Damn. Left too much of the page.
I went to Target after she left, and bought some soda, and The Lord Of The Rings, and cat food. Came home and tried to call her a few times, but her phone was off. I sat, and wrote for 2 hours.
She got home and Imed me. And we began to talk. And everything went to hell.
Wow. I can't even really talk about it here, when I think about it this morning. Only to know that someone played a dirty, dirty trick and a couple of people paid for it. I paid for it. Dearly. Lost something last night. More than one thing actually.
I have issues with trust. If I trust someone, I can give them everything I've got. But if I don't then I close up. Tight. Open Chris is a good thing, closed, not so good.
The rollercoaster last night was very strange. I don't understand at all what happened. Well, I do a little. I don't know if I can forgive it. Well, not true. I can forgive. I don't think I can forget though. And that is very very bad.
It's 7:25 now. And I slept for 4 hours. Spent part of the night somewhere that I didn't even want to think about going back to, and the 4 hours of sleep in the arms of someone who cares about me enough to drop everything to come here and be with me. A good friend. And to be honest, someone I'd once wanted more with. But not anymore. What happened last night . . . grrr
Christopher
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