| Hoity's First Fight A lesson in grog abuse. Take heed all ye brave warriors. A few too many sips at the flagon, and you might be lying on your back, staring up at Hoity, whose sense of fair play hasn't been spotted since 1978. Note: As a special favor to the newly combat-approved Hoity, Morbardak agreed to fight bare-handed, even though one swipe of his scimitar would have laid her out flat. Morbardak comes out of his tent in a drunken rage. He spies Hoity, the insulant former snaga, and runs at it. As he nears, he brings his right hand back and brings it forward right at Hoity's chest. Morbardak attacks you with his Bare Hands!... ...and he misses! Hoity sees Morbardak's attack at the last second and crouches down on her knees to escape his fist. Springing back up to her diminutive height, she cackles, "See, I am train! I make muscles! You not see this!" Leaping back and forth from leg to leg, she taps her bicep while circling Morbardak, gibbering and gleefully clacking her teeth together. She puts her left hand on her head, hops twice up and down on her right leg, an expression of serious concentration on her face, and launches her right fist at Morbardak's jaw. You attack Morbardak with your Bare Hands... Your attack against Morbardak lightly wounds him! Morbardak recovers, his glazed gaze trying to capture just one image of the female uruk. Shaking his head as he moves, brings both of his dark arms wide. As the distance closes, he attempts to grab her and put her into a bear hug, a move that might kill a tark. Morbardak attacks you with his Bare Hands!... ...and he misses! Hoity squeezes out from between Morbardak's arms, and as the circle closes she crouches again and Morb tramples over her as she goes between his legs. Standing and spinning around, she plants her left hand on her head again, hops twice up and down on her right leg, and then raises her right hand high, hollering, "Troll say bash!" as she tries to smash Morbardak's kneecap. You attack Morbardak with your Bare Hands... Your attack against Morbardak lightly wounds him! Morbardak roars, as blood begins to trickle down his chin. His roar, however, comes out as a near-silent cough. His muscles tighten around his neck, revealing several viens filled with his dark, black blood. He joins his hands, forming one large fist, which he brings down towards the dog's head. Morbardak attacks you with his Bare Hands!... ...and he misses! As the larger dog's fists come flying at Hoity from above, she rushes forward, so that they land behind her head, encircling her in their grasp. She pummels Morbardak in the stomach from close range, her head in his belly, her fists flying. You can hear her squeaking, "Hit hit! I hit! Like troll!" And her legs go scampering up and down in rhythm with her blows. You attack Morbardak with your Bare Hands... Your attack against Morbardak lightly wounds him! Morbardak whoofs as the smaller dog knocks the air out of him. Without thinking, the taller dog kicks as he falls on his arse. Hoity leaps onto Morbardak, straddling him at his waist, her little legs almost reaching the ground on each side. She punches her finger into his nose, and says, "You drunk uruk. Too much grog! You say sorry you punch me and I give you my hat." She gurgles with delight, and points with her other hand to the hat on her head, which has been cut almost clear through by a sword. It still hangs together, and makes a bland little topknot on her flat head. "You say sorry and go to bed, Drunky! You forego your chance to attack. Morbardak eyes gain a very deep glaze as he struggles to maintain balance. With a thump, he falls over, just feet from his tent, passed out. A gathering of snaga laugh and cheer for Hoity, but they quickly quiet down as he growls and rolls over, now dreaming of choking the pitiful dog. Hoity pants and wipes her mouth on her arm, as she has seen real warriors do after a brawl. She leans over and sniffs the air coming out of Morbardak's nose with each unconscious breath, and makes a face. "That good grog you been drinking" she giggles, and then she gets a devious idea. She carefully but tightly ties the bootlaces of the sleeping dog together, then creeps away to hide behind a rock. She beckons to other snaga to come close and listen, and then they all disperse, hiding around the sleeping Morbardak. Hoity calls Valdrock over to her and whispers in his ear. Hoity , tiny and triumphant, leaps out from behind a rock and says, "NOW!" to all the snaga who are in hiding. Valdrock jumps out from behind a rock giggling like a school girl and shouts "Spider" in unison with the other snaga. The group of snaga dance around Morbardak, poking him and hollering, "SPIDER IN CAMP" into his ears. Hoity hides behind the rock, her eyes poking out just enough to take in the sight. Morbardak wakes up with a shiver, unsure of where he is. He just groans in pain as he picks himself up and attempts to move. When he brings his left foot forward, he falls forward, landing on a few unfortunate snaga. He realizes what is going on, then pulls his scimitar from his sheath and waves it about. "Leave me alone before I lop yer heads off," he whispers as he stumbles towards his tent. |