Chronic's Fart File

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THE COMMON FART

The Common  Fart is the  fart heard most often.  It is a very
close relative of the "Ripper," but is released with less force. 
Often it  is usually  heard  in groups where people aren't yet
comfortable with  farting  amongst  each  other.    Therefore,
one person in the group gets up some nerve and releases this
common-sounding fart in such  a manner  that everyone now
feels comfortable with group  flatulence..  Usually there is no
smell with the Common Fart.



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THE ANXIOUS FART

The Anxious Fart is let in a place where someone does not
want the fart to be heard.     You may have seen men and
women in book stores  or grocery  stores,  or even  on the
street, letting these farts.    They are generally controlled,
usually barely audible, and require much skill to master.




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THE COUGHING FART

The  Coughing  Fart  is one  that the farter  tries to cover up with a
cough.  My dad used to let these farts all the  time when he worked
at  the  Bingo  Hall.     He  would  stand at the back  of the hall  and
cough, just as a nice common fart was let.    It can be embarrassing
for the farter, and those around the farter, if the timing is off at all,
or if the fart is longer than anticipated.



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THE WET FART

The Wet Fart is one that sounds quite juicy. Quite often
this fart is cause for alarm, and an indication that a trip
to the toilet is imminent.



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THE BLOWER

This fart is similar to the ripper, except it has a bit of a
hollow, windy sound to it.   This is due to farter blowing
all the gas out quickly.  This fart will almost always get
a laugh.



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TIGHT BUN FART

This fart is always recognizable.  It sounds like the farter's
buns were so tight that he/she was in pain while farting.



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THE RIPPER


One of the best farts around is The Ripper.  It is loud, rough, and
always raises an eyebrow or two.    Characteristics  of T he Ripper
often show up in other farts, but make no mistake -  this fart is a
single, powerful gas-bubble that comes screaming from the farter.
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