"Thug Appeal"
Where we last left off...
In the parking lot of a certain media center, the guys of *NSYNC have managed to contain a singer-turned-revenant by the name of Pam Panberstone, only to see her disintegrated before their eyes by a group referring to themselves as the Backstreet Boys.
*Howie: "New" group? Sorry, but we've been around for a while.
Hey, don't interrupt me, or I'll make an even worse drawing of you, impossible as it may seem.
Anyway, due to otherwise unseemly circumstances, both groups are now on the edge of violence.
*Chris: Well, they started it!
*Howie: Hey, you look kind of familiar...
*AJ: Enough already with the chitchat! We'll give you one last chance, *NSYNC. Back away from your futile fight with the Corpulence, and maybe we'll let you off.
*Joey: You know, all that anger and hostility can't be good for your premature-baldness.
*AJ: You should talk, jello-boy, a little dieting wouldn't hurt you now, would it!?
*Justin: We're not the ones that should be backing down, yo. If you wanna battle, bring it on.
*Nick: Just give the signal, prettyboy, I'd like to see how well you do your solos with my foot in yo' face.
*Lance: You know, it's a shame how you guys think you have to prove something.
*Kevin: Prove something!? Can't you even come up with an original taunt? Find your own identity, lil' boy.
*JC: You know what, I'm gonna kick some tail, man, that's all I'm saying. I'm getting down.
*Brian: ...
Central: *NSYNC, I must warn you against this course of action! These people...they're not like any enemy you've faced before!
Busta: He's right, guys, what are you all doing!? There's gotta be something we can...
But before Busta could finish his warning, the battle has already started in a sudden flash of action.
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*Justin couldn't quite understand it at first...one second the blonde guy was right in front of him, the next, he felt *Nick's presence from behind.
*Nick: Wey you lookin' at, foo'!
Reacting quickly, *Justin spun around with a high roundhouse kick, aiming for *Nick's head.
*Justin could have sworn he saw it connect. But a split second later, *Nick was gone again.
*Nick: Whatup whatup, yo jes' ain't gots no game!?
The left!
*Justin: *NSYNC Tearing Frostbite!
He launched his pellets of ice in towards *Nick, spreading their impact radius; There's no way he could dodge this!
But dodge them he did...in a series of fluid, liquid motions, *Nick effortlessly maneuvered around all the pellets streaming towards him. It was like he was made out of water.
*Justin: ...Hyperspeed action...? What be up wit dat yo! You tryin' ta play me fo'a nimrod!?
*Nick: Yo foo', git yo prette lil' face outta 'ere if you be down wit mah vahbe, dilly yo!
*Justin: Ahr' yous tryin' ta be underminin' dis 'ere Timba'lake skills!?
Um...could we cut down the crunkspeak to a minimum?
*Nick: That's right, fool. You think you're so nifty with you dance steps, now see who's got the real flow!
*Nick immediately launced into his counteroffensive; Moving with all his speed, he literally flew around *Justin, confusing his eye, making it seem as if there were *Nicks all around him.
*Justin: Oooooh...O_O. Too many *Nicks...I'm gonna hurl!
A sudden flash from the side, and suddenly one of the *Nicks thrust his arm forward and shouted.
*Nick: Say hello to my watery friend...Backstreet Hydro Torpedo!
From *Nick's hand fired...a life-sized dolphin, formed completely out of water, streaming towards *Justin like a torpedo.
Alarmed, *Justin lept to one side, but the dolphin followed in his course like a guided missile, almost like it was alive!
*Justin: That's right, don't you ever underestimate the full force of the crunkmaster!
**************************************************************
*Howie: You know, I think I do recognize you...Chris Kirkpatrick!?
*Chris: Huh? Do I know you?
*Howie: ...
Before he knew what was happening, *Chris suddenly felt himself roughly knocked backwards a couple dozen yards by an invisible force. Telekinesis!?
*Howie: Of course you wouldn't remember me, would you?
The invisible blasts came again and again. *Chris tried forming an aerodynamic force field around himself, but it didn't work; These weren't physical attacks, but psionic powers.
*Chris: Wait a minute...Howie D!? Little Howie D!
*Howie: You were always the cool one, weren't you? You never had time to pay attention to dweebs like me. Well, now I'm smarter, better, and taller!
*Chris: Uh...
*Howie: Just because I was into math.
*Chris: Uh...
*Howie: I had feelings too.
*Chris: Uh...Howie...
*Howie: And what did you do? You totally belittled our friendship.
*Chris: Howie...you know I didn't.
*Howie: Don't even try it.
*Chris: Give me a break. Are you still caught up over that?
*Howie: How could I not be!? You took what was mine...you knew your place, and it wasn't there!
*Chris: ...
What is this? Some part of Chris and Howie's past that we don't know about(Well, I do, since I'm writing this jack)and won't be revealed till later, in true formulaic plotline fashion?
*Howie: Backstreet Psycho Crusher!
The huge rush of kinetic energy slammed across the parking lot and into *Chris...
...or it should have. When the debris cleared, there was no sign of *Chris.
*Howie: What, did I take care of you so easily?
Could it be!? Could *Chris have been taken down by the likes of Howie Dorough!? Is this the last of the Grand FuMan!? Well, of course not, duh, I'm just adding to the suspense.
*Chris: Wheeeeeee...! I'm Halle Berry!
Startled, Howie glanced up to see *Chris was floating twenty feet in the air, propelled by his own wind power.
*Chris: Howie...I'm not gonna apologize for what I did. You knew the risks and you took them. I fell through, you didn't. Don't put this on me.
*Howie: Shut up! Still your arrogant self, I see. What do you know about what I had to go through!? I had nothing, you had everything, but that wasn't enough was it!? Even today...you still take what I should have...
*Chris: *NSYNC Lunatic Storm!
Now the tide was turned; *Howie rushed to defend himself against the whirlslashes.
*Chris: I'm not gonna apologize! It wasn't my fault...but if you're gonna get stuck up over it...!
*Howie: Bring it on, fogie!
**************************************************************
Wumph!!!
*Joey: Ow! Why am I always the one who falls on his ***!?
The force from *AJ's..."pyrotechnics?"...had blasted *Joey back onto his butt. Apparently, this Boy had the power to generate sparks, fireworks, explosions, flashes of energy in general.
*Joey: Kinda like Jubilee. He's shaped like Jubilee, too...
*AJ: Hey! You think you're so masculine with your thirty thousand pounds of fat!?
*Joey: Someone's bitter over not being able to grow a freakin' actual goatee.
*AJ: My goatee is fine. What with me actually washing my face once in a while!
*Joey: At least my grease is where it belongs, not splattered all over my hair:P
You both need to make better use of your appearance, can we get on with the bloodletting now?
*Joey: I don't get it.
*AJ: And I doubt you ever will.
*Joey: Funny. What's with your attitudes? You stroll up to us all uppity and whatever, make these accusations, and demand that we stop doing what we do. You're not bad at what you do yourselves, why are you getting on our case!?
*AJ: If you weren't busy copying our every moves you might actually figure out that you *NSYNC have no futures; Your fame is temporary, it's only a matter of time before you fade away...
*Joey: Copying your every moves!? Get over yourselves, we don't spend our time spying on what every other band is doing, we focus on us. Is this what it's all about, you're afraid that we're gonna usurp you or something? Are you all that insecure about your own potential? Is this how you justify killing an innocent girl!? Don't you have any respect for yourselves!?
*AJ: Shut up! Backstreet Nova Burst!
The air once again began to clash and explode with atomic fireworks, but this time *Joey was prepared.
*Joey: *NSYNC Burning Light!
*AJ: Arg! You're really askin' for it!
*Joey: Oh, grow a beard.
**************************************************************
*Lance knew he couldn't compete with *Kevin in terms of strength alone...the man was a giant, and he knew it. Just standing there with that arrogant attitude, like he was totally impenetrable. Well, he wasn't gonna wait around for the cocky bastard to attack first.
*Lance: *NSYNC Deep Seismoburst!
The exploding rivulets snaked across the ground and, to *Lance's surprise, struck *Kevin directly. More to his surprise, *Kevin didn't budge, didn't seem to be affected at all.
*Lance: What the...?
*Kevin: What's the matter? Don't tell me that's the best you can do?
As he spoke, *Kevin began to walk calmly towards *Lance, who backed away apprehensively.
*Lance: *NSYNC Deep Seismoburst!
*Lance continued to strike at the earth repeatedly, the golden blasts continuously rising. But they did absolutely nothing against *Kevin.
*Lance: What is this!?
*Kevin: We warned you.
Now he was standing almost direcly in front of *Lance. Up close, he was even more imposing. And annoying.
*Kevin: Posers, all of you. Can't do anything by yourselves, always relying on others. Thinking that you're some kind of trend setter.
*Lance: Look who's talking! You must not feel very secure about your own positions if you spend all your time worrying about what we're doing.
*Kevin: You interfere with us, our goals. There's only enough room for us in the world!
*Lance: Not to be "unoriginal" again, but you and your ego fill up more than your share of room.
*Kevin: I've had about enough of you.
Saying thus, *Kevin delivered a uppercut straight into *lance, who flew for several seconds before landing on his back. It was like there was some alternate force that *Lance didn't notice propelling him...Righteously pissed, *Lance immediately jumped back on his feet and aimed a flying kick at *Kevin's head, but before he got close, he was knocked back again.
This time he could see it...a silver energy source surrounding *Kevin, like a force field.
*Kevin: "Backstreet Cosmic Armor"...when it's activated, nothing gets through to me.
*Lance: I doubt you need any help with that...
*Kevin: Anything you throw at me will be repelled, including physical attacks. It also propels my own attacks, increasing my power. Give up now, lil' boy, there's no way you can harm me.
*Lance: You know, that's the thing about you Backstreets: You all expect us to just back down when you tell us to.
*Lance then prepared to use his own powers once again.
*Kevin: Why don't you ever give up!? Don't you know that you have no chance whatsoever!?
*Lance: 'Cause. I. Am. From. Mississippi! *NSYNC Deep Seismoburst!
The earth shuddered once again and the golden energy shot forward. But instead of striking up at *Kevin they focused on the cement ground beneath him.
*Kevin: Huh?
The earth below his feet made a groaning gasp and opened up, swallowing *Kevin completely, then collapsed onto itself.
*Lance: Your *** may be impenetrable, but you can't defy the laws of gravity.
Unfortunately, *Kevin was able to claw his way back to the surface with help from his force field.
*Kevin: Urg! You punk! Thinking you're so cool...
*Lance: Uh...huh. Anytime you want that kick in the face you so deserve, just let me know.
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*Brian: ...Are you ready?
*JC: Hey man, you were the ones who started this. Bring it on.
*Brian: ...
The air crackled as the two summoned their powers.
*JC: *NSYNC Spasmic Lightning!
*Brian: Backstreet Nuclear Orb!
BOOM!!!
The two attacks collided with a rush of pure power, neither side gaining the advantage nor showing any signs of receding, and so it continued.
*JC: Why are you doing this!? You don't seem like the others, who are out only for sake of their own egos...why are you fighting us!?
*Brian: ...
*JC: Why can't you understand what we're trying to do!
*Brian: ...
*JC: Answer me!
*Brian: ...You don't understand. You don't understand at all.
*JC: Then tell me! No matter what you say, you know you didn't have to kill Pam...you know you didn't want to!
*Brian: You don't understand at all, what the Corpulence can do. What they have done.
*JC: So what, what does this have to do with you picking a bone with us...we're trying to stop them too! We're trying to stop them from taking lives, taking dreams...
Suddenly, the calm, in-control look on *Brian's face was gone again...replaced by the cold, malicious anger they had seen in the mall.
*Brian: If you were really working to stop them, if you really knew what you were doing, if you were really trying to save lives, if you are really as d***ed righteous and positive as you say you are...THEN WHY WEREN'T YOU THERE WHEN THEY TOOK HER!!!???
*JC: !?
As surprised as *JC was by this insane outburst, all the other members of *NSYNC and the Backstreet Boys heard it too and were even more alarmed, turning from their respective battles to witness this.
*Nick: Crap! *Brian, get a hold of yourselves!
Apparently the Boys knew what was going on...the members of *NSYNC were befuddled.
*Brian: WHY WEREN'T YOU THERE!? YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO ACTUALLY LOSE SOMEONE...DON'T TALK TO ME ABOUT SAVING LIVES!!!
*JC: ...What!?
*Brian: Why didn't you save HERS!?
*Howie: Brian, stop it!
But even as his confusion grew, *JC sensed that *Brian's Nuclear Orb was actually weakening. He was losing control, which meant losing control over his own powers. Seizing control of the situation, *JC launched an even larger onslaught of his lightning bolts, which easily penetrated *Brian's further weakening powers and struck him full in the chest.
As *Brian fell backwards, time seemed to stand still. No one moved or spoke. The battles were abruptly stopped.
After what seemed like a millenium, *Brian struggled ever slowly to a sitting position, staring at *JC all the time. The viscious fury was gone from his face, thankfully.
Brian: ...Why didn't you kill me? You could have.
*JC: You know why.
*Brian: You know you can't do it. You can't fight this fight without...the will to do the terrible. I didn't, and that's how I lost her to them. Never again.
*As the others approached them, *JC nodded, slowly beginning to understand.
*JC: Then I only have one more thing to ask you: Have you given up?
*Brian: ...!
By now the others have now joined them, *NSYNC with *NSYNC, BSB with BSB.
*Joey: So now what...?
The fire was far from gone, though...the two groups still glared tersely at each other, ready at any moment to launch back into the fray.
Busta: Guys, please, before you do anything else you've got to listen to me!
*Chris: Busta? Are you still here?
Busta: Just because the fruity author hasn't noted my existence for around fifteen minutes doesn't mean that I went somewhere. Guys, if you'll take some time out of your pointless slaughter, there are three revenants coming towards you!
All the guys, including the Backstreets, was alarmed to note this...all around them, negative energy! Three revenants, right there...How could they have not noticed them!?
*Justin: *NSYNC Tearing Frostbite!
*AJ: Backstreet Nova Burst!
The two scattered attacks struck at the three revenants, knocking them back. But, as they were not destroyed, they got up and dashed away at full speed.
*Nick: What...?
Then they discovered that it wasn't just around them, it was as if the entire region...no, the entire world was covered in dark energy...what is this!?
Busta: According to Central, Revenants have appeared all over the world. They are starting their assaults as we speak!
*AJ: How can something like this happen without our knowing it!?
"Because you were all too busy combatting each other to care about anything else...just like I predicted you would."
All heads turned to the source of the voice, standing a mere distance from them.
*Chris: Lou...!?
*Lance: What's going on!?
A small chuckle came out of the fat man's mouth.
Lou: I suppose I really must thank you for hating each other so much...if not, you might've actually stopped us from completing the final transformations, and then where would we be? Back at the start...
*Justin: What are you saying!?
The Backstreets were staring at *NSYNC in wonder.
*AJ: You mean you really didn't know! How could you all have been so blind!?
*Brian: No wonder...they didn't suspect at all...
Lou: Hello again, Brian, how's your girlfriend doing?
At this *Brian exhaled sharply, obviously distraught. Lou chuckled again.
*Joey: I'm not usually very clueful, which is why I'm not ashamed to say that I have no clue as to what's going on.
*JC: Revenants appearing all over the world, Lou here...could it be...?
Busta: My God.
Lou made a little bow with his head.
Lou: I suppose I should introduce myself to you again...My name is Lou Pearlman. I'm head of TransContinental Records. I'm also second-in-command in the ranks of the Corpulence.
*NSYNC: !!!
*Justin: You!? All this time...well I guess we shouldn't be that surprised, but...
Continue!
