)Day 1
Milk is good.
Day 2
Daddy is huge. I hope I don't look like him when I grow up.
He also has a really funny looking face. I tried touching it today and it hurt! I was confused because I touched Mommy's face and it didn't hurt. Maybe Daddy is an alien.
Day 3
I met Uncle Lance today. He's really sexy. I can tell because Daddy looks at him in this really funny way and even I know something's going on. Mommy looked a little worried.
Anyway, Uncle Lance held me and said that he was going to be my Godfather from now on. I'm not sure what that means, but I was happy because Uncle Lance is really sexy like I said and I liked looking at him. I think Daddy likes looking at him too, but I'm not sure. Uncle Lance speaks really funny too. I think it's called an "accent." I don't like Uncle Lance's accent, but he's sexy so it's okay.
Day 4
Grandpa is huge.
I think everyone in Daddy's side of the family is an alien. Uncle Steve always carries a strange toy with him on his face. Maybe he needs it to see correctly on Earth because he's an alien. I played with it today when Uncle Steve was talking with one of Mommy's friends and he screamed really loudly. Mommy told me not to play with Uncle Steve's toy anymore, but Daddy just laughed. I was confused. I think that if I did something bad with Uncle Steve's toy he won't be able to see correctly anymore and would have to go back to space. That sounded like fun. Maybe Daddy will take me to his home planet someday.
Uncle Lance came again today, and he still looked sexy. He still talked funny though, always something about a Mrs. Sippy. I was suddenly afraid that Uncle Lance was married to this Mrs. Sippy, but Daddy wasn't worried so I tried not to be either. I don't want Uncle Lance to be married.
Day 5
Mommy called me "baby girl" today. I'm relieved because if I'm a girl it means that I won't look like Daddy when I grow up.
Day 6
Milk is good.
Day 7
I met Uncle Chris and Uncle JC today. They were scary:(. Uncle Chris has something growing on the bottom of his face that looks really dangerous and Uncle JC has it growing at the top of his head. They were holding me all wrong so I started to cry and then Uncle JC started to cry too. Daddy took me back and Uncle Chris laughed for a really really really really long time. He just kept laughing and laughing and laughing and didn't stop. I started to worry about him even though he was scary, but Daddy wasn't worried so again I tried not to be. Uncle Chris stopped laughing after a while.
Uncle Lance came in, still very sexy, and behind him Uncle Justin. This was the first time I saw Uncle Justin too, and at first I thought he was just a tall baby. He didn't have a lot of hair like me and he looked like a baby too. He started talking to me and I tried to listen but I couldn't understand anything he was saying. It wasn't like Uncle Lance's "accent," I just didn't know any of the words he was saying. He kept saying stuff like "yo" and "word up" and "diggity" and "heazy" and "izzay" and "jigga." Mommy and Daddy never used those words, so I guess that I would have to go to school to learn them.
Anyway, Daddy gave me to Mommy and went somewhere with the strange and scary uncles. I wish Uncle Lance stayed, but I'm glad they went away. Those uncles were strange and scary. Maybe they're aliens too.
Day 8
Daddy taught me how to sing a song today. It was called "Get Your Freak On." Mommy looked upset at first, but then she started to laugh.
Day 9
I made Uncle JC cry again today.
He was trying to learn how to hold me right and I got very afraid of the dangerous thing growing at the top of his head. So I tried to push it away. To my surprise I found out that it was very soft and fuzzy. So I played with it for a while. At first Uncle JC thought it was funny. Then I started to pull on it, which made Uncle JC scream really loudly and then he started to cry. It was fun, but Daddy took me away from Uncle JC before I could have another pull, and I was disappointed. I tried to tell him but he was too busy apologizing to Uncle JC for some reason. Uncle Chris kept laughing throughout the whole thing and this time he didn't stop for a long time. Uncle Lance just stood there and looked sexy. Uncle Justin said something and I couldn't totally understand him because of all the "fo' sheezy"s that he put in but I think he said that he was glad he wasn't the one with the fro now. I guess that "fro" was the name for Uncle JC's fun head-toy. I want a fro of my own, they're fun. Mommy has a fro sometimes and sometimes she doesn't. I wonder were she keeps it when she isn't playing with it?
My Uncles are a lot more fun and not as scary as I thought. I think I'm going to have a lot more fun with them from now on. Even if they're aliens.
Day 10
Milk is good.
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