I remember the wind picking me up and letting me ride it vaguely, but now he tells me that I am not one of the dirt and dust anymore, but I am his woman.
This makes me confused, but he tells me I am here because of a divine power, and because of a miracle. He tells me I am beautiful but I do not know what beauty is.
And he tells me of these sins and urges me to obey the resto put down for us and not do those things which are forbidden.
He has told me that I was only created here to be of a companion to him. This confuses me and makes me think I am just this one’s plaything.
I shake my head, confused. His divine god tells me that my purpose will always be his demands. This god does not understand why I would want to have something more…why I would want to be seen as a first like him, as my equal. I do not like coming second, like I am not important enough.
Adam tells me my name is Eve, but I do not understand why all these things in this river valley have names. He tells me that this place is called the Garden of Eden.
My name is Eve. I came after Adam. This is all I can say about myself. They both tell me this is the way it will be, so every woman who comes after me will be second to every man as well. I am learning. He is Man, but I am just woman.
I am learning everyday. These green things are plants and trees and there are things called fruits to serve me hunger. All these things in this place were a gift of his—no—our god Yahweh. He is the caretaker of us and I think that Adam and I are the caretakers of the Garden of Eden. I have learned of plants, and animals—these animals are interesting, but they are not men or women, but they can think because they always do different things.
I am learning about beauty. Yahweh teaches me to love the things of his creation. I have created things as well. After the rains fall, I put my hands into the mud that used to be dirt and I make things. Adam lets me amuse myself. I do not understand why he does not enjoy creating things as well. I make up stories with my creations. Adam tells me that I cannot made mud creations anymore because Yahweh thinks I am trying to dishonor things by creating them myself. I do not understand why this is a problem. My creative stories do not do anything to Adam or to him—they are just pretend and imaginary, I know they are not real.
We have been here for seven round moons and Adam tells me that this is a special time because the number seven is holy. He says it means holy. He says “Elansei means holiness, Eve, remember this and never forget.”
But in secret I have already taken the name for myself because I know that holiness always comes first before creation. I like his name for me, Eve, but I think Elansei is a better name.
I sleep besides him, feeling the warmth of his body next to me and think of why I was really created. Yahweh has told me many times that I will meet the first women and men that will come after me, but I have not heard him say he will create them.
Then the sun comes, day breaks, and the morning has come. Eagerly, I wake before him, proud of myself because I do these things first.
There is coming light so I can see a little bit. I think that I hear a voice, not like my own, but not like Adam’s or Yahweh’s either, but I am not sure.
I ask Yahweh if someone is here, another man, or another woman, but he does not answer.
I walk through the garden, looking for the source of the whispering. I do not hear Adam call for me but I know he might come to find me.
I walk by a peach tree and the whispering catches my thought, the voice says, “Eve, would you like to know everything first?”
I look and look for a man or a woman but I can see none who look like us, only a sleepy tongued serpent curling against a low branch.
“Where are you?” I say.
“Heerrreeee….” And behold, the serpent is speaking to me. I look around—no Adam. I am thinking that this is one of Yahweh’s gifts because as long as I have been here, none of the animals can speak.
Yahweh must be giving me a gift, a companion. I clap my hands, delighted. “Yes?” I ask the serpent, “what can I do first?”
“you will know of all things if you eat from the tree that guards the spring.”
And I shake my head, no, I cannot do that, “Adam and Yahweh have told me not to eat from that tree.”
And the serpent tells me “but Adam and Yahweh eat from the tree all the time, how else does Adam always know so many things?”
This makes me confused because I thought that Yahweh told him those things.
The snake uncurls itself and rises up to meet me, face to face, “the forbidden tree hold the fruits of knowledge. Young one, to eat willingly of the fruit, your eyes and mind will be opened, and you will know of things like power and creation—though it may only be a taste of greater things.”
I shake my head confused. I do not know if Adam has really, truly eaten first from this tree. I wonder why he has not told me he has because I am supposed to do whatever he does, after he does them.
No, Yahweh gave me a gift, he created this serpent to tell me something important. I ask Yahweh is this is a gift, this snake, but he does not answer me, so it must be true.
Adam taught me about sharing. Whatever he does first, he shares with me second, after he has.
Elated, I thank the serpent and go to the tree. If I pick two first, now I can share something special with Adam. I pick two fruits that have the coloring of blood on them. They feel round and hard in my hands. I am not sure if this is fruit or not because it feels different.
When I find Adam, he is bathing in the river. I swim out to him and give him one of the fruits. I tell him to eat it with me because a creation animal told me to eat it. And we are sharing the fruit and it tastes good. He mumbles something at me with food in his mouth but then he says “I like it. Its name is ampso, now, Eve.”
And now, my eyes and my mind and my body feel limitless. I look at Adam and his eyes are big as well.
Adam and Elansei, I think to myself. There are so many revelations I am learning within.
Then Adam says something stupid. “Eve, we’re naked. It’s a sin! Get some leaves.” I think only that he must have said that because he did a big sin and he feels bad.
But I have done it first, and I got to share something with him, it was my first time.
Adam is really acting like a fool, he is using vines and plants and leaves to make a covering for my body. Its strange because he always told me my body was beautiful, so why does he want me to hide it.
I am not comfortable with him, he seems different. Maybe I should not have let him eat the fruit he called ampso.
After a while we fall asleep on the hill, then Adam wakes me up when the earth shakes and drags me off into the trees. I want to know what we are doing and why but he keeps telling me to be quiet.
Yahweh asks him (always asks him first, always) why we are hiding from him, and Yahweh says to me, how does he know he is naked. I do not understand this still, and I do not understand why Yahweh asked me if I knew. I just tell him I was skyclad but Adam made a covering for me.
Yahweh wants to know if Adam ate from the tree. He says yes and Yahweh tells him it is a forbidden fruit. Then Adam says “I did not pick the fruit from the tree, the woman gave it to me.”
I bow my head, respectfully, even though inside, I am angry because he did not call me Eve. I am Elansei, I am Elansei. My name is Eve and Elansei.
Yahweh wants me to tell him why I ate of the fruit. I tell him that a serpent of his creation told me to.
He wants to know why I did not ask him if it was Satan.
I do not know who this Satan is but I tell him that when I called for him, he gave me no answer.
Yahweh says “The woman lies, Adam. I am sending someone down for her sins. I will banish you from Eden into the desert and I will cast you and her and all of your children and children’s children on a bed of suffering.
I am bothered, because I think that Yahweh ignored my calls so he would trick me into listening to the serpent. Now I am just angry because Yahweh always listens to Adam, but never that level of attention with me.
I keep telling myself my name is Elansei but it does not work.
Adam tells me to come, he tells me we must leave paradise now. I ask him if this is another one of his words, because I have never heard it before, but he tell me, no it is Yahweh’s word.
And now he grabs my arm and we are running from Eden. There are two angels that we pass that hold long shiny sticks and they wave them at us, telling us to go away and leave this place. Adam tells me that they hold swords. He says swords are used to punish people with sins. I still don’t understand how knowing things outside of myself is a crime but he just tells me that I am supposed to just follow him and do whatever he does. He tells me women were not created to think.
Then I am angry now, and I scream at him “My name is Elansei! I am my own holiness! And you cannot defile me!”
And now that I have screamed it to the sky, it seems so much lonelier here, outside of Eden called paradise.
Adam just stares at me. Gently he tells me that it is not my right o claim a name when I have already been blessed with one.
No, no, tears seep our of the corners of my eyes and I am crying, crying, crying…
Through my tears, I look back at the Garden of Eden and the angels are still guarding it. So then, Yahweh did give us something to remember. I try to tell Adam but he is not listening. But I can see what Yahweh left us. The promise of paradise. A chance to return to Eden.
I drop to my knees and cry.
Elansei: The Dawn of Eve, Copyright (c) 2007 by Felicia Tran