Here are some examples of the 8 different kinds of abuse:
A single act may not constitute abuse, but if someone is doing something to harm or control you then you are being abused.
An asterisk (*) indicates
actions that are clearly criminal acts depending upon the circumstances
*Making
her do illegal things
False accusation
Name calling,
finding fault
Verbal threats
Yelling
Intimidation
Making her think
she's crazy or stupid
Overpowering her
emotions
Disbelieving her
Bringing up old
issues
Inappropriate
expression of jealousy
Degrading her
Turning a situation
against her
Brainwashing her
Laughing in her
face
Silence
Refusing to do
things with or for her
Insisting on always
getting his own way
Pressuring her
Neglecting her
Expecting her
to conform to a role
Real or suggested
involvement with other women
Making her feel
guilty
Certain mannerisms,
such as snapping fingers at her
Threatening to
get drunk or stoned unless
Manipulating her
Starting arguments
Withholding affection
Punishing her
by not sharing in household chores
Never really forgiving,
holding grudges
Lying
Treating her as
a child
Having a double
standard for her
Saying one thing,
meaning another
Denying or taking
away her responsibilities
Failing to keep
commitments
Threatening her
with the loss of immigration status
Deliberately creating
a mess for her to clean up
Threatening to
report her to the authorities
Making her drop
charges
Telling her jokes
that belittle or indicate hatred toward women
Refusing to deal
with issues
Minimizing her
work or contribution
Pressuring her
to stay while drugs or alcohol are being abused
Not coming home
Coming home drunk
or stoned
Having pictures
that indicate hate or violence against women
Egging her on,
challenging her to engage in physical violence
Friendship or
support of men who are abusive
Demanding an accounting
of her time and routine
Taking advantage
of her fear of something
Putting her on
a pedestal
Ridiculing her
food preferences
Threatening suicide
unless...
Emotional Abuse Surrounding Reproduction, Pregnancy and Childbirth
Refusing to allow
or forcing her to use contraception
Forcing her to
have an abortion
Refusing sex on
the grounds that her pregnant body is ugly
Denial that the
child is his
Refusing to support
her during the pregnancy
Refusing to support
her during the birth
Denying her access
to her newborn child
Not supporting
her or helping out after she comes home with the baby
Demanding sex
soon after childbirth
Blaming her because
the infant is the "wrong" sex
Refusing to allow
her to breast-feed
Sulking or making
her feel bad for time spent with the baby
Social Abuse
Controlling what
she does, whom she sees and talks to, what she reads and where she goes
Failing to pass
on messages
Putting down or
ignoring her in public
Not allowing her
access to family or friends
Interfering with
her family or friends
Change of personality
with others
Being rude to
her friends or relatives
Dictating her
mode of dress
Dictating her
behavior
Habitually choosing
friends, activities or work rather than being with her
Making a "scene"
in public
Making her account
for herself
Censoring her
mail
Treating her like
a servant
Not giving her
space or privacy
Insisting on accompanying
her into the doctor's office
Social Abuse Involving
Children
Assaulting her
in front of the children
Initiating false
child-abuse charges against her
Making her stay
at home with the children
Teaching children
to abuse their mother through name calling, hitting, etc.
Embarrassing her
in front of the children
Not sharing responsibility
for the children
Threatening to
abduct the children or telling her she'll never get custody
Putting down her
parenting ability
Social Abuse During Separation or Divorce
Buying the children's
affection with expensive gifts
Not showing up
on time to pick up children or not having them back on time
Pumping children
for information about their mother's boyfriends, etc.
Telling children
their mother is responsible for breaking up the family
Using children
to transport messages
Denying her access
to the children
Failing to supply
a valid phone number
Environmental Abuse in Home or Vehicle
ABUSE IN HOME
*Harming pets
*Ripping clothing
*Locking her in
or out
*Throwing or destroying
her possessions
Slamming doors
Throwing objects
or food
Denying her use
of the phone
Punching walls
Mowing over her
garden
ABUSE IN THE VEHICLE
*Driving
too fast
*Driving recklessly,
pounding the steering wheel
*Driving while
intoxicated
*Forcing her into
a vehicle
*Pushing her out
of a vehicle when it's in motion
*Threatening to
kill her by driving into an oncoming car, etc.
*Chasing or hitting
her with a vehicle
*Killing or injuring
her in a deliberate accident
*Hitting her while
she's driving
Prohibiting her
from using a vehicle by tampering with the engine, taking the keys, etc.
Putting his foot
over hers on the gas pedal
Grabbing the steering
wheel while she's driving
Sexual Abuse
*Any unwanted
sexual contact
*Forcing her to
have sex; hounding her to have sex
*Forcing her to
have sex with others
*Forcing her to
have sex with animals
*Uttering threats
to obtain sex
*Pinching, slapping,
grabbing or poking her breasts or genitals
*Forcing sex when
she's sick or after childbirth or surgery
Sleeping around
Knowingly transmitting
sexual diseases
Treating her as
a sex object
Being rough
Pressuring her
to pose for pornographic photos
Displaying pornography
that makes her feel uncomfortable
Using sex as the
basis or solution for an argument
Criticizing her
sexual ability
Unwanted fondling
in public
Purposely not
washing and expecting sex
Name calling (whore,
slut, frigid, bitch)
Accusations of
affair
Degrading
her body parts
Telling sexual
jokes that are uncomfortable for her to hear
Using sex as the
basis or solution for an argument
Religious Abuse
Using religion
to justify abuse or dominance
Using church position
to pressure for sex or favors
Using her, then
demanding forgiveness
Excessive spending
for religion
Interpreting religion
your way
Preventing her
from attending church
Requiring sex
acts or drug use as religious acts
Mocking her beliefs
Financial Abuse
*Taking her money
*Forging her name
Giving her false
receipts
Canceling her
insurance
Sabotaging her
efforts to attain economic freedom
Withholding money
Spending money
foolishly or beyond means
Pressuring her
to take full responsibility for finances
Not paying fair
share of bills
Not spending money
on special occasions'
Spending on addictions,
gambling, sexual services
Pressuring or
controlling her working conditions
Keeping family
finances a secret
Preventing her
from taking a job
Physical abuse
Any unwanted physical contact
*Kicking, punching
or pinching her
*Pulling or pushing
her
*Slapping, hitting
or shaking her
*Cutting or burning
her
*Force-feeding
her
*Spitting on her
*Throwing her
or throwing things at her
*Hitting her with
objects or whipping her
*Restraining her
in any way
*Urinating on
her
*Breaking her
bones
*Knifing or shooting
her
*Threatening to
kill or injure her
Ignoring her illness
or injury\Denying or restricting her food or drink
Pressuring or
tricking her into alcohol or drug abuse
Standing too close/intimidating
her
Hiding or withholding
necessary medication
Ritual Abuse
*Mutilation
*Animal Mutilation
*Forced cannibalism
*Human sacrifices
Suggesting or promoting suicide
Forcing her to participate in rituals
Forcing her to witness rituals