Patrick3

Picture this. A fast clip of montage in the everyday life of people - an orphan looking into a window where a family is gathered around the dinner table, a girl sitting in a chair by herself at a dance, a black man standing outside a door marked �NO COLOREDS�, a candy red apple in a box of oranges... somewhere in time, each one of us have gone through an experience that made us feel like we did not belong. This feeling, which is loaded with other related emotions like surprise, bewilderment, anger, shame, and sadness, is alienation. It is derived from the Latin word alienus which means stranger or foreign from. Its exclusive meaning has been applied liberally in the world of psychology (alienist = early term for psychiatrist; alienation = insanity) and space research ( alien = extraterrestrial creature). But whether in this world or out of this world, alienation exists and has touched our lives in one way or another.
I was born to a mother whose passport was stamped �Registered Alien.� She definitely met the criteria - she was a foreigner, a stranger, an outsider and according to her, insane enough to travel halfway across the world to start a new life. I can rightfully say that I had an early brush with alienation. In a world full of Baptists and Methodists, I was baptized a Catholic. In a Gerber world of babies, I was weaned on rice soup. In a town where everybody is related to one another, mine lived in another hemisphere. Ketchup may be king of the table, but soy sauce rules in my house. A typical conversation in my house is a mixture of English, Tagalog, Spanish, Chinese and several local dialects going on at the same time. Western and Eastern philosophies get shared, dissected, distilled and absorbed. Current events are viewed globally, spanning two hemispheres. The family tree has roots in Scotland, mainland China and Spain. Knife and fork, chopsticks; French fries, egg rolls; chicken soup, egg-drop soup; iced tea, hot tea; fried chicken, fried rice. My middle name should have been Janus - one face looking to the East, the other looking to the West.
In this quilted life I know, it is easy enough to feel confused. I could act crazy and feel a sense of entitlement. I could claim it as a birthright, after all. I was raised in an environment where compromise is a verb, an ongoing process to this day and the days that will come. In this atmosphere of no absolutes, and with the many instances of alienation I have encountered I have also experienced an epiphany. To focus on the differences is an exercise in futility. Why not enjoy the diversity and claim the best of both worlds? Integration, the antithesis of alienation, will require more effort on my part. To remain alienated connotes a sense of passivity and surrender. Alienation evokes words like static, stagnant, caged, dull, and flat. Integration means to make a whole out of parts. It evokes words like restoration, consideration, fusion and completion.
I view alienation as a self-defeating state of mind and emotion. It is an obstacle I must face and conquer. Remember the global point of view I am used to? I use it to put everything in the right perspective. Everyone, and I mean everyone, has experienced this feeling of alienation sometime in their lives. Some get warped by it and some get over it and move on. I choose the latter. There is a place for me and I will find it. I will be armed with an outlook that has been fused together from two disparate and yet equally intrinsic ways of life.
Picture this. An orphan looking into a window turns around and pats the head of his devoted pet dog, a girl sitting in a chair by herself at a dance hums a song she just composed, a black man standing outside a door marked �NO COLOREDS� places a pot of bright red geraniums at its base, a candy red apple in a box of full of oranges sits there and just shines. It is all a matter of perspective.tive.