Church Report 05/05/03
It
was good to be back in church, once again, yeah. Now the attendance was very
predictable; Dungheap, Joe, Brent, John, Dan, Gal, Phatdrew, Alex, Brian, Mike,
and a couple short appearances during the session. The church started out,
surprisingly with at least 4 or 5 people attempting to sacrifice each other
(all their attempts were in vein at the end) and of course this lasted for
about... 15 seconds then it was down to the typical 3 man alternating pit. But
hey, make no mistake im not whining about that.
A
couple of songs that highlighted the first portion of the church was
"Stormblast" and "alt lynn svunnet es hen" both by Dimmu
Borgir. After a brief 15 minute skull krushing time period a sermon was
underway. A little bit to my surprise (and probably other people) the sermon
reader was actually in attendance for this church session. For crying out loud
if you look at this guy's church picture you would think he would be at every
church session and in the mosh pit constantly (Joe i.) A summary of his sermon was
basically in regards to how church was cool and umm basically how the black
hearted angels fallen from grace are bestowed upon us during these sessions,
and word life!
No
one thought for a solitary second that church was over, YET! (they were
genious') the songs started almost immediately with a deicide, cannibal corpse,
and a mortician song. It was basic moshing until the cannibal corpse song
titled "hammer smashed face" cut out into playing "skin
peeler" by mortician. At this time an evil looking man dressed in a jump
suit and a yellow ski mask with black stuff around his eyes emerged out the
darkness. He took what appeared to be a corpse and proceeded to grind it flush.
Only the people who were standing noticed him because you know the moshing was of
more importance than it anyways
After
this he began breaking beer bottles and handing them to sweet shits (if you
didn't accept a bottle that was handed to you remind chuck heap so your rating
can go down .15) after a while of moshing 2 individuals entered the arena. One
was a rather short huskier (or fat) looking guy and the other was, well a girl
(very rare for church). The man, who appeared to think he could take over
church with one breath was crushed almost immediately and laid out several
times. It was very difficult to tell if he was trying or just getting beat
un-mercifully. Moshing and beer bottles breaking went on for a couple more
minutes (20 or so) then it was ended.
After
this he began breaking beer bottles and handing them to sweet shits (if you
didn't accept a bottle that was handed to you remind chuck heap so your rating
can go down .15) after a while of moshing 2 individuals entered the arena. One
was a rather short huskier (or fat) looking guy and the other was, well a girl
(very rare for church). The man, who appeared to think he could take over
church with one breath was crushed almost immediately and laid out several
times. It was very difficult to tell if he was trying or just getting beat
un-mercifully. Moshing and beer bottles breaking went on for a couple more
minutes (20 or so) then it was ended.
The
clean up crew took over from there with such songs as "Love Gun"-Kiss,
"would"-Alice In Chains and "Genie In A Bottle"-Christina Aguilera.
They made extremely quick work of the TOTAL DESASTER! and were treated to a
post church ceremony very quickly.
Overall
the session was pretty good and of course, always entertaining
Church
Rating 7
-Corpsegrinder