supposed to happen, look at me.' He looked up. `Say it wasn't your fault Shane.' `I can't. I wish it was me who was dead.' He said. I got up. `Gabs where are you going?' He asked looking like he was going to cry. `Until you say it isn't your fault I'm leaving, you don't need to feel guilty Shane, after everything I went through these past two months, I lost enough Shane, I prayed every day that you'd get better, whilst you were in here, I couldn't lose you too. I can't face this too Shay�I just�' `Gabs I'm sorry.' He said taking my hand. `I'm being selfish, I just�if it hadn't happened they'd still all be alive, now I'm gonna be alone forever because of me I lost my wife and baby and you lost your husband.' `You won't be alone Shane, we still have each other and Mark, Kian and Catherine.' `You mean you still want to know me?' He asked. `Shane you've always been a friend to me and we'll always be friends, nothing's changed for me.' `Nothing changed for me either Gabs, friends, always.' Shane said hugging me. `Well then, you had just better start getting better and get yourself out of here.' I said smiling. `Yeah and then I can go home. Where are you staying Gabs, aren't you living in Dublin anymore?' He asked curiously. `No quite a lot has changed I live here in Sligo now, we bought a house together.' `Who?' He asked. `Kian, Mark, Catherine and I. I don't know why but at the time it seemed the perfect thing to do, I couldn't stay in Dublin knowing that Nix or Bry weren't going to come through the door.' `Where is it?' `It's the Lodge, you know the big house with the stables.' `Yeah the one near my parent's house. It's massive.' `Yeah well with the four of us and the twins we needed a big house.' `Yeah.' He said sadly. `Shane there's enough room for you come and live there too if you want.' `You mean the other's wouldn't mind?' `I don't care if they mind or not I want you to come.' `Ok.' He said and smiled. Two weeks later Shane was let of hospital and we all set about trying to get our lives back to some sort of normality, if we could. Now that Shane was there things were better, I always had him or Mark to talk to and it was like having an extra two children around sometimes. In the August Kian and Catherine moved out and bought their own house because they got married. And in October much to the surprise of Shane and I, Mark returned from a holiday in the Seychelles announcing he had married Laura an old school friend of his. So it was just Shane, the twins and I left in the house. Shane bought Catherine, Kian and Mark's share of the house and sold his house and we moved in together permanently. ***Five years later*** `Uncle Shane, come and take us horse riding again, please we promise we'll be good.' Asked Nicky. `I don't know Nicky, why don't you and Shaney go and ask mummy.' Said Shane smiling at them. `Mummy isn't here, did you forget she went to visit daddy's grave.'Said Shaney. `Oh yeah I forgot what must she think. Come on kids let's go for a drive.' Shane said picking them both up. They got in the car and he took the twin's to his mum's and then drove to the cemetery. Gabs was there kneeling by Nicky's grave crying. `Gabs�' He said quietly. `What are you doing here Shay?' I asked. `I wanted to see if you were ok?' He asked kneeling down by her. `Yeah I'm fine, where are the twins?' `They're at my mum's, I know it hurts Gabs, it hurts me too. We'll get through this Gabs I promise.' He said and hugged me. `I just miss him so much Shay, I thought that with time it would heal but the longer it is the more I miss him.' `I know I miss Nix too, and Sarah but we have to move on Gabs, we've been doing great.' `Yeah I know we have but I feel guilty, like I'm betraying Nicky's memory, by going out with you Shay. I know I'm not but it feels like that.' `If you need time you know you can have it. I love you and that will never change, Nicky loves you too and he would want you to be happy.' `I know Shay thanks.' I said and smiled faintly. We went back home and over the next few weeks I didn't sleep much debating what I should do, then one night I finally got to sleep� `Gabs�Gabs�wake up it's me Nicky.' I heard a voice call. I looked up and saw Nicky standing at the bottom of my bed smiling with a white light around him. I just stared at him. `Hey what d'you think of my wings, I finally got them and was able to come and see you.' `You look different Nicky.' `I'm happy Gabs and I want you and Shane to be happy too. I'm glad you two are together it's what both Sarah and I want.' `I miss you Nicky.' `I love you Gabs and one day we'll all be together again, but right now you and Shane should be together, I know he makes you happy. I have to go, look after Nicky and Shaney for me.' `Nicky I love you and I'll never forget you.' The light faded and I woke up with a start with Shane standing at the door to my room. He looked at me and smiled. `Shane, Nicky came to visit me.' `Me too.' He replied. `Shane I�I�love you.' I said and got up. `I love you too Gabs.' He said as we kissed.
That was all ten years ago. This time has gone by so quickly, at least I found out that Nicky wanted Shay and me together. Shane and I got married nine years ago now, we have two daughters together, Mae Nicola, who's eight and Nicola Gabriella who's five. When we got married we all became Byrne-Filan as our surname, that was nobody would ever forget Nix. Nicky and Shaney are both the spitting image of Nicky, I never let them forget who their father was, they call Shane, Uncle Shane, and they are so close. Nicola and Mae get on well with their two older brother's we're one big happy family, never did I think by being through so much pain would I gain so much happiness.
Everything that happened, did for a reason. Mark and Laura have two girls, Samantha and Bryanna and Kian and Catherine well they have six children, three boys, Bryan, Jordan and Thomas and three girls, Jessica, Cathy and Kiana. The fifteenth anniversary of the death of Bryan and Nicky, Shane, Mark and Kian released Seasons in the Sun in their memory.
`Good evening Dublin. As you, all know this will be the last time that Westlife ever perform together. We were never the same since Nicky and Bryan died so we decided to do one last thing in their memory.' Said Mark.
`Yeah they were close friends of ours and like brothers and we all miss them a great deal. Westlife:Forever is our last album and it is dedicated to the loving memory of Nicholas Byrne and Bryan Mcfadden. We would like to thank all the fans who supported us through the hard times we've had and everyone who's helped us in making Westlife the most successful band in the world�and to think we were once fobbed off as a one hit wonder�' Said Kian.
`Yeah five Irish pretty boys who couldn't sing and were clones of Boyzone.' Added Mark.
`Seven number one albums later�Ten sell out world tours and 35 number one singles later�' Said Shane.
`We proved them all wrong.' They said together.
`Out of all of us who felt pain for losing them the one person who felt the most pain was my wife Gabs, who lost her best friend and husband. In memory of Nicholas Byrne, Bryan Mcfadden and Sarah Filan, who we lost tragically fifteen years ago, this is our last performance and our last ever single as Westlife Seasons in the Sun.'
`Goodbye to you my trusted friend, we've known each other since we were nine or ten. Together we've climbed hills and trees, learned of love and ABCs skinned our hearts and skinned our knees.' Sang Shane.
`Goodbye my friend it's hard to die when all the birds are singing in the sky, now that spring is in the air, pretty girls are everywhere, think of me and I'll be there.' Mark sang and a tear fell down from his eye.
`We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun. But the hills we climbed were just seasons out of time.'
`Goodbye Papa please pray for me, I was the black sheep of the family, you tried to teach me right from wrong. Too much wine and too much song wonder how I got along.' Sang Shane who was now crying.
`Goodbye papa it's hard to die when all the birds are singing in the sky, now that spring is in the air. Little children everywhere, when you see them I'll be there.' Sang Kian.
`We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun, but the wine and the song like the seasons have all gone. We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun, but the wine and the song like the seasons have all gone.' Everyone all sang together.
`Goodbye Michelle my little one, you gave me love and helped me find the sun. And every time that I was down you'd always come around and get my feet back on the ground.' Sang Kian.
`Goodbye Michelle it's hard to die when all the birds are singing in the sky, now that spring is in the air, with the flowers everywhere I wish we could both be there.' Sang Mark.
`We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun, but the hills that we climbed were just seasons out of time. But the wine and the song like the seasons have all gone. All our lives we had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun, but the hills that we climbed were just seasons in the sun.' They finished and everyone was in
tears. The End |