Lots More Deep Thoughts
Why do we say something is out of
whack? What's a whack?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and
you put your
two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale
bread to
begin with.
When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person
drives a race car not called a racist?
Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make
terrible?
Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the
English language.
Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it
follow
that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys
deranged models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners
depressed?
Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion
stars in
the universe you will believe them but if they tell you a wall
has
wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
What hair color do they put on the drivers licenses of bald men?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly
are the others here for?
No one ever says "It's only a game," when their team is
winning.
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't
zigzag?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from
After eating, do amphibians have to wait
one hour before getting out of the water?
How can there be self-help groups?
If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?
If someone has a mid-life crisis while playing hide and seek,
does he automatically lose because he can't find himself?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself,
is it considered a hostage situation?
Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would
they still grow, but only to be troubled and insecure?
Is there another word for synonym?
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do
"practice"?
When sign-makers go on strike, is anything written on their
picket signs?
When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder
why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
Why isn't there a mouse-flavored cat food?
Or cat-flavored dog food?
Why do they report power outages on TV?
Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers
aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?